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(Globe and Mail)   In what could have been the greatest, or most unsettling, movie ever made. David Cronenberg turned down an opportunity to direct one of the Star Wars sequels   (theglobeandmail.com) divider line 31
    More: Strange, David Cronenberg, Star Wars, Film Festivals, Videodrome, Provincetown International Film Festival, Imperial Stormtroopers, Jay Jay, Len Wiseman  
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840 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 24 Jun 2014 at 2:44 PM (42 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



31 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-06-24 01:17:37 PM  
If he had done Jedi, I hope he would've wiped out every Ewok on Endor.
 
2014-06-24 02:20:59 PM  

strangeguitar: If he had done Jedi, I hope he would've wiped out every Ewok on Endor.


The fever-dream sequence after Han Solo main-lined Space heroin alone would have been worth the price of admission
 
2014-06-24 02:46:26 PM  
Chewbacca would have only been able to get aroused by the sound of lightsabers spinning.
 
2014-06-24 02:46:50 PM  
img2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-06-24 02:57:24 PM  

strangeguitar: If he had done Jedi, I hope he would've wiped out every Ewok on Endor.



A massive area rug.
 
2014-06-24 03:00:22 PM  

Jaden Smith First of His Name: Chewbacca would have only been able to get aroused by the sound of lightsabers spinning.


Then would have forced R2 to watch him sodomize C3PO.
 
2014-06-24 03:04:35 PM  
The first two in line to see that version:
img1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-06-24 03:18:26 PM  
Meanwhile, Harrison Ford's broken leg could push back production
 
2014-06-24 03:23:43 PM  

Optimal_Illusion: The first two in line to see that version:
[img1.wikia.nocookie.net image 548x357]


Came here solely to make sure Rick & Morty were accounted for.

/cronenbergs
 
2014-06-24 03:24:15 PM  

texdent: Meanwhile, Harrison Ford's broken leg could push back production


Or force them to do something original.
 
2014-06-24 03:31:29 PM  
Doesn't every Cronenberg film have an exploding torso / chest burst in it?  Like "Scene 44" in A History of Violence?
 
2014-06-24 03:40:43 PM  
Han slashed stem-to-sternum with a creepy gynecological tool first.
 
2014-06-24 03:53:19 PM  

ruta: Han slashed stem-to-sternum with a creepy gynecological tool first.


That would be "tools for mutant Women"

rymimg.com
 
2014-06-24 04:02:45 PM  
Man, that scene where Han cuts open the Tauntaun would have been EPIC...
 
2014-06-24 04:18:37 PM  
He's due for a new one.  Love his work.
 
2014-06-24 04:34:16 PM  
Wasn't this known since, well, a long, long time ago??? Come on, if I knew it, surely it's not obscure on Fark.
 
2014-06-24 04:44:00 PM  
Riann Johnson is writing/directing one, which leaves me conflicted. I'm a big fan of Johnson, including The Brothers Bloom, but I'm sick of Star Wars.
 
2014-06-24 05:04:40 PM  
I believe the Sarlacc would have had a more, um, anatomical appearance.
 
2014-06-24 05:12:29 PM  

Pants full of macaroni!!: Optimal_Illusion: The first two in line to see that version:
[img1.wikia.nocookie.net image 548x357]

Came here solely to make sure Rick & Morty were accounted for.

/cronenbergs


Me too!
 
2014-06-24 05:17:44 PM  
David Lynch did "Dune", also turned down "Jedi", Lucas was frustrated by Irving Kershner making a great movie on "Empire" & wanted somebody he could lean on, hence Richard Marquand
 
2014-06-24 05:35:29 PM  
"In other Star Wars news according to reports this week, Tom Cruise met with Star Wars: Episode VII director J.J. Abrams in London to discuss the possibility of him making a cameo appearance in the new film. "

Whaaa?
 
2014-06-24 05:43:34 PM  

Old Man Winter: "In other Star Wars news according to reports this week, Tom Cruise met with Star Wars: Episode VII director J.J. Abrams in London to discuss the possibility of him making a cameo appearance in the new film. "

Whaaa?


He'll just dash across the screen in the background.
 
2014-06-24 05:49:50 PM  

Old Man Winter: "In other Star Wars news according to reports this week, Tom Cruise met with Star Wars: Episode VII director J.J. Abrams in London to discuss the possibility of him making a cameo appearance in the new film. "

Whaaa?


This is not always a bad thing:

www.tomcruise.com

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-06-24 06:24:16 PM  

LeroyBourne: He's due for a new one.  Love his work.


"A Dangerous Method" sucked. The only thing he's done that's worse is "Spider."

"Eastern Promises," on the other hand, was magnificent. As was "A History of Violence."
 
2014-06-24 06:29:12 PM  

Mad_Radhu: Old Man Winter: "In other Star Wars news according to reports this week, Tom Cruise met with Star Wars: Episode VII director J.J. Abrams in London to discuss the possibility of him making a cameo appearance in the new film. "

Whaaa?

This is not always a bad thing:

[www.tomcruise.com image 640x368]

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 500x313]


Pretty much. Keep tom cruse the hell out a starring roll, but a cameo is fine.
 
2014-06-24 06:31:32 PM  
lol - I just (re-)watched Shivers/They Came from Within last night. Great film, but farking creepy....
 
2014-06-24 08:56:54 PM  
Had it been Return of the Jedi with Cronenberg, the Emperor would've been sending some nasty fleshcrafting magics at Luke instead of lightning.

/Vader without the mask would've scared children for life, too
 
2014-06-24 09:26:57 PM  

Mad_Radhu: Old Man Winter: "In other Star Wars news according to reports this week, Tom Cruise met with Star Wars: Episode VII director J.J. Abrams in London to discuss the possibility of him making a cameo appearance in the new film. "

Whaaa?

This is not always a bad thing:

[www.tomcruise.com image 640x368]

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 500x313]


deborahjones.theworldrace.org
 
2014-06-24 10:39:31 PM  

Crewmannumber6: Riann Johnson is writing/directing one, which leaves me conflicted. I'm a big fan of Johnson, including The Brothers Bloom, but I'm sick of Star Wars.


I'd actually go to see a hardboiled Star Wars sequel complete with appropriate dialog, a la "Brick".
 
2014-06-24 11:58:48 PM  
1000words1000days.com
 
2014-06-25 07:58:46 AM  

theorellior: Crewmannumber6: Riann Johnson is writing/directing one, which leaves me conflicted. I'm a big fan of Johnson, including The Brothers Bloom, but I'm sick of Star Wars.

I'd actually go to see a hardboiled Star Wars sequel complete with appropriate dialog, a la "Brick".


True, but I bet if ten years from now you got every rat in town together and said "Show your hands" if any of them've actually seen The movie, you'd get a crowd of full pockets.
 
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