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(Daily Mail)   The seedy underbelly of Florida's retirement communities: "Every night is Saturday night in The Villages. And who's going to get pregnant?"   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 45
    More: Florida  
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10241 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jun 2014 at 2:08 PM (26 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-06-19 02:15:53 PM  
5 votes:
jay.mobile9.com
2014-06-19 02:14:15 PM  
5 votes:
The women are easy to get into bed. By 8 p.m.
2014-06-19 02:33:31 PM  
4 votes:
www.tvequals.com
2014-06-19 02:22:09 PM  
3 votes:
i.imgur.com
2014-06-19 02:20:22 PM  
3 votes:
51...I should go down there on a "preview tour" and see how much cash I can rake in.....because Horny and with a bank full of disposable retirement income is definitely the way to go through your golden years Grandma

/I bet I could *WRECK* that place.
2014-06-19 01:14:36 PM  
3 votes:
evergreenterrace.com.au

Slippin me your keys after shuffleboard? Oh you better believe that's a paddlin'.
2014-06-19 12:02:50 PM  
3 votes:

FourDirections: The mere thought of wrinkly people banging each other gives me the creeps. I bet it sounds like someone rubbing sandpaper back and forth on a sidewalk.

Ugh, I just threw up into my mouth a little.


So you're going to take a vow of celibacy when you receive your AARP card in the mail?
2014-06-19 11:52:29 AM  
3 votes:
I already saw this on "Bob's Burgers".
2014-06-19 02:48:45 PM  
2 votes:
ChipNASA: Brave M(G)ILF Hunter. God Bless you, Sir.

OH SO GROSS AND SHARP KNEES!!!!!!

images.perfectmatch.com
www.usnews.com

images.perfectmatch.com
pmi1.peoplemedia.com


Where do I check the box on the dating site for women with Parkinson's cause.....HAND JOBS
2014-06-19 02:21:20 PM  
2 votes:
I remember an incident vividly; While working at a nursing home, there was this woman who came in demanding, loudly, that the staff put an end to her mothers night time recreational activities. The staff just sat there straight faced and told the lady "Your mother is her own person, and if she wants to have sex with 5 or 6 different patients in a week, it is her own business, and we are not going to stop it." I could not tell if the woman was red from embarrassment, or red from anger, but it was hilarious.

Bonus, this all started because her daughter, (who only visits before work for a dozen minutes or so), had caught her mother mid-quoits. again...
2014-06-20 12:22:16 AM  
1 votes:

gadian: Ah yes, not worrying about pregnancy means they're less likely to use condoms which means an uptick of AIDS and Hepatitis in retirement communities.


"Oh no! You mean I have to die of AIDS in 15 years instead of dying of Alzheimers in 17 years? Whatever will I do?!"


MemeSlave: Nix Nightbird: If someone had told me, when I was in my highly active 20s, that sex would be even better and quite frequent in my 40s I would have laughed and doubted it, because I thought hitting 30 meant the end of life as I knew it.

You sound unmarried.


I was married for almost 20 years, then divorced after having NO sex whatsoever for the last four years of the marriage. After the divorce, I reconnected with someone I thought I'd lost decades earlier and I put a ring on her finger soon after that.

So it comes down to being with the right person. If you're with the right person, it doesn't get stale.

/and if you shower regularly, it doesn't get crusty.
2014-06-19 06:33:20 PM  
1 votes:
images4.static-bluray.com

images.amcnetworks.com
2014-06-19 05:38:28 PM  
1 votes:

FourDirections: The mere thought of wrinkly people banging each other gives me the creeps. I bet it sounds like someone rubbing sandpaper back and forth on a sidewalk.

Ugh, I just threw up into my mouth a little.


It probably sounds more like stirring a bowl of mac'n'cheese.
2014-06-19 05:23:13 PM  
1 votes:
img.fark.net
best part is they die off, so they don't get attached
2014-06-19 03:59:09 PM  
1 votes:

rickythepenguin: LeroyBourne: it's entirely plausible she's dead now giving out handkys in the sky.


Jacking off Jesus as we speak


I lol'd.  I'll save you seat next to me on the bus to hell, I'll even give you the window seat.
2014-06-19 03:53:48 PM  
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
2014-06-19 03:25:34 PM  
1 votes:

LeroyBourne: it's entirely plausible she's dead now giving out handkys in the sky.



Jacking off Jesus as we speak
2014-06-19 03:21:31 PM  
1 votes:

Old Man Winter: I applaud them.


Winter is coming
2014-06-19 03:18:56 PM  
1 votes:

LeroyBourne: My buddy worked at an old persons home and yeah, that shiat goes on.  He told me there's this old lady that broke her hip, so she was wheelchair bound, but was still all about the cack.  They'd catch her giving out handkys in the dinning room, in the day room, in the tv room.  Now normally I wouldn't give a shiat, but c'mon when families are visiting with kids around.  When telling the story in person I try and give my best zombie moan as to what the men sound like during their experience.


