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(io9)   Space Invaders, the movie: What's not to love about a two-hour drama of shooting at rows of slowly descending aliens?   (io9.com) divider line 114
    More: Stupid, Space Invaders, Akiva Goldsman  
•       •       •

3272 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 19 Jul 2014 at 12:30 AM (27 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



114 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-07-18 10:07:13 PM  
Please let this go green, it needs massive public mocking.
 
2014-07-18 10:08:56 PM  

strangeluck: Please let this go green, it needs massive public mocking.


The story that is...

This will be even more stupid than making a movie out of the Battleship boardgame.
 
2014-07-18 10:09:59 PM  
geek-news.mtv.com

Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!
Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!

Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!
Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!
Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!
 
2014-07-18 11:09:16 PM  
Rumors are floating that Ron Jeremy will be cast as the laser canon.
 
2014-07-19 12:22:58 AM  

strangeluck: strangeluck: Please let this go green, it needs massive public mocking.

The story that is...

This will be even more stupid than making a movie out of the Battleship boardgame.


Well, they can really go any direction they want since Space Invaders doesn't really have a story.  There have been good movies about alien invasions, as well as bad ones, so it could go either way.  The only thing the movie will likely have in common with the game is the name.
 
2014-07-19 12:31:39 AM  
lacklustervideo.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-07-19 12:32:39 AM  

TuteTibiImperes: strangeluck: strangeluck: Please let this go green, it needs massive public mocking.

The story that is...

This will be even more stupid than making a movie out of the Battleship boardgame.

Well, they can really go any direction they want since Space Invaders doesn't really have a story.  There have been good movies about alien invasions, as well as bad ones, so it could go either way.  The only thing the movie will likely have in common with the game is the name.


That's kinda the issue and why it's so stupid. What's the point of buying the rights to a game with no story?

If you're just going to write an original story, then it doesn't matter if it shares the name of some old game.

They may have thought they'd sell movie tickets on the nostalgia factor, but realistically they're gonna get laughed out just like Battleship was.
 
2014-07-19 12:41:11 AM  
Finally
 
2014-07-19 12:42:16 AM  
Yeah... They didn't learn their lesson with farking Battleship?

Jesus, I wish I'd have gone through with the whole making movies thing, the amount of job security is amazing. They'll polish any turd in hopes of getting asses in the seats, I'd always have work.
 
2014-07-19 12:50:34 AM  
i1.ytimg.com
Video game?
 
2014-07-19 01:07:19 AM  

strangeluck: TuteTibiImperes: strangeluck: strangeluck: Please let this go green, it needs massive public mocking.

The story that is...

This will be even more stupid than making a movie out of the Battleship boardgame.

Well, they can really go any direction they want since Space Invaders doesn't really have a story.  There have been good movies about alien invasions, as well as bad ones, so it could go either way.  The only thing the movie will likely have in common with the game is the name.

That's kinda the issue and why it's so stupid. What's the point of buying the rights to a game with no story?


Marketing and name recognition. Take a name people know and slap it on anything. INSTANT MONEY!

/Kill me
 
2014-07-19 01:07:34 AM  

Mikey1969: Yeah... They didn't learn their lesson with farking Battleship?

Jesus, I wish I'd have gone through with the whole making movies thing, the amount of job security is amazing. They'll polish any turd in hopes of getting asses in the seats, I'd always have work.


Battleship, per Box Office Mojo...

Domestic: $65,422,625
Foreign: $237,602,860

They can't hear you over the sound of the sound of all those Euros and Yuan and Yen clinking together
 
2014-07-19 01:07:57 AM  
I think this movie sounds great and I look forward to being entertained by it when it comes out!


/shill
 
2014-07-19 01:08:23 AM  

doglover: [geek-news.mtv.com image 571x334]

Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!
Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!
Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!
Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!
Drop Down! Increase Speed! Reverse Direction!


Came for this, leaving satisfied.
 
ecl
2014-07-19 01:12:10 AM  
cdn.fearnet.com

He learned from Signs... he swears...
 
2014-07-19 01:13:20 AM  

ecl: [cdn.fearnet.com image 560x375]

He learned from Signs... he swears...


