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(Ohio.com)   Having solved all the states other problems, Oregon decides to go after the makers of 5-Hour Energy because of their deceptive advertising   (ohio.com ) divider line
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3742 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jul 2014 at 4:42 AM (1 year ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-07-18 12:24:25 AM  
Oregon has been part of a group leading a 33-state investigation

But yeah, it's JUST Oregon.
 
2014-07-18 01:16:19 AM  
Oh come on. Five hour energy is a fine product. Sometimes it just takes more than one of them.

Hey, why is my forehead buzzing... flames... flames on the side of my face!
 
2014-07-18 01:45:16 AM  

fusillade762: Oregon has been part of a group leading a 33-state investigation

But yeah, it's JUST Oregon.


Oregon is the only state suing.
Test case.
 
2014-07-18 03:38:09 AM  
Well, that "no crash" line is a bunch of bullshiat.
 
2014-07-18 04:02:51 AM  
I tried one and it only gave me energy for 4 hours and 52 minutes.
 
2014-07-18 04:20:01 AM  

criscodisco: Well, that "no crash" line is a bunch of bullshiat.


 Well, as long as you keep drinking them every five hours you won't crash.
 
2014-07-18 04:44:32 AM  
There couldn't possibly be ill effects from something that resembles speed being sold at the counter when you buy your newspaper.
 
2014-07-18 04:50:41 AM  
The first and only time my brother tried it earned him a trip to the ER.
 
2014-07-18 04:58:44 AM  
It's just caffeine, the other ingredients do nothing.  You might as well drink coffee or take caffeine pills.
 
2014-07-18 05:04:18 AM  
They should go after Red Bull too because it doesn't really give you wings. And it tastes like ass.
 
2014-07-18 05:14:41 AM  
Good. shiat doesn't work.
 
2014-07-18 05:18:09 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-07-18 05:18:41 AM  
Wiki "An October 2010 analysis by ConsumerLab.com found the caffeine content of a full bottle of 5-Hour Energy is 207 mg.[7] (It is not clear whether the "Original" or "Extra Strength" product was tested.)"

From the 5 hour energy site, the MSRP of 12 bottles is $26

207mg per bottle * 12 bottles => 2,484 mg of caffeine total ($2.09 per 200mg)

Compare to caffine tablets at amazon
1 bottle is $5.70
200mg per pill * 100 pills per bottle = 20,000 mg of caffeine total ($0.057 per 200mg)

in short, people are stupid and don't have a damn clue what they're buying
 
2014-07-18 05:20:19 AM  

zamboni: Oh come on. Five hour energy is a fine product. Sometimes it just takes more than one of them.

Hey, why is my forehead buzzing... flames... flames on the side of my face!


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-07-18 05:22:09 AM  
I also noticed in the wikipedia article that there's a decaf 5 hour energy, WTF?!
 
2014-07-18 05:22:15 AM  

duke3522: The first and only time my brother tried it earned him a trip to the ER.


The first and only time I tried it, I wound up wondering if I would finish the night in the ER.

I hope your brother is ok.
 
2014-07-18 05:24:21 AM  

2chris2: It's just caffeine, the other ingredients do nothing.  You might as well drink coffee or take caffeine pills.


Isn't there guarana in there?  (Spelling excuse, I can't remember how to spell that shiat).

I remember when guarana was in a soda when I was in college.  Gave me heart palpitations and a migraine like a steam engine.  So awful.
 
2014-07-18 05:26:28 AM  

granolasteak: The first and only time I tried it, I wound up wondering if I would finish the night in the ER.


I've had 600 mg of caffeine in a single day before.

// only way to survive a trans oceanic flight.
 
2014-07-18 05:52:38 AM  
You mean Carlos Beltran lied to me?
 
2014-07-18 05:57:31 AM  
That 5 hour Energy stuff is shiat. Remember Epherdra? Now THAT was some energy and then some!
 
2014-07-18 06:18:37 AM  
Subby, it's called the posessive. It helps clarify meaning.
 
2014-07-18 06:27:39 AM  

Satanus Maximus: That 5 hour Energy stuff is shiat. Remember Epherdra? Now THAT was some energy and then some!


Sadly, anything that would actually give you energy is illegal these days. Everything sold as an energy boost now is just caffeine. Unfortunately for me, caffeine just makes me sleepy.
 
2014-07-18 06:29:46 AM  

Satanus Maximus: That 5 hour Energy stuff is shiat. Remember Epherdra? Now THAT was some energy and then some!


Five Hour Energy, Energy drinks....none of those ever did anything for me that a couple strong cups of coffee couldn't for a fraction of the cost.   As for Ephedra, I'd be up for days after taking some of those.  My buddy who plays in a semi-popular touring band used to swear by them for keeping awake on the road and calls them "yellowjackets".
 
