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(Page Six)   Jason Biggs is one lucky man: Two girls at once for a birthday present. Damn, that's a good wife   (pagesix.com) divider line 91
    More: Spiffy, Biggs, Candace Cameron Bure  
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12187 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 20 Jun 2014 at 1:07 PM (17 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-06-20 10:54:16 AM  
so like Orange is the New Black, except without the incarceration?
 
2014-06-20 10:58:26 AM  
Hired a hooker?

What kind of rich hollywood celebrity needs to hire a hooker when there are many nubile youngins looking for their first role?
 
2014-06-20 11:11:49 AM  

cman: Hired a hooker?

What kind of rich hollywood celebrity needs to hire a hooker when there are many nubile youngins looking for their first role?


Because you pay hookers not for sex, but to go away after.
 
2014-06-20 11:12:11 AM  
cdn.nybodyart.com

Best. Wife. Ever.
 
2014-06-20 11:24:16 AM  
My wife found the whole thing to be quite hysterical even while it was happening. She was actually on the bed, watching, eating a bag of chips, laughing, so as you can imagine, I wasn't really performing to the best of my abilities

This makes me feel morning-after remorse for the whole incident and I wasn't even there.
 
2014-06-20 12:21:18 PM  
In unrelated news, he has a book coming out.
 
2014-06-20 12:48:13 PM  
From what I've heard (really), Mr. Biggs' experience of a threesome is pretty typical:  these things very rarely work out in real life the way they do in porn.

Then again (found in the Google Groups archive, so take it with lots of salt):

According to the book "You'll Never Make Love In This Town Again", Former
"Wings" star Crystal Bernard once paid for a night of sex with a female
prostitute. According to the book, Bernard and her boyfriend were going to have
a threesome with the prostitute but Bernard kicked her boyfriend out of the
scenario.


Sounds like he got off pretty easy.
 
2014-06-20 12:50:11 PM  
The rumor is that he had to be treated for mild burns after because the apple pie was still a bit too fresh from the oven
 
2014-06-20 12:51:37 PM  
Maybe they should have tried a threesome with an apple pie.
 
2014-06-20 12:54:05 PM  

SmackLT: The rumor is that he had to be treated for mild burns after because the apple pie was still a bit too fresh from the oven


/shakes tiny fist
 
2014-06-20 01:00:06 PM  

Atomic Spunk: Maybe they should have tried a threesome with an apple pie.


global3.memecdn.com
 
2014-06-20 01:11:21 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: From what I've heard (really), Mr. Biggs' experience of a threesome is pretty typical:  these things very rarely work out in real life the way they do in porn.

Then again (found in the Google Groups archive, so take it with lots of salt):

According to the book "You'll Never Make Love In This Town Again", Former
"Wings" star Crystal Bernard once paid for a night of sex with a female
prostitute. According to the book, Bernard and her boyfriend were going to have
a threesome with the prostitute but Bernard kicked her boyfriend out of the
scenario.

Sounds like he got off pretty easy.



In my mind the prostitute is a redhead.

i522.photobucket.com
 
2014-06-20 01:12:40 PM  

Sybarite: DjangoStonereaver: From what I've heard (really), Mr. Biggs' experience of a threesome is pretty typical:  these things very rarely work out in real life the way they do in porn.

Then again (found in the Google Groups archive, so take it with lots of salt):

According to the book "You'll Never Make Love In This Town Again", Former
"Wings" star Crystal Bernard once paid for a night of sex with a female
prostitute. According to the book, Bernard and her boyfriend were going to have
a threesome with the prostitute but Bernard kicked her boyfriend out of the
scenario.

Sounds like he got off pretty easy.


In my mind the prostitute is a redhead.

[i522.photobucket.com image 300x404]


Glad I wasn't the only one who thought of that.
 
2014-06-20 01:23:21 PM  
Although some thought the tale funny and an interesting way to spice up their marriage, guest co-host Candace Cameron Bure on Wednesday didn't think it was appropriate.

It's one thing to hear someone describe their own sexcapades and say "yeah, I'm not into that" but to outright decide what a party of consenting adults do in a bedroom as "not appropriate"? Go fark yourself.
 
