Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Huffington Post)   Ten tips on becoming a morning person, the greatest type of person there is   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 107
    More: PSA, morning person, smear campaigns  
•       •       •

7565 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jun 2014 at 5:35 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



107 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-06-24 01:28:16 AM  
www.missfitnesslife.com
 
2014-06-24 01:50:05 AM  
Yeah, I'll get right on that.
 
2014-06-24 02:29:56 AM  
The biggest hurdle is just getting out of bed.

What I like to do is get out of bed, splash some cold water on my face to freshen up, then wake everyone up with a big smile and rousing tickle attack. Then I turn on the TV and do some stretches before sitting down to a hearty breakfast.

It helps to fake being happy and energetic. Eventually it becomes habit and not fake anymore.

It's awesome. And you're awesome, if you're awake!
 
2014-06-24 03:35:03 AM  
"People who get up early in the morning cause war, death and famine." - Banksy
 
2014-06-24 04:11:12 AM  
fark subby, fark the author, but especially fark that AverageAmericanGuy.  Tickle attacks are not an acceptable means of waking someone up.  It's been ruled torture by the UN.

fark e'rebody.  It's too goddamn early.
 
2014-06-24 04:12:45 AM  
The TICKLEMONSTER is coming! Coochy coochy coo!
 
2014-06-24 04:50:43 AM  
Not even Hitler was a morning person.

So if you are a morning person, you're worse than him. Think about it. Now hit snooze.
 
2014-06-24 04:57:38 AM  
I don't know why, but I am a morning person.  Always have been.

Currently my alarm is set for 6:30 but I'm always awake before it.  5am is easily doable but I end up going to bed at 10pm which is quite boring.
 
2014-06-24 04:58:41 AM  
I think part of the reason is I never have light-blocking curtans, so when the sun wakes up it's bright as anything.
 
2014-06-24 05:42:08 AM  
http://www.catster.com/files/original.jpg
 
2014-06-24 05:42:47 AM  
So let me get this right.  I work nights at the hospital so I get home at 8am.  I stay up til about 10am.  So that means I am more of a morning person then most people as I get from 1201-1000.  Only 2 hours of morning that I am missing out on.
 
2014-06-24 05:43:27 AM  

lindseyp: I don't know why, but I am a morning person.  Always have been.

Currently my alarm is set for 6:30 but I'm always awake before it.  5am is easily doable but I end up going to bed at 10pm which is quite boring.


I go to bed at 8pm and wake up at 3:58am most mornings, though my alarm is set for 4am.

A morning hour feels like three to me.
 
2014-06-24 05:43:40 AM  

lindseyp: Currently my alarm is set for 6:30 but I'm always awake before it.  5am is easily doable


I hate you. I just wanted you to know that.

lindseyp: I think part of the reason is I never have light-blocking curtans, so when the sun wakes up it's bright as anything.


My bedroom window looks out onto what might be the last remaining video rental store in the world, which has dealt with the internet making its business model obsolete by covering itself in extremely bright neon signs that stay lit 24/7. Blackout curtains are a sad necessity and they mean I'm always in a deep sleep when my alarm sounds, making me miserable for the first couple hours of every day.
 
2014-06-24 05:43:53 AM  
I'm up at 05h00, on the road before anyone else so it is a pleasant 25 minute commute on empty roads rather than 90 minutes stuck in traffic. Quick stop for coffee on the way and at work by 06h00. Back home (again missing the traffic) between 15h15 and 15h30 and half an afternoon still to myself to go shopping, putter around the house or do anything else I damn well please.
 
2014-06-24 05:48:41 AM  

August11: I go to bed at 8pm and wake up at 3:58am most mornings, though my alarm is set for 4am.



What horrible things did you do to get that schedule?
 
2014-06-24 05:51:54 AM  

doglover: August11: I go to bed at 8pm and wake up at 3:58am most mornings, though my alarm is set for 4am.


What horrible things did you do to get that schedule?


Ha! No really it is a chosen schedule--I have always been a morning person.
 
2014-06-24 05:52:09 AM  

Caluth: So let me get this right.  I work nights at the hospital so I get home at 8am.  I stay up til about 10am.  So that means I am more of a morning person then most people as I get from 1201-1000.  Only 2 hours of morning that I am missing out on.


I'm right there with you.
 
2014-06-24 05:55:02 AM  

August11: doglover: August11: I go to bed at 8pm and wake up at 3:58am most mornings, though my alarm is set for 4am.


What horrible things did you do to get that schedule?

Ha! No really it is a chosen schedule--I have always been a morning person.


