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(Slate)   There is only one way to save Gaza, Israel, and Palestine. And it doesn't involve the words "glass parking lot"   (slate.com ) divider line
    More: Interesting, Gaza, Gilad Shalit, Gazans, urban warfare, Benjamin Netanyahu, Hamas, unity government, Iron Dome  
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9663 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jul 2014 at 9:41 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-07-23 08:41:17 AM  
How about "Vitreous Vehicle Storage Area"?
 
2014-07-23 08:41:56 AM  
So what you're saying is, there's two ways
 
2014-07-23 08:43:01 AM  
Porcelain Automobile Plain.  Give 'em a PAP smear, in other words.
 
2014-07-23 08:47:23 AM  
"I remember when this was my plan in 2004"

31.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-07-23 09:01:56 AM  
Article writer makes a few good points and sums up a lot of the current problems well.

Particularly the part about Netanyahu dropping the ball when he freaked out over the PA/Hama Unity government announcement instead of embracing the chance for Abbas, as the last adult left in the room, to chill out his Hamas counterparts.

FTA: 5. The pieces of a solution are in place. Netanyahu and other Israeli politicians are converging on a proposal by Shaul Mofaz, Israel's former defense minister, to demilitarize Gaza in exchange for 50 Billion in aid.

If they can get Abbas and Hamas and the international community aboard it would be good to see infrastructure in Palestine get built up rather than destroyed for a change. Roads instead of underground tunnels. Schools that don't teach hate. That kind of thing.

A lot of people see peace in this part of the world as a pipe dream but just because something is hard doesn't mean you stop doing it.

Failure isn't falling down. Failure is staying down.

TL,DR?  Good luck with that.

/No snark.
 
2014-07-23 09:20:18 AM  
 

quatchi: Article writer makes a few good points and sums up a lot of the current problems well.

Particularly the part about Netanyahu dropping the ball when he freaked out over the PA/Hama Unity government announcement instead of embracing the chance for Abbas, as the last adult left in the room, to chill out his Hamas counterparts.

FTA: 5. The pieces of a solution are in place. Netanyahu and other Israeli politicians are converging on a proposal by Shaul Mofaz, Israel's former defense minister, to demilitarize Gaza in exchange for 50 Billion in aid.

If they can get Abbas and Hamas and the international community aboard it would be good to see infrastructure in Palestine get built up rather than destroyed for a change. Roads instead of underground tunnels. Schools that don't teach hate. That kind of thing.

A lot of people see peace in this part of the world as a pipe dream but just because something is hard doesn't mean you stop doing it.

Failure isn't falling down. Failure is staying down.

TL,DR?  Good luck with that.

/No snark.


Exactly
 
2014-07-23 09:39:04 AM  

quatchi: and the international community aboard


This is the real problem. People decry the conditions and the wars in these places, but if you ask them to enforce the peace, they won't send their citizens to potentially be killed for something they see as not their problem.

I like the idea in the abstract (not that I entirely believe Hamas can go 10 years without trying to kill people) but without international peacekeepers to ensure the demilitarization it'll never happen.

Also, while outside observers call it "demilitarization" the people in Gaza might look at it as "unilateral disarmament" so I'm not too optimistic about the prospect of them taking the deal in the first place. Still, one can always hope.
 
2014-07-23 09:48:05 AM  
It should

img.fark.net
 
Biv
2014-07-23 09:48:17 AM  

BunkoSquad: So what you're saying is, there's two ways


I came to say this.
 
2014-07-23 09:48:47 AM  
Are these the only two options?

1) Israel gives Hamas what they want, wait to see if they slip up, and then declare total war
2) Total war

Or is a two state solution not even on the table for Hamas at this point?

/I hate suggesting it
//I am not trying to beg the question, I am just curious
 
2014-07-23 09:49:19 AM  
That's nonsense. Last week, Hamas issued a long list of demands, in exchange for which it offered a 10 year truce.

Hamas cant stick to a 5 hour cease fire but a 10 year one is doable?
 
2014-07-23 09:49:24 AM  
Here's where Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu made a wrong turn. He halted peace talks with Abbas, denounced the merger, and did everything possible to sabotage it. That was stupid, because if anyone can coax Hamas toward a more rational style of government, it's Abbas

Bibi's goal is to keep the Palestinians divided, and therefore incapable of being a "negotiating partner", and therefore giving him a free hand to establish more West Bank "settlements".  He was extremely successful in this effort.
 
2014-07-23 09:49:47 AM  
We can start by dismantling the Israeli apartheid state.
 
2014-07-23 09:51:32 AM  
Admit it was all one big mistake, shovel up a few cubic yards of dirt, move the Israelis to a new place without any enemies, dump the dirt and call it "New Israel, New Jeruselum... etc?

/place without any enemies.  That's the rub.
 