2014-07-18 06:29:57 AM  

lordargent: granolasteak: The first and only time I tried it, I wound up wondering if I would finish the night in the ER.

I've had 600 mg of caffeine in a single day before.

// only way to survive a trans oceanic flight.


Were you the pilot?
 
2014-07-18 06:30:11 AM  
5 hour Energy gives you itchy arms.
i.imgur.com
 
2014-07-18 06:30:13 AM  
media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com
 
2014-07-18 06:37:51 AM  

August11: Subby, it's called the posessive. It helps clarify meaning.


You should switch to a web browser that has spellcheck.
 
2014-07-18 06:46:01 AM  
Its right there on the label, idiots. Its a Vitamin B megadose and it works great, this has been a safe and well known stimulant for almost a century. Docs used to give B12 shots on the regular for chronic fatigue.

Seems like Oregon cant handke the fact that sonebody came up with a safe, legal stimulant that isnt taxed to death, land of the free my ass
 
2014-07-18 07:10:04 AM  

Satanus Maximus: That 5 hour Energy stuff is shiat. Remember Epherdra? Now THAT was some energy and then some!


farking methheads.  i really miss the days of quality gas station pseudo-speed.
 
2014-07-18 07:33:22 AM  

criscodisco: Well, that "no crash" line is a bunch of bullshiat.


They later clarifed that they ment "No SUGAR crash".

Which is helpful for a 'drink' that doesn't contain sugar.

Kinda like "Gluten free" M&Ms or "Fat free" water
 
2014-07-18 07:33:49 AM  

2chris2: It's just caffeine, the other ingredients do nothing.  You might as well drink coffee or take caffeine pills.


You can buy pure white powder caffeine usp online. It's actually safer to do cocaine than straight uncut caffeine.
 
2014-07-18 07:34:59 AM  
You mean along with their list of people who should EABOD?

/Which was surprisingly accurate, BTW.
 
2014-07-18 07:37:31 AM  
Why is it I can drink a couple of cans of Rockstar and take a nap?

Anyone else experience this?
 
2014-07-18 07:39:12 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: [media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com image 640x407]


I like the way Sir Trollington thinks.
 
2014-07-18 07:40:11 AM  

fat boy: Why is it I can drink a couple of cans of Rockstar and take a nap?

Anyone else experience this?


It's 5 Hour Energy, it says so right in the headline.

Thanks for playing, please try again.
 
2014-07-18 07:42:53 AM  

lordargent: Wiki "An October 2010 analysis by ConsumerLab.com found the caffeine content of a full bottle of 5-Hour Energy is 207 mg.[7] (It is not clear whether the "Original" or "Extra Strength" product was tested.)"

From the 5 hour energy site, the MSRP of 12 bottles is $26

207mg per bottle * 12 bottles => 2,484 mg of caffeine total ($2.09 per 200mg)

Compare to caffine tablets at amazon
1 bottle is $5.70
200mg per pill * 100 pills per bottle = 20,000 mg of caffeine total ($0.057 per 200mg)

in short, people are stupid and don't have a damn clue what they're buying


Dollar General has "Jet-something-or-other" 200mg , 90 pills for about $3.
 
2014-07-18 07:46:43 AM  

fat boy: Why is it I can drink a couple of cans of Rockstar and take a nap?

Anyone else experience this?


Me too. I never get any of the effects other people claim from caffeine.

Also, I've been trying melatonin to help me sleep and I think it's almost having the opposite effect.

otoh, vicodin delivers as advertised :-)
 
2014-07-18 07:56:57 AM  

lordargent: I also noticed in the wikipedia article that there's a decaf 5 hour energy, WTF?!


Most absurd thing I ever saw in a grocery store?  Low-Fat half n' half.  Why don't they just call it milk?  Because those little cartons are MUCH more expensive, that's why.  And, because ...

People are genius.
 
2014-07-18 08:11:05 AM  

duke3522: The first and only time my brother tried it earned him a trip to the ER.


As somebody who used to work in the pharmaceutical industry, I absolutely despise the variance between "Taking X product put me in the ER" and "Taking X product  required medical attention".

The investigation always comes back essentially "Gave patient saline to shut them up and make them feel like we were fixing them.  Released a few hours later".

Then the media would pick up the story and run "Product X puts you in the ER!!!1!!" even though there isnt any evidence of danger.  It was all frustrating enough to make me want to rip out my eyeballs.
 
2014-07-18 08:15:50 AM  
First, the government came for my 5-hour energy.

Don't know they took next, was sleeping.
 
2014-07-18 08:22:53 AM  

willfullyobscure: Its right there on the label, idiots. Its a Vitamin B megadose and it works great, this has been a safe and well known stimulant for almost a century. Docs used to give B12 shots on the regular for chronic fatigue.