2014-06-20 01:24:14 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-06-20 01:24:26 PM  

Atomic Spunk: Maybe they should have tried a threesome with an apple pie.


ts3.mm.bing.net
 
2014-06-20 01:24:56 PM  
She asked me what I wished for on my wishlist
Have you ever asked your biatch for other biatches?
-Kanye west
 
2014-06-20 01:26:16 PM  
What BS.
 
2014-06-20 01:27:46 PM  
media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com
 
2014-06-20 01:33:22 PM  
I guess they never saw Chasing Amy.
 
2014-06-20 01:34:43 PM  

Killer Cars: Although some thought the tale funny and an interesting way to spice up their marriage, guest co-host Candace Cameron Bure on Wednesday didn't think it was appropriate.

It's one thing to hear someone describe their own sexcapades and say "yeah, I'm not into that" but to outright decide what a party of consenting adults do in a bedroom as "not appropriate"? Go fark yourself.


Let's not forget the professional douchebag her brother is.
 
2014-06-20 01:36:15 PM  

Killer Cars: Although some thought the tale funny and an interesting way to spice up their marriage, guest co-host Candace Cameron Bure on Wednesday didn't think it was appropriate.

It's one thing to hear someone describe their own sexcapades and say "yeah, I'm not into that" but to outright decide what a party of consenting adults do in a bedroom as "not appropriate"? Go fark yourself.


Especially since she thinks all wives should be totally submissive to their men in bed, like a good Christian woman.
 
2014-06-20 01:37:01 PM  
She hired a hooker, then sat on the bed, ate potato chips, watched and laughed in his face at his inability to fire up the engines...

"Whatsammater, stud? This IS what you wanted isn't it? Awww.. it's a little bookworm... Even the pro can't wake it up. Come on, lady - I'm paying 300 bucks for your time: if you can't suck it to life, we have a defibrillator in the kitchen you can use..."

.. I dunno - doesn't sound a good wife to me..
 
2014-06-20 01:37:07 PM  
i worked with a guy who had his relationship break up over this sort of thing.  his girlfriend thought it would be a fun way to spice up their love life to have a threesome with one of her coworkers.  when it was all over, they had a very bad breakup and the coworker quit her job and cut off contact with them.  the guy told me that having that threesome was one of the biggest mistakes he ever made, and it wasn't even his idea.
 
2014-06-20 01:38:11 PM  

TomServo24: Killer Cars: Although some thought the tale funny and an interesting way to spice up their marriage, guest co-host Candace Cameron Bure on Wednesday didn't think it was appropriate.

It's one thing to hear someone describe their own sexcapades and say "yeah, I'm not into that" but to outright decide what a party of consenting adults do in a bedroom as "not appropriate"? Go fark yourself.

Especially since she thinks all wives should be totally submissive to their men in bed, like a good Christian woman.


I'm atheist, and I subscribe to that philosophy as well.
 
2014-06-20 01:38:28 PM  

Sybarite: DjangoStonereaver: From what I've heard (really), Mr. Biggs' experience of a threesome is pretty typical:  these things very rarely work out in real life the way they do in porn.

Then again (found in the Google Groups archive, so take it with lots of salt):

According to the book "You'll Never Make Love In This Town Again", Former
"Wings" star Crystal Bernard once paid for a night of sex with a female
prostitute. According to the book, Bernard and her boyfriend were going to have
a threesome with the prostitute but Bernard kicked her boyfriend out of the
scenario.

Sounds like he got off pretty easy.


In my mind the prostitute is a redhead.

[i522.photobucket.com image 300x404]


Both Amy Yasbeck and Crystal Bernard are criminially unremembered these days:

withfriendship.com
 
2014-06-20 01:41:48 PM  
I think every time I've heard of Jason Biggs in the last ten years has been about this same damned story.
 
2014-06-20 01:42:28 PM  
Did he get it out of his pants before blowing his wad?
 
2014-06-20 01:43:30 PM  
Threesomes only work if everyone involved is grown up enough to not only handle the "during," but the "after" as well.

