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(The Smoking Gun)   Hot? Check. Redheads? Check. Twins into kinky sex? Double check. Arrested for prostitution at La Quinta Inn & Suites adjacent to the Crabtree Valley Mall? Well, this is Fark (Not safe for work)   (thesmokinggun.com ) divider line
    More: Amusing  
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25635 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jul 2014 at 7:56 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-07-17 10:38:57 AM  
37.media.tumblr.com
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2014-07-17 10:39:27 AM  
"In one shot, seen below, Sarah's face is not obscured. "

that's not all that's not obscured..!
 
2014-07-17 10:40:29 AM  

Jaden Smith First of His Name: They'd be really pretty if they could do their makeup properly and not put asthma inhalers in their bras.


For some reason that's the little detail that just makes it for me.
 
2014-07-17 10:41:11 AM  

GnomePaladin: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: That's the inflator for her left breast.

I think it's broken.


I've heard of people filling them with hard drugs and inhaling them in public.

/not a joke
 
2014-07-17 10:42:34 AM  
Shoot dog, I'd take either one of them or both. But then again I'm not as discerning as I used to be, and I am after all a Tara Reid fan.
 
2014-07-17 10:45:13 AM  

LegacyDL: More importantly: If they're identical twins is it incest or masturbation?


Incest. Still a family member. It it were a clone, or the result of a star trek transporter accident (oooh Intendant Kira....), then it would be masturbatory.
 
2014-07-17 10:45:54 AM  

ArcadianRefugee: colinspooky: I suspect subbs may not quite understand the word 'hot'. OR, is just piling on the irony by the shovel load, which I suspect is the most likely.

I know, right? It's amazing what actual humans look like when actually not airbrushed and actually not having had a professional do their cosmetics.

What was subby thinking?

Land_of_the_Magic_Dragon: When your prference leans more towards the full figured women

Just say "fatties". It's OK. Someone's gotta love 'em; may as well be you.


Dude. They are not going to sleep with you.
 
2014-07-17 10:49:10 AM  
Ok, let's establish the fact that:

A) Mugshots are not glamor shots
B) This is North Carolina "hot" which means on a normal day, they probably look decent enough to f-
C) They clearly do their own make-up (see B)
D) They didn't get into Porn because places like NC tend to keep people glued where they are
E) They aren't strippers because... I dunno, city ordinances? I know it's not as bad as SC, but still...
F) I'm pretty sure they got into because of Ashley Dupre... These girls look like they want to be famous, and Ashley is a good example of girls that get there on the fast track...

Cleaned up, i'd do them... I just wouldn't pay for it...
 
2014-07-17 10:51:16 AM  

Capo Del Bandito: GRCooper: Hotness

Then how the hell would you describe 'Fark Hot'?


As equivalent to English Hot, of course
 
2014-07-17 10:51:39 AM  
Where's the Molly Quin pictures? Fark is slipping.
 
2014-07-17 10:52:09 AM  
If they were not on the horse they would probably look pretty good. But damn in their mugshots looks like they havent slept in days. I used to take a friend of mine that worked at the court to work and you could see the junkies from the arrests the night before, they were almost zombie like.

Have their blood work done, get them bleached ,washed and brought to me.
 
2014-07-17 10:52:46 AM  

Capo Del Bandito: Land_of_the_Magic_Dragon: Women are like steaks

They're great when you sear in the heat and slap some A-1 Sauce on them?


They should be warm and pink in the center?
 
2014-07-17 10:53:51 AM  
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media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com
chivethebrigade.files.wordpress.com

http://i.imgur.com/tFRVqsc.jpg
 
2014-07-17 10:58:35 AM  
Wasted almost 20yrs of my life on 2 different Redheads. Almost got wrapped up with a 3rd till I finally realized they're ALL Crazy! Back to sticking with Blondes now.
 
2014-07-17 10:58:49 AM  
Once again, you're really impressing everyone by trotting out your hot stable of saved GISed "redhead" photos, Mustachioed Chunklord, Internet Pimp.
 
2014-07-17 11:05:14 AM  

GRCooper: As equivalent to English Hot, of course


Do you mean 'Classic Elizabethan Beauty' or straight up 'Chav' which is more or less trailer trash with a cockney accent?
 
2014-07-17 11:05:30 AM  

brap: Once again, you're really impressing everyone by trotting out your hot stable of saved GISed "redhead" photos, Mustachioed Chunklord, Internet Pimp.


Ignore him... please continue the photos...
 
2014-07-17 11:06:05 AM  
Subby, I'll show you a "hot" redhead.  Her name is Meg Turney, and she is a gamer/cosplayer, and yes, I WOULD DESTROY THAT!

img.fark.net
img.fark.net
img.fark.net

img.fark.net
 
2014-07-17 11:07:24 AM  

JoieD'Zen: The DM has better pics -
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2695340/Twins-19-arrested-pr os titution-charges-allegedly-posting-risque-ad-offering-make-dreams-come -true.html


I'm just excited that they're going to make my dreams come true.

