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(WRAL)   Crack investigative minds on the Myrtle Beach, SC police force figure out that woman set to appear in court on fraud and identity theft charges did NOT actually conveniently get swept out to sea and drown two days before her trial   (wral.com) divider line 32
    More: Obvious  
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4075 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jul 2014 at 6:32 AM (10 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



32 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-07-10 05:46:36 AM
Them some crazy eyes.

Get in line, you can borrow my helmet.
 
2014-07-10 06:43:20 AM
Would have worked in Florida.
 
2014-07-10 06:58:03 AM
That pic could be a DSYDIC meme.
 
2014-07-10 07:38:11 AM

wildcardjack: Would have worked in Florida.


It did work in Florida. CSB:

I used to hang out with Chuck in St Pete years ago and he was on the edge of the drug culture there. (I know, drug culture in St Pete, FL?) He had a young friend over once when I was there who was due in court for sentencing on drug charges and facing about 15 years. The young friend wanted to fake his death and was going to ride his bicycle into the gulf and leave the state. I told him that was too obvious, and that he should get a bunch of his friends together on St Pete beach and get them all stoned. Then all he had to do was go out about 50 ft in the water and just walk about a half-mile and come back to shore and hitch a ride back to town and leave the state. About a week later I saw the young guy at Chuck's place and he showed me a St Pete Times article about his "drowning," complete with a quote from the Sheriff's Dept about how the currents on that particular stretch of beach were treacherous. I was surprised he actually did it, and I didn't hear about him after, so I assume he made it. /CSB
 
2014-07-10 07:46:59 AM
Disappear before a court date?

One Day - Extremely Convenient  - Judge will issue a warrant
Two Days - Mighty Convenient- Judge will issue a warrant 
Three Days - Convenient  - Judge will issue a warrant
Four Days - Not Very Convenient - Judge will listen to your story.  Might issue a warrant
Five Days - Inconvenient - Judge will shrug and say "Next Case"
Six Days - Very Inconvenient - Judge will offer his/her condolences
Seven Days or More - Not a Hint of Impropriety. - Judge will attend the fake funeral. Make sure it's a closed casket.
 
2014-07-10 07:49:03 AM
Moe Syzlak unwilling to comment.
 
2014-07-10 07:57:08 AM

Tr0mBoNe: Them some crazy eyes.

Get in line, you can borrow my helmet.


This.

/the eyes have it
 
2014-07-10 08:07:29 AM
In Florida many years ago, a carpenter who worked for my dad disappeared. They found his truck with the keys in it, his wallet, an empty liquor bottle  and his boots next to a canal. He was due in court on a  forgery charge and was in the middle of a divorce. The cops assumed he killed himself. Four years later, my dad bumped into him on a street in Houston.
 
2014-07-10 08:07:30 AM
img.fark.net

Yeah, I'd probably hit it,
The crazy ones are usually great in the sack.
Just have an escape plan in place.
 
2014-07-10 08:10:20 AM
Insert "Jodi Arias warning" here.
 
2014-07-10 08:12:07 AM

wambu: In Florida many years ago, a carpenter who worked for my dad disappeared. They found his truck with the keys in it, his wallet, an empty liquor bottle  and his boots next to a canal. He was due in court on a  forgery charge and was in the middle of a divorce. The cops assumed he killed himself. Four years later, my dad bumped into him on a street in Houston.


I'll bet he was decomposed pretty bad.
 
2014-07-10 08:24:31 AM

wildcardjack: Would have worked in Florida.


Hub Lawless approves
Wait. what?
 
2014-07-10 08:30:25 AM

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: wambu: In Florida many years ago, a carpenter who worked for my dad disappeared. They found his truck with the keys in it, his wallet, an empty liquor bottle  and his boots next to a canal. He was due in court on a  forgery charge and was in the middle of a divorce. The cops assumed he killed himself. Four years later, my dad bumped into him on a street in Houston.

I'll bet he was decomposed pretty bad.


That's a rotten thing to say
 
2014-07-10 08:33:18 AM

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: wambu: In Florida many years ago, a carpenter who worked for my dad disappeared. They found his truck with the keys in it, his wallet, an empty liquor bottle  and his boots next to a canal. He was due in court on a  forgery charge and was in the middle of a divorce. The cops assumed he killed himself. Four years later, my dad bumped into him on a street in Houston.

I'll bet he was decomposed pretty bad.


I LOLed
 
2014-07-10 08:37:43 AM
And still some insist on believing that those IRS emails were "lost".
 
2014-07-10 09:03:13 AM

fat boy: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: wambu: In Florida many years ago, a carpenter who worked for my dad disappeared. They found his truck with the keys in it, his wallet, an empty liquor bottle  and his boots next to a canal. He was due in court on a  forgery charge and was in the middle of a divorce. The cops assumed he killed himself. Four years later, my dad bumped into him on a street in Houston.

I'll bet he was decomposed pretty bad.

That's a rotten thing to say



Why are you making such a big stink out of this?
 
2014-07-10 09:06:20 AM

wambu: In Florida many years ago, a carpenter who worked for my dad disappeared. They found his truck with the keys in it, his wallet, an empty liquor bottle  and his boots next to a canal. He was due in court on a  forgery charge and was in the middle of a divorce. The cops assumed he killed himself. Four years later, my dad bumped into him on a street in Houston.


But how do you live, work, etc. while on the run like that? Especially now that everything requires ID numbers and so on?

/asking for a friend
 
2014-07-10 09:19:30 AM
Worst.selfie.ever

Looks like she's talking to the family dog

wwwcache.wral.com

Also crazy eyes
 
2014-07-10 09:23:51 AM

LesterB: But how do you live, work, etc. while on the run like that? Especially now that everything requires ID numbers and so on?

