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(Tampa Bay Online)   Thanks to all of you overachieving, overly competitive high school students who purposely took classes to pad your GPA: You and your hot-headed parents are causing more and more schools to get rid of class valedictorians and salutatorians   (tbo.com) divider line 125
    More: Stupid, valedictorians, academic performance, salutatorians, Advanced Placement, Pasco County, school boards, ranking member, GPA  
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4928 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Jul 2014 at 11:29 PM (11 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-07-02 12:43:54 AM

maram500: Bullseyed: If you didn't take STEM ap classes, you shouldn't be eligible for any class ranking.

We f***ing get it already. STEM is great. STEM is the only thing anyone ever needs.

You know what else we need? People that can understand how STEM has evolved (history). How STEM has affected people on the macro (sociology) and micro (psychology) levels. How STEM applies to governments (political science). And on and f***ing on.

STEM is great if the only thing you want are factory drones.


i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-07-02 12:45:34 AM
I can't decide how to phrase my humblebrag so let me just say that I got on the stage, punched the stupid Dean right in his stupid face before showering the first two rows (kids last names "A" through "C") with urine which I had built up drinking my 40oz out of a paper bag during the ceremony. And that was BEFORE my validictorian speech, in which all I did was talk about punching the Dean in the face and then apologizing to Marcia Dalenti who accidentally got splashed with pee even though I really tried limiting it to the first two rows only but that initial burst was hard to suppress. Plus I had a crush on her.
 
2014-07-02 12:46:26 AM
Don't smome the monkey.
 
2014-07-02 12:47:51 AM

maram500: Bullseyed: If you didn't take STEM ap classes, you shouldn't be eligible for any class ranking.

We f***ing get it already. STEM is great. STEM is the only thing anyone ever needs.

You know what else we need? People that can understand how STEM has evolved (history). How STEM has affected people on the macro (sociology) and micro (psychology) levels. How STEM applies to governments (political science). And on and f***ing on.

STEM is great if the only thing you want are factory drones.


Oh come one, STEM produces a lot more than factory drones, at least if done correctly.  But you're right about the rest.
 
2014-07-02 12:48:01 AM

BalugaJoe: Nipple size.


Yes?  What about it?
img.fark.net
 
2014-07-02 12:48:02 AM

420Gabriel: baconbeard: When I went to school, the smart kids were the ones who got a 'B' average while taking physics, math, and chemistry without doing any homework, not the ones who did 30 hours extra a week in English Lit and biology to get 'A's'

I was the guy acing the tests and having people cheat off me, even though I did no homework and no studying and was high.

Colleges should base entry more on intelligence than on knowledge. Make an IQ minimum, not a gpa minimum. Our colleges are filled with average to below average intelligence kids who had parents that pushed them really hard.


Yeah except drive beats talent every time. The world is full of underachieving 'smart people' who are worse off than 'dumber people' with drive and determination. See also; professional athletes, etc. How well do you think their sports teams would do if admissions were based on an IQ test? Not saying all athletes aren't smart, some are just in non-traditional ways.
 
2014-07-02 12:50:58 AM

420Gabriel: baconbeard: When I went to school, the smart kids were the ones who got a 'B' average while taking physics, math, and chemistry without doing any homework, not the ones who did 30 hours extra a week in English Lit and biology to get 'A's'

I was the guy acing the tests and having people cheat off me, even though I did no homework and no studying and was high.

Colleges should base entry more on intelligence than on knowledge. Make an IQ minimum, not a gpa minimum. Our colleges are filled with average to below average intelligence kids who had parents that pushed them really hard.


Same ... I used to post up my homework each night on my website for everyone else to use.  I just wanted the world to burn.  High school academia was an absolute joke. If you had even an ounce of intelligence, you just studied to pass the AP exams, did enough homework to pass, and learn how to game what teachers wanted you to turn in.  I spent most my time sleeping in class, smoking pot behind the gym, and learning how to game the SAT/ACT.

Graduated 8/196, only because I decided against taking AP English Lit senior year in favor of sleeping through normal Senior Lit.  On the plus side, taking almost exclusively AP courses junior and senior year allowed me to enter college one quarter shy of junior hours.
 
