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(KTVQ Billings)   Montana woman slices her husband's throat after threatening to "cut him up" for peeing on the floor, then gives him a bottle of whiskey. But the mugshot is even better   (ktvq.com ) divider line
    More: Scary  
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23433 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Jun 2014 at 4:07 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-06-25 12:04:01 AM  
9 votes:
Old pee story:

Eons ago I agreed to spend a night with my ex-wife in Patpong (Bangkok's sex district) because my she grew up in Malaysia and she wanted me to see what all the hubub was about.  I remember being supremely unimpressed at the beginning of the evening because literally everything was a money chase - you'd get swamped the minute you spent any money at all.  And since we weren't looking for "company" it got boring after about 45 minutes.  But we were making our way through all the bars and clubs with a group of friends and right about 10:30pm my memory just flat out stopped.  I still maintain I got a drugged drink or bad liquor from somewhere, but I was out.  Don't remember a thing.  But my ex-wife does.

I was so out of it she took me back to the hotel at 11:30 when it was obvious I was done, and I rewarded her at 3am by getting up and peeing all over the bed, floor, and headboard, despite her attempts to get me to stop or at least turn around.  When I woke up the next morning I was in the middle of the floor with a wet back and she was asleep in the bathroom tub with all of the spare pillows and spare blankets from the closet creating a makeshift mattress.  I also had a splitting headache and a split lip, so I woke her up.

ME: "What happened to my lip?"
HER: "You wouldn't stop peeing on the bed, so I thought if I slapped you it would make you stop."
ME: "I was peeing on the bed? How farking hard did you slap me?"
HER: "The slap didn't stop you, so I punched you instead.  But that didn't stop you, either. And your teeth really farked up my hand."
ME: "Why does the back of my head hurt?"
HER "Because you slipped on your piss and fell on the floor.  You weren't peeing anymore so I went to sleep in the bathroom.  We have to find a doctor for my hand."

We did find a doctor for her hand, which didn't need stitches.  My lip needed two, and something in the back of my head still thinks she hit me with something else after her first punch.  But I don't remember.

Thailand:  when you absolutely must take home stories you can't tell your family.
2014-06-25 04:12:28 AM  
6 votes:

Lsherm: Old pee story:

Eons ago I agreed to spend a night with my ex-wife in Patpong (Bangkok's sex district) because my she grew up in Malaysia and she wanted me to see what all the hubub was about.  I remember being supremely unimpressed at the beginning of the evening because literally everything was a money chase - you'd get swamped the minute you spent any money at all.  And since we weren't looking for "company" it got boring after about 45 minutes.  But we were making our way through all the bars and clubs with a group of friends and right about 10:30pm my memory just flat out stopped.  I still maintain I got a drugged drink or bad liquor from somewhere, but I was out.  Don't remember a thing.  But my ex-wife does.

I was so out of it she took me back to the hotel at 11:30 when it was obvious I was done, and I rewarded her at 3am by getting up and peeing all over the bed, floor, and headboard, despite her attempts to get me to stop or at least turn around.  When I woke up the next morning I was in the middle of the floor with a wet back and she was asleep in the bathroom tub with all of the spare pillows and spare blankets from the closet creating a makeshift mattress.  I also had a splitting headache and a split lip, so I woke her up.

ME: "What happened to my lip?"
HER: "You wouldn't stop peeing on the bed, so I thought if I slapped you it would make you stop."
ME: "I was peeing on the bed? How farking hard did you slap me?"
HER: "The slap didn't stop you, so I punched you instead.  But that didn't stop you, either. And your teeth really farked up my hand."
ME: "Why does the back of my head hurt?"
HER "Because you slipped on your piss and fell on the floor.  You weren't peeing anymore so I went to sleep in the bathroom.  We have to find a doctor for my hand."

We did find a doctor for her hand, which didn't need stitches.  My lip needed two, and something in the back of my head still thinks she hit me with something else after her first punch.  But I don't remembe ...


37.media.tumblr.com
2014-06-24 11:55:08 PM  
5 votes:
www.ktvq.com

s3.yimg.com

Separated  at birth?
2014-06-25 05:53:20 AM  
4 votes:
3.bp.blogspot.com

/first thought
2014-06-25 04:42:15 AM  
4 votes:
www.schnittberichte.com
www.inpapasbasement.com
2014-06-24 11:23:51 PM  
4 votes:
There's no way the mugshot's bet-

<clicks link>

You win this round, subby
2014-06-25 06:06:20 AM  
3 votes:
www.weeatfilms.com
2014-06-24 11:56:01 PM  
3 votes:
She's been waiting for this moment...for all her life... Oh Lord..


d1oi7t5trwfj5d.cloudfront.net
2014-06-24 11:53:59 PM  
3 votes:
When did the vulture fark that woman's mother?
2014-06-25 07:37:12 AM  
2 votes:

Lsherm: Old pee story:

Eons ago I agreed to spend a night with my ex-wife in Patpong (Bangkok's sex district) because my she grew up in Malaysia and she wanted me to see what all the hubub was about. . . . .


