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(Keloland)   This just in: clearing clogged grass from a running lawnmower is a bad idea   (keloland.com) divider line 149
    More: Stupid  
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5999 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Jul 2014 at 8:13 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



149 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-07-01 09:07:20 PM  

whatdoyouexpect: This is an outrage! When will they start putting black box warnings on lawnmowers? WHAT DOES IT TAKE?!


"This lawnmower may contain peanuts or traces of peanuts"
 
2014-07-01 09:07:52 PM  

Lionel Mandrake: Also: don't push too hard on branches when feeding a wood-chipper.

I lost my head and half of my spine that way.


www.constantineintokyo.com
 
2014-07-01 09:08:14 PM  

NIXON YOU DOLT!!!!!: MFAWG: Mugato: ajgeek: but the fact that safety features don't exist on some of these machines (I'm talking real safety features, not "let's put a symbolic strip of piss poor steel here")

Well when you let go of the mower, the blades stop. If you need more of a safety feature than that, it's between you, Darwin and God.

Right?

The problem is idiots do things like tie the dead man switch down.  We need to make mowers safer to protect people from themselves, otherwise Darwin will win.


Darwin needs to win in circumstances like that and similar. Self resolving problems are the best.
 
2014-07-01 09:08:31 PM  

Herb Utsmelz: FirstNationalBastard: Of course, that's for push mowers. If you're trying to clear a riding mower without turning it off... What the fark are you thinking?

My mower shuts off when you rise up out of the seat.  It also shuts down if you put it in reverse with the blade engaged.  Don't know about other mowers.


Those things are easy to fix. Hell, I got my rider to cut while in reverse.


//likes to tease Darwin
 
2014-07-01 09:10:17 PM  
Seriously? How farking stupid do you have to be that you need to be told this?
 
2014-07-01 09:10:25 PM  

ArkAngel: Friend of mine did that. Lost two and a half fingers. He managed to get to of them put back on.


Said his wife "Oh no! The whole finger?"
To which he replied, "No, thank goodness, the one next to it."
 
2014-07-01 09:11:26 PM  
This Saturday is one of my favorite schadenfreude days: the day when I get to read about all the dumbshiats who injured themselves with fireworks.
 
2014-07-01 09:13:07 PM  
"Boy, I hate it when that happens."
 
2014-07-01 09:15:01 PM  
My dad's John Deere rider has a hose connector built into the deck. Presumably you're meant to run the water and blades at the same time.
 
2014-07-01 09:15:48 PM  
with 5 kids you learn fast
after the first 4 got hurt trying to clear the clogs the little fast one did the trick,
and i have been using him sense.
family motto is  "wait i think i can do it better".
 
2014-07-01 09:18:47 PM  
i would coat the bottom with wd40 and then moved on to pam spray
the girlfriend hated the fact we used an off brand for cooking for cooking
 and the mower was eating better than us
 
2014-07-01 09:21:36 PM  
BBC for the win!
 
2014-07-01 09:26:44 PM  

abhorrent1: Seriously? How farking stupid do you have to be that you need to be told this?


The country re-elected both Bush and Obama.  Think on that for a bit
 
2014-07-01 09:28:36 PM  

Jeng: I rather like my electric mower, if for nothing other than I never have to pull start it.

Put in rechargeable lithium battery.

Push the button, squeeze the handle, and you are mowing.

No excuse for ever not turning it off.


Greenworks 40 volt with the trimmer and blower so I have three batteries and two chargers.

Still getting used to how quiet the damm thing is.

And how the neighbor kids all want to push it.

Hmmm...maybe I can work that to my advantage.
 
2014-07-01 09:29:59 PM  

itsaidwhat: ArkAngel: Friend of mine did that. Lost two and a half fingers. He managed to get to of them put back on.

Said his wife "Oh no! The whole finger?"
To which he replied, "No, thank goodness, the one next to it."


I read so many threads on Fark that are nothing but libtard rants, homo lovefest 'group hug' stories, and of course the daily 'my life revolves around my right to get high' that I sometimes wonder why I come here.

Then I read a stupid joke like this and my faith is restored. I lol'd too much.

/yes, I'm a simple man and easily amused.
 
2014-07-01 09:30:32 PM  

Sin_City_Superhero: I lost a penis that way once...don't ask.


Check the medicine cabinet.  Sometimes that's where I leave mine.
 