I guess you must have been really terrible in a previous life. Not like... Genghis Khan terrible, but pretty bad. Bad enough that someone cursed you in this life.
 
2014-06-24 05:58:56 AM  
This is pretty much how I roll:

media1.arabia.msn.com
 
2014-06-24 06:00:34 AM  
Cocaine for breakfast is a pretty good method to kickstart your day.
 
2014-06-24 06:01:37 AM  
All I got from that article is I have no chance in hell of ever sleeping correctly due to rotating shift work. Thanks Obama.

/I'm still a morning person
 
2014-06-24 06:01:54 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: The biggest hurdle is just getting out of bed.

What I like to do is get out of bed, splash some cold water on my face to freshen up, then wake everyone up with a big smile and rousing tickle attack. Then I turn on the TV and do some stretches before sitting down to a hearty breakfast.

It helps to fake being happy and energetic. Eventually it becomes habit and not fake anymore.

It's awesome. And you're awesome, if you're awake!


If I was a member of your household, you would not have survived the first time you tried to wake me up. Also, everyone else would have been woken up by your screams and pleas for mercy.

/not a morning person
//I value my sleep, since I have a hard time getting enough of it
///obligatory third slashie
 
2014-06-24 06:02:01 AM  

doglover: August11: doglover: August11: I go to bed at 8pm and wake up at 3:58am most mornings, though my alarm is set for 4am.


What horrible things did you do to get that schedule?

Ha! No really it is a chosen schedule--I have always been a morning person.

I guess you must have been really terrible in a previous life. Not like... Genghis Khan terrible, but pretty bad. Bad enough that someone cursed you in this life.


Either that or just an absolute lazy fark. Because I'm getting a lot done in this life.

Most people, though, who are against getting up before sunrise have never tried it. It is a different world and mostly distraction free, he said while typing on Fark...
 
2014-06-24 06:07:04 AM  
Shout out to all the morning people out there!  I'm a serious morning person, wake up bright and chipper every morning around 3:50am.

As far as their tips that I don't follow...

#2 - I break this rule with a passion.  Got my laptop, a big screen TV (which we leave on all night every night), my wife's laptop, and the monitor I play Rock Band on, all in my bedroom.

#8 - I don't work out.  I've been more active lately, but most days I'm as sedentary as possible.

#9 - I expose myself more than I expose myself to natural light.  There are times that I get virtually no natural light except in my car, and from my car to my job's front door.  I occasionally garden, but that's rare.

#10 - HA!
 
2014-06-24 06:08:02 AM  

bencoon: Caluth: So let me get this right.  I work nights at the hospital so I get home at 8am.  I stay up til about 10am.  So that means I am more of a morning person then most people as I get from 1201-1000.  Only 2 hours of morning that I am missing out on.

I'm right there with you.


I work from 7p-7a 3 nights a week.  I'm not sure what that makes me but being up before the sun when I'm not required to work is not my particular brand of vodka.
 
2014-06-24 06:09:59 AM  
I agree with all those things in the article except the the workout. You can shove that up your arse. I get the workout at work
 
2014-06-24 06:11:26 AM  
F*ck mornings. I hate them coming and going.
 
2014-06-24 06:13:51 AM  
i218.photobucket.com
 
2014-06-24 06:14:10 AM  
I really don't think you can force yourself to become a morning person.  I've always been one and have seen several people try and they just don't seem to have any energy when they first wake up.
 
2014-06-24 06:14:40 AM  

Bob Down: I agree with all those things in the article except the the workout. You can shove that up your arse. I get the workout at work


Looks like things have worked out OK for you
 
2014-06-24 06:16:41 AM  
"Thank you for telling me something I alread know. You should work for the Huffington Post." -Jack from 30 Rock
 
2014-06-24 06:18:38 AM  
Haven't been able to sleep much at all lately but normally when I'm on I like to wake up before sunrise.
 
2014-06-24 06:22:42 AM  
If the world would just switch the am/pm thing around, I'd be fine.

Have to get up at 0430, but would much, much rather get up at the crack of noon.
 
2014-06-24 06:23:23 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: The biggest hurdle is just getting out of bed.

What I like to do is get out of bed, splash some cold water on my face to freshen up, then wake everyone up with a big smile and rousing tickle attack. Then I turn on the TV and do some stretches before sitting down to a hearty breakfast.

It helps to fake being happy and energetic. Eventually it becomes habit and not fake anymore.

It's awesome. And you're awesome, if you're awake!


