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(Chicago Trib)   The US is now the world's biggest oil producer, meaning it may have to invade itself at some point in the future   (chicagotribune.com) divider line 131
    More: Ironic, U.S., oil producers, International Energy Agency, shale, Bank of America, economic recovery, crude oil  
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3839 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Jul 2014 at 10:14 PM (15 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



131 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-07-04 08:06:24 PM  
Awesome point subbs.

I for one, look forward to the US Army engaging with tea party Kooks defending the oil fields from the price drop after Obama's solar companies take off.

noarmycanstopanidea.com
(Just a thought about what we're up against)
 
2014-07-04 08:36:53 PM  
And the invasion would pay for itself!!!
 
2014-07-04 08:42:35 PM  
We'll welcome ourselves as liberators.

Flowers and candy.
 
2014-07-04 08:42:51 PM  
Don't worry, my rep in congress is doing all she can to stop further oil production here.
 
2014-07-04 08:52:44 PM  
Oh subby, you make it sound so simple.
 
2014-07-04 08:59:09 PM  
Oddly, 89 is still f*ck you cause that's why a gallon.  For freedom.
 
2014-07-04 09:09:09 PM  
So ... should I start digging up my backyard, or just sell the rights to the highest bidder?
 
2014-07-04 09:15:02 PM  
Is this guy available?

img.fark.net
 
2014-07-04 09:24:08 PM  
So the price per gallon should drop to pre-2000 prices, right?

Right...?
 
2014-07-04 09:31:44 PM  
Do we get to join OPEC?
 
2014-07-04 09:31:47 PM  

Shostie: So the price per gallon should drop to pre-2000 prices, right?

Right...?


I recall being assured that would be the case

/apparently we're still just getting the drilling
 
2014-07-04 09:46:17 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Shostie: So the price per gallon should drop to pre-2000 prices, right?

Right...?

I recall being assured that would be the case

/apparently we're still just getting the drilling


I thought drill baby drill was going to drop gas prices to $.01 a gallon.
 
2014-07-04 09:47:30 PM  
You're going to hate yourselves for your freedoms.
 
2014-07-04 10:16:47 PM  

jchic: I thought drill baby drill was going to drop gas prices to $.01 a gallon.


Naw, the plan was always to use up OTHER people's oil first when it's cheap, then switch back to our own to help maintain ourselves as an economic power once places like Saudi Arabia were exhausted.
 
2014-07-04 10:17:12 PM  
I'm sure it will only take six weeks, at most six months.
 
2014-07-04 10:20:56 PM  

OtherBrotherDarryl: Do we get to join OPEC?


That would be even better trolling than if the USMNT had won the World Cup.
 
2014-07-04 10:21:35 PM  
I guess we will be invading our country, killing our leaders, and converting them to Christianity soon... or is that happening already?!
 
2014-07-04 10:23:40 PM  
Can we leave the Middle East now? We don't need them anymore. :-(
 
2014-07-04 10:24:18 PM  
it already has.

i1207.photobucket.com
 
2014-07-04 10:26:17 PM  
"Will remain" as in already was #1.  MURICA
 
2014-07-04 10:26:51 PM  
Thank you President Bush. You continue to show us how incompetent OBamBam is.... Wait.
 
2014-07-04 10:27:56 PM  
Thanks Obama.
 
2014-07-04 10:28:01 PM  
We need to fight ourselves here so we don't have to fight ourselves here.
 
2014-07-04 10:29:33 PM  
Uh, I'm Russia produces oil and they're almost twice our size.
 
2014-07-04 10:34:49 PM  
Didn't we already invaded ourselves back in the 1860's, and already settled stuff like this?

I sure hope so, I don't feel like another civil war.
 
2014-07-04 10:36:57 PM  
Sadly, being the largest producer doesn't really translate into good things for our energy supply domestically.

You'd think it would but the kind of oil we produce in the US isn't the kind our refineries can handle. So we can't make gas or other products from it, so it all ends up being shipped overseas to refiners who can do something with it. Domestic refineries won't retool because it's expensive and they just import it, or more accurately they buy futures contracts for the kind they need and don't care where it actually comes from.
 
