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(Daily Mail)   The seedy underbelly of Florida's retirement communities: "Every night is Saturday night in The Villages. And who's going to get pregnant?"   (dailymail.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Florida  
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10320 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jun 2014 at 2:08 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



129 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2014-06-19 02:37:04 PM  

ChipNASA: YES

[www.tampabay.com image 746x497]

Look....The Villages Single Dating Site....

http://www.perfectmatch.com/Dating/Florida/The-Villages/Senior-Datin g- Site.html

Let's Go SHOPPING!!!

Yep

[images.perfectmatch.com image 100x100]

[images.perfectmatch.com image 100x120]
[images.perfectmatch.com image 100x105]
[images.perfectmatch.com image 100x120]
[images.perfectmatch.com image 100x120]

[images.perfectmatch.com image 100x120]


Fiddy +   EWWWWWW


ChipNASA: Brave MILF Hunter. God Bless you, Sir.
 
2014-06-19 02:41:23 PM  
My buddy worked at an old persons home and yeah, that shiat goes on.  He told me there's this old lady that broke her hip, so she was wheelchair bound, but was still all about the cack.  They'd catch her giving out handkys in the dinning room, in the day room, in the tv room.  Now normally I wouldn't give a shiat, but c'mon when families are visiting with kids around.  When telling the story in person I try and give my best zombie moan as to what the men sound like during their experience.
 
2014-06-19 02:41:35 PM  
And who's going to get pregnant?


urbsocietymagazine.com
 
2014-06-19 02:42:27 PM  

dittybopper: FourDirections: The mere thought of wrinkly people banging each other gives me the creeps. I bet it sounds like someone rubbing sandpaper back and forth on a sidewalk.

Ugh, I just threw up into my mouth a little.

So you're going to take a vow of celibacy when you receive your AARP card in the mail?


He's just going to change shooting arms.
 
2014-06-19 02:43:37 PM  
Give subby a few more years and he will be using the Hero tag and buying a house there.
 
2014-06-19 02:44:01 PM  
What's four-legged, then two-legged, then three-legged, then sixteen-legged?
 
2014-06-19 02:44:05 PM  
A 49 year old man can be classified as a "boytoy"?

/not as old as I thought.....
 
2014-06-19 02:45:09 PM  

cgraves67: hardinparamedic: cgraves67: Pregnant? Aren't most of them post-menopausal?

Miracles of modern medicine.

I am familiar with that but I didn't realize it could worked on post-menopausal women. I thought it was for young women who have erratic ovulations. Also, why the fark are old, promiscuous women taking it? Nature is handing you birth control and you're turning it down?


It's probably Premarin they are taking, not Clomid. Conjugated estrogens.
Wonder what breast cancer rates are like in The Villages?
 
2014-06-19 02:46:04 PM  
I applaud them.
 
2014-06-19 02:47:50 PM  

Cdr.Murdock: A 49 year old man can be classified as a "boytoy"?

/not as old as I thought.....


Hell, I just turned 40, what would that make me?
 
2014-06-19 02:48:15 PM  

AirForceVet: I will not retire in the Villages.

Nothing but old people to hang with. Most of them Republicans.

I will retire in an age-balanced community in Florida. I like variety. So many young women have daddy issues. If I want old women, I can always troll the nursing homes.

/:-)


If it's the place I'm thinking of it straddles three counties and the developers play the counties off each other. They got themselves exempted from paying any school tax.  FoxNews radio plays out of the lampposts.
 
2014-06-19 02:48:45 PM  
ChipNASA: Brave M(G)ILF Hunter. God Bless you, Sir.

OH SO GROSS AND SHARP KNEES!!!!!!

images.perfectmatch.com
www.usnews.com

images.perfectmatch.com
pmi1.peoplemedia.com


Where do I check the box on the dating site for women with Parkinson's cause.....HAND JOBS
 
2014-06-19 02:48:58 PM  

Old Man Winter: I applaud them.



Applaud all you want. Just don't try stuffing dollar bills in their g-string.
 
2014-06-19 02:51:37 PM  
really no 'rippin and tearin' gifs yet?  ok I'll do it...

in honor of ChipNASA, gilf hunter and king fark of shiat island or whatever that phrase was...
 
2014-06-19 02:51:43 PM  
i1.ytimg.com

Denzel approves!
 
2014-06-19 02:53:00 PM  

Cerebral Knievel: Cdr.Murdock: A 49 year old man can be classified as a "boytoy"?

/not as old as I thought.....

