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(Mother Nature Network)   If you drink coffee on the way to work, why not just brew coffee on the way to work?   (mnn.com ) divider line
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4811 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Jun 2014 at 8:06 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



65 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-06-26 02:54:01 AM  
Eh, it's not like we really need to be paying attention to the road or anything.
 
2014-06-26 04:17:36 AM  
Because my car's battery is already taking a beating with the radio blaring and the A/C blasting.
 
2014-06-26 06:53:50 AM  
Why stop there?  I think they should have an easy bake oven for the car.  That would be totally awesome. I could make little cakes on my commute.
 
2014-06-26 08:07:53 AM  

If you drink coffee on the way to work, why not just brew coffee on the way to work?


Because if it's not brewed yet, one cannot drink it? Seems pretty straightforward.
 
2014-06-26 08:08:53 AM  
You can get a ticket for talking on your cell, but opening a Starbucks in the glove box is okay.
 
2014-06-26 08:09:48 AM  

Ambivalence


Why stop there? I think they should have an easy bake oven for the car. That would be totally awesome. I could make little cakes on my commute.


www.cityweekly.net
 
2014-06-26 08:14:08 AM  
Why even bother with a permanent dwelling anymore?
 
2014-06-26 08:17:37 AM  

Ambivalence: Why stop there?  I think they should have an easy bake oven for the car.  That would be totally awesome. I could make little cakes on my commute.


The guy in the article a few down turned his entire car into a smoker and will going to jail for it.
 
2014-06-26 08:21:26 AM  
I want this to be a self correcting problem, but like texting this is going to get other people killed.
 
2014-06-26 08:21:48 AM  
www.metaltalk.net

Won't be trying out this idea any time soon.
 
2014-06-26 08:28:51 AM  
I make vodak and meth as I drive to work.  It's the only way I can tolerate work and driving to work.

img.fark.net
In a pinch, vodak makes an excellent brake fluid.  You'll be the hit of the car pool if you ever break down on the side of the road and need some brake fluid.  Of course, depending on how much fluid the car needs, it might mean a lengthy sobriety for you.  So choose wisely.
 
2014-06-26 08:33:18 AM  

assburp: Why even bother with a permanent dwelling anymore?


Cripes. I submitted a tiny houses link years ago, and there were a few on FARK since, and now there's a tiny houses TV show. WTF?
 
2014-06-26 08:36:09 AM  
It depends; how many eagles does it have?
 
2014-06-26 08:45:59 AM  
I'm not going to brew my coffee on the way to work unless I can also roast and grind the beans on the way to work.  I won't drink swill.
 
2014-06-26 08:48:45 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Because my car's battery is already taking a beating with the radio blaring and the A/C blasting.


Unless you have 300 watt speakers, I doubt it. Most car A/C units run off a compressor powered by the motors rotation, not electricity.
 
2014-06-26 08:48:53 AM  

Harry Freakstorm: I make vodak and meth as I drive to work.  It's the only way I can tolerate work and driving to work.

[img.fark.net image 195x259]
In a pinch, vodak makes an excellent brake fluid.  You'll be the hit of the car pool if you ever break down on the side of the road and need some brake fluid.  Of course, depending on how much fluid the car needs, it might mean a lengthy sobriety for you.  So choose wisely.


home brew beer would be good.
 
2014-06-26 08:56:23 AM  

reillan: I'm not going to brew my coffee on the way to work unless I can also roast and grind the beans on the way to work.  I won't drink swill.


I have a civet cat in a cage making kopi luwak beans in in the back seat of my car...
 
2014-06-26 08:59:46 AM  

kling_klang_bed: [www.metaltalk.net image 398x541]

Won't be trying out this idea any time soon.


I see what you did there, and no he won't.  I wonder if anyone else will get that.
 
2014-06-26 09:02:28 AM  

Carn: kling_klang_bed: [www.metaltalk.net image 398x541]

Won't be trying out this idea any time soon.

I see what you did there, and no he won't.  I wonder if anyone else will get that.


Sure someone will. Nothing is obscure on Fark.
 
2014-06-26 09:14:45 AM  

Englebert Slaptyback: Ambivalence

Why stop there? I think they should have an easy bake oven for the car. That would be totally awesome. I could make little cakes on my commute.


