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(Evening Express)   Aberdeen doctors find sex toy in woman ... that had been there for 10 YEARS   (eveningexpress.co.uk) divider line 83
    More: Amusing  
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10672 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jul 2014 at 12:10 PM (18 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-07-24 10:13:36 AM  
She didn't ask for it to be removed, she just needed the batteries replaced.
 
2014-07-24 10:54:16 AM  
The 38-year-old attended Aberdeen Royal Infirmary after suffering symptoms including severe weight loss, lethargy and shaking.

SmackLT: She didn't ask for it to be removed, she just needed the batteries replaced.


I was assuming from the shaking symptom that the batteries were still going strong after 10 years.  If so I want to buy some of them...

/I would used to say buy some shares in the company that made the battery but sadly there is no money in making something last forever.  You have to have people come back & buy more & more of what you make to make money for the company.  Something is very wrong with that system...
 
2014-07-24 10:58:26 AM  
och aye!
 
2014-07-24 10:59:39 AM  
"Voodoo dick my arse!"
 
2014-07-24 11:08:50 AM  
Has she been sexually inactive for the last 10 years or does her current lover just have a really, really tiny dick?

/Anyone else getting the idear that this is one of those "better without pics" stories?
 
2014-07-24 11:09:35 AM  
so they grew up together?
It's nice to see they've stayed so close for so many years.
 
2014-07-24 11:33:41 AM  
EWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

/that ruined my morning

// What can you drink for lunch that could erase something like that?
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-07-24 11:55:09 AM  
Turns out the Journal of Sexual Medicine is a real publication. I'm looking for the article. I haven't found it yet, but I enjoyed these article titles:

"The Assessment of Sensory Detection Thresholds on the Perineum and Breast Compared with Control Body Sites"

"Unusual Masturbatory Practice as an Etiological Factor in the Diagnosis and Treatment of Sexual Dysfunction in Young Men"
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-07-24 12:01:53 PM  

From the "ow ow ow" department:

"A Rare Case of Rectovaginal Fistula Following Consensual Vaginal Intercourse"

Here's the story we were looking for:

Obstructive Uropathy and Vesicovaginal Fistula Secondary to a Retained Sex Toy in the Vagina

Vaginal foreign bodies (FBs) are a rare cause of vesicovaginal, rectovaginal, or urethrovaginal fistulae.

Aim
The aim of this study was to describe a rare case of vesicovaginal fistula (VVF) and obstructive uropathy and to review the literature.

Results
A 38-year-old woman presenting with sepsis, obstructive uropathy, and severe emaciation was found to have a sex toy retained in her vagina for 10 years. This had caused a VVF and bilateral hydroureteronephrosis. Bilateral nephrostomies were inserted and she underwent cystoscopy and examination under anesthesia (EUA) with retrieval of FB. A left ureteric stricture was demonstrated. Transabdominal VVF repair with omental flap and left ureteric re-implantation was performed. The VVF recurred, which was successfully re-repaired transvaginally. Seventy-six full text articles were reviewed. There were no previously published cases of VVF following vaginal sex toy insertion. There are four cases of obstructive uropathy secondary to a vaginal FB in the literature: three pessaries and one plastic cap. There are 44 cases of VVF secondary to FB: 22 plastic caps (typically from aerosol bottles, inserted for masturbation or contraception) and 5 pessaries. At least nine were in girls aged ≤18 years. Average presentation is 15 months (range 2 months to 35 years) after FB insertion. Most cases were managed with surgical repair; predominantly transvaginal.
For better or for worse I do not have access to the full text.
 
2014-07-24 12:02:55 PM  
www.iconsoffright.com
 
2014-07-24 12:09:40 PM  
I'm sure that more than a few people have bought issues of the Journal of Sex Medicine and been
very, very disappointed.
 
2014-07-24 12:13:09 PM  
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-07-24 12:13:38 PM  
All joking aside, it's sad to me that some people learn to live with an absurd amount of chronic pain.
 
2014-07-24 12:13:39 PM  
Considering that batteries start leaking after about 5 years...  What the fark...
 
2014-07-24 12:14:02 PM  
Shouldn't it have turned into a pearl?
 
2014-07-24 12:14:53 PM  

AlwaysRightBoy: EWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

/that ruined my morning

// What can you drink for lunch that could erase something like that?


img.fark.net

Here you go just don't drink it all at once.
 
2014-07-24 12:16:04 PM  
Without even reading the article I'm sensing this is a fat, disgusting beast.
 
2014-07-24 12:16:07 PM  

AlwaysRightBoy: EWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

/that ruined my morning

// What can you drink for lunch that could erase something like that?


Bleach.
 
