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(Sky.com)   New milk-free vegan cheese developed using human DNA. Wait, cannibals are vegan?   (news.sky.com) divider line 72
    More: Strange, DNA, mammals, animal products, genetically modified organism, Yeast, proteins  
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1307 clicks; posted to Geek » on 20 Jul 2014 at 2:04 PM (13 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-07-20 11:08:32 AM  
Technically, they are vegibals.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2014-07-20 12:43:58 PM  
What if the DNA came from someone in a persistent vegetative state?
 
2014-07-20 12:45:41 PM  
VEGAN CHEESE IS PEOPLE!
 
2014-07-20 01:37:35 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: VEGAN CHEESE IS PEOPLE!


It sure as hell ain't cheese. Pretty sure they legally have to call it "cheese food."
 
2014-07-20 01:47:13 PM  
i.dailymail.co.uk
 
2014-07-20 02:14:40 PM  
Not surprising.  Vegans consider humans an inferior species.
 
2014-07-20 02:15:19 PM  
I got yer human DNA right here!
 
2014-07-20 02:18:31 PM  
The DNA blueprints are inserted into the yeast, which creates cheese that is vegan-compatible because of the lack of animal products.
...
"This DNA is then put into yeast cells where the cellular machinery takes over and produces real milk-protein from the DNA blueprint provided by us."

Um, you do realize that all you've done is created human-yeast hybrids and enslaved them to create animal milk proteins, right?

I can't wait to see vegans wrestle with this from an ethical standpoint. After all, it's still an animal product. What's worse, of course, is that the animal in question is man. That whole "rejects the commodity status of sentient animals" thing is going to be a real sticking point - you've just commoditized a human-yeast hybrid. Dietary vegans may be able to embrace this, but ethical vegans cannot and should not.

Vegans - soy milk is lovely, complete, and doesn't require offenses against nature. Why pitch this crap?
 
2014-07-20 02:19:41 PM  
As an aside, I just sat through Snowpiercer, and I can't help but shudder as that grinning, toothy fool raises his brand-new protein block above his head...
 
2014-07-20 02:23:45 PM  
They eat a lot of swedes.
 
2014-07-20 02:24:50 PM  
I can confirm, that some vegans have no issue consuming animal proteins, as long as the animal source is a human being.
 
2014-07-20 02:25:02 PM  

FormlessOne: The DNA blueprints are inserted into the yeast, which creates cheese that is vegan-compatible because of the lack of animal products.
...
"This DNA is then put into yeast cells where the cellular machinery takes over and produces real milk-protein from the DNA blueprint provided by us."

Um, you do realize that all you've done is created human-yeast hybrids and enslaved them to create animal milk proteins, right?

I can't wait to see vegans wrestle with this from an ethical standpoint. After all, it's still an animal product. What's worse, of course, is that the animal in question is man. That whole "rejects the commodity status of sentient animals" thing is going to be a real sticking point - you've just commoditized a human-yeast hybrid. Dietary vegans may be able to embrace this, but ethical vegans cannot and should not.

Vegans - soy milk is lovely, complete, and doesn't require offenses against nature. Why pitch this crap?


Because PETA doesn't give a crap about humans.
 
2014-07-20 02:26:48 PM  

FormlessOne: Vegans - soy milk is lovely, complete, and doesn't require offenses against nature.


Tasting like yak spooge isn't an offense against nature?
 
2014-07-20 02:31:51 PM  
As someone who is lactose intolerant and likes Silence of the Lams, this is relevant to my interests.


/Not really.
 
2014-07-20 02:35:38 PM  
I was contemplating the possibility of "natural cheese" the other day. That is, a substance created without any human intervention that qualifies as cheese. Like some weird symbiosis occurs between two organisms and as such they end up producing and eating cheese.

Might not occur in nature as we know it, but it sounds like a cool sci-fi idea..
 