Hell, I just turned 40, what would that make me?


Statutory.
 
2014-06-19 02:54:29 PM  

FourDirections: The mere thought of wrinkly people banging each other gives me the creeps. I bet it sounds like someone rubbing sandpaper back and forth on a sidewalk.

Ugh, I just threw up into my mouth a little.


Patty looks great for 68yrs but she may be an alcoholic.
 
2014-06-19 02:56:27 PM  
Well she's sexy and seventy
My little rock-roll queen
A little  bit obscene
Gotta let off a little steam
 
2014-06-19 02:57:11 PM  
oblig

i232.photobucket.com
 
2014-06-19 02:57:24 PM  
"Then you`ll fark me" - Doug stanhope
 
2014-06-19 02:58:08 PM  
When granny pops out her dentures, that's the cue...
 
2014-06-19 03:00:19 PM  
cdn.gifbay.com
 
2014-06-19 03:01:06 PM  
Oh, I'm going to need to turn up my Oxygen.
 
2014-06-19 03:01:40 PM  
 
2014-06-19 03:04:19 PM  

ZombieBear: I remember an incident vividly; While working at a nursing home, there was this woman who came in demanding, loudly, that the staff put an end to her mothers night time recreational activities. The staff just sat there straight faced and told the lady "Your mother is her own person, and if she wants to have sex with 5 or 6 different patients in a week, it is her own business, and we are not going to stop it." I could not tell if the woman was red from embarrassment, or red from anger, but it was hilarious.

Bonus, this all started because her daughter, (who only visits before work for a dozen minutes or so), had caught her mother mid-quoits. again...


There's same law or rule that you cannot intervene IIRC. From her time working in a nursing home, wy wife would tell me tales of walking into someone's room - the door would be open - and the old lady would be 'batin' right there on teh bed.
 
2014-06-19 03:06:25 PM  
Ah yes, not worrying about pregnancy means they're less likely to use condoms which means an uptick of AIDS and Hepatitis in retirement communities.
 
2014-06-19 03:08:32 PM  
My aunt lives in one of these communities down there, she drinks 4-5 times a week now and drives around in her golf cart everywhere. The place is crazy. I have not heard about any orgies but they party like there is no tomorrow (ha!).
Good for the old folks I say!! Have fun when you still can, a lot of you earned it.
 
2014-06-19 03:12:12 PM  

Dr Dreidel: Cerebral Knievel: Cdr.Murdock: A 49 year old man can be classified as a "boytoy"?

/not as old as I thought.....

Hell, I just turned 40, what would that make me?

Statutory.


I was kinda hoping for that "take a seat over there" guy to show up
 
2014-06-19 03:12:49 PM  

ChipNASA: [jay.mobile9.com image 240x320]


That'll do pig.
 
2014-06-19 03:14:25 PM  

gadian: Ah yes, not worrying about pregnancy means they're less likely to use condoms which means an uptick of AIDS and Hepatitis in retirement communities.


probably not enough time to develop full blown aids and at that point who cares?
 
2014-06-19 03:17:17 PM  
Apart from the STD's, this is actually great to hear. I don't want to lose my libido when I get old, and I don't want to lose opportunities to fulfil it. That said, I just hope I stay married because while I am just fine with the way my wife looks different than she did seven years and two kids ago, and I anticipate being attracted to her for many decades to come... I'm not sure I could be so enthusiastic as a septagenarian seeing another septegenarian naked for the first time.

stellarossa: ZombieBear: I remember an incident vividly; While working at a nursing home, there was this woman who came in demanding, loudly, that the staff put an end to her mothers night time recreational activities. The staff just sat there straight faced and told the lady "Your mother is her own person, and if she wants to have sex with 5 or 6 different patients in a week, it is her own business, and we are not going to stop it." I could not tell if the woman was red from embarrassment, or red from anger, but it was hilarious.

Bonus, this all started because her daughter, (who only visits before work for a dozen minutes or so), had caught her mother mid-quoits. again...


[****ing spell check strikes again I see]

There's same law or rule that you cannot intervene IIRC. From her time working in a nursing home, wy wife would tell me tales of walking into someone's room - the door would be open - and the old lady would be 'batin' right there on teh bed.

I would bloody well hope so.  Considering what even a crappy nursing home costs, they better not be trying to stop people from 'batin if that's what they want to do.
 
2014-06-19 03:17:38 PM  

chitownmike: probably not enough time to develop full blown aids and at that point who cares?