2014-07-02 12:51:41 AM
The smartest kids are rarely the valedictorians. The valedictorians at my school:

One year: cheated his way to the top and students at graduation stood and turned their backs when he spoke at graduation.
One year: took only 1 semester of PE freshmen year, saved the other semester for 2nd semester senior year since 2nd semester senior year doesn't count for class rankings.
One year: Got the band director to offer "honors" band and gave the student a 5.0 in band period.

See the trend here? Not only that, but athletes can never be ranked number one because their sport period isn't weighted. And there have been some flipping smart athletes at this school.

Grades tell me very little about you except that you are good at making a high school teacher happy. Or your lawyer parent scared a teacher into giving you an A- when you deserved a B+.
 
2014-07-02 12:52:17 AM
GrumpyCatGood.jpg
 
2014-07-02 12:55:41 AM

davidt: The smartest kids are rarely the valedictorians. The valedictorians at my school:

One year: cheated his way to the top and students at graduation stood and turned their backs when he spoke at graduation.
One year: took only 1 semester of PE freshmen year, saved the other semester for 2nd semester senior year since 2nd semester senior year doesn't count for class rankings.
One year: Got the band director to offer "honors" band and gave the student a 5.0 in band period.

See the trend here? Not only that, but athletes can never be ranked number one because their sport period isn't weighted. And there have been some flipping smart athletes at this school.

Grades tell me very little about you except that you are good at making a high school teacher happy. Or your lawyer parent scared a teacher into giving you an A- when you deserved a B+.


What the f*ck is a sport period? Is this a public school thing? Serious, private school kid here and we we required to take 8 classes every semester from 7:55am to 2:40pm, all four years with no 'free' periods.
 
2014-07-02 01:04:04 AM

DoctorWhat: maram500: Bullseyed: If you didn't take STEM ap classes, you shouldn't be eligible for any class ranking.

We f***ing get it already. STEM is great. STEM is the only thing anyone ever needs.

You know what else we need? People that can understand how STEM has evolved (history). How STEM has affected people on the macro (sociology) and micro (psychology) levels. How STEM applies to governments (political science). And on and f***ing on.

STEM is great if the only thing you want are factory drones.

Oh come one, STEM produces a lot more than factory drones, at least if done correctly.  But you're right about the rest.


If done correctly, you get people than can only work in a few core industries. STEM produces people who would be most useful in factories--people who design stuff to be manufacured, who research new technology to be manufactured, who can keep the books straight in the factory's finance department, and so forth.

I might have been a touch hyperbolic in my original statement, but holy crap, people put too much emphasis on STEM. Of course, if anyone studied things like political science, history, and sociology, they'd be able to tell you how badly we keep gettinscrewed over by everyone.
 
2014-07-02 01:04:21 AM

OtherLittleGuy: Mugato:  angry parents paying a visit to the superintendent when a son or daughter lost out, sometimes by hundredths of a percentage point.

Those parents need a good coont punch.

No virtual ties? Co-valedictorians?

Or just have it resolved by PKs or the Octagon.


PKs? Are you some sort of socialist?

This is America. We go to sudden death. The Octagon works as well.
 
2014-07-02 01:07:22 AM

seadoo2006: davidt: The smartest kids are rarely the valedictorians. The valedictorians at my school:

One year: cheated his way to the top and students at graduation stood and turned their backs when he spoke at graduation.
One year: took only 1 semester of PE freshmen year, saved the other semester for 2nd semester senior year since 2nd semester senior year doesn't count for class rankings.
One year: Got the band director to offer "honors" band and gave the student a 5.0 in band period.

See the trend here? Not only that, but athletes can never be ranked number one because their sport period isn't weighted. And there have been some flipping smart athletes at this school.

Grades tell me very little about you except that you are good at making a high school teacher happy. Or your lawyer parent scared a teacher into giving you an A- when you deserved a B+.

What the f*ck is a sport period? Is this a public school thing? Serious, private school kid here and we we required to take 8 classes every semester from 7:55am to 2:40pm, all four years with no 'free' periods.