2014-07-20 02:45:17 PM  
We better keep an eye on these vegan people, They are hungry for flesh, but don't want to eat animals. Their hunger might progress into something they can't control. Just like rats trapped on a abandoned ship with nothing to eat.
 
2014-07-20 02:46:43 PM  

Inigo: They eat a lot of swedes.


soylent groan.
 
2014-07-20 02:49:41 PM  

Mentalpatient87: I was contemplating the possibility of "natural cheese" the other day. That is, a substance created without any human intervention that qualifies as cheese. Like some weird symbiosis occurs between two organisms and as such they end up producing and eating cheese.

Might not occur in nature as we know it, but it sounds like a cool sci-fi idea..


smeg.
 
2014-07-20 02:50:53 PM  
They don't like  animals suffering.  They have no problem with making humans malnourished.
 
2014-07-20 02:56:07 PM  

uttertosh: smeg.


Ick.
 
2014-07-20 03:06:23 PM  

forteblast: FormlessOne: Vegans - soy milk is lovely, complete, and doesn't require offenses against nature.

Tasting like yak spooge isn't an offense against nature?


WTF soy milk have you been consuming? If you get the sweetened stuff it's normally a damn milkshake. Even if you get the unsweet it's still a soda.

I don't drink the stuff because I enjoy regular milk.

Also tried almond milk, it's ok.
 
2014-07-20 03:14:17 PM  

Mentalpatient87: uttertosh: smeg.

Ick.


Hey, until you've fermented your own wine with your naval yeast, then coupled it with crackers and knobcheese, you haven't fed your hipster properly.

/triple ick?
 
2014-07-20 03:16:46 PM  

kroonermanblack: Also tried almond milk, it's ok.


Unsweetened cashew milk is teh farking shiznit in a vegan White Russian. Seriously.
 
2014-07-20 03:17:06 PM  

uttertosh: /triple ick?


Indeed. And here I was picturing something spilling out of a weird tree.
 
2014-07-20 03:17:58 PM  

Saborlas: MaudlinMutantMollusk: VEGAN CHEESE IS PEOPLE!

It sure as hell ain't cheese. Pretty sure they legally have to call it "cheese food."


You can't call it "cheese" and you can't even call it "cheese food" in the U.S.; all the Standards of Identity for these things in 21CFR Part 133 lead back to milk, which is defined as coming from an animal.

The technical term for this stuff is probably "cheese analog", with "milk analog" being the main ingredient. They'll have to invent a clever marketing name for the stuff, provided its production is ever greenlit by the state it'll be manufactured in and maybe a Federal agency or two.
 
2014-07-20 03:19:39 PM  

Mentalpatient87: And here I was picturing something spilling out of a weird tree.


Got wood? (!?)
 
2014-07-20 03:22:09 PM  
33.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-07-20 03:22:54 PM  

uttertosh: Mentalpatient87: And here I was picturing something spilling out of a weird tree.

Got wood? (!?)


Cheese wood.
 
2014-07-20 03:30:16 PM  

FormlessOne: The DNA blueprints are inserted into the yeast, which creates cheese that is vegan-compatible because of the lack of animal products.
...
"This DNA is then put into yeast cells where the cellular machinery takes over and produces real milk-protein from the DNA blueprint provided by us."

Um, you do realize that all you've done is created human-yeast hybrids and enslaved them to create animal milk proteins, right?

I can't wait to see vegans wrestle with this from an ethical standpoint. After all, it's still an animal product. What's worse, of course, is that the animal in question is man. That whole "rejects the commodity status of sentient animals" thing is going to be a real sticking point - you've just commoditized a human-yeast hybrid. Dietary vegans may be able to embrace this, but ethical vegans cannot and should not.

Vegans - soy milk is lovely, complete, and doesn't require offenses against nature. Why pitch this crap?


The only time I've ever had good soy milk is in a 5-star hotel. The stuff they sell in the supermarkets sucks hard.

I usually stick with almond milk, which is delicious.

