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(KHOU Houston)   Woman bemoans the loss of her special needs snake. "This has been really difficult for me"   (khou.com) divider line 72
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4177 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jun 2014 at 9:11 AM (3 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



72 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-06-25 01:19:41 AM
I got yer special needs snake RIGHT HERE!
 
2014-06-25 08:56:12 AM
I'll get the lights.
 
2014-06-25 08:59:55 AM
They're badgering the poor woman.  This is destined to mushroom into a case for freedom.
 
2014-06-25 09:09:10 AM
She's not unattractive. I don't think there would be any potential issues entering into a physical relationship with her.

Or do I make poor decisions?
 
2014-06-25 09:11:35 AM

Gonz: She's not unattractive. I don't think there would be any potential issues entering into a physical relationship with her.

Or do I make poor decisions?


Given her house I'd be afraid of the honey-do list you'd inevitably face.
 
2014-06-25 09:15:01 AM
Phallic symbols anyone?
 
2014-06-25 09:15:03 AM

baconbeard: Because if everyone is special, then no one is.


But...snakes!
 
2014-06-25 09:15:19 AM

Diogenes: Given her house I'd be afraid of the honey-do list you'd inevitably face.


The house is kind of a mess, but she seems fairly reasonable. I was expecting someone much crazier.

"I do love my animals enough to let them go, in hopes that they have bigger enclosures and a happier life," she told the judge in the hearing. "I've been with them for 15 years. They've been all that I've known for quite a while. And they mean everything to me."
 
2014-06-25 09:21:11 AM
a2.files.saymedia-content.com
 
2014-06-25 09:21:15 AM

Barrineau kept the snakes, some of which were more than 15 feet long, mainly in small containers in a back bedroom, authorities said. Some of them showed signs of malnourishment, testimony indicated, and one of them had a broken back.


Yeah, she loved them SO MUCH.

I think she's got the herp-derp.
 
2014-06-25 09:21:29 AM
Poor, crazy, sorta hot lady...
That rhymed.
 
2014-06-25 09:21:53 AM
Only in Texas.
 
2014-06-25 09:22:06 AM

nucular bum: I got yer special needs snake RIGHT HERE!


Damn, beat me to it.

/She's hot, and will probably become a snake themed Batman villain.
 
2014-06-25 09:22:51 AM

I_Am_Weasel: They're badgering the poor woman.  This is destined to mushroom into a case for freedom.


You sneaky bastard.
 
2014-06-25 09:23:31 AM

cryinoutloud: The house is kind of a mess, but she seems fairly reasonable. I was expecting someone much crazier.


Yeah, she just seems sad.  But many hoarders make me sad.
 
2014-06-25 09:23:34 AM

darwinpolice: I_Am_Weasel: They're badgering the poor woman.  This is destined to mushroom into a case for freedom.

You sneaky bastard.


SNAAAAAKE!
 
2014-06-25 09:25:33 AM
I bet that place smells as bad as a cat lady's house in its own reptilian way.

Special needs snake:

cdnimg.visualizeus.com
 
2014-06-25 09:26:05 AM
That is sad.  Was this the special needs snake that inspired the  "Don't Laugh At Me" tea party Gadsden flags?
 
2014-06-25 09:27:36 AM

Englebert Slaptyback: Barrineau kept the snakes, some of which were more than 15 feet long, mainly in small containers in a back bedroom, authorities said. Some of them showed signs of malnourishment, testimony indicated, and one of them had a broken back.


Yeah, she loved them SO MUCH.

I think she's got the herp-derp.


I like what you did here.
 
2014-06-25 09:28:17 AM
But do they boogie? Do they do the tube snake boogie?
 
2014-06-25 09:28:32 AM

baconbeard: Because if everyone is special, then no one is.


Uh huh. And I bet you're an island of self-reliance, needing no one. You only post on Fark to pass your wisdom on to the rest of us, out of pity.

People love their pets. They get attached to them, and they depend on them to fulfill some of their emotional needs. Maybe a big snake is an odd thing to get attached to, but it's better than having an emotional relationship with a life-like baby doll, or the bears you feed in the back yard, or a giant spider that you harvest bugs for and put them into its web. Because if it was a giant spider--fark, man, lock her up.
 