[www.cityweekly.net image 396x335]


Came to post almost the same

hooniverse.com
 
2014-06-26 09:16:31 AM  
How farking lazy are people that they can't take the 30 seconds to load up the Mr. Coffee in the morning?  Now I'll have to be even more careful of the swerving Audis.
 
2014-06-26 09:23:24 AM  

Ker_Thwap: How farking lazy are people that they can't take the 30 seconds to load up the Mr. Coffee in the morning?  Now I'll have to be even more careful of the swerving Audis.


even better, my mr coffee is so fancy that it has a timed feature that allows me to put the coffee grounds and water in before i go to bed, and i wake up to a freshly brewed pot of coffee! set me back a cool $35 at target, and brews up to 12 delicious cups of java

and i have a 16 oz travel mug that i fill up to take with me, after i've already drank a cup with my breakfast at home
 
2014-06-26 09:23:27 AM  
Next year this time someone who bought one of these is going to sue for severe burns.
 
2014-06-26 09:24:21 AM  
As soon you buy it, you know that's the moment you land a new job that lets you work from home.
 
2014-06-26 09:26:49 AM  

bungle_jr: Ker_Thwap: How farking lazy are people that they can't take the 30 seconds to load up the Mr. Coffee in the morning?  Now I'll have to be even more careful of the swerving Audis.

even better, my mr coffee is so fancy that it has a timed feature that allows me to put the coffee grounds and water in before i go to bed, and i wake up to a freshly brewed pot of coffee! set me back a cool $35 at target, and brews up to 12 delicious cups of java

and i have a 16 oz travel mug that i fill up to take with me, after i've already drank a cup with my breakfast at home


Truly you are from the future, and I marvel at your strange and beautiful ways.
 
2014-06-26 09:28:55 AM  

StopDaddy: bungle_jr: Ker_Thwap: How farking lazy are people that they can't take the 30 seconds to load up the Mr. Coffee in the morning?  Now I'll have to be even more careful of the swerving Audis.

even better, my mr coffee is so fancy that it has a timed feature that allows me to put the coffee grounds and water in before i go to bed, and i wake up to a freshly brewed pot of coffee! set me back a cool $35 at target, and brews up to 12 delicious cups of java

and i have a 16 oz travel mug that i fill up to take with me, after i've already drank a cup with my breakfast at home

Truly you are from the future, and I marvel at your strange and beautiful ways.


bow to me, i am your new coffee chugging master!
 
2014-06-26 09:33:20 AM  

abhorrent1: Englebert Slaptyback: Ambivalence

Why stop there? I think they should have an easy bake oven for the car. That would be totally awesome. I could make little cakes on my commute.


[www.cityweekly.net image 396x335]

Came to post almost the same

[hooniverse.com image 394x295]


I've heard of truckers putting a foil wrapped chicken in the engine compartment to cook it.
 
2014-06-26 09:34:15 AM  

bungle_jr: StopDaddy: bungle_jr: Ker_Thwap: How farking lazy are people that they can't take the 30 seconds to load up the Mr. Coffee in the morning?  Now I'll have to be even more careful of the swerving Audis.

even better, my mr coffee is so fancy that it has a timed feature that allows me to put the coffee grounds and water in before i go to bed, and i wake up to a freshly brewed pot of coffee! set me back a cool $35 at target, and brews up to 12 delicious cups of java

and i have a 16 oz travel mug that i fill up to take with me, after i've already drank a cup with my breakfast at home

Truly you are from the future, and I marvel at your strange and beautiful ways.

bow to me, i am your new coffee chugging master!

 
2014-06-26 09:37:58 AM  

bungle_jr: StopDaddy: bungle_jr: Ker_Thwap: How farking lazy are people that they can't take the 30 seconds to load up the Mr. Coffee in the morning?  Now I'll have to be even more careful of the swerving Audis.

even better, my mr coffee is so fancy that it has a timed feature that allows me to put the coffee grounds and water in before i go to bed, and i wake up to a freshly brewed pot of coffee! set me back a cool $35 at target, and brews up to 12 delicious cups of java

and i have a 16 oz travel mug that i fill up to take with me, after i've already drank a cup with my breakfast at home

Truly you are from the future, and I marvel at your strange and beautiful ways.

bow to me, i am your new coffee chugging master!



img.fark.net

Second try :/
 
2014-06-26 09:38:41 AM  

uber humper: abhorrent1: Englebert Slaptyback: Ambivalence

Why stop there? I think they should have an easy bake oven for the car. That would be totally awesome. I could make little cakes on my commute.