Nothing defeats the tickle monster like a hearty morning fart.  Learned that early in life and it became a habit.
 
2014-06-24 06:32:13 AM  
1. Be successful
2. Have something to look forward to
3. Go to bed early
4. Wake up early
Etc...

Do I win?
 
2014-06-24 06:39:33 AM  

HaywoodJablonski: 1. Be successful
2. Have something to look forward to
3. Go to bed early
4. Wake up early
Etc...

Do I win?


Meh. Close enough. Working out in the AM won't help you wake up. However, getting plenty of exercise will help.
 
2014-06-24 06:39:34 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: The biggest hurdle is just getting out of bed.

What I like to do is get out of bed, splash some cold water on my face to freshen up, then wake everyone up with a big smile and rousing tickle attack. Then I turn on the TV and do some stretches before sitting down to a hearty breakfast.

It helps to fake being happy and energetic. Eventually it becomes habit and not fake anymore.

It's awesome. And you're awesome, if you're awake!




I want to strangle you.
/not really
/I hate morning, noon and night
 
2014-06-24 06:40:17 AM  

twat_waffle: AverageAmericanGuy: The biggest hurdle is just getting out of bed.

What I like to do is get out of bed, splash some cold water on my face to freshen up, then wake everyone up with a big smile and rousing tickle attack. Then I turn on the TV and do some stretches before sitting down to a hearty breakfast.

It helps to fake being happy and energetic. Eventually it becomes habit and not fake anymore.

It's awesome. And you're awesome, if you're awake!

If I was a member of your household, you would not have survived the first time you tried to wake me up. Also, everyone else would have been woken up by your screams and pleas for mercy.

/not a morning person
//I value my sleep, since I have a hard time getting enough of it
///obligatory third slashie


You would probably be too groggy and slow to stop the morning person.  There's a reason many armies in the past successfully attacked enemy camps in the early morning.  The defenders were too disoriented and brain-fogged to organize a resistance before it was too late.

As for mornings, I used to stay up until 2 or 3 consistently and hated the mornings.  Now I've come to appreciate them because few people are around.  The peace of an empty world lit by the morning sun beats the peace of getting up at 11.  Rushing through a morning because I tried to squeeze out a few more drops of sleep leaves me irritated and tired, but getting up with plenty of time to eat, read the news and putter around, even if it means getting less than ideal hours of sleep, leaves me feeling better 100% of the time.

I have worked with a lot of people who claim to be ok with little sleep, but who get up 10 minutes before they leave for work.  Their breakfast is coffee and a cigarette or some cheap snack.  They are grouchy and unproductive for  hours before they finally wake up.  I try to tell them that getting up 20 minutes earlier and eating a good breakfast would make them feel way better than those extra minutes of sleep, but they think I'm an idiot.

Getting up after 5 hours of sleep and eating a full, leisurely breakfast while reading will help you more than 5 hours and a large coffee.
 
2014-06-24 06:46:08 AM  
I work early morning shifts.  I'm not a morning person, and this experienced has only reinforced the knowledge that I never will be.  I've adapted enough to be functional, but boy am I in a shiatty mood every morning.
 
2014-06-24 06:55:19 AM  
Do some yoga, they said. Get some sun, they said.
1.bp.blogspot.com

Sees like a good way to star...what....
www.themindbodyfitness.com
I think I'll just have a coffee instead.
 
2014-06-24 06:59:40 AM  
Another article that assumes everyone is the same and that what works for them must work for everybody.  As for the "no screens before bed" one, I fall asleep with the TV on every night, I can't fall asleep without it.
 
2014-06-24 07:02:00 AM  
Their step 7 --getting up at the same time every day-- is difficult, but it's probably the option with the biggest health and productivity payoff for most people.

1. Decide what time you want to wake up every day.
2. Set an alarm for that time.
3. Set a regular bedtime for yourself.
4. If the alarm interrupts your sleep, get up for the day, even if you feel like crap, and subtract 15 minutes from your bedtime.
5. If you consistently wake up more than 30 minutes prior to the alarm, add 15 minutes to your bedtime.
6. If you had to adjust your bedtime, set a reminder for the new bedtime.
7. Actually adhere to the bedtime you set. <-- Extremely difficult
8. GOTO 4

/Haven't actually tried this.
//And ignore all of this if you have kids.
 
2014-06-24 07:02:46 AM  
I don't have children. I'm happily married. We have an incredibly comfortable bed. I'll be in the sack.
 