2014-07-04 10:38:08 PM  

lack of warmth: Didn't we already invaded ourselves back in the 1860's, and already settled stuff like this?


We haven't settled sh*t. Have you not noticed the massive political polarization coming from backwater areas of the country?
 
2014-07-04 10:39:02 PM  
Well, this means Congress will finally approve building new schools, bridges and dams around here.
 
2014-07-04 10:40:02 PM  

bunner: Oddly, 89 is still f*ck you cause that's why a gallon.  For freedom.


Oddly the new methods cost more than the old ones. It was no secret that the oil was there, the wells didn't dry up it just became too expensive to pull it out of the ground when oil was selling at $12 a barrel (or whatever). The days of oil gushers are pretty much over and the cheap oil relied on the pressure underground to extract it. Once that pressure was gone a lot of the wells were capped because it was cheaper to go find a new gusher than to start pumping it out out of rock formations that had trapped the oil in a much more scattered fashion instead of the big "Pools" that produced the cheap oil.

Once it became more expensive per barrel there was a big push to find new ways to get the oil out of those capped wells and Fracking was born.
 
2014-07-04 10:44:59 PM  

bdub77: lack of warmth: Didn't we already invaded ourselves back in the 1860's, and already settled stuff like this?

We haven't settled sh*t. Have you not noticed the massive political polarization coming from backwater areas of the country?


You can't be that old to still be butt hurt about that old war, but you are very capable of not understanding history.
 
2014-07-04 10:47:20 PM  
We could invade Canada, but their gas comes in liters, I'm not sure if that would fit in my car.
 
2014-07-04 10:49:42 PM  
www.minnpost.com

Well, first off... Gasoline has come back to lower prices. It's just that your dollar took a 30% hit in the 00s.

Second, we are descending into a rent-state, where the oligarchic government doesn't have to care about the improvement of the masses because it'll get enough to operate from selling stuff and tax farming.
 
2014-07-04 10:52:21 PM  
Are we going to start kicking American Injuns off their land the moment they stop to take a shiat?
 
2014-07-04 10:56:26 PM  
I'm still trying to figure out how anyone with an IQ north of room temperature can possibly be OK with the entire process of fracking.

You're taking unregulated toxic chemicals, mixing them with water, slamming them into the ground to blow up huge areas, and sucking out the oil that was there.

You're left with a shiat-ton of toxic crap *where our drinking water is* and gazillions of *giant, unmapped, someday sinkholes* and unregulated cavers of doom that would kill anyone that happens across them not in a a full-on FEMA/CDC suit. And then leaving without a word when the extraction is complete.

...


...


Isn't this what the invading aliens were purported to do in the movie 'Independence Day'?

How is this OK?


Oh, wait....Free Market Economy and why do I hate America. farking right wing.
 
2014-07-04 10:56:53 PM  
Airstrikes on North Dakota.   Soften them up before the invasion, plus we have lots of extra bombs so we can bomb them till we run out and then more money for the bomb makers.  Win Win.
 
2014-07-04 10:58:53 PM  

lack of warmth: bdub77: lack of warmth: Didn't we already invaded ourselves back in the 1860's, and already settled stuff like this?

We haven't settled sh*t. Have you not noticed the massive political polarization coming from backwater areas of the country?

You can't be that old to still be butt hurt about that old war, but you are very capable of not understanding history.


So what, the traitor portions of the country aren't still trying to destroy the country? Seems to me they are. Because they're the TRUE patriots. The racist traitors of the South.
 
2014-07-04 11:01:30 PM  
So americans can stop including Canada whenever they talk about United States energy independance?
 
2014-07-04 11:03:54 PM  
I "invade myself" sometimes, too. Wink wink, nudge nudge.
 
2014-07-04 11:04:05 PM  

rev. dave: Airstrikes on North Dakota.   Soften them up before the invasion, plus we have lots of extra bombs so we can bomb them till we run out and then more money for the bomb makers.  Win Win.


they have an airbase and nukes, not sure this is a good plan.
 
2014-07-04 11:05:30 PM  
More importantly, where are we going to park the aircraft carrier for the "Mission Accomplished" photo op?
 