2014-07-24 12:16:13 PM  
Today on Oprah  meet a woman who has found an exciting way to combine diet and exercise for astounding weight lose, you won't believe how she did it and how you can too.
 
2014-07-24 12:17:31 PM  
I'll hold my opinion until Doc Johnson weighs in on this.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-07-24 12:19:33 PM  
Bslim

By the time she went for medical help she was not fat. See article abstract quoted above.
 
2014-07-24 12:20:35 PM  
O.O

The Comments Rule.
 
2014-07-24 12:21:58 PM  

AlwaysRightBoy: EWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

/that ruined my morning

// What can you drink for lunch that could erase something like that?


Vodka and milk?
 
2014-07-24 12:23:28 PM  
How fat was she?
 
2014-07-24 12:25:29 PM  

derpes_simplex: Considering that batteries start leaking after about 5 years...  What the fark...


Not all sex toys have batteries.

/TMYK!
 
2014-07-24 12:25:56 PM  

ZAZ: From the "ow ow ow" department:

"A Rare Case of Rectovaginal Fistula Following Consensual Vaginal Intercourse"

Here's the story we were looking for:

Obstructive Uropathy and Vesicovaginal Fistula Secondary to a Retained Sex Toy in the VaginaVaginal foreign bodies (FBs) are a rare cause of vesicovaginal, rectovaginal, or urethrovaginal fistulae.

Aim
The aim of this study was to describe a rare case of vesicovaginal fistula (VVF) and obstructive uropathy and to review the literature.

Results
A 38-year-old woman presenting with sepsis, obstructive uropathy, and severe emaciation was found to have a sex toy retained in her vagina for 10 years. This had caused a VVF and bilateral hydroureteronephrosis. Bilateral nephrostomies were inserted and she underwent cystoscopy and examination under anesthesia (EUA) with retrieval of FB. A left ureteric stricture was demonstrated. Transabdominal VVF repair with omental flap and left ureteric re-implantation was performed. The VVF recurred, which was successfully re-repaired transvaginally. Seventy-six full text articles were reviewed. There were no previously published cases of VVF following vaginal sex toy insertion. There are four cases of obstructive uropathy secondary to a vaginal FB in the literature: three pessaries and one plastic cap. There are 44 cases of VVF secondary to FB: 22 plastic caps (typically from aerosol bottles, inserted for masturbation or contraception) and 5 pessaries. At least nine were in girls aged ≤18 years. Average presentation is 15 months (range 2 months to 35 years) after FB insertion. Most cases were managed with surgical repair; predominantly transvaginal.For better or for worse I do not have access to the full text.


Please use the DOI when linking to articles.  They are meant to be permanent where URLs change with the whims of management.

http://dx.doi.org/10.1111/jsm.12575
 
2014-07-24 12:28:23 PM  

dv-ous: All joking aside, it's sad to me that some people learn to live with an absurd amount of chronic pain.


Shiat........ I had a splinter that took weeks to work itself out.
 
2014-07-24 12:28:56 PM  

AlwaysRightBoy: EWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

/that ruined my morning

// What can you drink for lunch that could erase something like that?


Everything.
 
2014-07-24 12:30:48 PM  
i1.ytimg.com
That's looks like it'll hurt.
That means it's WORKING!
 
2014-07-24 12:32:20 PM  

ZAZ: Turns out the Journal of Sexual Medicine is a real publication. I'm looking for the article. I haven't found it yet, but I enjoyed these article titles:

"The Assessment of Sensory Detection Thresholds on the Perineum and Breast Compared with Control Body Sites"

"Unusual Masturbatory Practice as an Etiological Factor in the Diagnosis and Treatment of Sexual Dysfunction in Young Men"


http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/jsm.12575/abstract
 
2014-07-24 12:34:06 PM  
Energizer bunny commercials anyone?
 
2014-07-24 12:34:34 PM  
Was it Ben Wa Balls?

/I bet it was Ben Wa balls...
//That string can be a biatch to find.
 
2014-07-24 12:35:08 PM  
What an Aberdeen sex toy may look like:
www.theage.com.au
 
2014-07-24 12:38:27 PM  
What a pickle!
 
2014-07-24 12:40:00 PM  

xria: derpes_simplex: Considering that batteries start leaking after about 5 years...  What the fark...

Not all sex toys have batteries.

/TMYK!


All the GOOD ones do.  Otherwise, why purchase a toy at all?  Use a cucumber, a sharpie, a candle, a chess pawn....
 
2014-07-24 12:40:10 PM  
They finally found the Loch Ness monster
 
2014-07-24 12:40:38 PM  
This underscores the importance of having a good post-coital inventory program in place.
 