2014-06-24 07:05:49 AM  
One way to get your partner out of bed.

i.chzbgr.com
 
2014-06-24 07:07:09 AM  
Is the article ten separate listings to do not drink like a horse in summer?
 
2014-06-24 07:08:32 AM  
I have to get up at 0530 every weekday, but I am definitely not a morning person. Just get me my coffee and stay out of my way and nobody will get hurt. Probably. Maybe.
 
2014-06-24 07:11:52 AM  

NJR_ZA: I'm up at 05h00, on the road before anyone else so it is a pleasant 25 minute commute on empty roads rather than 90 minutes stuck in traffic. Quick stop for coffee on the way and at work by 06h00. Back home (again missing the traffic) between 15h15 and 15h30 and half an afternoon still to myself to go shopping, putter around the house or do anything else I damn well please.


same here.   i get to work 4 hours before my boss.  we like each other better this way.
 
2014-06-24 07:13:37 AM  
Ugh...I get up at 4:00am.  Shower, brush my teeth, make coffee, eat breakfast, and I am out the door in about 40 mins.

Out of all of those, eat breakfast is my number one priority.  If I don't have something to eat, that just ruins my day.  I don't care if it a bowl of cereal, some toast with peanut butter and honey on it, or bacon and eggs, I never neglect food in the morning.

Another thing that helped back in the day was getting up and playing some Guitar Hero right away.  Helped work out my mind and get my brain moving.  I can't do that now though, don't want to wake the kids.

I need to start doing pull ups in the morning or something to get the blood flowing.

/bitter cold mornings are the best
//these damn hot and humid summer mornings are the worst.
 
2014-06-24 07:18:29 AM  
I woke up at 0540 for most of my young life. Had insomnia for most of my life (childhood included). Never achieved anything productive before 1500 and actually got almost fired twice for errors made at exactly 0900.

fark MORNINGS. fark THEM IN THE ARSE. WITH A SPLINTERED BROOM. THEY ARE THE SPAWN OF SATAN.

I no longer have insomnia. I no longer have apnea (which it turned out I had, and that got beaten with a nice Darth Vader machine which makes me laugh my arse off every night), I work out semi-regularly, and I still don't get any ideas, write anything resembling the King's English, or have my troubleshooting wits around until after midday. I'll happily be the one relieving your poor tired morning butts at 2000 when you go all foggy and sleepy and cute like babies rubbing their eyes (awww) and go on until you come in all refreshed to find the fort held and the cats herded.

I love night shifts, night driving and night flying, I was proudly born into tribe Nosferatu and a son of darkness shall I remain.
 
2014-06-24 07:20:25 AM  
I have to get up at 2:30 AM every day.

I hate mornings with a passion. Always have. Everything is so ugly, especially the gross-ass orange light that comes with the sunrise.

I just want to sleep.
 
2014-06-24 07:22:28 AM  
If the sun is up, I'm awake. I could go to sleep at 2, and still wake up when the sun goes through the window. People talk about these wonderful things called naps, but I have no idea what they are.
 
2014-06-24 07:25:28 AM  
There are times when I like to sleep in to about 0600, but mostly I am having a cup of coffee a little after 0500.
Unless the alarm is set to a later time, usually around 0700, then I seem to sleep until it starts making noise.
And when I am awoken by the alarm I seem to be tired.
Glad that I don't have to use the alarm since I retired, at least not that much anyway.
 
2014-06-24 07:27:02 AM  
I was also that person in college who took his classes between the hours of 6:30am and Noon, and was done for the rest of the day.

/had to deal with less people that way
 
2014-06-24 07:30:29 AM  
I  wake up every damn morning at 2 am.  Because I have to pee.      EVERY DAMN MORNING!   I don't care if I go to to bed at 8pm or 11pm I wake up at 2.     And then finally dose off at about 3.   Which would be fine if I wasn't in a dead sleep when the alarm goes off at 430.     Damn you bladder!!
 
2014-06-24 07:33:00 AM  
Any tips for making morning people less goddamn smug?
 
2014-06-24 07:33:47 AM  
Sleep, those little slices of death; Oh how I loathe them.
-Poe

Usually up by 3:30. Gotta make the donuts.
 
2014-06-24 07:38:18 AM  

tartcake: I  wake up every damn morning at 2 am.  Because I have to pee.      EVERY DAMN MORNING!   I don't care if I go to to bed at 8pm or 11pm I wake up at 2.     And then finally dose off at about 3.   Which would be fine if I wasn't in a dead sleep when the alarm goes off at 430.     Damn you bladder!!


