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(Lancashire Evening Post)   Oh dear, it looks like Superman has fallen on hard times and is also a little confused   (lep.co.uk) divider line 31
    More: Amusing  
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10791 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Jul 2014 at 6:53 AM (10 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



31 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-07-09 06:55:16 AM
I'm a little confused what the Superman connection is.
 
2014-07-09 06:57:35 AM

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: I'm a little confused what the Superman connection is.


Bush = Phone Booth.  No, I didn't submit this.

Maybe he felt his Bat-a-Rang was a bit pale.
 
2014-07-09 06:58:41 AM
I'm guessing the blue shirt and red shorts?
 
2014-07-09 06:58:42 AM
Swaps clothes in a phone booth.

Beware her Staffie and Chihuahua.
 
2014-07-09 07:04:57 AM
Bush = Shrubbery of Solitude.
 
2014-07-09 07:08:54 AM
"I stood watching him fumble about in the bushes."

I bet you did!
 
2014-07-09 07:09:06 AM

Fear_and_Loathing: ThatGuyFromTheInternet: I'm a little confused what the Superman connection is.

Bush = Phone Booth.  No, I didn't submit this.

Maybe he felt his Bat-a-Rang was a bit pale.


Wouldn't an  American Werewolf in Londonreference make more sense?
 
2014-07-09 07:10:09 AM
"so I stood watching him fumble about..."
 
2014-07-09 07:10:35 AM

Fark Offten: "I stood watching him fumble about in the bushes."

I bet you did!


So there was a bustle in his/her hedgerow?
 
2014-07-09 07:14:25 AM
"A naked runner jumped into bushes to get dressed, after being seen by spotted in Leyland's Worden Park."

Having been seen by spotted, I think jumping into the bushes was the only logical thing for him to do.
 
2014-07-09 07:22:22 AM

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: Fark Offten: "I stood watching him fumble about in the bushes."

I bet you did!

So there was a bustle in his/her hedgerow?


Nice!
 
2014-07-09 07:24:35 AM
I don't know how you could go jogging naked. I'd bruise my knees.
 
2014-07-09 07:34:01 AM

jso2897: "A naked runner jumped into bushes to get dressed, after being seen by spotted in Leyland's Worden Park."

Having been seen by spotted, I think jumping into the bushes was the only logical thing for him to do.


A spotted what?
 
2014-07-09 07:37:12 AM

Fark Offten: jso2897: "A naked runner jumped into bushes to get dressed, after being seen by spotted in Leyland's Worden Park."

Having been seen by spotted, I think jumping into the bushes was the only logical thing for him to do.

A spotted what?


i.imgur.com
 
2014-07-09 07:43:02 AM

Roadogs: "so I stood watching him fumble about..."


Wicked Uncle Ernie?
 
2014-07-09 07:43:07 AM
"I stood and watched him run into the bushes, and then thought he might be performing a sex act.
"Knowing it was a dead-end on the other side of the river I thought he might run back, so I stood watching him fumble about in the bushes.

Oh, there's a pervert in this story alright.
 
2014-07-09 08:00:43 AM

jso2897: "A naked runner jumped into bushes to get dressed, after being seen by spotted in Leyland's Worden Park."

Having been seen by spotted, I think jumping into the bushes was the only logical thing for him to do.


Came here to point this out. I see by spotted my work is done.
 
2014-07-09 08:03:47 AM

Parthenogenetic: Fark Offten: jso2897: "A naked runner jumped into bushes to get dressed, after being seen by spotted in Leyland's Worden Park."

Having been seen by spotted, I think jumping into the bushes was the only logical thing for him to do.

A spotted what?

[i.imgur.com image 259x194]


www.tvsjohnhansen.com
 
2014-07-09 08:07:55 AM

jso2897: "A naked runner jumped into bushes to get dressed, after being seen by spotted in Leyland's Worden Park."

Having been seen by spotted, I think jumping into the bushes was the only logical thing for him to do.


So, that's where spotted dick cums from.
 
2014-07-09 08:14:03 AM
Hellava drug, crystal kryptonite. Probably started out small thinking "I'm Superman. I can handle it." Career at the newspaper is flatlining. No one's feeding his kickstarter campaign to "Rid the World of Evil". Old Lex swings by with a little vial of green gold. Tells Supe "This will fix them blues. Make it like your back home where you belong. Not stuck on a planet with a bunch of shaved, talking monkeys." Used to b $5 a day now it's a couple of hundred. He goes looking for armored car robber just so he can scoop up a few bills after thwarting the bad guys. Hell, courts are going to let them go anyways. Make it worth his time.

But you gotta be straight for the court dates. Can't get slipped up by a tricky defense attorney. "What is your name?" She asks. "Superman." What is your OTHER name? "The Man of Steel, biatch. We can do this all day. My Mastercard says Kal El. My TV Guide is addressed to Suppermansk."

"After you removed the defendant from his atomic biomechanical armor, did you read him his rights?"

"No ma'am. He was still combatant so I subdued him to make him compliant for the police who were on scene."

"Do you call putting a man in a coma for six weeks subduing?"

"Yes. He had just destroyed half the city and killed hundreds. I half punch to the side of the head was clearly the best procedure. As clear as the granny panties that you are wearing."

"Witness is not allowed to use his x-ray vision in the courtroom."

"I hope your taking Valtrex for those sores."

"Your Honor!"

Get out of court, a short flight to the fortress of solitude, a pipe full of glowing green. Use the heat vision to melt it to exactly 510 degrees and some sweet, sweet release. Stupid planet.
 
2014-07-09 08:17:32 AM
That lady was quite the busybody. Instead of calling the cops right away, she did a lot of observing, and still the first person she called was her partner.
 
2014-07-09 08:19:03 AM
I stood and watched him run into the bushes, and then thought he might be performing a sex act.

She makes it sound so theatrical!
 
2014-07-09 08:32:05 AM

Parthenogenetic: Fark Offten: jso2897: "A naked runner jumped into bushes to get dressed, after being seen by spotted in Leyland's Worden Park."

Having been seen by spotted, I think jumping into the bushes was the only logical thing for him to do.

A spotted what?

[i.imgur.com image 259x194]


"Shakes bulging spotted fist"
 
2014-07-09 09:01:28 AM
I thought it was Lois Lane that fell on hard times, and was all confused

blindscribblings.com
 
2014-07-09 09:29:43 AM
i44.tinypic.com
 
2014-07-09 09:38:56 AM
img.fark.net

"There he is.  That's superman"
 
2014-07-09 10:28:01 AM
Is this a reference to the Superman, Wonder Woman, Invisible Man joke?
 
2014-07-09 10:50:19 AM
 
2014-07-09 10:50:32 AM
He's still pretty feisty though.
starsmedia.ign.com
 
2014-07-09 11:36:35 AM
Hey Superman...

www.solidprinciples.com
 
2014-07-09 02:28:20 PM
 
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