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(The Atlantic)   Science confirms musicians are "sexy." Except drummers; they will always be confused for homeless people   (theatlantic.com) divider line 102
    More: PSA, Biological life cycle, University of Sussex, Tim McGraw  
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2597 clicks; posted to Geek » on 25 Jun 2014 at 10:33 AM (14 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



102 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-06-25 09:03:44 AM
www.musiciansare.com
 
2014-06-25 09:08:30 AM
Settle down Lars.
 
2014-06-25 09:13:10 AM
Homeless? Excuse me?

www.gq.com
 
2014-06-25 09:43:39 AM

i1123.photobucket.com

 
2014-06-25 10:11:09 AM
www.disney.co.uk
 
2014-06-25 10:37:00 AM
So, are you a drummer, or are you a percussionist?
 
2014-06-25 10:38:38 AM
Counterpoint: I play the piano.
 
2014-06-25 10:39:03 AM
What do you call someone who likes to hang out with the band but knows nothing about music?

The drummer
 
2014-06-25 10:39:18 AM
What's the last thing a stripper does with her asshole before she goes to work?

Gives him his drum sticks and drops him off at band practice.
 
2014-06-25 10:39:50 AM
Did you hear about the bassist that locked his keys in his car?

It took him three hours to get the drummer out.
 
2014-06-25 10:39:53 AM
How can you tell the stage is level?

When the drummer's drooling from both sides of his mouth.
 
2014-06-25 10:41:37 AM

Cheron: What do you...

Pangea: What's the last ...

pounddawg: Did you hear...

FormlessOne: How can you tell...


Within less than a minute. That's amazing.
 
2014-06-25 10:44:33 AM

FormlessOne: How can you tell the stage is level?

When the drummer's drooling from both sides of his mouth.


It's funny because our drummer drools sometimes.

/just texted this joke to the rest of the band
 
2014-06-25 10:45:16 AM

FormlessOne: Cheron: What do you...
Pangea: What's the last ...
pounddawg: Did you hear...
FormlessOne: How can you tell...

Within less than a minute. That's amazing.


Teamwork.  Or syncopation.
 
2014-06-25 10:46:17 AM
www.decca.com

"I have been telling you that for 40 years!"
 
2014-06-25 10:46:54 AM
How many chords does the bass player know?

How many has the guitarist taught him?
 
2014-06-25 10:48:20 AM
How do you get a drummer off your porch?

Pay him for the pizza.
 
2014-06-25 10:48:28 AM

FormlessOne: Cheron: What do you...
Pangea: What's the last ...
pounddawg: Did you hear...
FormlessOne: How can you tell...

Within less than a minute. That's amazing.


What's the difference between a drummer and a pig?

A pig won't stay up all night trying to fark a drummer.
 
2014-06-25 10:49:20 AM
Have a look at the Pixies doc, loudQUIETloud.  When they reformed, the drummer was literally homeless.

The Jesus Lizard song "Mouth Breather"  was about Slint drummer, Britt Walford.

I leave my home, I leave for a couple weeks
I leave my home, I leave it in the care of a friend
Don't get me wrong, he's a nice guy, I like him just fine
But he's a mouth breather
Don't get me wrong, he's a nice guy, I like him just fine
But he's a mouth breather
I expect when I return, I return to some sort of order
Such is not the case, no, such is not the case
I leave my home, I leave for a couple weeks
I leave my home, I leave it in the care of a friend
Don't get me wrong, he's a nice guy, I like him just fine
But he is a mouth breather
I leave my home, I leave for a couple weeks
I leave my home, I leave it in the care of a friend
And in my basement, I found rainin' piss
And in my kitchen, I found my friend deceased
 
2014-06-25 10:50:41 AM
Musicians are sexy. This is a factual statement. You jelly?
 
2014-06-25 10:52:58 AM
Drummers aren't just mistaken for homeless people, they're also frequently mistaken for musicians.
 
2014-06-25 10:54:43 AM

Crass and Jaded Mother Farker: FormlessOne: Cheron: What do you...
Pangea: What's the last ...
pounddawg: Did you hear...
FormlessOne: How can you tell...