Closest thing I can think of was weight training in my school. You didn't have to be an athlete to take it (just finished normal PE credits), but everyone was an athlete. Not gonna lie, I didn't mind the A I got, but I didn't even care about that. I *needed* to get jacked for sports and girls. Besides the grading was done on an improvement scale, not total weight or anything. You could try and sandbag your max weight, but the teacher(s) were coaches and spent a ton of time in the weightroom in the offseason. Between them seeing you lift and asking your coach, they could be huge assholes if you tried that.

That said, I'd have taken the class even if it was just a credit with no grade. I was floating between top 10% and top 20%. I knew I wasn't going to get a merit scholarship or hit valedictorian, so I just focused on getting decent grades and acing the AP tests. It worked out for me. I hit college as a sophomore, which let me ride a bit on how many credit hours I needed to take and got me out of almost all Friday classes.

/work smarter not harder kids
 
2014-07-02 01:07:34 AM

abmoraz: Thank god.  Valedictorians and Salutatorian speeches are pointless drivel.  The kids that are in that position are already disliked by most of their high school peers for throwing the curve or being "geeks".  Those kids don't want to sit there and listen to them give a speech any more than most of them want to give it.  Just let it die.  Give the kids their diplomas and move on.  Everyone is SUPPOSED to graduate.  You shouldn't get huge ceremonies for things you are supposed to do.  "I paid my taxes!  Rent out the dance hall and listen to my speech!"  "Joey brushed his teeth!  Give him a framed plaque!"  "Mary showed up on time to work the entire year!  We're having a gala in her honor!"

I was supposed to be Salutatorian for my HS graduation.  I told the staff and the National Honor Society advisor* to pick someone else, I wasn't going to graduation, more or less giving a speech to 115 other kids I didn't really like for a ceremony that means nothing.  My parents eventually made me attend, to which I sat there, took my fake diploma**, and promptly left.  Didn't stay for pictures or anything.

I was already enrolled in college summer semester and left 2 weeks before HS graduation.  They made me come back for that crap on a Saturday when I would've much rather been partying.

* Not sure why the NHS lady was involved in setting up graduation ceremonies, but she already hated me because I turned down joining NHS both Junior and Senior year.  Another pointless "society" for College Application padding.
** They didn't give out diplomas at graduation (which I guess is standard practice) so that they could "withhold" them if anyone tried to prank the ceremony (or had outstanding library book fines).  You had to pick them up the following week at the school.  I think mine is still there.  20yr reunion is in 3 weeks.  If I was going, I'd probably see if they still had it.

/Parents knew better than to ask if I was going to my college graduation.
//Spent it at a bar getting drunk with my friends


Not that I disagree with any of your points, but the practice at pubic speaking wouldn't be a bad thing.
 
2014-07-02 01:19:09 AM
I was in a small town with something like 18 in our graduating class. The valedictorian wasn't based on the highest grades, but on a vote by the students.

When the subject came up, one girl in our class really wanted it. I jokingly suggested, "I'll be valdeictorian!"

She turned to me and coldly said, "Don't you think the valedictorian should be the person with the highest grades?"

I found this funny because I did well in math and sciences and she did better (but not that much better) in the fluffy stuff.

Anyway, it came down to a vote for three of us (two girls and me) and I won. She was a bit upset.

Funny thing is that when the final grades finally came out, I was first and she was fourth.

I made my speech short - three minutes - I included a few trite things and some nice words to my classmates and teachers. I still had memories of my sister's graduation when a gentleman addressed the students (he wasn't the valedictorian, but a former principal) and gave a 45-minute speech. It was boring and horrible.

Bottom line, valedictorian means NOTHING. I didn't even tell my family when I was voted to be that person. I think my sister came home a week later and she was very proud. I just shrugged my shoulders.
 
2014-07-02 01:22:09 AM
This is all interesting to me, because I am a Gifted Class Dropout.  Not even due my natural misanthropy, but I couldn't see myself busting my hump to always prove my near genius IQ as the others seemed to be doing.  Besides, I totally suck at math.  I certainly didn't want to be Saluta-or Valedictorian, and have to make what always sounded like fakey speeches to me.