2014-07-01 09:30:34 PM  

Mugato: ajgeek: but the fact that safety features don't exist on some of these machines (I'm talking real safety features, not "let's put a symbolic strip of piss poor steel here")

Well when you let go of the mower, the blades stop. If you need more of a safety feature than that, it's between you, Darwin and God.


I never tie down the switch. Just bad news all around, especially with my overly curious 4 year old.

The strip of metal I'm talking about is on push mowers around the clipping chute. It adds virtually nothing for structure and creates a LOT of clog problems even on half inch-1 inch mowing. It didn't take much to figure out how to mod the mower to A) be more structurally sound than it was and B) remove that stupid (rotting, might I add) strip of metal and holy crap if my push mower could actually mow a lawn!

I'd really prefer a shear pin over what passes for sacrificial parts. My 4 year old (again) thought it would be hilarious to drop a chunk of metal in the yard he found in the woods with his big brother. Now you may or may not have seen 50 year old woods metal, but I can tell you that it blends in *VERY* well with grass. Blade hit it, stopped very hard and oil started pouring out the side where oil shouldn't be coming out. Bent the arbor several degrees and cracked the engine block. To say I was furious is an understatement.
 
2014-07-01 09:31:23 PM  
sd.keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk
 
2014-07-01 09:31:25 PM  
I'm in the process of building a worse lawnmower. (double reel electric robot that comes out at night)
 
2014-07-01 09:31:52 PM  

Al!: Mugato: ajgeek: but the fact that safety features don't exist on some of these machines (I'm talking real safety features, not "let's put a symbolic strip of piss poor steel here")

Well when you let go of the mower, the blades stop. If you need more of a safety feature than that, it's between you, Darwin and God.

To piggyback on what ManateeGag said:

I was about 11 (1990ish) and had been told to never, ever reach underneath the mower unless it had been properly "disarmed," lest I be disarmed myself.  I was mowing the neighbors yard and his yard grew unevenly.  The front and sides got lots of sun, the back lots of shade, thus leaving the front and sides growing slowly and the back a jungle if it ever went a week or more during the summer.  I was mowing the back and the blades bogged down enough that the mower stopped.  My normal method of clearing it was to rock the mower back and drop it hard to shake the grass out.  When that didn't work, I let go of the deadman switch, tilted the mower back to allow easier access, and right as I reached down to free the giant clump of grass the mower kicked to life for one entire stroke.  Had I been 2 seconds faster reaching in there I would be typing this with only my right hand.  Instead I learned a valuable lesson: don't ever trust a safety feature when you know a safer method.


Not to be too pedantic, but wouldn't a deadman's switch start the mower when released?
 
2014-07-01 09:34:42 PM  

buckler: Al!: Mugato: ajgeek: but the fact that safety features don't exist on some of these machines (I'm talking real safety features, not "let's put a symbolic strip of piss poor steel here")

Well when you let go of the mower, the blades stop. If you need more of a safety feature than that, it's between you, Darwin and God.

To piggyback on what ManateeGag said:

I was about 11 (1990ish) and had been told to never, ever reach underneath the mower unless it had been properly "disarmed," lest I be disarmed myself.  I was mowing the neighbors yard and his yard grew unevenly.  The front and sides got lots of sun, the back lots of shade, thus leaving the front and sides growing slowly and the back a jungle if it ever went a week or more during the summer.  I was mowing the back and the blades bogged down enough that the mower stopped.  My normal method of clearing it was to rock the mower back and drop it hard to shake the grass out.  When that didn't work, I let go of the deadman switch, tilted the mower back to allow easier access, and right as I reached down to free the giant clump of grass the mower kicked to life for one entire stroke.  Had I been 2 seconds faster reaching in there I would be typing this with only my right hand.  Instead I learned a valuable lesson: don't ever trust a safety feature when you know a safer method.

Not to be too pedantic, but wouldn't a deadman's switch start the mower when released?



3.bp.blogspot.com

"Switches can be used to turn things on and/or off."
 
2014-07-01 09:42:13 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: abhorrent1: Seriously? How farking stupid do you have to be that you need to be told this?

The country re-elected both Bush and Obama.  Think on that for a bit


In fairness, Bush the 2nd was really only elected once...
 
2014-07-01 09:42:18 PM  

farkingismybusiness


[pic of fat redneck holding a push mower on a stick]

Clogged grass is a bad idea, but what about hedges?