2014-06-25 09:28:59 AM

I_Am_Weasel: They're badgering the poor woman.  This is destined to mushroom into a case for freedom.


I gtaforums.comSEE gtaforums.comWHAT  gtaforums.com YOU gtaforums.comDID gtaforums.comTHERE
 
2014-06-25 09:32:55 AM
basementrejects.com
 
2014-06-25 09:34:39 AM

cryinoutloud: baconbeard: Because if everyone is special, then no one is.

Uh huh. And I bet you're an island of self-reliance, needing no one. You only post on Fark to pass your wisdom on to the rest of us, out of pity.

People love their pets. They get attached to them, and they depend on them to fulfill some of their emotional needs. Maybe a big snake is an odd thing to get attached to, but it's better than having an emotional relationship with a life-like baby doll, or the bears you feed in the back yard, or a giant spider that you harvest bugs for and put them into its web. Because if it was a giant spider--fark, man, lock her up.


You miss the point. The snakes had outgrown her, physical and/or financial, ability to look after them. Cages too small. Snakes under nourished.
 
2014-06-25 09:34:53 AM
My special needs snake likes to be handled maybe your is broken.
 
2014-06-25 09:34:58 AM
img.fark.net
 
2014-06-25 09:38:46 AM

cryinoutloud: baconbeard: Because if everyone is special, then no one is.

Uh huh. And I bet you're an island of self-reliance, needing no one. You only post on Fark to pass your wisdom on to the rest of us, out of pity.

People love their pets. They get attached to them, and they depend on them to fulfill some of their emotional needs. Maybe a big snake is an odd thing to get attached to, but it's better than having an emotional relationship with a life-like baby doll, or the bears you feed in the back yard, or a giant spider that you harvest bugs for and put them into its web. Because if it was a giant spider--fark, man, lock her up.


Well, now you did it. SyFy will now be forced to release a life-like baby doll spider snake bear hybrid movie. I hope you're happy with yourself.
 
2014-06-25 09:42:03 AM
Pink and wet, they make the best kind of pet!
 
2014-06-25 09:42:38 AM
Has anyone made any dick jokes yet? Because this headline is leaving itself wide-open for dick jokes.
 
2014-06-25 09:44:04 AM
Snake people, they live near the lake, people.

They're under Mount Everest and the Oke Fenoke swamp.
 
2014-06-25 09:49:03 AM
Exsqueeze me?  Baking powder?

i57.tinypic.com
 
2014-06-25 09:50:23 AM

nucular bum: I got yer special needs snake RIGHT HERE!


bearded clamorer: I'll get the lights.


And I will read no more.  Well done.
 
2014-06-25 09:52:07 AM
She could seize my snake.
 
2014-06-25 09:54:27 AM
Mmm mmm black snake crawlin' in my room.
Mmm mmm black snake crawlin' in my room,
Some pretty mama better come
And get this black snake soon.
 
2014-06-25 09:55:36 AM

nucular bum: I got yer special needs snake RIGHT HERE!


This bears reiteration. Here, gentlemen is where you don't stick your dick. Questions?
 
2014-06-25 10:01:51 AM

I_Am_Weasel: They're badgering the poor woman.  This is destined to mushroom into a case for freedom.


ISee what you did.webm
 
2014-06-25 10:01:56 AM
I am glad I get to be the one to do this reference:

Al Wilson "The Snake"


On her way to work one morning
Down the path along side the lake
A tender hearted woman saw a poor half frozen snake
His pretty colored skin had been all frosted with the dew
"Oh well," she cried, "I'll take you in and I'll take care of you"
"Take me in oh tender woman
Take me in, for heaven's sake
Take me in oh tender woman," sighed the snake

She wrapped him up all cozy in a curvature of silk
And then laid him by the fireside with some honey and some milk
Now she hurried home from work that night as soon as she arrived
She found that pretty snake she'd taking in had been revived
"Take me in, oh tender woman
Take me in, for heaven's sake
Take me in oh tender woman," sighed the snake