Within less than a minute. That's amazing.

What's the difference between a drummer and a pig?

A pig won't stay up all night trying to fark a drummer.


How can you tell a drummer's at your door?

He's knocking out of rhythm and comes in late.
 
2014-06-25 10:58:19 AM

Gulper Eel: Homeless? Excuse me?

[www.gq.com image 628x434]


Watts is essentially a jazz drummer, he doesn't count.

/pun may or may not be intended
 
2014-06-25 11:05:03 AM
In before the Neil Pert fanboys
 
2014-06-25 11:05:58 AM
img.fark.net

Then why does Pip get his hands on more bumper than a body shop?

/Not a drummer
 
2014-06-25 11:06:26 AM

walkerhound: In before the Neil Pert fanboys


That's no joke.  EVERY drummer I've known was in love with Neil Pert.
 
2014-06-25 11:10:14 AM

walkerhound: In before the Neil Pert fanboys


How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to screw the bulb in, and four to talk about how much better Neil Peart coulda done it.
 
2014-06-25 11:12:27 AM
Laugh all you want, but drummers nail top shelf trim

Ringo, hottest wife in the band:

www.bellazon.com

Tommy Lee

img2-3.timeinc.net

Travis Barker

cbsdetroit.files.wordpress.com

David grohl
img2-1.timeinc.net
 
2014-06-25 11:14:07 AM

Gunderson: Ringo, hottest wife in the band:


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-06-25 11:14:52 AM
Yah!  I'm sexy because science says so and stuff!  But I've been married for 22 years and I love my wife so that kinda doesn't matter anyway.

/Singer in a cheesy 80's Alternative cover band.
//If you don't play music, you should.  It is fun!
///Slashies for the drummer who plays an electronic kit so he's smarter than average.
 
2014-06-25 11:16:24 AM
my drummer hates Neil Peart
Probably because Neil plays with technique, timing, and some finesse, instead of pounding the skins at an ever increasing rate and volume, never caring if what he is doing works for the song being played.
 
2014-06-25 11:19:12 AM

Tyrone Slothrop: Gulper Eel: Homeless? Excuse me?

[www.gq.com image 628x434]

Watts is essentially a jazz drummer, he doesn't count.

/pun may or may not be intended


I read where he counts.
 
2014-06-25 11:21:22 AM

stupiddream: Yah!  I'm sexy because science says so and stuff!  But I've been married for 22 years and I love my wife so that kinda doesn't matter anyway.

/Singer in a cheesy 80's Alternative cover band.
//If you don't play music, you should.  It is fun!
///Slashies for the drummer who plays an electronic kit so he's smarter than average.


Don't put yourself down, dude. One of the most fun bands I follow and go out to see more than once a year is a cheesy 80's cover band.
 
2014-06-25 11:21:29 AM

stupiddream: Slashies for the drummer who plays an electronic kit


Ouch.
 
2014-06-25 11:22:15 AM
So, a drummer got sick and tired of all of the dumb drummer jokes. He goes to the music store looking to find a new instrument to play. He wanders around for a long time, looking at guitars, basses, flutes, clarinets, trumpets, and trombones. Eventually, he's the last person in the store, and the owner's looking to close up, tapping his feet (in better rhythm than the drummer usually manages, I might add), and says, "Hey, buddy, you gonna buy something?"

And just then, the angels start singing and the drummer knows which instrument he wants to buy. "Yeah! That one, in the corner! I want to buy the accordion."

The owner shakes his head, and says, "You're a drummer, aren't you?"

"Yeah! How'd you know?"

"That's the radiator!"

And as a bonus, since I play violin: What's bigger, a violin or a viola? They're the same size, violinists heads are just bigger, so it seems small in comparison."
 
2014-06-25 11:22:27 AM

KatjaMouse: Gunderson: Ringo, hottest wife in the band:

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 497x750]


Reminds me of Allan Sherman's "Pop Hates the Beatles":
Ringo is the one with the drum,
The others all play with him.
It shows you what a boy can become
Without a sense of rhythm.