You might want to get that checked out.  Of course the article ignores people working overnight.  I recently went to a new schedule for a technically new position with the same official title, so I still haven't figured out when to go to sleep or wake up, and I don't care, on the weekends I'm going to be more a less a day person because that's natural.

/ Really hates working nights, but it's full time.
// Also screwed up an opportunity for a $20/hr job.
 
2014-06-24 07:38:39 AM  
For me to become a morning person I had to get into a car accident. After that I had insomnia and when I did sleep I had nightmares for years. Now I get to bed 10-11 and wake up at 4-5 and leave for work at 8. I dont drink coffee but damn some of the people I work with really suck it down.
 
2014-06-24 07:38:40 AM  
I prefer waking up with a rock-hard erection at 530, making use of it for fifteen minutes, then basking in the morning sunrise for fifteen more minutes until the alarm goes off at 6.
 
2014-06-24 07:41:26 AM  

jtown: AverageAmericanGuy: The biggest hurdle is just getting out of bed.

What I like to do is get out of bed, splash some cold water on my face to freshen up, then wake everyone up with a big smile and rousing tickle attack. Then I turn on the TV and do some stretches before sitting down to a hearty breakfast.

It helps to fake being happy and energetic. Eventually it becomes habit and not fake anymore.

It's awesome. And you're awesome, if you're awake!

Nothing defeats the tickle monster like a hearty morning fart.  Learned that early in life and it became a habit.


In my family, a simple fart is not enough. You could let out the most rancid, loudest fart in my mother's kitchen, and my family would see it as a challenge.

No, the best way to defeat the Tickle Monster is to shiat the bed.
 
2014-06-24 07:49:31 AM  
I can remember waking at 4AM, back when I was a little child - 55 some years ago.  I still wake up before 5 every day.  I can stay up till 2 drinking heavily and still wake up at 5.

It used to be OK, I could get more done before 8AM than most people would in a whole day.  Now, I'm (marginally) old and don't have the desire to be productive.

I wish I could sleep, but once the brain goes off, it's all over but the crying - no sleep for me!
 
2014-06-24 07:53:33 AM  
Yes, because history is just overflowing with designers, inventors, artists, writers, theorists, architects, etc who were morning people....

YOU ARE THE PROBLEM, NOT THE SOLUTION! The world is advanced forward by night owls, morning people do the mindless grunt work.
 
2014-06-24 07:54:22 AM  
The moment I see that something eliminates "bad toxins in the body," I stop caring about the point that is being made, even if I know what they're talking about.

/I was turned into a morning person by getting a job that requires I get up at 6:30.
 
2014-06-24 08:03:12 AM  

GenePoolinWV: I can stay up till 2 drinking heavily and still wake up at 5.


Alcohol messes with your sleep cycle. About the worst thing you can do if you have insomnia is to drink. Oh, it'll put you to sleep, but then you'll get up again in 5 hours.
 
2014-06-24 08:04:14 AM  

Destructor: GenePoolinWV: I can stay up till 2 drinking heavily and still wake up at 5.

Alcohol messes with your sleep cycle. About the worst thing you can do if you have insomnia is to drink. Oh, it'll put you to sleep, but then you'll get up again in 5 hours.


And do that for 5 years, and your skin will look like it's aged 15.
 
2014-06-24 08:08:54 AM  
Sure, just go to sleep, it's easy.  The author is brilliant, he/she should give seminars.
 
2014-06-24 08:10:14 AM  

Bungles: And do that for 5 years, and your skin will look like it's aged 15.


Drinking heavily for 5 years, that'll be the least of your problems... :-(
 
2014-06-24 08:11:29 AM  
I'd rather
i.imgur.com
 
2014-06-24 08:12:17 AM  

doglover: August11: I go to bed at 8pm and wake up at 3:58am most mornings, though my alarm is set for 4am.


What horrible things did you do to get that schedule?


Hah, I have coincidentally that exact same sleep schedule. However only because I have a shiatty job where my hours are 6-2:30.

/you get used to it
//getting off that early kicks ass
 
2014-06-24 08:13:49 AM  

August11: Most people, though, who are against getting up before sunrise have never tried it.


Oh, I've tried. I love sunrises. They're the perfect time to go to bed after staying up all night.

Diurnal I ain't.
 
2014-06-24 08:16:12 AM  
Best type my ..SCREW YOU SHUT UP IM TRYING TO SLEEP....damn kids on the lawn ...yawn ...sleepy now.
 
2014-06-24 08:16:55 AM  

Destructor: Bungles: And do that for 5 years, and your skin will look like it's aged 15.