/not vegan
//lactose intolerant
 
2014-07-20 03:32:13 PM  

FormlessOne: The DNA blueprints are inserted into the yeast, which creates cheese that is vegan-compatible because of the lack of animal products.
...
"This DNA is then put into yeast cells where the cellular machinery takes over and produces real milk-protein from the DNA blueprint provided by us."

Um, you do realize that all you've done is created human-yeast hybrids and enslaved them to create animal milk proteins, right?

I can't wait to see vegans wrestle with this from an ethical standpoint. After all, it's still an animal product. What's worse, of course, is that the animal in question is man. That whole "rejects the commodity status of sentient animals" thing is going to be a real sticking point - you've just commoditized a human-yeast hybrid. Dietary vegans may be able to embrace this, but ethical vegans cannot and should not.

Vegans - soy milk is lovely, complete, and doesn't require offenses against nature. Why pitch this crap?


The ethics might be made simpler or more complex if the human animal is documented as willingly giving the DNA sample, as then it becomes hard to define the existence of cruelty -- other than cruelty to yeast.
 
2014-07-20 03:35:12 PM  

FormlessOne: The DNA blueprints are inserted into the yeast, which creates cheese that is vegan-compatible because of the lack of animal products.
...
"This DNA is then put into yeast cells where the cellular machinery takes over and produces real milk-protein from the DNA blueprint provided by us."

Um, you do realize that all you've done is created human-yeast hybrids and enslaved them to create animal milk proteins, right?

I can't wait to see vegans wrestle with this from an ethical standpoint. After all, it's still an animal product. What's worse, of course, is that the animal in question is man. That whole "rejects the commodity status of sentient animals" thing is going to be a real sticking point - you've just commoditized a human-yeast hybrid. Dietary vegans may be able to embrace this, but ethical vegans cannot and should not.

Vegans - soy milk is lovely, complete, and doesn't require offenses against nature. Why pitch this crap?


Soy milk is heavily processed via an industrial process, unless you make it from scratch, and is therefore an offense against nature, and can trigger allergies and intolerance (drinking it causes me to stop breathing, for example).

Almond milk is way better.
 
2014-07-20 03:45:56 PM  

kroonermanblack: Also tried almond milk, it's ok.


Coconut milk is good.  I like it far better than soy or almond.

That said, I'm a vegetarian, not a vegan, so I put half and half in my coffee and usually use animal-derived cheese.  Daiya isn't bad for being a vegan cheese, though.

I'd try this human-yeast hybrid cheese.  Why the hell not?

FormlessOne: Um, you do realize that all you've done is created human-yeast hybrids and enslaved them to create animal milk proteins, right?

I can't wait to see vegans wrestle with this from an ethical standpoint. After all, it's still an animal product. What's worse, of course, is that the animal in question is man. That whole "rejects the commodity status of sentient animals" thing is going to be a real sticking point - you've just commoditized a human-yeast hybrid. Dietary vegans may be able to embrace this, but ethical vegans cannot and should not.


I never know if people actually don't understand, or are being intentionally dense.  I'll give you the benefit of the doubt.

The ethical vegans I am familiar with (I'm familiar with quite a few) take their position against using animals for products based on a) the suffering/death required from those animals to provide our food, and/or the lack of consent given to us for taking their lives/making them suffer.  So, factory farms are bad because we essentially torture the animals before killing them.  Milk is bad because we're constantly impregnating the cows, then taking their calves from them.  Hunting is bad because we're killing the animals.  Honey is bad because... I don't know.  Bees are people too?  I start to get fuzzy on the logic once it gets to insects.

Anyway, animal (i.e., human) derived products that are provided with consent are vegan.  It's why breastfeeding is vegan, and swallowing after a bj is vegan.  And, I would imagine, organ donation is vegan, for both live and deceased donors.

Microorganisms aren't sentient in the same way animals are.  Nothing suggests that they are able to suffer.  Thus, taking anti-biotics when you're sick is still vegan.  And consuming yeast (and things made using yeast) can be vegan.