[www.cityweekly.net image 396x335]

Came to post almost the same

[hooniverse.com image 394x295]

I've heard of truckers putting a foil wrapped chicken in the engine compartment to cook it.


Someone did that on some TV show I saw a long time ago. Not a sitcom but some car show to see if it actually worked. I guess it does but I can't imagine it tastes very good.
 
2014-06-26 09:43:17 AM  

reillan: I'm not going to brew my coffee on the way to work unless I can also roast and grind the beans on the way to work.  I won't drink swill.


Sn0bs will be sn0bs.

Even if you were being glib, my statement stands (generalizing).
 
2014-06-26 09:45:57 AM  

abhorrent1


uber humper: I've heard of truckers putting a foil wrapped chicken in the engine compartment to cook it.

Someone did that on some TV show I saw a long time ago. Not a sitcom but some car show to see if it actually worked. I guess it does but I can't imagine it tastes very good.


In 2012 there was a Mythbusters episode - featuring Alton Brown - where they cooked an entire Thanksgiving meal using the engine and transmission in a late-1970s (IIRC) Cadillac convertible.

Here's a clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqABijWMlxA

The results were quite acceptable, if memory serves.
 
2014-06-26 09:49:13 AM  
The Dumbass tab must be on vacation. These devices must be banned. I can see the multi-car pile-ups on the freeways already.
 
2014-06-26 09:49:15 AM  
obligatory

img.fark.net
 
2014-06-26 09:52:13 AM  
checkit.alexng.net

That's the worst idea I ever heard in my life.
Yes, this is horrible.  This idea.
 
2014-06-26 09:52:27 AM  
How can a good driver be expected to talk/text on the phone, drive slow in the passing lane, put makeup on, smoke AND make cofffee? I mean come on, get real.
 
2014-06-26 09:55:42 AM  

litespeed74: How can a good driver be expected to talk/text on the phone, drive slow in the passing lane, put makeup on, smoke AND make cofffee? I mean come on, get real.


Just because you can't walk and chew gum doesn't mean I can't do these things!  It's actually safer when I'm high!

/I kid.
 
2014-06-26 10:02:26 AM  
I will very nearly kill for coffee if I can't get any first thing in the morning. And I just might the next time someone laughs at me while I'm going through withdrawal. But this still seems like a seriously bad idea. If not for the distraction element, then for the hot liquids splashing around next to my lap part.
 
2014-06-26 10:12:24 AM  
Thank goodness, my crotch has been simply crying out for a thorough dick-blistering scalding for ages!
 
2014-06-26 10:15:37 AM  
Because that's stupid.
 
2014-06-26 10:16:19 AM  

bungle_jr: Ker_Thwap: How farking lazy are people that they can't take the 30 seconds to load up the Mr. Coffee in the morning?  Now I'll have to be even more careful of the swerving Audis.

even better, my mr coffee is so fancy that it has a timed feature that allows me to put the coffee grounds and water in before i go to bed, and i wake up to a freshly brewed pot of coffee! set me back a cool $35 at target, and brews up to 12 delicious cups of java

and i have a 16 oz travel mug that i fill up to take with me, after i've already drank a cup with my breakfast at home


www.thesilo.ca
Java?
 
2014-06-26 10:24:44 AM  
I stopped reading at "my Volkswagen Turbo Bug's cupholder" but I don't think I missed anything important.
 
2014-06-26 10:27:25 AM  

Czechzican: Eh, it's not like we really need to be paying attention to the road or anything.


This.

Besides, we coffee snobs have ya covered.  http://www.amazon.com/Bodum-Insulated-Plastic-0-45-Liter-15-Ounce/dp/ B 008LWVI6E And at worst, the only user interaction that needs be done in the car is to push the plunger, though I would rather you do that before you leave the driveway.

It's not like anyone needs another fscking distraction inside the passenger compartment. A 12-volt espresso machine in the cupholder? Please. Like I tell the makeup-putter-onners on the road: Get your ass up 15 minutes earlier!
 