I'M FINALLY GOING TO GET THAT BOOK PUBLISHED!

wait. what?
 
2014-07-17 11:08:43 AM  
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2014-07-17 11:12:48 AM  
37.media.tumblr.com
38.media.tumblr.com
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38.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-07-17 11:13:08 AM  

Capo Del Bandito: GRCooper: As equivalent to English Hot, of course

Do you mean 'Classic Elizabethan Beauty' or straight up 'Chav' which is more or less trailer trash with a cockney accent?


A little better than Scottish Gorgeous, roughly equivalent to Irish Meh, and not as attractive as Scandinavian Fugly.
 
2014-07-17 11:14:15 AM  
i6.photobucket.com

They could use a sammach.
 
2014-07-17 11:17:23 AM  
Some of you farkers are insane, these two are in the top of mug shots posted on fark. Lets say they weren't whoring it up for cash and you met them in a bar. Those two would clean up awesome and just think about it, you'd have a story to tell. Not one of you wouldn't fark a pair of 19 fit year olds in a situation without actual life responsibilities... and hep c.

/had two at the same time a few times
//never twins
 
2014-07-17 11:20:46 AM  

justanotherfarkinfarker: 19 fit year olds


How did I flip that

/what's the worst thing about 18 year olds
 
2014-07-17 11:23:17 AM  

GRCooper: A little better than Scottish Gorgeous, roughly equivalent to Irish Meh, and not as attractive as Scandinavian Fugly.


Gotta say, your booty call meter reader is very well tuned.

...how many ugly broads did you go through to make it that well tempered?
 
2014-07-17 11:31:10 AM  

Capo Del Bandito: GRCooper: A little better than Scottish Gorgeous, roughly equivalent to Irish Meh, and not as attractive as Scandinavian Fugly.

Gotta say, your booty call meter reader is very well tuned.

...how many ugly broads did you go through to make it that well tempered?


None - I screwed up and went straight to Scandinavian Fugly. Ruined me for anything less than Scandinavian Meh, which is WAY out of my league ...
 
2014-07-17 11:35:30 AM  

justanotherfarkinfarker: Some of you farkers are insane, these two are in the top of mug shots posted on fark. Lets say they weren't whoring it up for cash and you met them in a bar. Those two would clean up awesome and just think about it, you'd have a story to tell. Not one of you wouldn't fark a pair of 19 fit year olds in a situation without actual life responsibilities... and hep c.

/had two at the same time a few times
//never twins


I'd want to know what the hourly rate was, but other than that, you're basically correct.
 
2014-07-17 11:36:04 AM  

Churchill92: [hititlikefistofangrygod.jpg]

Fetish list:
Redheads: Check
Twins: Check
Kinky: Check
Willingness to do anything: DOUBLE CHECK++

I see nothing wrong here, well except hepatitis, herpes, crabs, or other STD's, but that's why God invented condoms right?


Point of order:  I don't think condoms help vs. crabs.
 
2014-07-17 11:37:30 AM  
i1135.photobucket.com
 
2014-07-17 11:40:31 AM  

GRCooper: None - I screwed up and went straight to Scandinavian Fugly. Ruined me for anything less than Scandinavian Meh, which is WAY out of my league ...


Turn up the charm then.

Or get rich.

Oh! Or both!
 
2014-07-17 11:42:31 AM  

Capo Del Bandito: GRCooper: None - I screwed up and went straight to Scandinavian Fugly. Ruined me for anything less than Scandinavian Meh, which is WAY out of my league ...

Turn up the charm then.

Or get rich.

Oh! Or both!


Hmm - maybe a kickstarter: "Scandinavian Meh for GRCooper"
 
2014-07-17 11:48:16 AM  

CeroX: Ok, let's establish the fact that:

A) Mugshots are not glamor shots
B) This is North Carolina "hot" which means on a normal day, they probably look decent enough to f-
C) They clearly do their own make-up (see B)
D) They didn't get into Porn because places like NC tend to keep people glued where they are
E) They aren't strippers because... I dunno, city ordinances? I know it's not as bad as SC, but still...
F) I'm pretty sure they got into because of Ashley Dupre... These girls look like they want to be famous, and Ashley is a good example of girls that get there on the fast track...

Cleaned up, i'd do them... I just wouldn't pay for it...


Jacksonville, right outside of Camp LeJeune.  There are at least 3 or 4 clubs that I remember.  Those sluts would be making $1000 a night easy, and probably be the dependent spouses with medical and dental insurance of some LCpls or Sergeants within 6 months.
 
2014-07-17 11:50:05 AM  

Lapdance: Wasted almost 20yrs of my life on 2 different Redheads. Almost got wrapped up with a 3rd till I finally realized they're ALL Crazy! Back to sticking with it into Blondes now.


There.  FTFY.
 