2014-07-04 11:06:22 PM  

xaks: I'm still trying to figure out how anyone with an IQ north of room temperature can possibly be OK with the entire process of fracking.


Money, money, money, fark everything else.
 
2014-07-04 11:12:48 PM  

bdub77: lack of warmth: Didn't we already invaded ourselves back in the 1860's, and already settled stuff like this?

We haven't settled sh*t. Have you not noticed the massive political polarization coming from backwater areas of the country?


I'm currently in Mississippi from Illinois visiting the in-laws and note the differences. The amount of debt in Cook County (Chicago) vs MS is a staggering number and the taxes show the difference. Cook County and the taxing bodies in it are $140Billion in debt and the hundreds of billions that the state is behind hasn't even been accounted into that. Talk of such things are not found in MS to this extent.

I find that the "backwater" areas of the country are actually the way things need to be ran instead of the way it is ran in places like Chicago where it is a one-party system of Democrats running up a tab that may end up bankrupting the state retirement system and causing many large companies such as Caterpillar, John Deere, Boeing, ADM, State Farm to leave.

Sure, a lot of stuff is nicer back in IL, but apparently we can't actually pay for it. It is like looking at the houses in the nicer neighborhoods and saying, "Wow! Wouldn't it be nice to live there." Then looking inside and not seeing much furniture because all of their income is tied up in the mortgage payment.
 
2014-07-04 11:16:16 PM  

lack of warmth: bdub77: lack of warmth: Didn't we already invaded ourselves back in the 1860's, and already settled stuff like this?

We haven't settled sh*t. Have you not noticed the massive political polarization coming from backwater areas of the country?

You can't be that old to still be butt hurt about that old war, but you are very capable of not understanding history.

I usually never find myself agreeing with bdud but are you actually suggesting that there aren't people all over the south, of all ages that still bear a grudge from "The War of Northern Aggression" or to us of the non-sisterfarking persuasion the Civil War? Because if you are then you must not live here or have met anyone who does.
 
2014-07-04 11:22:32 PM  
We're extracting craploads of shale oil, not sweet crude. Shale oil is the nastiest, most ecologically harmful oil that you can scrape from the ground. And we're happy about this? Why, of course we are. We're stupid.

This is like a drunk guy tapping into a bar's drip dray thinking that he's struck gold.
 
2014-07-04 11:27:40 PM  

ScaryBottles: I usually never find myself agreeing with bdud but are you actually suggesting that there aren't people all over the south, of all ages that still bear a grudge from "The War of Northern Aggression" or to us of the non-sisterfarking persuasion the Civil War? Because if you are then you must not live here or have met anyone who does.


I lived in South Carolina for a year and the grudge doesn't come from losing the war, it comes from the reformation and how they were treated by the north (under codified laws) as second class citizens for decades, something that continues to an extent even today (as evidenced by your sisterfarking comment).

They had and still have their issues but when you denigrate them as a group you're no better than the worst bigots amongst them.
 
2014-07-04 11:28:02 PM  

Demonrats: bdub77: lack of warmth: Didn't we already invaded ourselves back in the 1860's, and already settled stuff like this?

We haven't settled sh*t. Have you not noticed the massive political polarization coming from backwater areas of the country?

I'm currently in Mississippi from Illinois visiting the in-laws and note the differences. The amount of debt in Cook County (Chicago) vs MS is a staggering number and the taxes show the difference. Cook County and the taxing bodies in it are $140Billion in debt and the hundreds of billions that the state is behind hasn't even been accounted into that. Talk of such things are not found in MS to this extent.

I find that the "backwater" areas of the country are actually the way things need to be ran instead of the way it is ran in places like Chicago where it is a one-party system of Democrats running up a ....