2014-06-26 10:36:40 AM  
Grow coffee plants in the trunk, roast coffee beans in the engine compartment, grind, brew and drink coffee in the passenger compartment and relieve yourself of biologically filtered coffee remains through a hole in the floorboards.  You could drive forever but you'd still have to stop somewhere for gasoline and water every so often, and you know what else you can buy there?  Coffee.
 
2014-06-26 10:38:09 AM  

AMonkey'sUncle: reillan: I'm not going to brew my coffee on the way to work unless I can also roast and grind the beans on the way to work.  I won't drink swill.

Sn0bs will be sn0bs.

Even if you were being glib, my statement stands (generalizing).


I'm sorry, my nose was too far up my own ass to be able to hear you.
 
2014-06-26 10:47:21 AM  

kling_klang_bed: Carn: kling_klang_bed: [www.metaltalk.net image 398x541]

Won't be trying out this idea any time soon.

I see what you did there, and no he won't.  I wonder if anyone else will get that.

Sure someone will. Nothing is obscure on Fark.


I'll help out.  The picture is the lead singer of Lamb of God.  Despite being a casual Lamb of God fan I did not get the reference, so I took to google.  Apparently, within the past month he managed to accidentally burn his penis with coffee while driving:  http://radio.com/2014/06/18/randy-blythe-burn-penis-lamb-of-god/  (it's an amusing read).
 
2014-06-26 10:53:57 AM  

Mad Scientist: reillan: I'm not going to brew my coffee on the way to work unless I can also roast and grind the beans on the way to work.  I won't drink swill.

I have a civet cat in a cage making kopi luwak beans in in the back seat of my car...

Now I'm grateful I don't actually drink coffee and only diet pop was coming out of my nose when I read this.

JackieRabbit: The Dumbass tab must be on vacation. These devices must be banned. I can see the multi-car pile-ups on the freeways already.

How can you see them if you're being properly busy making coffee while driving?

storm16: It's not like anyone needs another fscking distraction inside the passenger compartment. A 12-volt espresso machine in the cupholder? Please. Like I tell the makeup-putter-onners people making TV dinners on the road: Get your ass up 15 minutes earlier!

For a city of a million folks, we have so little traffic that we actually can read, brew beer, make meth and still keep our men happy by doling out BJs and sammiches while driving. Not to mention chasing after the kids.
 
2014-06-26 10:54:38 AM  

reillan: I'm not going to brew my coffee on the way to work unless I can also roast and grind the beans on the way to work.  I won't drink swill.


I would not settle for coffee beans that were not first grown in my car by a portable, fair trade coffee farmer.
 
2014-06-26 10:58:55 AM  

Mad Scientist: reillan: I'm not going to brew my coffee on the way to work unless I can also roast and grind the beans on the way to work.  I won't drink swill.

I have a civet cat in a cage making kopi luwak beans in in the back seat of my car...


But first you need the portable fair trade farmer, then the civet cat to eat and poo the beans out, and then the portable bean roaster and grinder. That is the only portable coffee you should settle for.
 
2014-06-26 11:00:38 AM  
It may be good for a camping trip or a long road trip. Rest-stop coffee is universally terrible.
 
2014-06-26 11:01:28 AM  
cdn.shopify.com
 
2014-06-26 11:21:53 AM  

Englebert Slaptyback: abhorrent1

uber humper: I've heard of truckers putting a foil wrapped chicken in the engine compartment to cook it.

Someone did that on some TV show I saw a long time ago. Not a sitcom but some car show to see if it actually worked. I guess it does but I can't imagine it tastes very good.


In 2012 there was a Mythbusters episode - featuring Alton Brown - where they cooked an entire Thanksgiving meal using the engine and transmission in a late-1970s (IIRC) Cadillac convertible.

Here's a clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqABijWMlxA

The results were quite acceptable, if memory serves.



hell, there's an entire cook book. I remember when the original came out.  Was probably 20 years ago...
img.fark.net
http://www.amazon.com/Manifold-Destiny-Guide-Cooking-Engine/dp/14165 96 232
 
2014-06-26 11:25:31 AM  

jxb465: I stopped reading at "my Volkswagen Turbo Bug's cupholder" but I don't think I missed anything important.