2014-07-23 09:51:53 AM  
We should give both sides more weapons.  I'm told that more guns makes societies more polite.
 
2014-07-23 09:53:50 AM  
Every solution proposed by anyone in the international community seems to rely heavily on Palestinian capitulation without really asking the Israeli people to do anything.  I'm sorry but you cannot have your cake and eat it too Israel.
 
2014-07-23 09:53:57 AM  
There's no such place as "Palestine"
 
2014-07-23 09:54:39 AM  
Just take the lesson from Germany.  If you don't like a certain group of people near you genocide the shiat out of them and send a couple generals to international court.  You'll become rich as fark and won't have to deal with them anymore.
 
2014-07-23 09:55:32 AM  
Let me guess, the "solution" is to strip the Israelis of their right to defend themselves from attacks, because the Turks Germans United Nations will protect them?

/and it will all be equitable and fair
//because the UN will say it is
///and once they have all the guns, nobody will dare complain, and the Jews can go back to being the good little photogenic victims the left wants them to be
 
2014-07-23 09:56:03 AM  

Plant Rights Activist: Just take the lesson from Germany.  If you don't like a certain group of people near you genocide the shiat out of them and send a couple generals to international court.  You'll become rich as fark and won't have to deal with them anymore.


The Nazis actually wanted to move all the Jews to Madagascar before they started their genocidal bullshiat.
 
2014-07-23 09:56:29 AM  
How about Enhanced Radiation Weapon low yield fission-fusion thermonuclear Wasteland.
 
2014-07-23 09:56:34 AM  

RumsfeldsReplacement: We should give both sides more weapons.  I'm told that more guns makes societies more polite.


Wow. I've already seen the Internet win of the day and it's not even 8am.

Well done, sir.
 
2014-07-23 09:56:42 AM  

Harry Freakstorm: Admit it was all one big mistake, shovel up a few cubic yards of dirt, move the Israelis to a new place without any enemies, dump the dirt and call it "New Israel, New Jeruselum... etc?

/place without any enemies.  That's the rub.


Baja California
 
2014-07-23 09:56:58 AM  

Giltric: That's nonsense. Last week, Hamas issued a long list of demands, in exchange for which it offered a 10 year truce.

Hamas cant stick to a 5 hour cease fire but a 10 year one is doable?


I find it interesting that they're definitely not a terrorist organization, but in exchange for meeting their list of demands they'll stop killing civilians for a set period of time. Assuming they hold up their end, I hate to think of how they'll celebrate its expiration.
 
2014-07-23 09:57:39 AM  
Outlaw Islam.

/Problem solved.
 
2014-07-23 09:58:14 AM  
Perhaps if the Israeli's actually work towards peace and stop calling for a genocide of all Palestinians, then things might progress somewhere. Of course, they'd also have to end the apartheid regime, stop building settlements on stolen land and stop the illegal blockade of millions of innocent civilians.


So yeah, peace is out of the question until the few Israeli moderates come to their senses and take power again.
 
2014-07-23 09:59:47 AM  

doubled99: There's no such place as "Palestine"


Correct.  All those square miles were completely abandoned from approximately 132 AD to 1881 AD.
 
2014-07-23 10:01:12 AM  

dittybopper: How about "Vitreous Vehicle Storage Area"?


That sounds like a gun from Borderlands 2.
 
2014-07-23 10:02:17 AM  
Israel: You guys should probably evacuate, we're going to drop some bombs.
Gaza: Okay, we're coming!
Israel: Well, actually, you can't come in to Israel, since you're Palestinian
Gaza: But you control all of our borders, where do we go?
Israel: Sounds like a personal problem.
Gaza: .....So, stay here?
Israel: If you want, but don't say we didn't warn you!
 
2014-07-23 10:02:55 AM  

Destructor: Outlaw Islam.

/Problem solved.


Outlaw religion.

/will never happen
//people are stupid
///belief in shiat that's not real
 
2014-07-23 10:03:05 AM  

Tatterdemalian: Let me guess, the "solution" is to strip the Israelis of their right to defend themselves from attacks, because the Turks Germans United Nations will protect them?

/and it will all be equitable and fair
//because the UN will say it is
///and once they have all the guns, nobody will dare complain, and the Jews can go back to being the good little photogenic victims the left wants them to be


Did you forget to take you pills this morning?
 
2014-07-23 10:03:20 AM  

doubled99: There's no such place as "Palestine"


And for Hamas there's no such place as Israel. You two should get on well.
 
2014-07-23 10:04:17 AM  
Solution: resettle the Gazans in the West Bank. The Israelis have been building those settlements for so long, why not put them to good use?
 
2014-07-23 10:05:18 AM  

doubled99: There's no such place as "Palestine"


graphics8.nytimes.com
There USED to be.
 
2014-07-23 10:06:02 AM  
ct.fra.bz

I'm sensing some tenseness between you too. What we need to do is untense the tenseness.
 