2.bp.blogspot.com

2014-06-25 07:37:11 AM  
2 votes:

shortdarkandmeh: Lsherm: Old pee story:

Eons ago I agreed to spend a night with my ex-wife in Patpong (Bangkok's sex district) because my she grew up in Malaysia and she wanted me to see what all the hubub was about.  I remember being supremely unimpressed at the beginning of the evening because literally everything was a money chase - you'd get swamped the minute you spent any money at all.  And since we weren't looking for "company" it got boring after about 45 minutes.  But we were making our way through all the bars and clubs with a group of friends and right about 10:30pm my memory just flat out stopped.  I still maintain I got a drugged drink or bad liquor from somewhere, but I was out.  Don't remember a thing.  But my ex-wife does.

I was so out of it she took me back to the hotel at 11:30 when it was obvious I was done, and I rewarded her at 3am by getting up and peeing all over the bed, floor, and headboard, despite her attempts to get me to stop or at least turn around.  When I woke up the next morning I was in the middle of the floor with a wet back and she was asleep in the bathroom tub with all of the spare pillows and spare blankets from the closet creating a makeshift mattress.  I also had a splitting headache and a split lip, so I woke her up.

ME: "What happened to my lip?"
HER: "You wouldn't stop peeing on the bed, so I thought if I slapped you it would make you stop."
ME: "I was peeing on the bed? How farking hard did you slap me?"
HER: "The slap didn't stop you, so I punched you instead.  But that didn't stop you, either. And your teeth really farked up my hand."
ME: "Why does the back of my head hurt?"
HER "Because you slipped on your piss and fell on the floor.  You weren't peeing anymore so I went to sleep in the bathroom.  We have to find a doctor for my hand."

We did find a doctor for her hand, which didn't need stitches.  My lip needed two, and something in the back of my head still thinks she hit me with something else after her first punch.  But I don't remembe ...

Did it make you humble?


I was going to suggest he go back to his bars.... His temples... His massage parlors.

/the city had him
2014-06-24 10:42:04 PM  
2 votes:
That's a handsome woman. I wonder how her husband lasted so long before he sliced his own throat to escape the misery.
2014-06-25 03:27:38 PM  
1 vote:
Damn I've threatened some crazy shiat but I'd never actually do it. Unless of course he hit me and though he was going to get by with it then I'm grabbing the biggest knife/heavy item I can find and knocking/stabbing whatever I can hit.
2014-06-25 09:54:21 AM  
1 vote:
This is what magazine covers look like before they start airbrushing
2014-06-25 08:46:39 AM  
1 vote:
Downs initially told officers her husband hurt himself. She then said her husband had been causing problems all day by urinating on the floor and lying to the cable company an an effort to obtain service.

Well, if she hadn't cut his throat, the cable company would have. You just don't lie to the cable company. When they find out, they'll come after you. You'll be lucky if they just cut you. Send you down to Argentina to weave coax cable for them in one of their torture factories. Spend all day weaving copper shielding and if you don't turn in 30 perfect yards, no bread or water.

My uncle stole Skinemax from them. They were ticked about that but then he tried to tell them "it was Customer Service's fault" they just lost it. The cable company stands behind their CS people and have the phone records to back it up. A quick check showed that uncle was lying. Didn't see him again for two years. Now, even in his sleep, he acts like he's weaving copper. Wakes up and his fingers are all bloody. Weird.
2014-06-25 08:16:37 AM  
1 vote:

Darth_Lukecash: Methadone Girls: She's only 52? Ouch

There's a rich 52 and there is a poor 52


And then there's That 52.
2014-06-25 07:54:17 AM  
1 vote:
img.fark.net

cf.badassdigest.com
2014-06-25 06:48:47 AM  
1 vote:
Took me a while to place her family line.

gallery.guetech.org

But that's not quite right.  It's like someone squished her head from the sides, elongating it.  It's like someone photoshopped her, replicating about 3" if extra head between her ear and her face.
2014-06-25 06:43:56 AM  
1 vote:
Emaciated, bad skin, stringy hair and hollow eyes. You get a lot of those in health food stores.
2014-06-25 06:42:45 AM  
1 vote:
Don't stick your dick in dead.
2014-06-25 06:40:45 AM  
1 vote:

Lsherm: Old pee story:

Eons ago I agreed to spend a night with my ex-wife in Patpong (Bangkok's sex district) because my she grew up in Malaysia and she wanted me to see what all the hubub was about....



LOL. Ok, it's your story you can tell it however you like.
2014-06-25 05:25:29 AM  
1 vote:
Seriously, look at your GFs Mother! That's what she's gonna look like. Sadly the same thing holds for us guys too. Never thought about that didja?
2014-06-25 05:15:40 AM  
1 vote:
That's Pennsyltucky in 30 years.
2014-06-25 04:51:01 AM  
1 vote:
52 and still hot
2014-06-25 04:33:16 AM  
1 vote:
Is this really a news story,

or is it some sort of viral marketing thing for "Kingpin 2: Electric Bowl-A-Loo"
2014-06-25 04:13:16 AM  
1 vote:
www.reactionface.info
 
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