/retired swinger
 
2014-06-20 01:44:12 PM  
Maybe she should have brought in a BBC and let him watch while eating Doritos....
 
2014-06-20 01:44:12 PM  
Another entry in the "over rated" list.

Good to know.
 
2014-06-20 01:44:20 PM  
It was Jason Biggs, so it was probably incredibly awkward and ended with him going off without ever touching the woman.

2.bp.blogspot.com

/There to console him
 
2014-06-20 01:50:38 PM  
"I didn't have a good time in the end," said Biggs

I think his wife may have hired the wrong prostitute...
 
2014-06-20 01:53:37 PM  
The interview with Howard Stern was much more detailed and better......
 
2014-06-20 01:53:46 PM  
The first rule of Awkward Threesome Club is don't talk about it. Morons!

In other news, threesomes aren't as sexy as imagined. Keeping two women who aren't really lesbians and aren't acting in a continued state of arousal is more work than you would expect. It is worth it, but would probably not be something to do often.
 
2014-06-20 02:03:40 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: From what I've heard (really), Mr. Biggs' experience of a threesome is pretty typical:  these things very rarely work out in real life the way they do in porn.


Mine was pretty good, but I think it helped that the third party was a girl both my wife and I were good friends with. It was just a bunch of sharing, nobody really got excluded for long, and so you could participate, watch for a while, and jump right back in again.
 
2014-06-20 02:06:23 PM  
The future Mrs. Polish is quite willing to do some fun things, notably in the dress-up category, but she's pretty much outlined that she's not into sharing me with anyone.  She has an appreciation for other women -- she's begging me to take her to see the Dita Von Teese show in Chicago in a few weeks, and I will hardly complain about going to see Von Teese strip naked repeatedly -- but she isn't into them "that way" and has a jealousy streak that would make such a FFM adventure uncomfortable for her.

She also said that I can't enter through the exit, if you know what I mean, so it looks like there are certain experiences I won't get to have in my life.

/Still a keeper
 
2014-06-20 02:07:43 PM  
Who gives a sh*t what Kirk Cameron's sister thinks?
 
2014-06-20 02:08:59 PM  

enderthexenocide: i worked with a guy who had his relationship break up over this sort of thing.  his girlfriend thought it would be a fun way to spice up their love life to have a threesome with one of her coworkers.  when it was all over, they had a very bad breakup and the coworker quit her job and cut off contact with them.  the guy told me that having that threesome was one of the biggest mistakes he ever made, and it wasn't even his idea.


That's why you hire a hooker.  After the deed is done they leave and you never have to see them again, unless YOU want too.
 
2014-06-20 02:12:06 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: From what I've heard (really), Mr. Biggs' experience of a threesome is pretty typical:  these things very rarely work out in real life the way they do in porn.

Then again (found in the Google Groups archive, so take it with lots of salt):

According to the book "You'll Never Make Love In This Town Again", Former
"Wings" star Crystal Bernard once paid for a night of sex with a female
prostitute. According to the book, Bernard and her boyfriend were going to have
a threesome with the prostitute but Bernard kicked her boyfriend out of the
scenario.



Sounds like he got off pretty easy.



www.crystal-bernard.info

I can fap to this.
 
2014-06-20 02:13:44 PM  
Keeping a brave face
In circumstances
Is impossible
Cannot describe
So many decisions
It's impossible
To know which is
The proper order,
The best position,
To be in and
Take advantage
Or so it seems,
The way it goes
 
2014-06-20 02:14:51 PM  
www.hotflick.net


Dont you recognize me...I'm the pie farker
 
2014-06-20 02:21:38 PM  

Crotchrocket Slim: Killer Cars: Although some thought the tale funny and an interesting way to spice up their marriage, guest co-host Candace Cameron Bure on Wednesday didn't think it was appropriate.

It's one thing to hear someone describe their own sexcapades and say "yeah, I'm not into that" but to outright decide what a party of consenting adults do in a bedroom as "not appropriate"? Go fark yourself.

Let's not forget the professional douchebag her brother is.