I chuckled at that too, and thought "what, were they all out of Miata's that day Jim?"
 
2014-06-26 12:04:10 PM  
This is going right into the books of bad ideas, along with the Car Bars and record players of the 50's.

It's always interesting when someone develops an idea for a new Car Toy like the add on dashboard LED TV screens of a few years back, and forget all about the potential lethal consequences for distracted driving in their rush for profits.

I knew a courier driver who bought one of those miniature TVs back in the 90's that plugged into the cigarette lighter of your car. A soccer fan, he stuck it on this delivery van dashboard, draped it in a towel to hide it from the cops and delivered his high traffic route while watching a game.

Back in the 80's, when laptops were showing up, some company designed a portable printer you could plug into your cigarette lighter and print things out as you drove.

It also ran on batteries for when you were away from your car or an electrical socket, but it ate those things by the handful. (They hadn't come out with real good portable computer batteries for it at that time. You tossed in a handful of D's.)

With all of the driver distracting things that have come out over the decades, I suspect someone out there wants to 'cull the herd' by giving folks assorted nifty ways to plow into things without having to get drunk first.
 
2014-06-26 12:04:39 PM  

HailRobonia: It depends; how many eagles does it have?


An awful lot, but not as many as the luxury edition.
 
2014-06-26 12:13:07 PM  

Englebert Slaptyback: abhorrent1

uber humper: I've heard of truckers putting a foil wrapped chicken in the engine compartment to cook it.

Someone did that on some TV show I saw a long time ago. Not a sitcom but some car show to see if it actually worked. I guess it does but I can't imagine it tastes very good.


In 2012 there was a Mythbusters episode - featuring Alton Brown - where they cooked an entire Thanksgiving meal using the engine and transmission in a late-1970s (IIRC) Cadillac convertible.

Here's a clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqABijWMlxA

The results were quite acceptable, if memory serves.


Alton also originally did it on the first Feasting on Asphalt, with similar results.
 
2014-06-26 12:17:00 PM  
If you build it, Americans will buy it. -- The Motto of Detroit

graphics8.nytimes.com

Notice the cup holder. The most important part of any car.

Also notice the steps. This is how the Duke Brothers really got their fat asses into the Robert E. Lee.

Photo hot from a NYT blog.

 
2014-06-26 12:35:30 PM  

reillan: AMonkey'sUncle: reillan: I'm not going to brew my coffee on the way to work unless I can also roast and grind the beans on the way to work.  I won't drink swill.

Sn0bs will be sn0bs.

Even if you were being glib, my statement stands (generalizing).

I'm sorry, my nose was too far up my own ass to be able to hear you.


Cheers!
 
2014-06-26 01:33:31 PM  

jxb465: I stopped reading at "my Volkswagen Turbo Bug's cupholder" but I don't think I missed anything important.


That's also were I stopped.  It's not just that he owns one, but feels compelled to tell everyone.  Enough already.
 
2014-06-26 01:35:39 PM  
I'd rather have a little refrigerator in my car.
 
2014-06-26 01:58:18 PM  

bentley57: I'd rather have a little refrigerator in my car.


You can get them, but they aren't cheap.
 
2014-06-26 02:02:16 PM  

Ivo Shandor: bentley57: I'd rather have a little refrigerator in my car.

You can get them, but they aren't cheap.


truth...the one you linked is $358.85 on amazon!
 
2014-06-26 02:27:13 PM  
But suppose I was running late and didn't have time to make that coffee

I don't care how late I am. Coffee comes first.
 
2014-06-26 02:33:58 PM  

brap: Thank goodness, my crotch has been simply crying out for a thorough dick-blistering scalding for ages!


Fark is not your personal erotica site.

/ OK, well just this once ... She watched intently as her cute friend poured the cold water into the big bad machine slowly ...
 
2014-06-26 05:59:07 PM  

Rik01: With all of the driver distracting things that have come out over the decades, I suspect someone out there wants to 'cull the herd' by giving folks assorted nifty ways to plow into things without having to get drunk first.

His name is "Charles Darwin," I believe.

bentley57: I'd rather have a little refrigerator in my car.


I see them at Target and places like that every spring/summer (trying to get the travelers and those going back to school). Not expensive, just look around.
 
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