/asking for a friend


Go down to Home Depot and ask around.
 
2014-07-10 09:24:34 AM

LesterB: wambu: In Florida many years ago, a carpenter who worked for my dad disappeared. They found his truck with the keys in it, his wallet, an empty liquor bottle  and his boots next to a canal. He was due in court on a  forgery charge and was in the middle of a divorce. The cops assumed he killed himself. Four years later, my dad bumped into him on a street in Houston.

But how do you live, work, etc. while on the run like that? Especially now that everything requires ID numbers and so on?

/asking for a friend


This was 40 years ago. He was living under his real identity and was returned to FL . . . alive.
 
2014-07-10 09:41:46 AM
If you know anything about MB, it is th ebeach for people from Penn and Ohio, and the lifeguards do not allow people in th eocean past their knees without going all "nanny state," with their whistles.  Ergo she would never have been able to get deep enough to drown.  What is amazing is husband went along with  her story and now he gets to spend sometime in the jail.
 
2014-07-10 09:43:53 AM
So they haven't actually found her yet?  Boy, won't they look like assholes if she really did drown?
 
2014-07-10 09:50:31 AM

2xcited: If you know anything about MB, it is th ebeach for people from Penn and Ohio, and the lifeguards do not allow people in th eocean past their knees without going all "nanny state," with their whistles.


So... guards in SC don't realize both Ohio and Pennsylvania are coastal states?
 
2014-07-10 09:51:36 AM

2xcited: If you know anything about MB, it is th ebeach for people from Penn and Ohio, and the lifeguards do not allow people in th eocean past their knees without going all "nanny state," with their whistles.  Ergo she would never have been able to get deep enough to drown.  What is amazing is husband went along with  her story and now he gets to spend sometime in the jail.


OR...the husband is brilliant.  That woman looks nuts.  He could have bumped her off and made it look like a flimsy attempt to avoid court.  Everyone would think she's hiding out somewhere to avoid jail - meanwhile, he gets a slap on the wrist, her body is decomposing as we speak and he walks in a few weeks while no one even considers he just pulled off the perfect murder.
 
2014-07-10 09:52:49 AM

fireclown: And still some insist on believing that those IRS emails were "lost".


Are you saying you think she has them?
 
2014-07-10 09:53:48 AM

Too Pretty For Prison: 2xcited: If you know anything about MB, it is th ebeach for people from Penn and Ohio, and the lifeguards do not allow people in th eocean past their knees without going all "nanny state," with their whistles.  Ergo she would never have been able to get deep enough to drown.  What is amazing is husband went along with  her story and now he gets to spend sometime in the jail.

OR...the husband is brilliant.  That woman looks nuts.  He could have bumped her off and made it look like a flimsy attempt to avoid court.  Everyone would think she's hiding out somewhere to avoid jail - meanwhile, he gets a slap on the wrist, her body is decomposing as we speak and he walks in a few weeks while no one even considers he just pulled off the perfect murder.


So...you watch a lot of the ID channel too?
 
2014-07-10 10:30:23 AM

LesterB: wambu: In Florida many years ago, a carpenter who worked for my dad disappeared. They found his truck with the keys in it, his wallet, an empty liquor bottle  and his boots next to a canal. He was due in court on a  forgery charge and was in the middle of a divorce. The cops assumed he killed himself. Four years later, my dad bumped into him on a street in Houston.

But how do you live, work, etc. while on the run like that? Especially now that everything requires ID numbers and so on?

/asking for a friend


Either steal an SSN or tell your craigslist roommate you have really bad credit and have to put their name on all the bills. Bank at First National Mattress, work for a small local employer who either doesn't care or doesn't use e-verify and get your checks cashed for a fee at the gas station or grocery store. I'd feel bad giving this info out if there weren't a few million people doing it in the US.
 
2014-07-10 10:37:02 AM

Crass and Jaded Mother Farker: fireclown: And still some insist on believing that those IRS emails were "lost".

Are you saying you think she has them?


somebody damned well does.  Or did.
 
2014-07-10 10:41:47 AM

wambu: In Florida many years ago, a carpenter who worked for my dad disappeared. They found his truck with the keys in it, his wallet, an empty liquor bottle  and his boots next to a canal. He was due in court on a  forgery charge and was in the middle of a divorce. The cops assumed he killed himself. Four years later, my dad bumped into him on a street in Houston.


i read that post in the voice of Robert stack.
 
2014-07-10 11:22:24 AM

2xcited: If you know anything about MB, it is th ebeach for people from Penn and Ohio, and the lifeguards do not allow people in th eocean past their knees without going all "nanny state," with their whistles.  Ergo she would never have been able to get deep enough to drown.  What is amazing is husband went along with  her story and now he gets to spend sometime in the jail.


I go down to Myrtle Beach a couple times a year. I don't recall ever even seeing a lifeguard.
 
2014-07-10 12:17:56 PM

2xcited: If you know anything about MB, it is th ebeach for people from Penn and Ohio, and the lifeguards do not allow people in th eocean past their knees without going all "nanny state," with their whistles.  Ergo she would never have been able to get deep enough to drown.  What is amazing is husband went along with  her story and now he gets to spend sometime in the jail.


Myrtle Beach:  Lifeguards?  What's that?  Is it like miniature golf or something the Ripley's Believe it or Not Museum might have?  Have you been to the outlet malls yet?  How about a round of golf?
 
2014-07-10 07:57:59 PM

This text is now purple: 2xcited: If you know anything about MB, it is th ebeach for people from Penn and Ohio, and the lifeguards do not allow people in th eocean past their knees without going all "nanny state," with their whistles.

So... guards in SC don't realize both Ohio and Pennsylvania are coastal states?


I never knew the U.S. had a North coast.
 
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