Don't worry guys, they can't handle pantry doors.
 
2014-07-19 01:16:00 AM  

RoyFokker'sGhost: Mikey1969: Yeah... They didn't learn their lesson with farking Battleship?

Jesus, I wish I'd have gone through with the whole making movies thing, the amount of job security is amazing. They'll polish any turd in hopes of getting asses in the seats, I'd always have work.

Battleship, per Box Office Mojo...

Domestic: $65,422,625
Foreign: $237,602,860

They can't hear you over the sound of the sound of all those Euros and Yuan and Yen clinking together


Of course, it cost $220 million to make. Less than a third in profits is not considered much of a success nowadays. They'd do better to go the SciFI channel route and not drop any actual money into it and watch the Benjamins come rolling in from people who want to watch it "because it's THAT bad".

Of course, it didn't flop like some movies have. God it sucked, though...
 
2014-07-19 01:22:21 AM  
farm4.static.flickr.com
 
2014-07-19 01:22:54 AM  
fark it why not, atleast it won't be a reboot of a good movie.

Make this.
blog.signalnoise.com

Starring this guy
 1.bp.blogspot.com or  content6.flixster.com  as this type of guy  www.evamonkey.com

Driving this into battle
blog.signalnoise.com

With this guy as the plucky sidekick/ fresh trainee who's young and full of 'tude.
img2.timeinc.net

Who gets captured and dies in the first 30 minutes of the film with his last scene being him getting "rosebudded" by the aliens in an epic 10 minute sequence, that to make believable will be real and will not use cgi.

The main conflict will be earth fighting the aliens on who gets stuck with him, earth fighting to the death to keep him away.

There just wrote the synopsis go have Mr. Torgue/Micheal Bay add some Baysplosins™ to make the script.
 
2014-07-19 01:24:00 AM  

farkingismybusiness: [i1.ytimg.com image 480x360]
Video game?



Favorited
(favorite: space invaders in 1977)


Was just about to post that!
 
2014-07-19 01:28:02 AM  
No, no, no you're all wrong. This is a documentary about people who sit too close to other people in public places.

(sounds better than basing a film on a 30 year old video game everyone's forgotten about)
 
2014-07-19 01:28:34 AM  
www.war-ofthe-worlds.co.uk
 
2014-07-19 01:32:23 AM  
My optometrist had tabletop Space Invaders in the waiting room when I was a kid. I miss the 80s.
 
2014-07-19 01:41:48 AM  
would rather watch this again...
c3.cduniverse.ws
 
2014-07-19 01:44:58 AM  

Spaceballer: would rather watch this again...
[c3.cduniverse.ws image 250x375]


Aliens love David Hasselhoff. . .
 
2014-07-19 01:57:40 AM  

tinyarena: Finally


I can't believe it took this long.

Now make my Defender movie.
 
2014-07-19 02:03:16 AM  
Set a millenia in the future where we have a manner of interstellar travel and give the aliens a Conservation of Ninjitsu rule to our defenses. Rather than being technologically advanced or having superiority of tactics, the aliens are a legion of hivemind which learn how to counter our orbital weapon platforms and space fighters by sending decreasing waves after waves of solders through each line of defense until the last has learned all needed and is prepared to annihilate humanity. Just then, the protagonist realizes he needs to think one step ahead of the enemy, securing our future. There, I tied the f*cking concept of Space Invaders in with a story which will be better than what will be churned out for a quick cash grab.
 
2014-07-19 02:03:31 AM  

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░

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I

I
I
I
I
I
I
I
II
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░░░░░░░░▄░░░░░░░░
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PEW PEW PEW!!
 
2014-07-19 02:19:33 AM  

Mikey1969: RoyFokker'sGhost: Mikey1969: Yeah... They didn't learn their lesson with farking Battleship?

Jesus, I wish I'd have gone through with the whole making movies thing, the amount of job security is amazing. They'll polish any turd in hopes of getting asses in the seats, I'd always have work.

Battleship, per Box Office Mojo...