So he's wrapped plastic (or duct tape?) around the fins of an air-cooled engine. Interesting.


That's not the biggest fail in the picture, just the one I felt compelled to mention.
 
2014-07-01 09:42:48 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: buckler: Al!: Mugato: ajgeek: but the fact that safety features don't exist on some of these machines (I'm talking real safety features, not "let's put a symbolic strip of piss poor steel here")

Well when you let go of the mower, the blades stop. If you need more of a safety feature than that, it's between you, Darwin and God.

To piggyback on what ManateeGag said:

I was about 11 (1990ish) and had been told to never, ever reach underneath the mower unless it had been properly "disarmed," lest I be disarmed myself.  I was mowing the neighbors yard and his yard grew unevenly.  The front and sides got lots of sun, the back lots of shade, thus leaving the front and sides growing slowly and the back a jungle if it ever went a week or more during the summer.  I was mowing the back and the blades bogged down enough that the mower stopped.  My normal method of clearing it was to rock the mower back and drop it hard to shake the grass out.  When that didn't work, I let go of the deadman switch, tilted the mower back to allow easier access, and right as I reached down to free the giant clump of grass the mower kicked to life for one entire stroke.  Had I been 2 seconds faster reaching in there I would be typing this with only my right hand.  Instead I learned a valuable lesson: don't ever trust a safety feature when you know a safer method.

Not to be too pedantic, but wouldn't a deadman's switch start the mower when released?


[3.bp.blogspot.com image 200x150]

"Switches can be used to turn things on and/or off."


Deadmans' switches typically allow current to run when the switch is released.
 
2014-07-01 09:44:19 PM  
I haven't mowed my own lawn (2 different houses) in 20 years.... there are people I pay to risk their own fingers.
 
2014-07-01 09:49:44 PM  

buckler: ArcadianRefugee: buckler: Al!: Mugato: ajgeek: but the fact that safety features don't exist on some of these machines (I'm talking real safety features, not "let's put a symbolic strip of piss poor steel here")

Well when you let go of the mower, the blades stop. If you need more of a safety feature than that, it's between you, Darwin and God.

To piggyback on what ManateeGag said:

I was about 11 (1990ish) and had been told to never, ever reach underneath the mower unless it had been properly "disarmed," lest I be disarmed myself.  I was mowing the neighbors yard and his yard grew unevenly.  The front and sides got lots of sun, the back lots of shade, thus leaving the front and sides growing slowly and the back a jungle if it ever went a week or more during the summer.  I was mowing the back and the blades bogged down enough that the mower stopped.  My normal method of clearing it was to rock the mower back and drop it hard to shake the grass out.  When that didn't work, I let go of the deadman switch, tilted the mower back to allow easier access, and right as I reached down to free the giant clump of grass the mower kicked to life for one entire stroke.  Had I been 2 seconds faster reaching in there I would be typing this with only my right hand.  Instead I learned a valuable lesson: don't ever trust a safety feature when you know a safer method.

Not to be too pedantic, but wouldn't a deadman's switch start the mower when released?


[3.bp.blogspot.com image 200x150]

"Switches can be used to turn things on and/or off."

Deadmans' switches typically allow current to run when the switch is released.


A deadman switch is a normally open momentary switch that breaks the ignition circuit when released, except where a magneto ignition is in use, in which case it is a normally closed switch that grounds the mag. Sometimes they use a no/nc switch to cut out the starter circuit, in which case you are the best kind of correct.
 
2014-07-01 09:54:27 PM  

ArkAngel: Friend of mine did that. Lost two and a half fingers. He managed to get to of them put back on.


Did you type that with to fingers?
 
2014-07-01 09:54:55 PM  

sporkme: buckler: ArcadianRefugee: buckler: Al!: Mugato: ajgeek: but the fact that safety features don't exist on some of these machines (I'm talking real safety features, not "let's put a symbolic strip of piss poor steel here")

Well when you let go of the mower, the blades stop. If you need more of a safety feature than that, it's between you, Darwin and God.