The local non-profits and health agencies trying to find ways to pay for the medication and stop the spread.
 
2014-06-19 03:18:56 PM  

LeroyBourne: My buddy worked at an old persons home and yeah, that shiat goes on.  He told me there's this old lady that broke her hip, so she was wheelchair bound, but was still all about the cack.  They'd catch her giving out handkys in the dinning room, in the day room, in the tv room.  Now normally I wouldn't give a shiat, but c'mon when families are visiting with kids around.  When telling the story in person I try and give my best zombie moan as to what the men sound like during their experience.


Did your " buddy " get a handy or is this all second hand information ?
 
2014-06-19 03:21:31 PM  

Old Man Winter: I applaud them.


Winter is coming
 
2014-06-19 03:23:04 PM  

Land_of_the_Magic_Dragon: LeroyBourne: My buddy worked at an old persons home and yeah, that shiat goes on.  He told me there's this old lady that broke her hip, so she was wheelchair bound, but was still all about the cack.  They'd catch her giving out handkys in the dinning room, in the day room, in the tv room.  Now normally I wouldn't give a shiat, but c'mon when families are visiting with kids around.  When telling the story in person I try and give my best zombie moan as to what the men sound like during their experience.

Did your " buddy " get a handy or is this all second hand information ?


No, he was one of the people that had to stop her, she was/is notorious.  He told me story years ago, so it's entirely plausible she's dead now giving out handkys in the sky.
 
2014-06-19 03:25:34 PM  

LeroyBourne: it's entirely plausible she's dead now giving out handkys in the sky.



Jacking off Jesus as we speak
 
2014-06-19 03:28:43 PM  
Good for them!  As long as they are having fun who cares?  Kinda makes me want to find the book.

I plan on being an old hippie in a log cabin by the lake.
 
2014-06-19 03:33:42 PM  
My folks fully retire in November. I'm pretty sure they are staying in Delaware, but still dont want to walk in on any of this.
 
2014-06-19 03:34:12 PM  

Snarfangel: Some men like to pick up cougars.
[home.midwest.net image 381x451]

Look at that shameless female, hanging on him like that!


After about 45 the correct description is saber-tooth

(Note, over-45 Cougars do not appreciate having this pointed out)
 
2014-06-19 03:35:20 PM  
Senior living doesn't sound all that bad.

Wake up, get high, go for a walk, boink one of your several friends w/benefits, score some more dope, hang at the pool, call someone else on the friends list, take a nap, maybe read some....

Sounds like being a teenager again.

/except for the being three hundred years old thing, all is well.
 
2014-06-19 03:35:37 PM  

hardinparamedic: ChipNASA: YES

ChipNASA: Brave Grand-MILF Hunter. God Bless you, Sir.

 
2014-06-19 03:37:15 PM  

cgraves67: Pregnant? Aren't most of them post-menopausal?


Apparently, you've missed the intended tone of that question. It was meant to convey that no one will be getting pregnant.
 
2014-06-19 03:38:05 PM  
Well, my vacation plans have been made.
 
2014-06-19 03:42:38 PM  

FourDirections: The mere thought of wrinkly people banging each other gives me the creeps. I bet it sounds like someone rubbing sandpaper back and forth on a sidewalk.

Ugh, I just threw up into my mouth a little.


i58.tinypic.com
 
2014-06-19 03:43:27 PM  
Somewhere, off the coast of Florida...

www.reactiongifs.com

I'll probably retire somewhere in Florida, but it isn't going to be The Villages, or Del Boca Vista.  It'll be a little place, on a little canal, and I'll kayak and fish as long as my body lets me.
 
2014-06-19 03:44:50 PM  

AFKobel: FTFA:  "Dubbed Disney World for old people, there are 10 women to every man and their antics would make Mickey Mouse blush"

Uh... do you really have to work that hard to make Mickey Mouse blush?


Warning: Contains raunchy language that would make Mickey Mouse blush.

http://robot6.comicbookresources.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/pir ate s5-700x334.jpg
 
2014-06-19 03:47:18 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-06-19 03:47:32 PM  

Nix Nightbird: If someone had told me, when I was in my highly active 20s, that sex would be even better and quite frequent in my 40s I would have laughed and doubted it, because I thought hitting 30 meant the end of life as I knew it.


You sound unmarried.
 
2014-06-19 03:53:20 PM  
anyone read this?   kind of reminds me of this retirement place (after they get their new bodies)...

www.scificool.com
 
2014-06-19 03:53:48 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
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