// apparently, Lennon was being rather tongue-in-cheek, as the whole reason Ringo was hired in the first place was that he was the best session drummer in town
// maybe not flashy, but a human metronome
 
2014-06-25 11:22:35 AM
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-06-25 11:22:41 AM
If you've ever played in a band with a crappy drummer?

At least you can turn guitar, bass, and vocals down in the mix.  Drums, yea, not so much.
 
2014-06-25 11:23:05 AM
I so have a great story to tell.  But because of the main guy involved, his being very well known, I kinda can't.

I just thought I'd tell you that.

Anyway...  I've played with all manner of drummers from really crappy and inconsistent, to just really amazing.
The best ones are those that will not stop playing even in light of an obvious screw up.  I played with one guy who's pedal fell apart during the first song.  He used the other pedal for a couple of songs, until he got a break and was able to fix the problem.  Not even us in the band knew he was having problems.

That's the mark of a pro right there.
 
2014-06-25 11:26:04 AM
Do a GIS for "drummer groupies"--the first row doesn't even contain any pictures of human beings (or living things at all).
 
2014-06-25 11:27:09 AM

EdNortonsTwin: If you've ever played in a band with a crappy drummer?

At least you can turn guitar, bass, and vocals down in the mix.  Drums, yea, not so much.


Actually - worse yet...  A drummer who is doing fine, but the other instrument NOT following the drummer.
I was at my daughter's school concert a few weeks ago.  There is this 90 year old woman who accompanies the chorus on piano.  She does fine on her own.
But for one song, they added a drummer into the mix.  She was good, and kept a solid beat.  But the piano player refused to acknowledge that she was even playing with someone else.  She just kept her own time regardless of the drummer.  And you rally can't blame the kid on the drums.  She likely couldn't hear the piano well enough to adjust.

That was very hard to listen to.  It was so disjointed.  Like a ripping wall of noise.
 
2014-06-25 11:29:09 AM

EdNortonsTwin: At least you can turn guitar, bass, and vocals down in the mix.  Drums, yea, not so much.


When I was younger and still the churchgoing type, I joined the "music ministry". Essentially, it made church tolerable- I was basically "in the band". We bought a plexiglass cage for our drummer so that we could actually turn him down in the mix (the guy was a good drummer, but he was of the "BANG DRUMS" mentality, so he went to  town on those drums).

A few years back, I was in a band where our drummer played on a junkyard kit- old gas tanks and pipes and shiat. That generally needed to be miked, too. We kept a bass drum set up like a tympani, and for our opening, we wouldn't announce ourselves or welcome the crowd, the drummer and the bass player would just start with four mallets, laying out a beat pattern. They'd start real soft, and gradually build until they're slamming down on the drum with all their might. We'd mike that, too, because it let us make the entire venue just farking  shake with fury. Then we launched into our set, which was a solid wall of music with no breaks, with a style that was someplace between Coil and the Swans. We were so unkind to our audience, but we always had a good turnout, for a no-name band playing in Albany, NY.

I miss being in a band. I need to fix this.
 
2014-06-25 11:29:15 AM

Dr Dreidel: KatjaMouse: Gunderson: Ringo, hottest wife in the band:

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 497x750]

Reminds me of Allan Sherman's "Pop Hates the Beatles":
Ringo is the one with the drum,
The others all play with him.
It shows you what a boy can become
Without a sense of rhythm.

// apparently, Lennon was being rather tongue-in-cheek, as the whole reason Ringo was hired in the first place was that he was the best session drummer in town
// maybe not flashy, but a human metronome


Flashy drummers almost always kinda suck (at least on a local semi-pro level). I'll take a pro with steady rhythm and good feel over "Dude, check out this crazy fill" every damn time.
 
2014-06-25 11:29:29 AM
What was the last thing the drummer ever said?

"Hey guys, I have an idea for a song..."
 