Drinking heavily for 5 years, that'll be the least of your problems... :-(


Depends if you rank "getting laid" over "dying of liver cancer".

I DO!
 
2014-06-24 08:30:58 AM  
I love the early morning for so many reasons...

I have seen things you people would not believe.

Coyotes silently prowling through underbrush. Ground fog dipped in moonlight slowly pouring through dew drenched fields. A world fallen silent, currently free of restlessness and at peace. And then all those moments are slowly lost with the first hint of morning light and the gentle chirping of a solitary bird... joined moments later by a choir of his friends saluting the hint of dawn and the start of a promise; that of a new, fresh, day.

Time to live.
 
2014-06-24 08:33:39 AM  
Why should I become a morning person?
 
2014-06-24 08:35:41 AM  

In the perfect world we would all be morning people.


niketalk.com


That would make for the worst astronomers ever.
 
2014-06-24 08:39:14 AM  
All you morning people go kill yourselves. Right now. I'll wait...

My natural body clock is set to a 25.5 hour day, meaning it's sheer hell maintaining any sort of a regular schedule at any time of the day or night. But I do my best work in the hours before sleep comes.
 
2014-06-24 08:45:09 AM  

Rhino_man: Any tips for making morning people less goddamn smug?


Keep them up 'til 3 AM.
 
2014-06-24 08:47:58 AM  
I work 11a to 7p. Usually in bed around midnight, up at 8. On the rare occasions I work 1st shift (7a to 3p) I have no problem getting up early, but am wiped out when I get home at 4, mainly because I find it impossible to go to bed at 9pm in order to get 8 hours of sleep. I just crash for a couple hours in the late afternoon.
 
2014-06-24 08:50:46 AM  

postnobills: All you morning people go kill yourselves. Right now. I'll wait...


On it. I figure another 10-50 years should do it.

Bungles: Depends if you rank "getting laid" over "dying of liver cancer".

I DO!


Hmm. I see. Well, you have made a compelling argument.

Sir, I salute you. Carry on.
 
2014-06-24 09:10:12 AM  
I don't believe in this thing called "morning person".  I don't think there really is such a thing.  This, even though I happen to be what most people would call a "morning person"

Now don't go thinking I'm being silly.

I used to be a night person.  Like to the point where I would be awake until 4:00AM for no other reason than I didn't feel like sleeping.  I would either be playing a game or working on a project (I can't work when there are distractions).

But somewhere along the line, it switched over to where I get up at like 5:30AM every day now.  So now I do all my project work then (when there are no distractions).  This happens every day.  I haven't used an alarm clock in years.

Someday things may switch back the other way, when I stay up late again.  But for now, I'm an early riser, and have no problem with it.  I wake up, I get some coffee, I get to work...
 
2014-06-24 09:12:59 AM  

Destructor: postnobills: All you morning people go kill yourselves. Right now. I'll wait...

On it. I figure another 10-50 years should do it.

Bungles: Depends if you rank "getting laid" over "dying of liver cancer".

I DO!

Hmm. I see. Well, you have made a compelling argument.

Sir, I salute you. Carry on.


It's not totally outrageous, if you think about it.

Look at cigarette warning advertising. The ads for easily relatable  "increases wrinkles" and "smells" have been shown to have a much higher attitude adjustment impact than the ones that talk about distant abstract things like "lung cancer" and "emphysema".

We are creatures of vanity.
 
2014-06-24 09:21:04 AM  

Bungles: It's not totally outrageous, if you think about it


No, really, I'm serious. You're right. :-)

Bungles: We are creatures of vanity.


There is no denying it. However, it is worth trying to overcome it.
 
2014-06-24 09:24:34 AM  

CowardlyLion: Rhino_man: Any tips for making morning people less goddamn smug?

Keep them up 'til 3 AM.


Naw. 2100 is enough. They really get all pouty and moody and really act like toddlers who haven't had their bath and evening bottle. I actually find it cute, especially when it's one of those "I must be cold and distant" type persons... I LMFAO and either excuse myself (if at a social function) or send 'em home (if at work) so they can put on their jammies and go to bed. The smug act is really a 3-year-old dressing up in grown-up clothes and wanting to act all serious ^_^
 
2014-06-24 09:30:53 AM  
I have non-24-hour-sleep-wake disorder, so I am the alpha and omega of night and morning people.
 
2014-06-24 09:43:18 AM  

doglover: August11: I go to bed at 8pm and wake up at 3:58am most mornings, though my alarm is set for 4am.