2014-07-17 11:52:14 AM  

justanotherfarkinfarker: justanotherfarkinfarker: 19 fit year olds

How did I flip that

/what's the worst thing about 18 year olds


Not sure how you put the word "fit" in there.  They're skinny because of the drugs.
 
2014-07-17 11:56:45 AM  

machoprogrammer: Heroin addicted prostitutes? 

No thanks. Odds of them having the HIV are pretty damn high


That along with Herpes and Hep-C.
 
2014-07-17 12:04:43 PM  
A lot of you have no idea how to tell the difference between a real redhead and a blond or brunette with liberal amounts of hair dye.

Just dying your hair fake red doesn't make one a redhead.
 
2014-07-17 12:06:14 PM  

Nix Nightbird: A lot of you have no idea how to tell the difference between a real redhead and a blond or brunette with liberal amounts of hair dye.

Just dying your hair fake red doesn't make one a redhead.


I've had to stop many a "redhead" from blowing me.  Once I could see the top of her head and see her roots, it was such a turn off I made them stop and apologize to me.
 
2014-07-17 12:11:27 PM  
In a June 13 Facebook post, Katelyn told a male acquaintance that she and her sister were working to "get our shiat together" and "trying to turn our live around and better our selves." The message, which referred to prior drug use, concluded, "we bout to start workin makeing honest money."

img.fark.net
 
2014-07-17 12:21:06 PM  

devildog123: CeroX: Ok, let's establish the fact that:

A) Mugshots are not glamor shots
B) This is North Carolina "hot" which means on a normal day, they probably look decent enough to f-
C) They clearly do their own make-up (see B)
D) They didn't get into Porn because places like NC tend to keep people glued where they are
E) They aren't strippers because... I dunno, city ordinances? I know it's not as bad as SC, but still...
F) I'm pretty sure they got into because of Ashley Dupre... These girls look like they want to be famous, and Ashley is a good example of girls that get there on the fast track...

Cleaned up, i'd do them... I just wouldn't pay for it...

Jacksonville, right outside of Camp LeJeune.  There are at least 3 or 4 clubs that I remember.  Those sluts would be making $1000 a night easy, and probably be the dependent spouses with medical and dental insurance of some LCpls or Sergeants within 6 months.


Like i said, i didn't know why not... It's more likely they thought they were going to become rich and famous hookers like Ashley one day... delusions of grandeur and all that...
 
2014-07-17 12:21:51 PM  
Fake redheads are worse than natural redheads. Thats because they know the reputation of redheads and want be that (as opposed to being born that way).
 
2014-07-17 12:27:10 PM  

TrainingWheelsNeeded: I'm going to need two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a saltshaker half-full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... Also, a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of beer, a pint of raw ether, two dozen amyls, and a cab idling in the park lot next to the Crabtree Mall - stat - let's do this.


I believe we just found Keith Richards fark handle.
 
2014-07-17 12:29:51 PM  
I defend subby's claim that they are hot.  Here in MN, they would be super models.  In a threesome you combine their score: two 5's gets you a 10.  Bro code.

/I'll be in my bunk
//crying
///three
 
2014-07-17 12:31:51 PM  
I'd swing by Crabtree mall on my way home from work but there's too much traffic at that time, maybe later.
 
2014-07-17 12:34:44 PM  
As I like to say, usually regarding food and movies, I'm blessed with low standards.  If either or both of them had the same standards, that would be swell.

// The first order of business would be getting them to eat some sammiches.
 
2014-07-17 12:40:30 PM  

az28: I really dont get why one of them has bail set at 4000 and the other at 8000.


One of them skipped a court appearance for a different charge in 2013.
 
2014-07-17 12:44:31 PM  

FlashHarry: In a June 13 Facebook post, Katelyn told a male acquaintance that she and her sister were working to "get our shiat together" and "trying to turn our live around and better our selves." The message, which referred to prior drug use, concluded, "we bout to start workin makeing honest money."

[img.fark.net image 850x550]


I had to move about 10 feet back from my screen before I could see that.
 
2014-07-17 12:45:25 PM  

Tyrone Slothrop: buntz: You know, in theory having sex with twins is great.
But I think in reality once I got there I would be thinking "Ew, you're sisters"

/I must be getting old

The taboo against incest is based on the increased chance of genetic deficiency if children are produced. That can't happen in this case.


Social taboos do not work that way!

i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-07-17 12:52:20 PM  

Nix Nightbird: A lot of you have no idea how to tell the difference between a real redhead and a blond or brunette with liberal amounts of hair dye.


It's not that we can't tell the difference.  It's that we've actually experienced sex with women, and are past quibbling over silly things like "authenticity".
 
2014-07-17 12:53:52 PM  

FTDA: az28: I really dont get why one of them has bail set at 4000 and the other at 8000.

One of them skipped a court appearance for a different charge in 2013.


yes, but how do they know which one?
 
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