2014-06-25 11:30:29 AM

Mouthwatering_Monkeys: my drummer hates Neil Peart
Probably because Neil plays with technique, timing, and some finesse, instead of pounding the skins at an ever increasing rate and volume, never caring if what he is doing works for the song being played.


Neil Peart couldn't drum his way out of a paper bag
 
2014-06-25 11:30:53 AM

durbnpoisn: I so have a great story to tell.  But because of the main guy involved, his being very well known, I kinda can't.

I just thought I'd tell you that.

Anyway...  I've played with all manner of drummers from really crappy and inconsistent, to just really amazing.
The best ones are those that will not stop playing even in light of an obvious screw up.  I played with one guy who's pedal fell apart during the first song.  He used the other pedal for a couple of songs, until he got a break and was able to fix the problem.  Not even us in the band knew he was having problems.

That's the mark of a pro right there.


We had a drummer whose ... what are they called, frame?  It was one piece that held all of his instruments.  Anyway, a piece of it broke during the show and half the kit fell off the stage.  He grabbed it as it fell, managed to pull it with his foot, and keep playing until the end of the song.

(I then had to come up with a means of holding the kit together until the end of the show... which it did until the second-to-last song...)
 
2014-06-25 11:32:21 AM
What is the difference between a musician and a large pepperoni pizza?

The pizza can feed a family of four...
 
2014-06-25 11:33:06 AM
stupiddream:
///Slashies for the drummer who plays an electronic kit

It's all good, Josh Freese played electronic drums.
 
2014-06-25 11:36:50 AM
Forget all that macho shiat and learn how to play guitar!
 
2014-06-25 11:37:48 AM

durbnpoisn: EdNortonsTwin: Have you ever played in a band with a crappy drummer?

At least you can turn guitar, bass, and vocals down in the mix.  Drums, yea, not so much.

Actually - worse yet...  A drummer who is doing fine, but the other instrument NOT following the drummer.
I was at my daughter's school concert a few weeks ago.  There is this 90 year old woman who accompanies the chorus on piano.  She does fine on her own.
But for one song, they added a drummer into the mix.  She was good, and kept a solid beat.  But the piano player refused to acknowledge that she was even playing with someone else.  She just kept her own time regardless of the drummer.  And you rally can't blame the kid on the drums.  She likely couldn't hear the piano well enough to adjust.

That was very hard to listen to.  It was so disjointed.  Like a ripping wall of noise.


It all revolves around the drummer - I've never encountered a situation where the band did not follow the drummer unless the drummer was a fark-up.

Petpeeve:  Drummer whose kick drum sounds like tennis shoes in a dryer

Playing with a great drummer is truly exhilarating.

Fun fact:  One of 12 notes on your bass will cause the drummers snare to rattle uncontrollably.  Always a fun way to fark with a drummer who isn't aware of such.
 
2014-06-25 11:38:03 AM
Most drummers have difficulties reading music. Rick Allen is just stumped.
 
2014-06-25 11:40:15 AM
Years ago, when I was in a band, we locked the keys to our van inside the van while we were unloading our gear. It took us three hours to get our drummer out.
 
2014-06-25 11:42:33 AM

KatjaMouse: Don't put yourself down, dude. One of the most fun bands I follow and go out to see more than once a year is a cheesy 80's cover band.


Oh, don't get me wrong, I love being this band.  I used to play in an all original band back in the late 90's and early 00's and that was cool.  But I took 10 years off because of life and kids.  Now were just a bunch of old guys playing covers that we like and doing it for fun and it is a blast.

Andric: stupiddream: Slashies for the drummer who plays an electronic kit

Ouch.


I consider Slashies to be a compliment.  Our drummer rocks and we can turn him down!  His kit is also perfect for the new wave we play.
 
2014-06-25 11:48:08 AM
I'll take the from-the-gut drumming of Moon and Baker over highly technical drumming any day of the week.
 
2014-06-25 11:48:31 AM
Drummers are not always homeless. Sometimes they have girlfriends.
 
