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(CBS DC)   World Cup teams that forbade players to have sex didn't advance past the round of 16. Apparently it's harder to score when you aren't allowed to score   (washington.cbslocal.com) divider line 45
    More: Followup, world cup teams, World Cup, Bosnia and Herzegovina  
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2881 clicks; posted to Sports » on 09 Jul 2014 at 9:16 AM (46 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-07-09 09:20:05 AM  
Germany must have gotten very crazy the night before.
 
2014-07-09 09:24:14 AM  

lack of warmth: Germany must have gotten very crazy the night before.


empirical proof that german scheisse > brazillian fart porn
 
2014-07-09 09:26:27 AM  
All the teams that didn't allow women on the team got eliminated as well.  Coincidence?
 
2014-07-09 09:27:10 AM  
i47.tinypic.com
 
2014-07-09 09:28:22 AM  
There is some proof to that. Sex releases a lot of testosterone, and endorphins in men. So if they are farking everything in sight they will hit harder and take harder hits.
 
2014-07-09 09:28:30 AM  
img.fark.net
You don't score until you score.

/until you score
//culmination
 
2014-07-09 09:31:48 AM  
Well that settles it.  Fark everything in sight, starting with your computer, right now.
 
2014-07-09 09:39:07 AM  

thatboyoverthere: There is some proof to that. Sex releases a lot of testosterone, and endorphins in men. So if they are farking everything in sight they will hit harder and take harder hits.


And not cry like a little girl on the field after taking a knee to the back.

/I've shaken off worse.
//I would understand if he got nailed into the ground with that knee, but not a mid air bump.
 
2014-07-09 09:40:29 AM  
This is about actual sex with other people, right?

rcd.typepad.com
 
2014-07-09 09:40:40 AM  
Are they allowed to use their hands?
 
2014-07-09 09:41:46 AM  
I predict and attempt at world domination by Brazil in 25-30 years.
 
2014-07-09 09:42:26 AM  
I remember pregame sex before basketball games back in HS.......Oh those were the days!
 
2014-07-09 09:46:42 AM  

lack of warmth: thatboyoverthere: There is some proof to that. Sex releases a lot of testosterone, and endorphins in men. So if they are farking everything in sight they will hit harder and take harder hits.

And not cry like a little girl on the field after taking a knee to the back.

/I've shaken off worse.
//I would understand if he got nailed into the ground with that knee, but not a mid air bump.


That little "bump" actually fractured a vertebrae
 
2014-07-09 09:46:52 AM  

lack of warmth: thatboyoverthere: There is some proof to that. Sex releases a lot of testosterone, and endorphins in men. So if they are farking everything in sight they will hit harder and take harder hits.

And not cry like a little girl on the field after taking a knee to the back.

/I've shaken off worse.
//I would understand if he got nailed into the ground with that knee, but not a mid air bump.


da faq?  A vertebrae on his back broke.  You must be this guy:
uncommonshow.com
 
2014-07-09 09:47:31 AM  

Green Smoke: [img.fark.net image 480x360]
You don't score until you score.

/until you score
//culmination


Nice.
 
2014-07-09 09:53:49 AM  
Morons have a hard time competing?  No kidding.
 
2014-07-09 09:53:51 AM  
They finished early?
 
2014-07-09 09:55:53 AM  
In college, we had a rule, that we couldn't have sex until the next game if we lost
 
2014-07-09 09:56:36 AM  
Can't play, balls are full.
 
2014-07-09 10:08:28 AM  

i.imgur.com
"Women weaken legs!"

 
2014-07-09 10:09:26 AM  

tennesseemike: In college, we had a rule, that we couldn't have sex until the next game if we lost


With each other?
 
2014-07-09 10:14:22 AM  

tennesseemike: In college, we had a rule, that we couldn't have sex until the next game if we lost


Same for us except for slumpbusters.

/Ask Mark Grace
 
2014-07-09 10:21:15 AM  
Approves.

assets.sbnation.com
 
2014-07-09 10:21:49 AM  
Germany farked Brazil on the field.
 
2014-07-09 10:22:03 AM  
Lots of good sex makes everything go better.
 
2014-07-09 10:22:07 AM  
cinemafanatic.files.wordpress.com
You made me promise not to get you excited.
 
2014-07-09 10:23:43 AM  

Azz Pumper: I remember pregame sex before basketball games back in HS.......Oh those were the days!



your screen name paired with this comment just made me spit out my water
 
2014-07-09 10:29:54 AM  
Were they afraid that sex would sap and impurify their precious bodily fluids? Just such a weird superstition.
 