To piggyback on what ManateeGag said:

I was about 11 (1990ish) and had been told to never, ever reach underneath the mower unless it had been properly "disarmed," lest I be disarmed myself.  I was mowing the neighbors yard and his yard grew unevenly.  The front and sides got lots of sun, the back lots of shade, thus leaving the front and sides growing slowly and the back a jungle if it ever went a week or more during the summer.  I was mowing the back and the blades bogged down enough that the mower stopped.  My normal method of clearing it was to rock the mower back and drop it hard to shake the grass out.  When that didn't work, I let go of the deadman switch, tilted the mower back to allow easier access, and right as I reached down to free the giant clump of grass the mower kicked to life for one entire stroke.  Had I been 2 seconds faster reaching in there I would be typing this with only my right hand.  Instead I learned a valuable lesson: don't ever trust a safety feature when you know a safer method.

Not to be too pedantic, but wouldn't a deadman's switch start the mower when released?


[3.bp.blogspot.com image 200x150]

"Switches can be used to turn things on and/or off."

Deadmans' switches typically allow current to run when the switch is released.

A deadman switch is a normally open momentary switch that breaks the ignition circuit when released, except where a magneto ignition is in use, in which case it is a normally closed switch that grounds the mag. Sometimes they use a no/nc switch to cut out the starter circuit, in which case you are the best kind of correct.


Okey-dokey, then. I'm accustomed to hearing it in the context of explosives. :D

Color me "Technically-correct", then.
 
2014-07-01 09:55:02 PM  

Englebert Slaptyback: farkingismybusiness

[pic of fat redneck holding a push mower on a stick]

Clogged grass is a bad idea, but what about hedges?


So he's wrapped plastic (or duct tape?) around the fins of an air-cooled engine. Interesting.


That's not the biggest fail in the picture, just the one I felt compelled to mention.


i1.ytimg.com
At least it's safer than his other method.
 
2014-07-01 10:00:09 PM  
And people wonder why I am so arrogant and act like I'm so darned smart around them?!

It's because I'm surrounded by stupid people who barely earn the right to be called advanced primates, and sometimes I feel like a rocket scientist trapped in a room full of gibbons.
 
2014-07-01 10:00:42 PM  
manuals.deere.com
manuals.deere.com

manuals.deere.com

encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
 
2014-07-01 10:02:07 PM  
No mention of pulling a push mower up a hill????  Have an uncle who lost some toes pulling a mower over his foot.
 
2014-07-01 10:06:03 PM  

farkingismybusiness


[pic of fat redneck swinging a chain saw on a rope]

At least it's safer than his other method.


*boggle*

That's just... wow.
 
2014-07-01 10:19:07 PM  
My grandpa lost 3 fingers to a lawn mower.  July 24, 1978.  I know the date because that's also the night my sister was born.  He ran in to my parents at the hospital and that's how we learned about it.
 
2014-07-01 10:20:44 PM  

Englebert Slaptyback: farkingismybusiness

[pic of fat redneck swinging a chain saw on a rope]

At least it's safer than his other method.


*boggle*

That's just... wow.


I am sure before he did that he asked someone to hold his beer.
 
2014-07-01 10:29:42 PM  

Mugato: ajgeek: but the fact that safety features don't exist on some of these machines (I'm talking real safety features, not "let's put a symbolic strip of piss poor steel here")

Well when you let go of the mower, the blades stop. If you need more of a safety feature than that, it's between you, Darwin and God.


Exactly! Once you let go of the handle, its perfectly safe to jam your fingers in there. That's how all lawn mowers work! I have no clue how anyone manages to hurt themselves.

// warning: Do not take safety advice from people named after Monty Python sketches
 
2014-07-01 10:32:32 PM  

farkingismybusiness: At least it's safer than his other method.


But I don't see the other guy holding his beer...
 
2014-07-01 10:33:16 PM  

ajgeek: Mugato: ajgeek: but the fact that safety features don't exist on some of these machines (I'm talking real safety features, not "let's put a symbolic strip of piss poor steel here")

Well when you let go of the mower, the blades stop. If you need more of a safety feature than that, it's between you, Darwin and God.

I never tie down the switch. Just bad news all around, especially with my overly curious 4 year old.

The strip of metal I'm talking about is on push mowers around the clipping chute. It adds virtually nothing for structure and creates a LOT of clog problems even on half inch-1 inch mowing. It didn't take much to figure out how to mod the mower to A) be more structurally sound than it was and B) remove that stupid (rotting, might I add) strip of metal and holy crap if my push mower could actually mow a lawn!

I'd really prefer a shear pin over what passes for sacrificial parts. My 4 year old (again) thought it would be hilarious to drop a chunk of metal in the yard he found in the woods with his big brother. Now you may or may not have seen 50 year old woods metal, but I can tell you that it blends in *VERY* well with grass. Blade hit it, stopped very hard and oil started pouring out the side where oil shouldn't be coming out. Bent the arbor several degrees and cracked the engine block. To say I was furious is an understatement.