Now she clutched him to her bosom, "You're so beautiful," she cried
"But if I hadn't brought you in by now you might have died"
Now she stroked his pretty skin and then she kissed and held him tight
But instead of saying thanks, that snake gave her a vicious bite
"Take me in, oh tender woman
Take me in, for heaven's sake
Take me in oh tender woman," sighed the snake

"I saved you," cried that woman
"And you've bit me even, why?
You know your bite is poisonous and now I'm going to die"
"Oh shut up, silly woman," said the reptile with a grin
"You knew damn well I was a snake before you took me in
"Take me in, oh tender woman
Take me in, for heaven's sake
Take me in oh tender woman," sighed the snake
 
2014-06-25 10:02:50 AM
Why not. They have special needs gerbils and other crazy shiat.
 
2014-06-25 10:03:32 AM

jamspoon: You miss the point. The snakes had outgrown her, physical and/or financial, ability to look after them. Cages too small. Snakes under nourished.


No, not really. She loved her pets, and is kind of a mess (I bet she's all alone in the world, has no kids or boyfriend or anything). Her attachment to her pets made her unable to see that she wasn't taking good care of them. Pet hoarder people do this all the time, of course. This is not even as bad of a case as most.

I've always owned a lot of pets. I have a kid but I'm pretty alone in the world, and I am aware of it, especially when things get bad, which is often. I don't have any money, but I still have my pets. They don't go to the vet, they don't get their teeth cleaned, they don't get to go to doggie daycare (the stupidest farking thing every invented, IMO). But I take good care of my animals and they are all spoiled rotten. If things got really bad, the last thing I'd want to surrender is my pets--besides my kid, but he can go out on his own if he has to. In fact, the worse things got, the more I'd want to keep my pets around, even if I wasn't able to take good care of them. At least this lady is able to see that her babies need to go. A lot of hoarders can't see that. (And I don't even think she qualifies as a hoarder--things just got out of hand for her.)

That's why you frequently see homeless people with dogs, or even cats. They're the most important thing in their lives, despite all the hassle of owning a pet when you're on the streets. So if you're asking, "Why does that homeless person have a dog, when he can't even feed himself?" just remember that that dog might be the only thing standing between that guy and a shooting spree at Wal-Mart.
 
2014-06-25 10:15:45 AM

cryinoutloud: jamspoon: ... just remember that that dog might be the only thing standing between that guy and a shooting spree at Wal-Mart.


Is this supposed to be a bad thing?
 
2014-06-25 10:18:13 AM
The only snake I ever like was Snake Plissken.
 
2014-06-25 10:19:13 AM

Flakeloaf


I like what you did here.


*tips hat*
 
2014-06-25 10:21:30 AM

Englebert Slaptyback: Barrineau kept the snakes, some of which were more than 15 feet long, mainly in small containers in a back bedroom, authorities said. Some of them showed signs of malnourishment, testimony indicated, and one of them had a broken back.


Yeah, she loved them SO MUCH.

I think she's got the herp-derp.


"And though you can't snake with a broken back, at least you can polish the fenders...But if that's what you have in mind..."

/DRTFA...why the fark would you want a retarded snake to begin with?
 
2014-06-25 10:25:04 AM
www.badinia.com

That not fish...that snake!
 
2014-06-25 10:25:14 AM
cdn.thegloss.com
how can I be the first with this?
 
2014-06-25 10:25:29 AM
I want a special needs velociraptor.
 
2014-06-25 10:26:57 AM
 
2014-06-25 10:37:55 AM
You know who dropped the dime on her? The Crazy Cat Lady from down the street. They have had this rivalry thing going for years now.
 
2014-06-25 10:41:12 AM

Boo_Guy: cryinoutloud: jamspoon: ... just remember that that dog might be the only thing standing between that guy and a shooting spree at Wal-Mart.
Is this supposed to be a bad thing?


Well yes. I might be in there getting my groceries.