Did your " buddy " get a handy or is this all second hand information ?
2014-06-19 03:12:12 PM  
1 votes:

Dr Dreidel: Cerebral Knievel: Cdr.Murdock: A 49 year old man can be classified as a "boytoy"?

/not as old as I thought.....

Hell, I just turned 40, what would that make me?

Statutory.


I was kinda hoping for that "take a seat over there" guy to show up
2014-06-19 03:01:40 PM  
1 votes:
2014-06-19 03:00:19 PM  
1 votes:
cdn.gifbay.com
2014-06-19 02:58:08 PM  
1 votes:
When granny pops out her dentures, that's the cue...
2014-06-19 02:53:00 PM  
1 votes:

Cerebral Knievel: Cdr.Murdock: A 49 year old man can be classified as a "boytoy"?

/not as old as I thought.....

Hell, I just turned 40, what would that make me?


Statutory.
2014-06-19 02:51:43 PM  
1 votes:
i1.ytimg.com

Denzel approves!
2014-06-19 02:44:01 PM  
1 votes:
What's four-legged, then two-legged, then three-legged, then sixteen-legged?
2014-06-19 02:43:37 PM  
1 votes:
Give subby a few more years and he will be using the Hero tag and buying a house there.
2014-06-19 02:41:35 PM  
1 votes:
And who's going to get pregnant?


urbsocietymagazine.com
2014-06-19 02:41:23 PM  
1 votes:
My buddy worked at an old persons home and yeah, that shiat goes on.  He told me there's this old lady that broke her hip, so she was wheelchair bound, but was still all about the cack.  They'd catch her giving out handkys in the dinning room, in the day room, in the tv room.  Now normally I wouldn't give a shiat, but c'mon when families are visiting with kids around.  When telling the story in person I try and give my best zombie moan as to what the men sound like during their experience.
2014-06-19 02:36:33 PM  
1 votes:
You know what, I need to get out of debt.  I'll just head down there, Fred Garvin some older gals, and come back and pay everything off.

/Including therapy.
//You know, or I could just daydream a little more.  Wha' evah.
2014-06-19 02:29:50 PM  
1 votes:

Day_Old_Dutchie: Not only Viagra, there's probably a thriving black market for K-Y Jelly


K-Y's illegal now!?  This is totally going to bum out my sheep.
2014-06-19 02:29:30 PM  
1 votes:
My father moved there a couple of years ago, found himself a new wife there. I really didn't want to know about this....
2014-06-19 02:28:57 PM  
1 votes:
Lemon Party at the Village tonight

splatter.com
2014-06-19 02:25:25 PM  
1 votes:
Sorta deserves the obvious/ironic tag.

"The Villages" are one of the most conservative/red locals in Florida. They send a buttload of cash to the RNC and Rick Scott. I guess as long as the rum and Viagra flow, they are content to let the poors eat cake...or bring Pablo in to clean Mrs Neusbaum's pool....
2014-06-19 02:24:45 PM  
1 votes:
I will not retire in the Villages.

Nothing but old people to hang with. Most of them Republicans.

I will retire in an age-balanced community in Florida. I like variety. So many young women have daddy issues. If I want old women, I can always troll the nursing homes.

/:-)
2014-06-19 02:19:53 PM  
1 votes:
But, on the plus side...

I now know how I'm financing my retirement.
2014-06-19 02:19:37 PM  
1 votes:

blatz514: Ahem...[people.virginia.edu image 54x11]


^^^^ Beat me to it. But, yeah subby this is not scary. THIS IS FLORIIIIIIIDAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!


mrvoyles.weebly.com
2014-06-19 02:18:46 PM  
1 votes:
"The Villages", you say?
3.bp.blogspot.com
2014-06-19 02:14:57 PM  
1 votes:

cgraves67: Pregnant? Aren't most of them post-menopausal?


4.bp.blogspot.com

Miracles of modern medicine.
2014-06-19 02:11:28 PM  
1 votes:
Ahem...people.virginia.edu
2014-06-19 02:11:01 PM  
1 votes:
www.loopedblog.com

And sometimes, Grandpa likes to watch Grandma getting pounded by a black guy while masturbating in the closet dressed as spiderman.
2014-06-19 12:17:32 PM  
1 votes:
My parents live there.  It's a pretty weird place.  When I visit I play shuffleboard, drink, swim, drink, drive a golf cart, drink, golf, drink, play bocce, and drink.  I can't wait to retire.

I hope this isn't true:

Resident Belinda Beard, 62, said: 'All of the women work hard to look good... Turn your back for a minute and someone will try to steal your husband'

My 72 year-old father has a bad back.  This could be trouble.
2014-06-19 11:49:36 AM  
1 votes:
Good for them.
2014-06-19 11:14:31 AM  
1 votes:
The mere thought of wrinkly people banging each other gives me the creeps. I bet it sounds like someone rubbing sandpaper back and forth on a sidewalk.

Ugh, I just threw up into my mouth a little.
2014-06-19 11:09:58 AM  
1 votes:
Should be slimy underbelly since they can't reach down there any more.
 
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