Domestic: $65,422,625
Foreign: $237,602,860

They can't hear you over the sound of the sound of all those Euros and Yuan and Yen clinking together

Of course, it cost $220 million to make. Less than a third in profits is not considered much of a success nowadays. They'd do better to go the SciFI channel route and not drop any actual money into it and watch the Benjamins come rolling in from people who want to watch it "because it's THAT bad".

Of course, it didn't flop like some movies have. God it sucked, though...


It actually did flop.  The $65 million and $237 million figures are box office receipts, not income directly to the studio. It varies depending on the time (studios get a bigger cut opening weekend) and overseas vs domestic, but in general, the studio gets around 50% of the receipts.  The rest goes to the theaters.

So of the roughly $302 million, the studio probably got around $150 million, give or take $20-30 million.  If the $220 million production cost is accurate, it lost $50 million at a minimum.  That doesn't even include advertising costs incurred by the studio.  While Hollywood accounting makes it difficult to know for sure what a movie may have made or lost, it's a safe bet that Battleship lost a ton of money.  I doubt cable/DVD, etc made even a small dent in the losses.

Universal posted an $83 million loss in the applicable quarter of 2012, with much of it attributed to Battleship.

http://variety.com/2012/biz/news/comcast-qtr-soars-but-u-battle-test ed -1118057310/
 
2014-07-19 02:20:46 AM  

HighOnCraic: Spaceballer: would rather watch this again...
[c3.cduniverse.ws image 250x375]

Aliens love David Hasselhoff. . .


You know who else loved David Hasselhoff?
www.untoldentertainment.com
 
2014-07-19 03:00:36 AM  

Spaceballer: would rather watch this again...


Christopher Plummer: Gettin' Paid [cha-ching]
 
2014-07-19 03:01:12 AM  

psychicdeath99: Mikey1969: RoyFokker'sGhost: Mikey1969: Yeah... They didn't learn their lesson with farking Battleship?

Jesus, I wish I'd have gone through with the whole making movies thing, the amount of job security is amazing. They'll polish any turd in hopes of getting asses in the seats, I'd always have work.

Battleship, per Box Office Mojo...

Domestic: $65,422,625
Foreign: $237,602,860

They can't hear you over the sound of the sound of all those Euros and Yuan and Yen clinking together

Of course, it cost $220 million to make. Less than a third in profits is not considered much of a success nowadays. They'd do better to go the SciFI channel route and not drop any actual money into it and watch the Benjamins come rolling in from people who want to watch it "because it's THAT bad".

Of course, it didn't flop like some movies have. God it sucked, though...

It actually did flop.  The $65 million and $237 million figures are box office receipts, not income directly to the studio. It varies depending on the time (studios get a bigger cut opening weekend) and overseas vs domestic, but in general, the studio gets around 50% of the receipts.  The rest goes to the theaters.

So of the roughly $302 million, the studio probably got around $150 million, give or take $20-30 million.  If the $220 million production cost is accurate, it lost $50 million at a minimum.  That doesn't even include advertising costs incurred by the studio.  While Hollywood accounting makes it difficult to know for sure what a movie may have made or lost, it's a safe bet that Battleship lost a ton of money.  I doubt cable/DVD, etc made even a small dent in the losses.

Universal posted an $83 million loss in the applicable quarter of 2012, with much of it attributed to Battleship.

http://variety.com/2012/biz/news/comcast-qtr-soars-but-u-battle-test ed -1118057310/


I don't trust Hollywood accounting. They argued that they never made any money off the Lord Of The Rings trilogy, and the Tolkien estate had to sue to get a share of the $2.9BILLION box office. Similarly, Harry Potter & The Order Of The Phoenix did over $900million in theatres, but Warner Bros claims to be over $150million in the hole for it.
 
2014-07-19 03:04:08 AM  

Spaceballer: [www.war-ofthe-worlds.co.uk image 332x472]


That's what I misread it as at first. My heart has been shattered in disappointment!
 
2014-07-19 03:24:04 AM  

i156.photobucket.com

"Captain, their movement pattern suggests two dimensional thinking."
"Also, we're out of Funyuns."

 
2014-07-19 03:30:56 AM  
It's been done.

Arcade Attack (1982)
 
2014-07-19 04:44:45 AM  
Trying real hard to remember if space invaders had a story attached...