Candace is apparently just as kooky as her brother is with all the religious stuff. I guess he brainwashed her back when she was just a horrible actress on a second rate 80's sitcom.

Heard Jason Biggs and his wife this week on Howard Stern. It was actually a pretty funny and lengthy story. The part about the wife being alone in the room with the "Filipina garden gnome" prostitute and having awkward conversation while he went down to get cash from the ATM was priceless.
 
2014-06-20 02:26:26 PM  

Killer Cars: Although some thought the tale funny and an interesting way to spice up their marriage, guest co-host Candace Cameron Bure on Wednesday didn't think it was appropriate.

It's one thing to hear someone describe their own sexcapades and say "yeah, I'm not into that" but to outright decide what a party of consenting adults do in a bedroom as "not appropriate"? Go fark yourself.


THIS

/as long as Mrmafiageek1980 told me first before he did it, I wouldn't care. Hey, if it makes him happy, then I'm happy, even if it's not my thing.
 
2014-06-20 02:27:48 PM  

perigee: She hired a hooker, then sat on the bed, ate potato chips, watched and laughed in his face at his inability to fire up the engines...

"Whatsammater, stud? This IS what you wanted isn't it? Awww.. it's a little bookworm... Even the pro can't wake it up. Come on, lady - I'm paying 300 bucks for your time: if you can't suck it to life, we have a defibrillator in the kitchen you can use..."

.. I dunno - doesn't sound a good wife to me..


Sounds like they're into cockolding.

Also, does this count as a threesome?
/Dating bisexual girls is fun.
 
2014-06-20 02:31:48 PM  

perigee: She hired a hooker, then sat on the bed, ate potato chips, watched and laughed in his face at his inability to fire up the engines...

"Whatsammater, stud? This IS what you wanted isn't it? Awww.. it's a little bookworm... Even the pro can't wake it up. Come on, lady - I'm paying 300 bucks for your time: if you can't suck it to life, we have a defibrillator in the kitchen you can use..."


/|\ This... had a 2 pro party in Praque; and performance anxiety was my nemesis!  Oh, my little Mr. Happy let me down so badly. Ouch, went home with my head so low... ain't the same as fapping to those hot videos!

Well, I'm stupid enough to still want to do it again... careful what you wish for; you just might get it; and reality is such a hugely different beast than fantasy!

/never was able to pee in the cup when the medics were watching you for random piss test in the Army.
 
2014-06-20 02:33:30 PM  

Bane of Broone: perigee: She hired a hooker, then sat on the bed, ate potato chips, watched and laughed in his face at his inability to fire up the engines...

"Whatsammater, stud? This IS what you wanted isn't it? Awww.. it's a little bookworm... Even the pro can't wake it up. Come on, lady - I'm paying 300 bucks for your time: if you can't suck it to life, we have a defibrillator in the kitchen you can use..."

.. I dunno - doesn't sound a good wife to me..

Sounds like they're into cockolding cuckolding.

Also, does this count as a threesome?
/Dating bisexual girls is fun.


Damnit, Freud.
FTFM
 
2014-06-20 02:36:31 PM  

Black_Lazerus: She asked me what I wished for on my wishlist
Have you ever asked your biatch for other biatches?
-Kanye west -RonPaul

 
2014-06-20 02:38:25 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: According to the book "You'll Never Make Love In This Town Again", Former
"Wings" star Crystal Bernard once paid for a night of sex with a female
prostitute. According to the book, Bernard and her boyfriend were going to have
a threesome with the prostitute but Bernard kicked her boyfriend out of the
scenario.


Wait! Crystal ("Fundamentalist Christian"/"Bush 41 Booster"/"Lady Family Values"/"latter-day Christian (country) music singer-songwriter") Bernard is into kinky non-heteronormative sex?

Well...roll me in honey + throw me to the lesbians!

As a (nearly-)lifelong  horror movie aficionado, I'll always remember her from her lead role in The Slumber Party Massacre Part II.

/where I first met made her existence's acquaintance.
 
2014-06-20 02:42:45 PM  
My girlfriend wants a threesome with another woman.  I just hope that my wife agrees.
 
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