So in the case of the cheese, the yeast isn't a problem, and the human DNA was provided voluntarily (I have to imagine).  So ethical vegans would consider the resultant cheese to be vegan.
 
2014-07-20 03:48:33 PM  

Inigo: They eat a lot of swedes.


And Danishes.

/which in Danish and Swedish
//is called "a Viennese"
 
2014-07-20 04:23:57 PM  

WelldeadLink: The ethics might be made simpler or more complex if the human animal is documented as willingly giving the DNA sample, as then it becomes hard to define the existence of cruelty -- other than cruelty to yeast.


And, knowing that the DNA in question might have come from this guy...

media.skynews.com

...we make our purchasing decisions accordingly.
 
2014-07-20 04:29:11 PM  
So, is this human breast milk DNA? If that is the case, no ethical problem. Not sure it would pass the vegan bar, but for others, I could see that being okay. Other human DNA, not so much.
 
2014-07-20 04:29:37 PM  
Consume, Obey, buy new Smegma brand cheese today.
 
2014-07-20 04:32:47 PM  

MrHappyRotter: I can confirm, that some vegans have no issue consuming animal proteins, as long as the animal source is a human being.


Did you notice that they taste better too?
 
2014-07-20 04:42:55 PM  
I can't believe no one has posted THIS yet.
 
2014-07-20 05:05:39 PM  

SpdrJay: I got yer human DNA right here!


Yes, Chizz(TM) [in my pants] is definitely an option, but we also have a fine Bleu-Wafl(TM) if you prefer that.
 
2014-07-20 05:10:52 PM  
i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-07-20 05:25:01 PM  

FormlessOne: That whole "rejects the commodity status of sentient animals" thing is going to be a real sticking point - you've just commoditized a human-yeast hybrid.


Oh give me a break it's  yeast.
 
2014-07-20 05:29:46 PM  
If it's made of milk proteins, why not just use...I dunno...milk?
 
2014-07-20 05:52:06 PM  

buckler: If it's made of milk proteins, why not just use...I dunno...milk?


Because reasons.
 
2014-07-20 06:34:57 PM  

doyner: Because reasons.


or in the dud in TFA's case, Because wrist tattoo.

I'm not a fan of tattoos at best, but that is one seriously douchy tat.
 
2014-07-20 07:28:13 PM  
 
2014-07-20 08:30:23 PM  
upload.wikimedia.org

/"New milk-free vegan cheese developed using human DNA?"
//"Not as such."
 
2014-07-20 09:27:58 PM  
Not sure I like the idea of eating cheese made using human DNA. Human milk is supposedly not the best for cheesemaking.

Now if they used the DNA of some Jersey cattle, that might be delicious. Although dairy products are awesome, dairy farming is seriously inefficient in terms of the amount of water and feed used, and when the process is industrialized it's hard to argue that you're not being cruel to the animals.

I have no problem with eating meat, but if we could have a product on the market that was indistinguishable from cow's milk in flavor, texture, and composition, and it would both be cheaper and more humane for mass production while also using less valuable land and fresh water.... that seems like a winner to me. Now all they need to do is make the stuff shelf-stable for long periods without refrigeration, and it could be a miracle for third world countries.
 
2014-07-20 10:15:19 PM  

FormlessOne: Vegans - soy milk is lovely, complete, and doesn't require offenses against nature. Why pitch this crap?


Almost all soy is generically engineered, and farming it is pretty devastating on the environment.
 
2014-07-20 10:23:08 PM  

FormlessOne: Vegans - soy milkjuice* is lovely, complete, and doesn't require offenses against nature.


FTFY.

/not milk. ever.

* may also not be juice. What the hell do you call something that is basically an edible ground up and mixed with water? Soy suspension? Soy solution?
 
2014-07-20 10:35:29 PM  
t-shirt seen on Cap Hill in Seattle: "do vegan girls swallow?"
 
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