There's no reason for a shear pin.  All it would do is cause problems.  Even a medium sized stick is stiffer than a finger.  Given the speed of the blade, there's no way it wouldn't just chop off your finger even if it tripped the shear pin.

On another note speaking of shear pins and blades, I own what most people would probably consider a commercial mower.  I have about 4 acres of grass to mow.  I own a 24HP diesel Kubota tractor.  The kind with 3 point hitch, pto, loader attachment, etc.  It has a 60 inch mower deck (yes underneath not pull behind).  This thing is shaft driven off the pto.  Well let's just say it has some power.  I can mow at 10 mph, i can mow with standing water in the grass, i can mow knee high grass.  The torque on this machine is very nice.  Well I've stopped it dead a couple times.  Once tangled in barbed wire.  That was fun.

But one thing that apparently DID NOT STOP THE MACHINE was when one of my kids apparently mowed over an aluminum baseball bat.  YEP.  Cut the end off it and put about a 30 degree bow in it and it had several gashes right through the metal.  I didn't find it until weeks later and none of my kids said they noticed it when they ran it over.  How do you not notice a baseball bat getting chewed up and spit out?  One has a bad habit of wearing ear buds/iTunes when mowing.  Guessing with music blaring they never noticed the insane banging and vibration when it ran over the bat.

Oh and yes you can get off the machine with the mower blades running.  No idea why.  You can't drive forward or backward when off the machine (it kills the engine) so there's safety locks, just not on the mower.
 
2014-07-01 10:33:31 PM  
I cut off the tip of my index finger this way. Luckily my dad was able to get a cosmetic surgeon to sew it back on. Lost a bit of bone, so it's a little shorter, but looks pretty normal.

I was 13. Old pull-start gas mower in the 70s. Man that hurt. It was strange going to school on codeine for a while afterwards.
 
2014-07-01 10:35:41 PM  
The perfect mower

img.fark.net
 
2014-07-01 10:36:53 PM  

studebaker hoch: img.fark.net


Sadly, this happened kinda near where I live.
 
2014-07-01 10:37:50 PM  
Goodammit to hell.

THIS

img.fark.net

is the sad thing that happened.

Now I'm laughing and talking about a kid run over by a lawn mower.

Aw, shiat.
 
2014-07-01 10:39:57 PM  

BluVeinThrobber: The perfect mower

[img.fark.net image 203x248]


But there's no height adjustment.
 
2014-07-01 10:40:29 PM  
I got my third degree black belt by picking grass out of a running mower. Thank you Bruce Lee!
 
2014-07-01 10:41:46 PM  

BluVeinThrobber: The perfect mower

[img.fark.net image 203x248]


it might be perfect but do you know how many dicks have been lost to one???
 
2014-07-01 10:43:57 PM  

brandent: How do you not notice a baseball bat getting chewed up and spit out?


I'll share my mowing CSB from when I was a kid (30ish years ago), and managed to use a mower to destroy its own gas tank.

Using an ordinary push-mower to mow an acre or so of a 5-acre field. I'm going along the edge, which is pretty rough (ditches and such). Watching the side, I fail to notice the plastic gas tank fall off of the front of the mower. I run over it, thinking it's just another rough patch. The engine keeps running for a short time, on the gas in the carburetor.

The mower's blade cut off a corner of the tank, rendering the tank useless for its intended purpose. My dad was not amused.
 
2014-07-01 10:44:04 PM  
I have an electric mower. Just let go of the handle, no gas, no problems.
 
2014-07-01 10:45:20 PM  

The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves: It's a mistake you can only make twice... OK maybe four times.


I bet prosthetic wooden peg appendages would let you continue indefinitely.
 
2014-07-01 10:47:02 PM  
My uncle ran over a length of old wire that was in the tall grass. It whipped around, hit his leg above the ankle, and wrapped around it so tight that it went clear to the bone. That story made me extra careful about looking at what was in my path. Apparently not careful enough to keep from sticking my finger in the chute though.
 
2014-07-01 10:47:09 PM  

WTP 2: BluVeinThrobber: The perfect mower

[img.fark.net image 203x248]

it might be perfect but do you know how many dicks have been lost to one???


I'm guessing yours?
 
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