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(New York Daily News)   Bicycle assaults NYC police officer   (nydailynews.com) divider line 72
    More: Ironic  
•       •       •

8247 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Jul 2014 at 4:36 PM (38 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



72 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-07-06 01:52:39 PM  
Radio Flyer?
 
2014-07-06 04:41:42 PM  
I'm not sure who to root for in this one?
 
2014-07-06 04:43:45 PM  
Bicyclists and gun owners are ganging up now?  Uh oh, if tattoos and foreskins form an alliance that'll mean the end of days.
 
2014-07-06 04:45:02 PM  
I want to throw my bicycle, I want to throw my bike. I want to throw my bicycle, I want to throw it where I like.
 
2014-07-06 04:45:27 PM  
Witnesses say he left in a huffy.
 
2014-07-06 04:46:23 PM  
The officer than called in the NYPD aviation unit which lit up the apartment building with a Dillon mini gun and dropped some snake and nape just to be sure.

The perp was later seen hurdling over the corpses of the innocent civilians killed in the strafing run....
 
2014-07-06 04:51:51 PM  
This thread is full of Schwinn.
 
2014-07-06 04:55:22 PM  
I bet the officer was rather Surly after that.
 
2014-07-06 04:57:49 PM  
What's got this cop in a huffy?
 
2014-07-06 04:58:23 PM  
I think that officer was just framed...
 
2014-07-06 04:59:47 PM  
It must have been quite a Trek to get it to the top of the building...
 
2014-07-06 05:00:25 PM  
The bike was then sodomized with a broken toilet plunger after being arrested.
 
2014-07-06 05:00:34 PM  
 
2014-07-06 05:00:34 PM  
I bet the cop Redlined it to the hospital.
 
2014-07-06 05:01:27 PM  
Cannondale!
 
2014-07-06 05:01:52 PM  

Enemabag Jones: The bike was then sodomized with a broken toilet plunger after being arrested.


The used plunger handle was hidden from invesitgators in a Hutch in the locker room.
 
2014-07-06 05:02:06 PM  
Stop with the puns and focus on whats important here people! will the bike be ok???
 
2014-07-06 05:02:54 PM  
If they think this is bad, try living in England.  Cops can't do a damn thing in certain parts of town at night, they're just outnumbered.

img.fark.net
 
2014-07-06 05:04:14 PM  
A Spokesman confirmed it was a 26 incher...
 
2014-07-06 05:07:36 PM  
Another failed HoverBike test...
 
2014-07-06 05:08:42 PM  
Police sketch of the incident

img1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-07-06 05:10:12 PM  
You guys are laughing now but getting hit with a bike is a Haroble experience.
 
2014-07-06 05:10:16 PM  

Pribar: Stop with the puns and focus on whats important here people! will the bike be ok???


And more importantly, how many times was the bike's dog actually shot?
 
2014-07-06 05:11:31 PM  
The falling bike opened a gash in the officer's head, but missed a direct hit, police said

Um... it hit him, but it wasn't a direct hit?
 
2014-07-06 05:16:30 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-07-06 05:21:38 PM  

Giltric: You guys are laughing now but getting hit with a bike is a Haroble experience.


I know! I cannondale with all the puns. It makes me get all huffy.
 
2014-07-06 05:26:50 PM  
When will we stop the cycle of violence?
 
2014-07-06 05:28:55 PM  
 
2014-07-06 05:30:08 PM  
"The bicycle was later booked into the evidence room with 41 gunshot wounds, believed to be self-inflicted."
 
2014-07-06 05:31:18 PM  

stirfrybry: Giltric: You guys are laughing now but getting hit with a bike is a Haroble experience.

I know! I cannondale with all the puns. It makes me get all huffy.


It'll derailleur whole day.
 
2014-07-06 05:33:56 PM  

cmunic8r99: The falling bike opened a gash in the officer's head, but missed a direct hit, police said

Um... it hit him, but it wasn't a direct hit?


It didn't sink his cruiser.

/got nothing
 
2014-07-06 05:37:17 PM  

cmunic8r99: The falling bike opened a gash in the officer's head, but missed a direct hit, police said

Um... it hit him, but it wasn't a direct hit?


Somebody got caught blading.
 
2014-07-06 05:41:56 PM  
I heard the bike, its mission complete, has been retired.
 
2014-07-06 05:41:59 PM  
See, if he had worn a bike helmet, the bike wouldn't have caused that gash.
 
2014-07-06 05:50:13 PM  
Soon the cops are going to carry Specialized equipment for this.

Or maybe they will have Felt lined helmets.

Seriously, this is a Giant problem to solve.
 
2014-07-06 05:53:35 PM  
I blame the waning popularity of baseball among inner-city youth for this.

See, if there were baseball cards in the spokes, he would have heard the bike coming.
 
2014-07-06 05:55:20 PM  
If only a good guy with a bike had been there, this tragedy wouldn't have happened.

/always keep your bicycles loaded.
 
2014-07-06 05:58:25 PM  
 
2014-07-06 05:58:58 PM  

Enemabag Jones: The bike was then sodomized with a broken toilet plunger after being arrested.


That was a Barbie bike.  Damned savages sodomizing a Barbie bike!
 
2014-07-06 06:04:46 PM  
Who throws a bike?  Honestly.
 
2014-07-06 06:07:13 PM  
Slow down y'all. I'm trying to come up to 10 speeds in the thread.
 
2014-07-06 06:13:00 PM  
Was he wearing his helmet?
 
2014-07-06 06:15:17 PM  

UsikFark: cmunic8r99: The falling bike opened a gash in the officer's head, but missed a direct hit, police said

Um... it hit him, but it wasn't a direct hit?

Somebody got caught blading.


He should have took lessons from an expert, like this guy:
 
2014-07-06 06:17:21 PM  
The gashed officer became bike furious.
 
2014-07-06 06:17:29 PM  

Latinwolf: UsikFark: cmunic8r99: The falling bike opened a gash in the officer's head, but missed a direct hit, police said

Um... it hit him, but it wasn't a direct hit?

Somebody got caught blading.

He should have took lessons from an expert, like this guy:


upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-07-06 06:17:36 PM  
Backup arrived and gunfire broke out. It has been reported 379 shots where fired at the bicycle and three met the target. Multiple officers also tasered the bicycle for failing to comply with officers orders.
 
2014-07-06 06:24:23 PM  
Bicycle tazed into compliance

/worst ironic tag ever?
 
2014-07-06 06:29:32 PM  

real_headhoncho: Was he wearing his helmet?


I dunno, but that question rings a Bell...
 
2014-07-06 06:30:12 PM  
"It was not immediately clear if the bike-tossing culprit had been arrested, police said."

How do the police not know?
 
2014-07-06 06:38:54 PM  

donnielove: "It was not immediately clear if the bike-tossing culprit had been arrested, police said."

How do the police not know?


They arrested several people because *reasons* and are deciding which ones to charge?
 
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