There was a brother and sister at one school who always made Perfect Attendance every year through their run at school.  Their mother was one of the teachers, and made sure they were in school, sick or not.  I believe those kids were responsible for other kids not making P.A. because of whatever Andromeda Strain they occasionally infected the school with.

High Achievement just wasn't that attractive to me.  But your milage may vary.
 
2014-07-02 01:33:15 AM
Who the fark can remember high school?
 
2014-07-02 01:38:53 AM

roughridersfan: Bottom line, valedictorian means NOTHING. I


The only real thing it gives you in my experience was usually a certain amount of money for college. Most colleges I looked at at least had a minimal amount of scholarship money awarded to anyone who was a valedictorian. I know some school waived a good chunk of tuition and fees for it.
 
2014-07-02 01:39:54 AM
Last month, I went to my friends' kid's HS graduation.  Every kid with a 4.0 GPA was named valedictorian.  There were fourteen.

That was an agonizingly long ceremony.
 
2014-07-02 01:41:27 AM

hasty ambush: Boo_Guy: hasty ambush: They also need to get rid of Cheerleading. The conflicts that happen when somebodies daughter is not of the first squad are akin to open warfare. Now days every girl who goes out for cheerleading makes the team (to avoid lawsuits) but they have different squads.

This is just crazy talk,  how else would we be able to stare at firm young teens naughty areas and have everyone be ok with it if we didn't have cheerleading.

Crazy talk

You do realize the fat chicks also get to be cheerleaders now don't you.


Fat chicks give better head
 
2014-07-02 01:49:46 AM
UT-Austin gave zobear jr., a hard time b/c she didn't include her class rank.  Her HS class had 26 people in it.  The HS guidance counselor had to send a few snail mails on letterhead explaining that they didn't assign class rank.
 
2014-07-02 01:50:18 AM
s1.postimg.org
 
2014-07-02 01:50:31 AM
Good.  Let the kids make it to adulthood without permanently burning themselves out, working themselves into life-long cynicism, and ruining relationships in the name of something no one is going to give a damn about come the fall semester.
 
2014-07-02 01:53:05 AM

abmoraz: Thank god.  Valedictorians and Salutatorian speeches are pointless drivel.  The kids that are in that position are already disliked by most of their high school peers for throwing the curve or being "geeks".  Those kids don't want to sit there and listen to them give a speech any more than most of them want to give it.  Just let it die.  Give the kids their diplomas and move on.  Everyone is SUPPOSED to graduate.  You shouldn't get huge ceremonies for things you are supposed to do.  "I paid my taxes!  Rent out the dance hall and listen to my speech!"  "Joey brushed his teeth!  Give him a framed plaque!"  "Mary showed up on time to work the entire year!  We're having a gala in her honor!"

I was supposed to be Salutatorian for my HS graduation.  I told the staff and the National Honor Society advisor* to pick someone else, I wasn't going to graduation, more or less giving a speech to 115 other kids I didn't really like for a ceremony that means nothing.  My parents eventually made me attend, to which I sat there, took my fake diploma**, and promptly left.  Didn't stay for pictures or anything.

I was already enrolled in college summer semester and left 2 weeks before HS graduation.  They made me come back for that crap on a Saturday when I would've much rather been partying.

* Not sure why the NHS lady was involved in setting up graduation ceremonies, but she already hated me because I turned down joining NHS both Junior and Senior year.  Another pointless "society" for College Application padding.
** They didn't give out diplomas at graduation (which I guess is standard practice) so that they could "withhold" them if anyone tried to prank the ceremony (or had outstanding library book fines).  You had to pick them up the following week at the school.  I think mine is still there.  20yr reunion is in 3 weeks.  If I was going, I'd probably see if they still had it.

/Parents knew better than to ask if I was going to my college graduation.
//Spent it at a bar getting drunk with my friends


You don't sound bitter, at all
 
2014-07-02 01:54:03 AM

albatros183: well never mind what I actually wanted to say, no wonder fark is slowly failing.