2014-06-25 11:50:06 AM

Gunderson: Laugh all you want, but drummers nail top shelf trim

Ringo, hottest wife in the band:

[www.bellazon.com image 290x400]

Tommy Lee

[img2-3.timeinc.net image 395x315]

Travis Barker

[cbsdetroit.files.wordpress.com image 400x349]

David grohl
[img2-1.timeinc.net image 240x320]


Dave Grohl isn't a drummer, hes a god.

That being said... Them Crooked Vultures is awesome.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXrwFBG7-7s&feature=kp  Also, Songs for the Deaf is one of the best albums ever.
 
2014-06-25 11:55:42 AM
Dead sexy.
manolomen.com
 
2014-06-25 11:57:43 AM

EdNortonsTwin: durbnpoisn: EdNortonsTwin: Have you ever played in a band with a crappy drummer?

At least you can turn guitar, bass, and vocals down in the mix.  Drums, yea, not so much.

Actually - worse yet...  A drummer who is doing fine, but the other instrument NOT following the drummer.
I was at my daughter's school concert a few weeks ago.  There is this 90 year old woman who accompanies the chorus on piano.  She does fine on her own.
But for one song, they added a drummer into the mix.  She was good, and kept a solid beat.  But the piano player refused to acknowledge that she was even playing with someone else.  She just kept her own time regardless of the drummer.  And you rally can't blame the kid on the drums.  She likely couldn't hear the piano well enough to adjust.

That was very hard to listen to.  It was so disjointed.  Like a ripping wall of noise.

It all revolves around the drummer - I've never encountered a situation where the band did not follow the drummer unless the drummer was a fark-up.

Petpeeve:  Drummer whose kick drum sounds like tennis shoes in a dryer

Playing with a great drummer is truly exhilarating.

Fun fact:  One of 12 notes on your bass will cause the drummers snare to rattle uncontrollably.  Always a fun way to fark with a drummer who isn't aware of such.


Yeah, the last band I played with, the drummer was just truly excellent.
When I first joined the band, we were rehearsing in the bass player's livingroom.  The drummer brought a little electric practice kit.  I didn't actually hear him on a real kit until we played live for the first time.  That was wild.

But I remember one time, we were in a rehearsal studio in NYC.  I happened to be standing next to him, and for the first time, I really got to see and hear him play.  I was blown away.  The dude could play anything.  And in the true sense of a percussionist, he uses the high-hat correctly, which, as you should know, is very important.

Hey, you know what... I really don't care if anyone here knows what band I'm talking about.  I've been out of it for long enough...  Here is us playing a Springsteen cover.  Which is appropriate considering the venue and the crowd.  Half the guys on the stage aren't even regular members of the band.  I'm the guy off on the side with the white Charvel.
Bar A at the Jersey Shore
 
2014-06-25 12:00:11 PM
i343.photobucket.com
 
2014-06-25 12:01:25 PM

stupiddream: KatjaMouse: Don't put yourself down, dude. One of the most fun bands I follow and go out to see more than once a year is a cheesy 80's cover band.

Oh, don't get me wrong, I love being this band.  I used to play in an all original band back in the late 90's and early 00's and that was cool.  But I took 10 years off because of life and kids.  Now were just a bunch of old guys playing covers that we like and doing it for fun and it is a blast.

Andric: stupiddream: Slashies for the drummer who plays an electronic kit

Ouch.

I consider Slashies to be a compliment.  Our drummer rocks and we can turn him down!  His kit is also perfect for the new wave we play.


Yep. I bought an electronic kit a year ago (not a drummer) just to fool around with, but it's turned out great to have around when people who can actually play drums come over. It's nice to be able to play with a drummer without everyone needing ear protection.
 
2014-06-25 12:18:34 PM

Jory: What is the difference between a musician and a large pepperoni pizza?

The pizza can feed a family of four...


I heard that joke specifically about drummers.  Amy Rigby told it in the middle of her song "Tonight I'm Gonna Give the Drummer Some." She was opening for Warren Zevon years ago.

From the video:  How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb? 17.  1 to hold the bulb, and 16 to drink so much that the room spins around.
 