Seems like Oregon cant handke the fact that sonebody came up with a safe, legal stimulant that isnt taxed to death, land of the free my ass


Caffeine is already a safe, legal supplement that isn't taxed to death. They're suing over the advertisement, not the product.

You're right about the B12 shots for chronic fatigue- those things are miracles. But 5 hour energy has no B12 (none that your body can absorb anyway)
 
2014-07-18 08:27:56 AM  

Alonjar: duke3522: The first and only time my brother tried it earned him a trip to the ER.

As somebody who used to work in the pharmaceutical industry, I absolutely despise the variance between "Taking X product put me in the ER" and "Taking X product  required medical attention".

The investigation always comes back essentially "Gave patient saline to shut them up and make them feel like we were fixing them.  Released a few hours later".

Then the media would pick up the story and run "Product X puts you in the ER!!!1!!" even though there isnt any evidence of danger.  It was all frustrating enough to make me want to rip out my eyeballs.


I know, man. You work all day to spin a story so people will buy your product, and one farking idiot sticks it in his mouth instead of his ass and no one even cares about your hard work anymore. They all just wanna gawk at the hot newsie reporting from in front of the hospital. Even worse, your boss blames poor sales on you and takes your coffee away, yelling "Coffee is for closers!". Even though you bought that coffee yourself at Starbucks on the way in.
Pharma sales suck, even when you're not giving some 70 year old GP a blow job.
 
2014-07-18 08:37:56 AM  

The Googles Do Nothing: Satanus Maximus: That 5 hour Energy stuff is shiat. Remember Epherdra? Now THAT was some energy and then some!

Five Hour Energy, Energy drinks....none of those ever did anything for me that a couple strong cups of coffee couldn't for a fraction of the cost.   As for Ephedra, I'd be up for days after taking some of those.  My buddy who plays in a semi-popular touring band used to swear by them for keeping awake on the road and calls them "yellowjackets".


I remember the first time I took Ephedra when it was in the supplement, Ripped Fuel.  I took two of the pills for the first dose.  Not too long after taking the pills, I was jumpy.  I couldn't stop moving while sitting down.  I would shake my legs or I'd be tapping my fingers like crazy.  I must've looked like some wacked out anxious-as-fark junkie.  I took those pills in the afternoon and the effect lasted well into the night.  I couldn't even close my eyes I was so wired.  I never took that shiat again, that shiat was scary!
 
2014-07-18 08:41:15 AM  
This deserves a hero tag
 
2014-07-18 08:42:53 AM  

Satanus Maximus: The Googles Do Nothing: Satanus Maximus: That 5 hour Energy stuff is shiat. Remember Epherdra? Now THAT was some energy and then some!

Five Hour Energy, Energy drinks....none of those ever did anything for me that a couple strong cups of coffee couldn't for a fraction of the cost.   As for Ephedra, I'd be up for days after taking some of those.  My buddy who plays in a semi-popular touring band used to swear by them for keeping awake on the road and calls them "yellowjackets".

I remember the first time I took Ephedra when it was in the supplement, Ripped Fuel.  I took two of the pills for the first dose.  Not too long after taking the pills, I was jumpy.  I couldn't stop moving while sitting down.  I would shake my legs or I'd be tapping my fingers like crazy.  I must've looked like some wacked out anxious-as-fark junkie.  I took those pills in the afternoon and the effect lasted well into the night.  I couldn't even close my eyes I was so wired.  I never took that shiat again, that shiat was scary!


Mucinex tablets have the same effect on me.   They actually stop my coughing but I can't take them before bed or I'm all jacked up and can't sleep.  So instead I cough all night and can't sleep anyways.

Life is difficult.
 
2014-07-18 08:55:44 AM  
yes subby, the State of Oregon's AG office can only do one thing at a time... You are a dumb arse.
 
2014-07-18 09:04:42 AM  
Yeah because you MUST solve other problems 1st. I know if I had cancer I would totally stop brushing my teeth and wiping my ass until I solved that major cancer concern.
 
2014-07-18 09:12:17 AM  
... or you can be responsible, and get to sleep on time instead of staring at a screen like an idiot all night.

Hahahaha, I suggested that people be responsible.
 
2014-07-18 09:17:36 AM  

granolasteak: 2chris2: It's just caffeine, the other ingredients do nothing.  You might as well drink coffee or take caffeine pills.

Isn't there guarana in there?  (Spelling excuse, I can't remember how to spell that shiat).


Guarana! Why's that sounding so familiar?
 
2014-07-18 09:18:23 AM  
THANK YOU!!!! Finally, somebody is trying to stop these monsters.  I've been shoving 5 hour energies up my butt without taking the cap off FOR YEARS because of their confusing ads.
 
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