May be my last post


Heh, the last year or so I've thought the same thing, that fark is slowly but surely dying off. Wow, I'm getting old... Seems like just yesterday fark was new and fresh and I was watching the pickle incident unfold. Man, good times, good memories, good laughs. Oh well, everything has an end. Maybe HPZ can breath some fresh air in fark by humping a giant cone for us.
 
2014-07-02 01:55:45 AM
Around here, just heard about some girl who is graduating with a 4.6 GPA.

Think about that.

4.6 out of 4.0

Kids these days don't need to buy a home. Just ride around in a big balloon the rest of their lives filled with inflated grades.  Just watch out for the pizza-delivery drones and the police helicopters, OK?
 
2014-07-02 01:55:49 AM
I was desperate to get out of High School & took several Community College courses to get out early.

After three years of AP English, I took "English 1A" at the CC to satisfy my Senior English requirements.

After starting the class, I remember going back to my High School counselor several times to confirm that this class would satisfy the requirements. It was easier than any English class I'd had in High School or Junior High.

It was an eye-opening experience.
 
2014-07-02 01:56:38 AM

stuffy: So 3 shop classes a bit much?


Why did you think it would be easy?
 
2014-07-02 01:57:56 AM

marcre3363: I was desperate to get out of High School & took several Community College courses to get out early.

After three years of AP English, I took "English 1A" at the CC to satisfy my Senior English requirements.

After starting the class, I remember going back to my High School counselor several times to confirm that this class would satisfy the requirements. It was easier than any English class I'd had in High School or Junior High.

It was an eye-opening experience.


Which AP English class did you fail?
 
2014-07-02 02:29:30 AM

redmid17: marcre3363: I was desperate to get out of High School & took several Community College courses to get out early.

After three years of AP English, I took "English 1A" at the CC to satisfy my Senior English requirements.

After starting the class, I remember going back to my High School counselor several times to confirm that this class would satisfy the requirements. It was easier than any English class I'd had in High School or Junior High.

It was an eye-opening experience.

Which AP English class did you fail?


Which reading comprehension class did you fail?
 
2014-07-02 02:29:36 AM

URAPNIS: I got a Participation Ribbon when I graduated high school.


I got out of town.

buh-bye.
 
2014-07-02 02:35:47 AM

marcre3363: redmid17: marcre3363: I was desperate to get out of High School & took several Community College courses to get out early.

After three years of AP English, I took "English 1A" at the CC to satisfy my Senior English requirements.

After starting the class, I remember going back to my High School counselor several times to confirm that this class would satisfy the requirements. It was easier than any English class I'd had in High School or Junior High.

It was an eye-opening experience.

Which AP English class did you fail?

Which reading comprehension class did you fail?


None, which is why I asked. It's hard to take 3 years of AP English when they offer two courses.
 
2014-07-02 02:49:24 AM

Bennie Crabtree: Gawd! Ugh! Tonight I saw a trailer for a movie that was the most vomitous masturbatory trainwreck that ever oozed from Al Bundy's farts. Gross. All I could think of was, each one of the characters was either growing up to be Peg or Al. A whole movie of Al Bundies, but without a single joke. I mean they took high school football so seriously. They had so many serious feelings!!! They literally made it seem like the lives of everyone in the town depended on high school football. A guy had a farking heart attack over it. A father beat his son over it. When they started losing games, a dude got shot. And the movie actually made that seem heroic.


They are making a movie based on my High School?  I never knew.  Our HS football team all got busted by the police at a barn party after a game, they were all drunk.  The school made (empty) threats, and parents complained because if little big, corn-fed Timmy didn't play in the next game, we'd surely lose, and that's unacceptable!

Anyway, unless the system by which schools select their valedictorian changes to a weighted average, it's a stupid system.  I took AP classes.  A kid I was in school with had to leave campus to go to the community college for his math and science classes because he was so far ahead of the rest of us.  Our valedictorian was a girl who sailed through on the minimum level classes with a 4.0.  Not a difficult feat by any means.  Then we had to listen to her give a graduation speech with her tongue ring clanking on her teeth.
 