2014-07-23 10:07:12 AM  
There will never be peace between Israel and the Palestinians because there is too much money being made from their continued fighting. American and European companies make billions selling weapons to Israel and black market arms dealers make billions selling weapons to Hamas and the other terrorist organizations. Until there is no money to be made from all the fighting, peace will never exist there.

It also doesn't help that the U.S. can never truly act as honest brokers because too many of our political and business leaders are in the pocket of Israel and its political action groups.

/always remember, war is a for profit enterprise.
 
2014-07-23 10:07:17 AM  
I think it's about time that we call Gaza what it is; a ghetto created by the Israeli government for undesirables.
 
2014-07-23 10:08:45 AM  
Have all first born Israelis be forced to marry first born Palestinians (and vice-versa). Problem solved within one generation.
 
2014-07-23 10:08:55 AM  

FarkedOver: The Nazis actually wanted to move all the Jews to Madagascar before they started their genocidal bullshiat.


Had they done that then we wouldn't have 90% of the problems in the mid-east that we have today.  It truly would have been a final solution.
 
2014-07-23 10:10:26 AM  

Splish: Giltric: That's nonsense. Last week, Hamas issued a long list of demands, in exchange for which it offered a 10 year truce.

Hamas cant stick to a 5 hour cease fire but a 10 year one is doable?

I find it interesting that they're definitely not a terrorist organization, but in exchange for meeting their list of demands they'll stop killing civilians for a set period of time. Assuming they hold up their end, I hate to think of how they'll celebrate its expiration.


Well a terrorist organization ceases to be a terrorist organization and becomes a political organization when it has positive support from something like 75% of the citizens it is using as human shields.
 
2014-07-23 10:10:32 AM  

Someothermonkey: Perhaps if the Israeli's actually work towards peace and stop calling for a genocide of all Palestinians, then things might progress somewhere. Of course, they'd also have to end the apartheid regime, stop building settlements on stolen land and stop the illegal blockade of millions of innocent civilians.



Plus the Israelis need to allow the Palestinians to return to their homes and property.
 
2014-07-23 10:12:13 AM  
Rich people don't riot.
 
2014-07-23 10:12:41 AM  

RumsfeldsReplacement: We should give both sides more weapons.  I'm told that more guns makes societies more polite.


That's ridiculous, they need to ban assault rifles. I was told that would totally stop all violence.
 
2014-07-23 10:13:07 AM  

Muta: Someothermonkey: Perhaps if the Israeli's actually work towards peace and stop calling for a genocide of all Palestinians, then things might progress somewhere. Of course, they'd also have to end the apartheid regime, stop building settlements on stolen land and stop the illegal blockade of millions of innocent civilians.


Plus the Israelis need to allow the Palestinians to return to their homes and property.


The right of return should be the number 1 demand of all Palestinians.  One secular state of multi-religious peoples should be the second demand.
 
2014-07-23 10:13:27 AM  

Marcus Aurelius: Here's where Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu made a wrong turn. He halted peace talks with Abbas, denounced the merger, and did everything possible to sabotage it. That was stupid, because if anyone can coax Hamas toward a more rational style of government, it's Abbas

Bibi's goal is to keep the Palestinians divided, and therefore incapable of being a "negotiating partner", and therefore giving him a free hand to establish more West Bank "settlements".  He was extremely successful in this effort.


We're not supposed to talk about that. We're not supposed to bring up that world leaders recognize him as a liar that only negotiates in bad faith.
 
2014-07-23 10:13:38 AM  
AIR CONDITIONING IN EVERY HOME
 
2014-07-23 10:16:09 AM  

WhiskeySticks: Destructor: Outlaw Islam.

/Problem solved.

Outlaw religion.

/will never happen
//people are stupid
///belief in shiat that's not real


It's hard to tell people what to believe. It's easy, by contrast, however, to make them keep it to themselves.

As an example: Outlawing pagan religions and replacing them with Christianity worked for Charlemagne and transformed Europe. Of course, he was a bit "heavy handed" (in that he killed your entire village if you got caught not being Christian the second time). What's ironic is that this is basically the same tactic ISIS and other extremist Muslims have been using. Oh, you're not Muslim? Get out or die.

Anyway, it's a system that works. Brutal as all hell, but do you want to solve the problem now, or die by a thousand cuts years from now?

(Islam REALLY needs a major reformation. They're at least 200 years overdue. IMHO, of course.)

/I'm an atheist. Most religions are "mostly" harmless. But there are a few that aren't.
 
2014-07-23 10:16:25 AM  
In all fairness, a glass parking lot is a viable solution.
 
2014-07-23 10:16:36 AM  
i.telegraph.co.uk
 
2014-07-23 10:16:37 AM  
FLASH! AH-AAAA!
 
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