2014-07-09 10:38:17 AM  
I can sort of see the rationalization behind this for boxing, especially the higher weight classes, since you (seemingly) benefit from being angry/frustrated to the point of being ready to kill someone.

Soccer, ,however, seems to require a more relaxed, balanced mindset, and I think getting laid would be helpful, not hurtful, to this.

/Not an expert at either sport
//Soccer or boxing, that is :P
 
2014-07-09 10:46:07 AM  
Well, just duh! The old belief that athletes having sex before a game diminished their performance was disproved just a few years ago. You know, like 1970.
 
2014-07-09 10:50:55 AM  
75% of the teams competing in the World Cup didn't make it past the round of 16. TFA says that only four teams out of 32 banned sex. So, if you go purely by numbers and assume each team is exactly equal, then half a celibate team would have made it to the quarterfinals.

Maybe it's coincidence. Maybe the fact that none of the four teams with the ban were even remotely favourites in the first place.
 
2014-07-09 10:58:56 AM  
"Focus on the game. Don't think about having sex tonight if we lose. Focus on the ball. Don't think about the fun tonight if we lose...."
 
2014-07-09 11:01:47 AM  

tennesseemike: In college, we had a rule, that we couldn't have sex until the next game if we lost


I'm sure everybody on the team adhered to the rule and kept their honor. No one disrespected their teammates by having sex anyway and lying about it later.
 
2014-07-09 11:17:48 AM  

Azz Pumper: I remember pregame sex before basketball games back in HS.......Oh those were the days!


You should've reported your coach to the authorities....because of the ass pumping he gave you. Hey oh!

/I keed :)
 
2014-07-09 11:18:32 AM  
How would you really be turning down all that fan tail? like anyone really does that, you fark waaay outside your weight class as a professional athlete. those guys ain't turning down tens.
 
2014-07-09 11:24:38 AM  
With each other, subby?
 
2014-07-09 11:39:08 AM  

Azz Pumper: I remember pregame sex before basketball games back in HS.......Oh those were the days!


Did your dad give you a reach around?
 
2014-07-09 11:40:12 AM  

LIKES TO HAVE FREQUENT SEX BEFORE MATCHES

media.ufc.tv


IS UNBEATEN WITH MOST MATCHES LASTING LESS THAN A MINUTE BY SUBMISSION

 
2014-07-09 11:50:50 AM  

OtherLittleGuy: LIKES TO HAVE FREQUENT SEX BEFORE MATCHES

[media.ufc.tv image 850x566]


IS UNBEATEN WITH MOST MATCHES LASTING LESS THAN A MINUTE BY SUBMISSION


I'd submit to it, hurr hurr.
 
2014-07-09 11:51:35 AM  

OtherLittleGuy: LIKES TO HAVE FREQUENT SEX BEFORE MATCHES...IS UNBEATEN WITH MOST MATCHES LASTING LESS THAN A MINUTE BY SUBMISSION

 
If I were matched with her, I would also last less than a minute.
 
2014-07-09 12:08:09 PM  

devilEther: OtherLittleGuy: LIKES TO HAVE FREQUENT SEX BEFORE MATCHES...IS UNBEATEN WITH MOST MATCHES LASTING LESS THAN A MINUTE BY SUBMISSION

If I were matched with her, I would also last less than a minute.


Control, son. Learn it. No sense in hooking up with a hottie if she's only going to be disappointed.
 
2014-07-09 12:12:20 PM  

JackieRabbit: devilEther: OtherLittleGuy: LIKES TO HAVE FREQUENT SEX BEFORE MATCHES...IS UNBEATEN WITH MOST MATCHES LASTING LESS THAN A MINUTE BY SUBMISSION

If I were matched with her, I would also last less than a minute.

Control, son. Learn it. No sense in hooking up with a hottie if she's only going to be disappointed.


I think you may need to work on your hypothesis a bit more... as there is this joke I know...
...goes like this...
Q: How does a real man know when the woman he's farking has an orgasm?
A: a *real man* doesn't care.
 
2014-07-09 12:26:37 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: LIKES TO HAVE FREQUENT SEX BEFORE MATCHES

[media.ufc.tv image 850x566]


IS UNBEATEN WITH MOST MATCHES LASTING LESS THAN A MINUTE BY SUBMISSION


Well sure, I mean, based on the superstition, then the woman's taking all of the man's energy, testosterone, and strength. It's only going to help a woman.
 
2014-07-09 01:06:55 PM  
score = score

conclusion - more sex is good.


and even if it's wrong, you'll likely be happier for trying
 
2014-07-09 07:15:27 PM  
As I see it, the players who were under a ban threw their matches so they could get back to the rumpy-pumpy.
 
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