2014-06-25 12:18:53 PM
Ginger Baker was the one who said Keith Moon kept time like a pair of tennis shoes in a dryer.
I can't see how anyone tolerates that guy. What a dick.

David Lee Roth said the way to tell Alex Van Halen was at the door was the knocking speeds up.

Drummers. Ugh.  A good one (and they are rare) will make the lamest band sound good.
A bad one (and they are everywhere) will wreck the best band around.

Me, I'm just middlin'. I'd be great by now but I started playing guitar and bass. Oops. Gateway drugs.

/ So many drummers, so little time.
 
2014-06-25 12:25:54 PM
I had no idea there were so many musician jokes. I just recently heard the one about "what do you all a musician with no girlfriend?", thought it was amazing and original, told it one of my "musician" friends. He was not amused. Maybe because he'd heard it 100 times before, because that's funny.
 
2014-06-25 12:28:57 PM
we know we are.
 
2014-06-25 12:29:41 PM

Slypork: Most drummers have difficulties reading music. Rick Allen is just stumped.


Peter Criss of KISS couldn't read music at all.
 
2014-06-25 12:33:15 PM

EdNortonsTwin: If you've ever played in a band with a crappy drummer?

At least you can turn guitar, bass, and vocals down in the mix.  Drums, yea, not so much.


I played in a band with a drummer that had to hit a cymbal twice per measure though out the entire song, every song.  The first time I thought he was just being a dick to the new guy.  The second time I thought he thought he was funny the first time he did it so he did it again, the third time I told him he sucked in front his friends (other band members) then packed up my base and left after two songs.
 
2014-06-25 12:37:11 PM
What's the difference between a drummer and a large pizza?
A large pizza can feed a family of four!

What do you call a drummer that just broke up with his girlfriend?
Homeless!
 
2014-06-25 12:37:53 PM

Fissile: Slypork: Most drummers have difficulties reading music. Rick Allen is just stumped.

Peter Criss of KISS couldn't read music at all.


Niether can Adrian Belew or at least he couldn't while he played with Zappa.
 
2014-06-25 12:38:01 PM
I'll just leave this here to counter all the drummer jokes.

Drummers are smarter than you.
 
2014-06-25 12:39:18 PM
And that is a smoking pic of Meg White.
 
2014-06-25 12:40:44 PM
FU all

/drummer
 
2014-06-25 12:42:25 PM
Minimalist drummers are the way to go IMHO. The last guy I played with had Kick, snare, and a floor tom, with a hi-hat, a ride, and one crash. It was all about the nuances.

.....and the fact that he could make one kick drum pedal sound like 2.
 
2014-06-25 12:42:31 PM
How important can a drummer be? Def Leppard's drummer lost an arm, and the rest of the band went "Eh. No biggie."
 
2014-06-25 12:46:41 PM
BTW -- TFA mentioned Händel's fugue in E minor.  All I know is Bach's fugue in E minor, I am not familiar with Händel's.  Was it just the author taking some liberties with Liszt and I'm just being pedantic?
 
2014-06-25 12:49:49 PM

Booyaxe: Minimalist drummers are the way to go IMHO. The last guy I played with had Kick, snare, and a floor tom, with a hi-hat, a ride, and one crash. It was all about the nuances.

.....and the fact that he could make one kick drum pedal sound like 2.


So you mean minimalist drum setup, not drumming.
 
2014-06-25 12:50:24 PM
I'm not the sharpest crayon in the shed.

I didn't know this song title was about this old penist. pianist. sheesh.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uF3reVVUbio
 
2014-06-25 01:05:26 PM

Booyaxe: Minimalist drummers are the way to go IMHO


The sound of one hand clapping?
 
2014-06-25 01:09:07 PM

EdNortonsTwin: If you've ever played in a band with a crappy drummer?

At least you can turn guitar, bass, and vocals down in the mix.  Drums, yea, not so much.


That's why you never let the drummer in the room during mixing.

/i should be louder!
 
2014-06-25 01:24:33 PM

milowitz: Booyaxe: Minimalist drummers are the way to go IMHO. The last guy I played with had Kick, snare, and a floor tom, with a hi-hat, a ride, and one crash. It was all about the nuances.