2014-07-24 12:42:12 PM  
Sex toy?  Not as common as tampons.  There is more than enough room for the penis and the tampon to be there together.  It is a biatch to get the tampon out once the string is pushed in, so squat, squat, squat until a piece of the string shows up and you can pull it.

/No, the dick does not have to be small.
//You just never done it like this before.  One week of period is a long time to wait for, and not all girls wear the rag.
// bloody slashies!
 
2014-07-24 12:42:15 PM  
Aberdeen doctors find sex toy in woman ... that had been there for 10 YEARS

Can't believe no one's made a joke yet about waiting room times and the National Health.


/you guys are slipping
//unlike the sex toys
 
2014-07-24 12:45:18 PM  
Happy it wasn't Aberdeen, Maryland.
 
2014-07-24 12:45:23 PM  

elgrancerdo: Sex toy?  Not as common as tampons.  There is more than enough room for the penis and the tampon to be there together.  It is a biatch to get the tampon out once the string is pushed in, so squat, squat, squat until a piece of the string shows up and you can pull it.

/No, the dick does not have to be small.
//You just never done it like this before.  One week of period is a long time to wait for, and not all girls wear the rag.
// bloody slashies!


i296.photobucket.com
 
2014-07-24 12:46:21 PM  

MBooda: What an Aberdeen sex toy may look like:
[www.theage.com.au image 200x331]


Them Scots are pikers...the women of Aberdeen, WA can hide an entire inventory of sex toys. Though, I doubt anyone tried to look.

/what is that sit-down and ride toy? That too, in its entirety
//Virgule virgule
 
2014-07-24 12:47:40 PM  
FTFA: Doctors removed the object and the patient was later discharged from hospital.

So...did it actually cure her?  Did it stay out?  And from where in her body was it removed?  Looooots of pertinent questions not answered, here.
 
2014-07-24 12:51:16 PM  

media-cdn.tripadvisor.com
Bslim:
Without even reading the article I'm sensing this is a fat, disgusting beast.

 
2014-07-24 12:53:00 PM  
Thanks, I was wondering where I left that farking thing.....
 
2014-07-24 12:53:17 PM  

Recoil Therapy: The 38-year-old attended Aberdeen Royal Infirmary after suffering symptoms including severe weight loss, lethargy and shaking.

SmackLT: She didn't ask for it to be removed, she just needed the batteries replaced.

I was assuming from the shaking symptom that the batteries were still going strong after 10 years.  If so I want to buy some of them...

/I would used to say buy some shares in the company that made the battery but sadly there is no money in making something last forever.  You have to have people come back & buy more & more of what you make to make money for the company.  Something is very wrong with that system...



Or you can make something that everyone in the world needs one of and price it through the roof.
 
2014-07-24 12:55:43 PM  

bearded clamorer: Shouldn't it have turned into a pearl?


Comment of the year nominee. LOL
 
2014-07-24 12:55:49 PM  

elgrancerdo: Sex toy?  Not as common as tampons.  There is more than enough room for the penis and the tampon to be there together.  It is a biatch to get the tampon out once the string is pushed in, so squat, squat, squat until a piece of the string shows up and you can pull it.

/No, the dick does not have to be small.
//You just never done it like this before.  One week of period is a long time to wait for, and not all girls wear the rag.
// bloody slashies!


^^

gal I used to work with "forgot" one night, she and her hubby got home from the bar, had some booze fueled rowdy fun, and life went on.  About two months later she's at the doc because of an unusual smell that bathing/intimate washing wasn't taking care of.  Yep, guess what was found up there....ew.

luckily she only had a minor infection and no serious harm was done.  They had had lots of sex since then and noticed nothing wrong.  (until the smell came around)
 
2014-07-24 12:59:35 PM  

Carn: How fat was she?


The abstract mentions "severe emaciation"...so, not very.
 
2014-07-24 01:05:44 PM  

Satan's Bunny Slippers: elgrancerdo: Sex toy?  Not as common as tampons.  There is more than enough room for the penis and the tampon to be there together.  It is a biatch to get the tampon out once the string is pushed in, so squat, squat, squat until a piece of the string shows up and you can pull it.

/No, the dick does not have to be small.
//You just never done it like this before.  One week of period is a long time to wait for, and not all girls wear the rag.
// bloody slashies!

^^

gal I used to work with "forgot" one night, she and her hubby got home from the bar, had some booze fueled rowdy fun, and life went on.  About two months later she's at the doc because of an unusual smell that bathing/intimate washing wasn't taking care of.  Yep, guess what was found up there....ew.

luckily she only had a minor infection and no serious harm was done.  They had had lots of sex since then and noticed nothing wrong.  (until the smell came around)


Jesus, you'd think he would feel something rubbing his dick besides the cervix at the back of her...

oh...

never mind...

carry on...
 
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