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(Newsmax Health)   Ever wonder why Farkers have lower chances of having osteoporosis, arthritis, heart attack and stroke, kidney stones, cancer causing carcinogens, dementia, and diabetes? Four letters. Here comes the science   (newsmaxhealth.com ) divider line
    More: Obvious  
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3110 clicks; posted to Geek » on 21 Jul 2014 at 9:33 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



25 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-07-21 08:33:23 AM  
Weed?

/no clickee newsmax
 
2014-07-21 08:37:20 AM  
UFIA?
 
2014-07-21 09:42:37 AM  
The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems.
 
2014-07-21 09:46:43 AM  
Porn?
 
2014-07-21 09:54:46 AM  
newsmax health?
 
2014-07-21 09:54:54 AM  
Newsmax has a health section?!?

That might be the funniest thing I've seen in a while.
 
2014-07-21 09:56:23 AM  
Next on Newsmax Health: Reynolds or Store Brand? Which foil repels the most government mind rays?
 
kab
2014-07-21 10:02:38 AM  
'Here comes the science' is 19 letters, not 4 subz.
 
2014-07-21 10:08:14 AM  
Derp?
 
2014-07-21 10:14:58 AM  

Vodka Zombie: Next on Newsmax Health: Reynolds or Store Brand? Which foil repels the most government mind rays?


Fools, the Lizarians live at the center of the earth! A cap on top of your head only intesifies their waves. Be sensible and line your shoes and underwear with foil, that will keep the Lizardian brain waves out while at the same time protecting your spuds from UN troops firing spermicidal x-rays rifles from box vans in their attempt to reduce the population of white people in the USA as part of resolution 17 on population controls.
 
2014-07-21 10:25:46 AM  
Wait, there is a Newsmax Health now!!!!!!??????
 
2014-07-21 10:27:16 AM  
lh5.googleusercontent.com

mattfurey.com
 
2014-07-21 10:28:15 AM  
Aids?
 
2014-07-21 10:29:48 AM  
In that case, I'll live forever. In my tent.
 
2014-07-21 10:46:30 AM  
It's certainly not sex.

Or literacy.  Or dyslexia.
 
2014-07-21 10:47:12 AM  
onions
 
2014-07-21 10:49:40 AM  
Dirt?
Lard?
Gunt?
Pooh?


Am I getting warmer?
 
2014-07-21 10:50:19 AM  
Newsmax?  Does that mean beer is actually bad for me?
 
2014-07-21 10:51:23 AM  
Well that's swell and all but as someone who doesn't drink beer, can we get something on the health benefits of drinking moderate to large quantities of whisky, vodka, gin and occasionally tequila?
 
2014-07-21 11:05:11 AM  

Gaddiel: Well that's swell and all but as someone who doesn't drink beer, can we get something on the health benefits of drinking moderate to large quantities of whisky, vodka, gin and occasionally tequila?


They MUST be healthy! I recently made them part of my complete breakfast, and I can't remember ever being healthier.

/can't remember much, actually, but it can't have been worse
 
2014-07-21 11:25:50 AM  
I give up - I can't think of a 4 letter word meaning masturbation.

/oh yeah -'wank'
//it's wank, isn't it?
 
2014-07-21 11:36:28 AM  

GRCooper: I give up - I can't think of a 4 letter word meaning masturbation.

/oh yeah -'wank'
//it's wank, isn't it?


If it isn't, then it should be.
 
2014-07-21 12:15:30 PM  
Smrt
 
2014-07-21 02:55:48 PM  
As someone who's getting his stent pulled tomorrow after yet another stone, I have been reminded that there are worse things in life than Newsmax articles.
 
2014-07-21 08:32:36 PM  
Yay! I get to break out a song!

Beer is better than Women

I've sailed the deep oceans, I've been to strange ports
I've seen things you would never believe
And in all of the towns, at the pubs I have found
There's one thing that most men will agree

[chorus]
Oh, beer is better than women
Beer is better they say
From Belfast to England, to Guam and New Zealand
From Hibbing to Perth and Bombay

Now a beer doesn't mind if you belch or you fart
A beer doesn't play hard to get
A beer doesn't think The Three Stooges are dumb
A beer's always ready and wet

[chorus]

Well, a beer looks the same in the morning
And a beer that is frigid is best
It won't make you buy tampons when you go to the store
Or ask how you like the new dress

[chorus]

Well, a beer won't get mad if you come home real late
Or make you put pants on to eat
Want to try a new kind? Go ahead, it won't mind!
'Cause a beer doesn't care if you cheat

[chorus]

Still don't ask who I choose; either way I would lose
Between beer and women I think
Without beer I'd go nuts and the ironic part:
Without women there's no reason to drink

[chorus twice]

Well, beer is better
Beer is better
Beer is better they say
 
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