.....and the fact that he could make one kick drum pedal sound like 2.

So you mean minimalist drum setup, not drumming.


Both, actually. A lot of drummers will throw in fills all over the place. This guy would put a fill in at exactly the right time. He would maybe have only 4-5 per song.
 
2014-06-25 01:31:34 PM
Me to drummer: Say it with me again. Louder does not mean faster. Faster does not mean louder.

AGAIN!
 
2014-06-25 01:32:36 PM

Muta: EdNortonsTwin: If you've ever played in a band with a crappy drummer?

At least you can turn guitar, bass, and vocals down in the mix.  Drums, yea, not so much.

I played in a band with a drummer that had to hit a cymbal twice per measure though out the entire song, every song.  The first time I thought he was just being a dick to the new guy.  The second time I thought he thought he was funny the first time he did it so he did it again, the third time I told him he sucked in front his friends (other band members) then packed up my base and left after two songs.


Marine Core like typing detected.

/oh no! where will they ever find someone else who can play bass?
 
2014-06-25 01:50:53 PM
You're welcome to white knight the crappy drummer all you want and I am sorry bass isn't list of approved musical instruments.  It was clear after three practices that the others were more interested making noise than music.  I had other goals.
 
2014-06-25 01:52:05 PM

skinink: How important can a drummer be? Def Leppard's drummer lost an arm, and the rest of the band went "Eh. No biggie."


did he ever find it again? Those musicians do way too many drugs.
 
2014-06-25 02:05:50 PM

Dancin_In_Anson: [i1123.photobucket.com image 351x332]


1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-06-25 02:13:14 PM
I'm one of those drummers who actually learned the instrument, I can read drum music (albeit slowly, I rarely need to for popular music), I've taken lessons from some awesome instructors, I know all the rudiments & can play music from lounge standards with brushes (guys, learn to swing your brushes, they're not just quiet sticks) to full-on balls-to-the-wall rock 'n roll at full volume. I have very good equipment (3 sets) & I'm anal about keeping them in perfect shape, along with being well-tuned.

That & $1.50'll get me a cup of coffee :).
 
2014-06-25 02:14:03 PM
I see that all the egos and "band leaders" have chimed in.
 
2014-06-25 02:14:49 PM
The problem with all these not sexy drummers is that they are wearing clothes.
 
2014-06-25 02:17:13 PM

mdeesnuts: Booyaxe: Minimalist drummers are the way to go IMHO

The sound of one hand clapping?


Yeah, that's a Rick Allen ovation.
 
2014-06-25 02:22:05 PM

Muta: You're welcome to white knight the crappy drummer all you want and I am sorry bass isn't list of approved musical instruments.  It was clear after three practices that the others were more interested making noise than music.  I had other goals.


Just giving you a hard time.

This thread needs less Neil Peart and more Steve Gadd.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yfg5QddiPh4
 
2014-06-25 02:49:46 PM
Couldn't read music well, hired drummers who could to go through new charts with him, played the parts perfectly after hearing them once:  http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=buddy+rich&FORM=VIRE4#view=detail & mid=0FDB8568671F54866A820FDB8568671F54866A82
 
2014-06-25 02:52:54 PM
Why do lead singers stand on their front porch so long?  They can never find the key.
 
2014-06-25 03:18:22 PM
"Do you want me to play too fast or too slow?"
Link Link Link
Link Link
Link
 
2014-06-25 03:25:19 PM
No love for Sandy Nelson?
 
2014-06-25 03:25:36 PM

rockforever: Gunderson: Laugh all you want, but drummers nail top shelf trim

Ringo, hottest wife in the band:

[www.bellazon.com image 290x400]

Tommy Lee

[img2-3.timeinc.net image 395x315]

Travis Barker

[cbsdetroit.files.wordpress.com image 400x349]

David grohl
[img2-1.timeinc.net image 240x320]

Dave Grohl isn't a drummer, hes a god.