2014-07-02 02:59:00 AM

marcre3363: redmid17: marcre3363: I was desperate to get out of High School & took several Community College courses to get out early.

After three years of AP English, I took "English 1A" at the CC to satisfy my Senior English requirements.

After starting the class, I remember going back to my High School counselor several times to confirm that this class would satisfy the requirements. It was easier than any English class I'd had in High School or Junior High.

It was an eye-opening experience.

Which AP English class did you fail?

Which reading comprehension class did you fail?


To be more explicit, it would be a highly unusual arrangement to take 3 years of 2 AP classes, since AP classes typically are one year prep for the annual AP exam. It would seem to imply you failed one of the courses and had to retake it, especially since a student doesn't typically double up on English classes. That's not necessary, since you can take the test without the class, but you explicitly mentioned 3 years of AP English.

Ergo, you either took 3 years of AP exams and didn't do so well, or you took 3 years of AP English classes and needed to retake one.

So was it AP English Language and Composition or AP English Literature and Composition?
 
2014-07-02 03:00:12 AM
FTFA: "[A] mother complained to Browning that her son made honor roll, even though he had a D on his report card."

If the point is that the mother told the administrators their system makes it too easy to attain "Honor Roll" status, Exhibit A being her son, then I think this mother is kinda cool.
 
2014-07-02 03:09:23 AM

Mugato: angry parents paying a visit to the superintendent when a son or daughter lost out, sometimes by hundredths of a percentage point.

Those parents need a good coont punch.


No.. need directed into a classroom and taught basic math through a megaphone, "THIS IS WHY THEY LOST YOU MORONS!"
 
2014-07-02 03:50:30 AM
I always get a kick out of the whole valedictorian / salutatorian thing because the guys from my class that got those titles pretty much disappeared very soon after high school. And no, they were not bullied. Growing up with these guys, our teachers always spoke about them as though they were going to become millionaires, invent something amazing, and change the world. Neither one did. I heard the valedictorian couldn't hack college and became a mechanic with his dad. No one has heard from him in years. I was much better friends with the salutatorian, who is doing alright, but no better than anyone else. He turned his back on his family and friends as soon as he left for college. They were good enough guys, but neither one had an original thought, no creativity, no originality. All they ever did was memorize and regurgitate.

So yeah, those "honors" are meaningless. The only people that value them are the sociopathic, ladder climbing wing-nuts themselves and their Chardonnay-guzzling helicopter parents.
 
2014-07-02 04:07:16 AM

wildcardjack: The best students aren't there on graduation day because they're already in college.

Srsly, the good colleges shoudl be looking at how your AP grades were. The rest of highschool is just daycare to keep young adults out of the labor market.


This.  High schools are ditching the valedictorian because the valedictorian is likely continuing their education and thus doesn't really care about HS graduation, and statistically is unlikely to attend.

It has nothing to do with parents being douches, parents are  always douches and even if everything's perfect they'll come up to try to start fights with teachers over how perfect things are.  There's just little point in maintaining a ceremonial position for someone that typically won't attend the ceremony.

// Colleges care about class rank, but only in the top 5% / top 10% / top 50% sense, and they get most of that from standardized tests like AP exams and SATs rather than the bullshiat number the school gives them.  They couldn't give less of a shiat what order the top 10 people are for some shiatty high school in suburbia.

// Honestly, I think they request the HS transcript more to see if you've done anything that would block your transcript than because they care what it says, HS grade reporting is untrustworthy anyhow so few bother to read them beyond 'yup, they went to high school and finished all right'.
 
2014-07-02 04:26:50 AM
I never understood the rationale for making it a competition. Your relative performance in your tiny class size is meaningless. You either learnz the stuffz or you didn't. A 3.75GPA should be the same value no matter if you were first or last in your class. The grading system is supposed to be an evaluation of your activities, not the motivation for them.
 
2014-07-02 04:45:38 AM

abmoraz: "Joey brushed his teeth!  Give him a framed plaque!"


I don't know if the dental hygiene pun was intentional or not, but bravo, sir or madam.
 