/Its kinda like making a movie about chess.
/You can write a story about people who play chess, but the game itself has no story to tell.
 
2014-07-19 04:53:34 AM  

way south: Trying real hard to remember if space invaders had a story attached...

/Its kinda like making a movie about chess.
/You can write a story about people who play chess, but the game itself has no story to tell.


Chess is war. War never changes...
 
2014-07-19 04:54:24 AM  
It was a coin-op story.  Shoot at rows of totally dumb enemies in formation, who sometimes shot back randomly.  Eliminate them all, and a new group of faster, lower ones appeared.  Repeat until you run out of lives, and you need to insert another quarter.
 
2014-07-19 05:11:31 AM  

scalpod: way south: Trying real hard to remember if space invaders had a story attached...

/Its kinda like making a movie about chess.
/You can write a story about people who play chess, but the game itself has no story to tell.

Chess is war. War never changes...




Aye, but war movies are always about the people who fight the war.
War itself is just a concept empowered by a bunch of equipment, like sport.

/remove the characters and fallout becomes a game about touring ruins.
 
2014-07-19 05:42:51 AM  

way south: scalpod: way south: Trying real hard to remember if space invaders had a story attached...

/Its kinda like making a movie about chess.
/You can write a story about people who play chess, but the game itself has no story to tell.

Chess is war. War never changes...

Aye, but war movies are always about the people who fight the war.
War itself is just a concept empowered by a bunch of equipment, like sport.

/remove the characters and fallout becomes a game about touring ruins.


I'll never see Battleship, so I guess I'll never understand what underlying story there was there that simply had to be told?
 
2014-07-19 05:47:05 AM  
The story of chess *is* the story of war. There'd be no point in making a movie "based on" the game of chess because it's already been done a thousand different ways featuring a thousand different characters.

Checkers, on the other hand... ;)
 
2014-07-19 05:50:36 AM  
Summer 2016: SLIDE INTO ADVENTURE with Kevin James, Marlon Wayans and Victoria Jackson in "Chutes and Ladders" -- to get to the top, you've got to give it all you got.
 
2014-07-19 05:51:22 AM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: Summer 2016: SLIDE INTO ADVENTURE with Kevin James, Marlon Wayans and Victoria Jackson in "Chutes and Ladders" -- to get to the top, you've got to give it all you got.


(shudder)
 
2014-07-19 05:53:10 AM  

scalpod: way south: scalpod: way south: Trying real hard to remember if space invaders had a story attached...

/Its kinda like making a movie about chess.
/You can write a story about people who play chess, but the game itself has no story to tell.

Chess is war. War never changes...

Aye, but war movies are always about the people who fight the war.
War itself is just a concept empowered by a bunch of equipment, like sport.

/remove the characters and fallout becomes a game about touring ruins.

I'll never see Battleship, so I guess I'll never understand what underlying story there was there that simply had to be told?


Battleship is about doing rad e-brake turns on a ship. With a crew of like 10 people.
 
2014-07-19 05:56:29 AM  

way south: Trying real hard to remember if space invaders had a story attached...

/Its kinda like making a movie about chess.
/You can write a story about people who play chess, but the game itself has no story to tell.


images.paxholley.net
 
2014-07-19 06:04:03 AM  
In my mind, they will market the crap out of it, but then the actual movie will just be "Mandingo" dubbed into Spanish and there will be absolutely no explanation after the fact.
 
2014-07-19 06:16:06 AM  
"slow moving aliens"

Obviously subby never made it past the first level.
 
2014-07-19 06:23:57 AM  

HighOnCraic: way south: Trying real hard to remember if space invaders had a story attached...

/Its kinda like making a movie about chess.
/You can write a story about people who play chess, but the game itself has no story to tell.

[images.paxholley.net image 530x404]


They had to make up a game for that movie, one much cooler than anything in arcades back then.
 
2014-07-19 06:33:00 AM  
In all fairness, they'll probably make a ton of cash off the soundtrack....

//Bloop...bloop...bloop...pew
 
2014-07-19 06:56:06 AM  
Millipede the movie would fare better. Wouldn't make much more sense.
 
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