I watched this the other day. See, this guy was way too emotionally invested in his pet. And it didn't end well for him, or the snake.

misfit120.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-06-25 10:41:51 AM
www.wearysloth.com

Uhhmmmmmm
 
2014-06-25 10:44:25 AM
I don't what the correlation between the headline and the actual story is.  So, let's just go with the story.

It seems that she really didn't know what she was getting into with these things, and got overwhelmed.  It is really a good thing for the animals to be moved someplace that they can be better cared for.  This is assuming the idiots don't just euthanize them.  That would suck.

Even one of those animals can get very large, and be very expensive to feed.  15 of them?  Damn.  That's a lot.  Her budget on small, furry, cute animals must be astronomical.

I hope they end up in a zoo or something.  As for her, she should probably just get a more reasonable pet.  Like an iguana.  They got really big.  And all they eat is vegetables.
 
2014-06-25 10:46:56 AM
The authorities are violating her rights under ADA. If she declares it is her special needs service snake, then no on has a right to question her. The law says she only has to declare the snake as her service snake and she doesn't have to answer questions or provide proof of any kind. The very act of asking her a question is a violation of her rights. She should have just told the SPCA she refused to answer their questions and called the police. Her mental issues are a disability and if the snake provides her comfort for her bad dreams and emotional stability, then she is beyond questioning. Furthermore, she has the right to bring the snake anywhere she pleases without anyone daring to ask her any questions that might embarrass her. No one has a right to ask her about why she carries her 15 foot python into Walgreen's and they should be sued if they dare approach her and ask her anything. Also, it doesn't matter if the snake doesn't have a service vest on or has any documentation, it's a violation of her rights for anyone to ask. She only has to declare the snake is her service snake and people should intrinsically know this and only scumbag, disability hating, herp-a-derps who wipe their ass on the Constitution would dare violate her rights by asking.
 
Biv
2014-06-25 10:47:36 AM
I got a snake.
One time I fed it some beer.
It was sleethering this way and that.
It was all farked up.
 
2014-06-25 10:48:05 AM
was the snake black per chance?

www.lahiguera.net
 
2014-06-25 10:54:44 AM

fight club: The authorities are violating her rights under ADA. If she declares it is her special needs service snake, then no on has a right to question her. The law says she only has to declare the snake as her service snake and she doesn't have to answer questions or provide proof of any kind. The very act of asking her a question is a violation of her rights. She should have just told the SPCA she refused to answer their questions and called the police. Her mental issues are a disability and if the snake provides her comfort for her bad dreams and emotional stability, then she is beyond questioning. Furthermore, she has the right to bring the snake anywhere she pleases without anyone daring to ask her any questions that might embarrass her. No one has a right to ask her about why she carries her 15 foot python into Walgreen's and they should be sued if they dare approach her and ask her anything. Also, it doesn't matter if the snake doesn't have a service vest on or has any documentation, it's a violation of her rights for anyone to ask. She only has to declare the snake is her service snake and people should intrinsically know this and only scumbag, disability hating, herp-a-derps who wipe their ass on the Constitution would dare violate her rights by asking.


Not sure if serious...
 
2014-06-25 10:57:05 AM

freetomato: Sure sounds nasty.


And you went with Ray Wylie.

First beer's on me, if you're ever in South Texas.
 
2014-06-25 11:04:33 AM

nucular bum: I got yer special needs snake RIGHT HERE!

 
2014-06-25 11:06:39 AM
Lots of women moan about how much they need their snake, but trust me, it's only difficult in the beginning.
 
2014-06-25 11:19:01 AM

nucular bum: I got yer special needs snake RIGHT HERE!


s11.postimg.org

/Excuse me while I whip this post out a second time.
//Fark Fark's 1 meg size limit not liking a 1.1 meg gif.
 