16. Illinois
> Median household income:
 $55,137
> Population: 12,875,255 (5th highest)
> Unemployment rate: 8.9% (10th highest)
> Pct. below poverty line: 14.7% (tied-24th lowest)
The percentage of Illinois residents relying on food stamps was below the national rate in 2012. SImilarly, the poverty rate in the state was slightly less than nationwide. Despite these signs of prosperity, Illinois' unemployment rate of 8.9% was among the 10 worst in the country last year.
50. Mississippi
> Median household income:
 $37,095
> Population: 2,984,926 (20th lowest)
> Unemployment rate: 9.2% (6th highest)
> Pct. below poverty line: 24.2% (the highest)
In Mississippi, about one in five households depended on food stamps last year, second only to Oregon. The state's poverty rate was 24.2%, the highest in the nation by more than three percentage points. Like many of America's poorest states, the median household income in Mississippi has declined considerably since 2008, when it was just over $40,000. Fewer households earned over $200,000 last year, proportionally, than any other state except West Virginia. In addition to poverty, income inequality was also extremely severe in Mississippi, ranking behind only New York and Connecticut.
Read more:  http://247wallst.com/special-report/2013/09/19/americas-richest-and-p o orest-states/#ixzz36YpkANr7

Yeah, I'll take IL rather than last-in-the-nation-but-our-taxes-are-low Mississippi. Sometimes the right thing to do is to borrow a few bucks for a nice interview suit rather than show up wearing a burlap sack with your balls hanging out. In other news, what the hell is up with Oregoneans starving?
 
2014-07-04 11:28:33 PM  

Firethorn: jchic: I thought drill baby drill was going to drop gas prices to $.01 a gallon.

Naw, the plan was always to use up OTHER people's oil first when it's cheap, then switch back to our own to help maintain ourselves as an economic power once places like Saudi Arabia were exhausted.


That would have been the smart play. But NOPE! Looks like we're going all in on this one. Drink it down to the last drop!
 
2014-07-04 11:35:28 PM  

Demonrats: bdub77: lack of warmth: Didn't we already invaded ourselves back in the 1860's, and already settled stuff like this?

We haven't settled sh*t. Have you not noticed the massive political polarization coming from backwater areas of the country?

I'm currently in Mississippi from Illinois visiting the in-laws and note the differences. The amount of debt in Cook County (Chicago) vs MS is a staggering number and the taxes show the difference. Cook County and the taxing bodies in it are $140Billion in debt and the hundreds of billions that the state is behind hasn't even been accounted into that. Talk of such things are not found in MS to this extent.

I find that the "backwater" areas of the country are actually the way things need to be ran instead of the way it is ran in places like Chicago where it is a one-party system of Democrats running up a tab that may end up bankrupting the state retirement system and causing many large companies such as Caterpillar, John Deere, Boeing, ADM, State Farm to leave.

Sure, a lot of stuff is nicer back in IL, but apparently we can't actually pay for it. It is like looking at the houses in the nicer neighborhoods and saying, "Wow! Wouldn't it be nice to live there." Then looking inside and not seeing much furniture because all of their income is tied up in the mortgage payment.


Maybe if you hadn't voted in people who have vowed to slash government down to cops and roads so they could give tax breaks to billionaires you wouldn't have to look longingly at the bright lights of chi town. You're essentially saying you shouldn't have this great stuff because you can't afford it. But you can't afford because you and your teabagger buddies keep telling yourselves and anyone dumb enough to listen that "the profits will trickle down any day now" all we have to do is cut taxes for rich assholes..... again.

Do you not see how you're talking out both sides of your face. On the one hand you lament your craphole state's inability to provide essential services comparable to those available in Illinois while you simultaneously do everything you can to make sure they can't. And somehow this is the democratic party's fault how does that one work broham? No the reality is your state sucks because the people running it have clue what they're doing and because its populated by people every bit as uninformed and unrealistic as you are who keep voting for the same bunch of stupid clowns. But if it makes you feel any better I bet it would more fun to have a beer with them than Hillary so you have that. I guess.
 
2014-07-04 11:36:48 PM  
That can't be right. I've been assured by numerous Fark Independentstm that Obama is hellbent on destroying the US oil and gas industry.
 
2014-07-04 11:37:27 PM  

Gyrfalcon: More importantly, where are we going to park the aircraft carrier for the "Mission Accomplished" photo op?



Lake Michigan.
That way when it'll be available right away for counter-insurgency missions in Detroit.
 
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