What horrible things did you do to get that schedule?


it's a great schedule. I usually go to bed between 8 and 10 and get up between 4-4:30. I can watch anything I want on TV, drink as much coffee (and get as much bathroom time) as I want, make myself a nice breakfast, or go for a walk for exercise with absolutely no one bothering me. I farking love it.
 
2014-06-24 09:49:47 AM  

8tReAsUrEz: Naw. 2100 is enough. They really get all pouty and moody and really act like toddlers who haven't had their bath and evening bottle. I actually find it cute, especially when it's one of those "I must be cold and distant" type persons... I LMFAO and either excuse myself (if at a social function) or send 'em home (if at work) so they can put on their jammies and go to bed. The smug act is really a 3-year-old dressing up in grown-up clothes and wanting to act all serious ^_^


Yeah...it's their smug act...lmao
 
2014-06-24 09:52:06 AM  

Beerguy:


That bear is enjoying its coke.
 
2014-06-24 09:57:39 AM  
Get that sleep cycle app.  I use it. Pretty good.  Wakes me up at some point other than deep REM.  Makes me less stabby in the morning.
 
2014-06-24 10:02:14 AM  
Most people I know who describe themselves as "morning types" are annoying as heck.
 
2014-06-24 10:02:42 AM  

Gunther: lindseyp: Currently my alarm is set for 6:30 but I'm always awake before it.  5am is easily doable

I hate you. I just wanted you to know that.

lindseyp: I think part of the reason is I never have light-blocking curtans, so when the sun wakes up it's bright as anything.

My bedroom window looks out onto what might be the last remaining video rental store in the world, which has dealt with the internet making its business model obsolete by covering itself in extremely bright neon signs that stay lit 24/7. Blackout curtains are a sad necessity and they mean I'm always in a deep sleep when my alarm sounds, making me miserable for the first couple hours of every day.


My bedside lamp is on a timer; it comes on about 4:45, and then the clock radio comes on at 5:00 (and I get up at 5:10, so I can leave at 6:05 to catch the bus). If it's dark when I wake up...see ya, I am going back to sleep.

I am not a morning person but have learned to fake it.
 
2014-06-24 10:05:48 AM  
I am not a morning person and never have been, but in February I started a new job. Our days start at 6:30am, which means my alarm goes off at 5:30.

Strangely, I find that if I'm not waking up naturally anyway, there isn't a huge difference between 5:30 and 7.

It helps that I don't need to be fully awake or engaged to do my job.
 
2014-06-24 10:07:44 AM  

47 is the new 42: You might want to get that checked out.  Of course the article ignores people working overnight.  I recently went to a new schedule for a technically new position with the same official title, so I still haven't figured out when to go to sleep or wake up, and I don't care, on the weekends I'm going to be more a less a day person because that's natural.

/ Really hates working nights, but it's full time.
// Also screwed up an opportunity for a $20/hr job.



I know why (Interstitial Cystitis)    but it doesn't make it any less annoying.
 
2014-06-24 10:13:07 AM  

Nogale: Most people I know who describe themselves as "morning types" are annoying as heck.


Hey, I am not. I'm quiet. I'm just AWAKE.

Woke up this morning at 5:30, after going to sleep at 12. Ugh. Don't have a job either. Damn these long days. My body can tell.
 
2014-06-24 10:41:37 AM  

8tReAsUrEz: I woke up at 0540 for most of my young life. Had insomnia for most of my life (childhood included). Never achieved anything productive before 1500 and actually got almost fired twice for errors made at exactly 0900.

fark MORNINGS. fark THEM IN THE ARSE. WITH A SPLINTERED BROOM. THEY ARE THE SPAWN OF SATAN.

I no longer have insomnia. I no longer have apnea (which it turned out I had, and that got beaten with a nice Darth Vader machine which makes me laugh my arse off every night), I work out semi-regularly, and I still don't get any ideas, write anything resembling the King's English, or have my troubleshooting wits around until after midday. I'll happily be the one relieving your poor tired morning butts at 2000 when you go all foggy and sleepy and cute like babies rubbing their eyes (awww) and go on until you come in all refreshed to find the fort held and the cats herded.

I love night shifts, night driving and night flying, I was proudly born into tribe Nosferatu and a son of darkness shall I remain.


I wake up at noon on free sleep days/weeks.  The best jobs I've ever had were swing/night shift.  I spent 2 years as a forklift operator, took 1 sick day the entire time.  Spent 4 years as a bouncer/bartender/manager, not 1 sick day.