2014-06-25 12:18:31 PM
img.fark.net
 
2014-06-25 12:22:46 PM

Rawhead Rex: fight club: The authorities are violating her rights under ADA. If she declares it is her special needs service snake, then no on has a right to question her. The law says she only has to declare the snake as her service snake and she doesn't have to answer questions or provide proof of any kind. The very act of asking her a question is a violation of her rights. She should have just told the SPCA she refused to answer their questions and called the police. Her mental issues are a disability and if the snake provides her comfort for her bad dreams and emotional stability, then she is beyond questioning. Furthermore, she has the right to bring the snake anywhere she pleases without anyone daring to ask her any questions that might embarrass her. No one has a right to ask her about why she carries her 15 foot python into Walgreen's and they should be sued if they dare approach her and ask her anything. Also, it doesn't matter if the snake doesn't have a service vest on or has any documentation, it's a violation of her rights for anyone to ask. She only has to declare the snake is her service snake and people should intrinsically know this and only scumbag, disability hating, herp-a-derps who wipe their ass on the Constitution would dare violate her rights by asking.

Not sure if serious...


You must have missed the Walgreens thread where it was declared that all you have to do us secretly click your heals, turn around twice, and say "service snake" three times, then if someone dares ask why you are bringing a snake into Walgreens, then you have a right to murder the manager's golden retriever and bury it in the woods. Or maybe in this case, feed it to the snake. As long as the snake helps with her bads dreams and comforts her, that's all that matters and no one has the right to ask her anything about her snake. It's the law!!!!
 
2014-06-25 12:52:03 PM

washington-babylon: I am glad I get to be the one to do this reference:

Al Wilson "The Snake"


Jeeze, please don't tell me he made any money off this blatant ripoff of the 2600 year-old tale  The Scorpion and The Frog...
 
2014-06-25 01:10:06 PM
funnyasduck.net
 
2014-06-25 01:12:57 PM
I'm still working on the concept of a special needs snake. I mean was it autistic? Was it missing a leg or something?
 
2014-06-25 01:13:17 PM

Biv: I got a snake.
One time I fed it some beer.
It was sleethering this way and that.
It was all farked up.


This is what I came here for.

/my neighbor's dog has a four inch clit.
 
2014-06-25 01:28:58 PM
If she was strapped for cash she could have gone into the massage business.
 
2014-06-25 01:57:28 PM

LZeitgeist: washington-babylon: I am glad I get to be the one to do this reference:

Al Wilson "The Snake"

Jeeze, please don't tell me he made any money off this blatant ripoff of the 2600 year-old tale  The Scorpion and The Frog...


He's not the only one who made money. Johnny Rivers also did a popular cover.
 
2014-06-25 02:18:23 PM

nucular bum: I got yer special needs snake RIGHT HERE!


25.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-06-25 02:25:37 PM

The Crepes of Wrath: But do they boogie? Do they do the tube snake boogie?


Not with that broken back and living off 30 calories a day, they won't!
 
2014-06-25 03:48:50 PM

Crass and Jaded Mother Farker: Englebert Slaptyback: Barrineau kept the snakes, some of which were more than 15 feet long, mainly in small containers in a back bedroom, authorities said. Some of them showed signs of malnourishment, testimony indicated, and one of them had a broken back.


Yeah, she loved them SO MUCH.

I think she's got the herp-derp.

"And though you can't snake with a broken back, at least you can polish the fenders...But if that's what you have in mind..."

/DRTFA...why the fark would you want a retarded snake to begin with?


Don't be insensitive. It's probably just a learning differability.
 
2014-06-25 03:57:23 PM

morg: Crass and Jaded Mother Farker: Englebert Slaptyback: Barrineau kept the snakes, some of which were more than 15 feet long, mainly in small containers in a back bedroom, authorities said. Some of them showed signs of malnourishment, testimony indicated, and one of them had a broken back.


Yeah, she loved them SO MUCH.

I think she's got the herp-derp.

"And though you can't snake with a broken back, at least you can polish the fenders...But if that's what you have in mind..."

/DRTFA...why the fark would you want a retarded snake to begin with?

Don't be insensitive. It's probably just a learning differability.


You're right...I guess that was pretty,

wait for it...

COLD BLOODED OF ME.
 
2014-06-25 04:32:18 PM

Maturin: I'm still working on the concept of a special needs snake. I mean was it autistic? Was it missing a leg or something?


I think it was missing all of them...
 
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