That being said... Them Crooked Vultures is awesome.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXrwFBG7-7s&feature=kp  Also, Songs for the Deaf is one of the best albums ever.


i think it's track #4 that has a sweet intro of guitar and not quite random drumming that freaking kicks ass as one of the best intros to a song ever

/have more cd's than mp3's
/no 8 track though
/third slashie is a hipster vinyl douche
 
2014-06-25 04:09:00 PM
How can you tell when there's a drummer knocking on your door?

The knocking speeds up and slows down.
 
2014-06-25 04:12:23 PM
A guy decides, on a whim, that he'd like to learn to play bass. He buys himself a cheap-o bass and calls the first bass teacher he finds in the phone book, and arranges a lesson.

When he arrives, the teacher asks him, "Have you ever had any musical training at all? Piano, theory, anything?"

"No," says the guy. "This is the first time I've ever even held an instrument in my hands."

"Okay," says the teacher, "we'll start at the beginning. I just want you to practice playing the open 'E' string, and the open 'A' string. E, A, E, A. Then we'll move on."

The guy agrees, and practices like he's been told.

A week passes, and the guy doesn't show up for his next lesson, or the next, or the one after that. "I guess he wasn't interested," thought the teacher.

A few weeks later, the teacher bumps into the guy on the street, and says, "Say, how come you never came back for your second lesson?"

"Oh, man," says the guy, "I got so many gigs."
 
2014-06-25 05:35:22 PM

Mambo Bananapatch: How can you tell when there's a drummer knocking on your door?

The knocking speeds up and slows down.


How do you know when a singer is at your door?

He doesn't know when to come in.

/singer
//keyboardist
///guitarist
////bassist
//Chapman Stickist
//pretty much everything elseist
//can't play drums to save my life
 
2014-06-25 05:47:22 PM

skinink: How important can a drummer be? Def Leppard's drummer lost an arm, and the rest of the band went "Eh. No biggie."


Mutt Lange produces them, so not important. As long as he can play "boom boom BANG! boom boom BANG!", he's in like Flynn.

For example:

- Pour Some Sugar On Me - Def Leppard
- Lovin' Every Minute Of It - Loverboy
- Any Man Of Mine - Shania Twain
 
2014-06-25 08:32:03 PM

LewDux: "Do you want me to play too fast or too slow?"
Link Link Link
Link Link
Link


Ok, I'm only two links in but I'm already blown away by Moloko. This is some kick ass stuff!

/this is coming from a devout prog-metalhead
 
2014-06-25 11:14:25 PM
I played with four drummers in my band back in the day. Two were awesome, in different ways, and it was a pleasure trading the main beat back and forth between drums and bass without hiccup. I had some sublime moments with those two guys. Another was only mediocre, he wasn't terrible, just boring and unimaginative. The fourth one... well, it's a bad sign when your bass player has to count off the measures to let you know when to come back in.
 
2014-06-26 01:02:02 AM
Sexy drummer thread!

i28.photobucket.com
 
2014-06-26 10:19:57 PM
There are a lot of drummers that I love to listen to and watch. Bass players too, and piano players and guitarists and singers... I thoroughly enjoy music and have never thought one instrument was 'better' than the others. There are songs that have an amazing guitar riff that just make my head swim while hearing it. There are also songs that have some of the greatest drumming in them, able to reset my heartbeat and impossible to stay still listening to. I also love to hear a great meaty bass line that just quivers down low and pulses in the song.

There are certain passages of music that just kill me with their perfection, now this can be lyrics that say the perfect thing with perfect words, a few bars of an intro on piano or a voice that just fills me with, oh, everything... It can be anything that speaks to me. Those are entirely subjective and unique to every person.

As for all the jokes about this type of musician or that type, I'm sure there are ample examples for whatever instrument a person plays, including vox. I'm just glad that I've gotten to be on the receiving end of their efforts.

And if I'm completely honest, I do like the pretty, dirty boys that populate music with their ripped jeans, flowing manes and "I'll Beastfark you six ways from Sunday if I get the chance" looks. So there's that! ;)
 
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