2014-07-02 06:15:52 AM

Active introvert: It's because of people like this that we can't have nice things. Schools don't want to deal with the whinny parents because their little precious didn't win. Guess what people, you can't win everything. So now the schools are like "Fark it, no one will win."

The Valedictorian from my graduation class went to UCLA. She had a big write up in our local newspaper about how she was going to become a neuro surgeon . within a year, she had dropped out because it was too hard. Her little piece of paper saying she was valedictorian did nothing for her.


It's because of things like this that we can't have nice people.
 
2014-07-02 07:19:38 AM
My brother had the best weed for my graduation.
 
GBB
2014-07-02 07:20:16 AM

Frederf: I never understood the rationale for making it a competition. Your relative performance in your tiny class size is meaningless. You either learnz the stuffz or you didn't. A 3.75GPA should be the same value no matter if you were first or last in your class. The grading system is supposed to be an evaluation of your activities, not the motivation for them.


The whole grading system is messed up.  The bare minimum on the syllabus should be what's required for the next class in the cycle and learning it should be considered "average".   Learning anything above and beyond that should be considered "above average" and higher grades should be considered.

That right there would encourage go-getters to not only get higher grades, but also excel in whatever it is they do.  Those that learn the bare minimum would just be average or adequate and nothing more.
 
2014-07-02 07:32:18 AM

biscuitsngravy: My wife gave one of the most cliché-ridden salutatorian addresses in the history of high school commencement ceremonies. Nuke Laloosh-esque platitudes.   When we moved last year, we were cleaning shiat out, and we come across her *typed* speech.  We were in hysterics.

/Wife's class rank:  2 outta 396
//My class rank:  312 outta 396
///CSB


You must be great in the sack to make up for your other shortcomings.
 
2014-07-02 07:55:44 AM

DVOM: Who the fark can remember high school?


I cant. Thank god.
 
2014-07-02 07:57:30 AM
They should have more classes about militant Islam.
 
2014-07-02 07:59:00 AM
How in the fark did this ever become an issue in Florida?
 
2014-07-02 08:00:03 AM

The Googles Do Nothing: biscuitsngravy: My wife gave one of the most cliché-ridden salutatorian addresses in the history of high school commencement ceremonies. Nuke Laloosh-esque platitudes.   When we moved last year, we were cleaning shiat out, and we come across her *typed* speech.  We were in hysterics.

/Wife's class rank:  2 outta 396
//My class rank:  312 outta 396
///CSB

You must be great in the sack to make up for your other shortcomings.



Or well-to-do (she's female).
 
2014-07-02 08:10:30 AM

OtherLittleGuy: Mugato:  angry parents paying a visit to the superintendent when a son or daughter lost out, sometimes by hundredths of a percentage point.

Those parents need a good coont punch.

No virtual ties? Co-valedictorians?

Or just have it resolved by PKs or the Octagon.


When I graduated, two people were in the running for valedictorian. Throughout high school, they took the exact same classes except one. The same Honors classes (an additional .5 quality points, so an A gives a person a 4.5 instead of a 4.0), and all AP classes the same accept one (an addition 1.0 quality point, usually). The differerence was in the AP class. The girl took AP Computer Science while the guy took something else that I can't remember. Well, they both got straight A's throughout high school and should have had the same GPA, thus my class should have had co-valedictorians. Well, he threw a fit because he wasn't going to be the sole valedictorian. Therefore, his family (being who they were in the county - an uncle was a judge, an aunt was a teacher at the school) successfully argued with the school that the AP Computer Science class was not as difficult as the class he took, and the school awarded her only a 4.5 instead of a 5.0 for that class, which made him the sole valedictorian. Now she didn't care because she didn't want to cause any trouble and already had her full ride to college. The really sad thing is that I took the same AP Computer Science class, as did others, and no one else's GPA was changed, just hers.
 
2014-07-02 08:11:40 AM

Frederf: I never understood the rationale for making it a competition. Your relative performance in your tiny class size is meaningless. You either learnz the stuffz or you didn't. A 3.75GPA should be the same value no matter if you were first or last in your class. The grading system is supposed to be an evaluation of your activities, not the motivation for them.


That sounds like loser talk.
 
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