I've worked 15 years as a software developer in an office.  I run out of sick days every year, most of them taken half day at a time to recover from lack of sleep.  Sleeping isn't an issue.  Falling asleep is.  It's not unusal for me to go to bed and lie awake for 5+ hrs trying to sleep.  I've been to several somnologists and they've all diagnosed me with the same thing: inorganic circadian rhythm.  My body cycle isn't in synch with the sun and isn't on a 24hr loop.  It's like an irregular menstrual cycle.  1 day it can be 24hrs, the next it will be 33hrs, then 40hrs, then 9hrs, etc...  Working nightshift helps because without the sun, the body is less able to tell what portion of the cycle it should be in.

/Also have hypothyroidosis/Hashimoto's (broken body clock is a common side effect)
 
2014-06-24 10:53:55 AM  
Conspicuously absent from this list is ditch the caffeine.

I used to be a "night person" when I was addicted to caffeine.  My alarm would go off, I'd be tired and groggy, and I'd need that jolt of caffeine to fully wake up.

I got tired of living like that, so I stopped using caffeine.  Now, I am a "morning person".  I no longer need an alarm clock, and when I wake up, I'm refreshed and wide awake right away.  I do try to abide by some of TFA's other recommendations, like going to bed when one is tired, and trying to keep a more regular bedtime, even on weekends.
 
2014-06-24 11:13:38 AM  

Beerguy: [www.missfitnesslife.com image 625x414]


This pic accurately sums me up in all my interactions before 10am.

A friend of mine once rang my doorbell at 4am. I answered the door with my eyes still screwed shut, and wielding a baseball bat.

/The baseball bat had nothing to do with the neighborhood. I just don't like being woken up....
 
2014-06-24 11:16:23 AM  
I used to be a Technical Director for a local morning news show.  My shift was 1:30am - 10:30am... That's right... I was AT work at 1:30am.

God I don't miss that shift.
 
2014-06-24 11:54:45 AM  
I prefer to stay up until 3~4 in the morning and sleep until noon, but my job does not allow for that.
 
2014-06-24 12:04:50 PM  

Munchkin City Coroner: [i218.photobucket.com image 522x392]


That made me laugh out loud.
 
2014-06-24 12:10:01 PM  
Most morning people are creatures of habit, so they're remarkably easy to assassinate.
 
2014-06-24 12:36:45 PM  
I used to work from 10pm-6am. The night shift never bothered me, but the thing I liked most about it was knowing that as I was drifting off to sleep in the morning all the other slovenly heathens were having to drag their sorry arses out of bed. There was no chance I'd over sleep and be late for work, so I had no need for an alarm clock.

Now I'm parked in a cube farm from 7:30-4:30pm, wake to an alarm at 5am every morning, and am perpetually tired most the time in spite of an hour workout every morning. I'm not built for this crap.
 
2014-06-24 01:24:12 PM  
If you've been getting up at 5AM for 40yrs to go to Work. Well your Body Clock is Set. Just Try to change it.
 
2014-06-24 01:50:54 PM  
Not a morning person. No particular interest in being one. If you're one, fine.

The thing I've noticed about "morning people" is they usually check out by 10 pm. At the latest. Usually by 9 pm, they're biatching about it being "late." Which always sounds kinda ridiculous to me. But whatever. Go ahead and go to bed, grampa.

Just shut the fark about it when I sleep late (which I don't get to do most of the week, so I do it when I can, get over it).
 
2014-06-24 01:55:48 PM  
I became a morning person due to my abiding love of procrastination.  The earlier I get up the longer I have to procrastinate.
 
2014-06-24 03:35:55 PM  
I should point out that my natural pattern, all things being equal, is to go to sleep between 11 and midnight and wake up at around 7:30 (my apartment is flooded with morning light.) In such circumstances I'm perfectly functional and pleasant as soon as I get up. Never perky, though.
 
2014-06-25 05:15:36 AM  
 

Rhino_man: Any tips for making morning people less goddamn smug?


Boom Headshot!
 
2014-06-25 12:18:58 PM  

Smelly Pirate Hooker: Not a morning person. No particular interest in being one. If you're one, fine.

The thing I've noticed about "morning people" is they usually check out by 10 pm. At the latest. Usually by 9 pm, they're biatching about it being "late." Which always sounds kinda ridiculous to me. But whatever. Go ahead and go to bed, grampa.

Just shut the fark about it when I sleep late (which I don't get to do most of the week, so I do it when I can, get over it).


If you don't want people biatching about you sleeping in, don't biatch about them going to bed early, dumbass.
 
Displayed 107 of 107 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report