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(CNN)   Chaos in Iraq is worrying everyone except oil companies and the people who owns their stocks. They're rolling around in piles of money and snorting coke of hookers' asses   (money.cnn.com) divider line 76
    More: Obvious, Iraq, Anadarko Petroleum, iraq crisis, Devon Energy, equity analyst, SPDR, CHEVRON CORP., APC  
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1999 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jun 2014 at 3:44 PM (6 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-06-18 12:34:26 PM
The chaos in Iraq is understandably distressing many, but in a weird twist, investors who own energy stocks are benefiting from the unfortunate situation.

How is that a weird twist? The crisis threatens possible oil production in a region of the world responsible for most of the world's oil production. Supply and demand is a "weird twist" nowadays?
 
2014-06-18 02:11:07 PM

miss diminutive: The chaos in Iraq is understandably distressing many, ironically but in a weird twist, investors who own energy stocks are benefiting from the unfortunate situation.

How is that a weird twist? The crisis threatens possible oil production in a region of the world responsible for most of the world's oil production. Supply and demand is a "weird twist" nowadays?


FTFY

author was searching for the wrong word.
 
2014-06-18 03:45:46 PM
People who owns? That aren't right.
 
2014-06-18 03:46:14 PM

miss diminutive: The chaos in Iraq is understandably distressing many, but in a weird twist, investors who own energy stocks are benefiting from the unfortunate situation.

How is that a weird twist? The crisis threatens possible oil production in a region of the world responsible for most of the world's oil production. Supply and demand is a "weird twist" nowadays?


They were going to lose a lot of money, but then they learned this one weird trick.  Now stock analysts HATE them!
 
2014-06-18 03:47:58 PM
Is it out of or off of hookers' asses? Please answer quickly I don't want to guess wrong.
 
2014-06-18 03:48:06 PM

miss diminutive: The chaos in Iraq is understandably distressing many, but in a weird twist, investors who own energy stocks are benefiting from the unfortunate situation.

How is that a weird twist? The crisis threatens possible oil production in a region of the world responsible for most of the world's oil production. Supply and demand is a "weird twist" nowadays?


Anybody who still thinks crude oil prices have anything to do with quaint notions like 'Supply and Demand' really hasn't been paying attention
 
2014-06-18 03:49:59 PM

Frederf: Is it out of or off of hookers' asses? Please answer quickly I don't want to guess wrong.


Follow your heart.
 
2014-06-18 03:50:03 PM

Frederf: Is it out of or off of hookers' asses? Please answer quickly I don't want to guess wrong.


I like outies
 
2014-06-18 03:51:11 PM
Coke of hooker's ass? I've heard of blowing it up an ass but not snorting out of an ass.
 
2014-06-18 03:51:26 PM

MFAWG: miss diminutive: The chaos in Iraq is understandably distressing many, but in a weird twist, investors who own energy stocks are benefiting from the unfortunate situation.

How is that a weird twist? The crisis threatens possible oil production in a region of the world responsible for most of the world's oil production. Supply and demand is a "weird twist" nowadays?

Anybody who still thinks crude oil prices have anything to do with quaint notions like 'Supply and Demand' really hasn't been paying attention


Oil prices only have to do with vertical integration.

http://smallbusiness.chron.com/stages-vertical-integration-oil-indus tr y-58830.html
 
2014-06-18 03:51:30 PM

untaken_name: People who owns? That aren't right.


The whole headline is a grammatical abortion.
 
2014-06-18 03:51:49 PM
Frederf: Is it out of or off of hookers' asses? Please answer quickly I don't want to guess wrong.

off of.
 
2014-06-18 03:52:21 PM

Frederf: Is it out of or off of hookers' asses? Please answer quickly I don't want to guess wrong.


The coke is made of hooker ass-meat.  Everybody knows coke goes straight to your ass, scienticians have found a way to take hooker asses and distill the coke.
 
2014-06-18 03:52:31 PM
Americas dependence in oil has always been our number one national security concern. And we continue to ignore the problem and only treat the symptoms(Terrorism,Iraq).
 
2014-06-18 03:52:35 PM
I hope they farking choke on their profits and die of cancer.

Seriously...  The oil companies have been raping the economy of the world while at the same time destroying the environment.  And since nothing seems to be possible in order to rid ourselves of our dependence on them, they enthusiastically rape us even harder every chance they get.

I am personally praying for the day when the entire world can finally say "Fark you!  We no longer need your oil".
I mean, it's either going to get to that point, or we'll all die from the environmental impact they are causing.  Unfortunately, it seems pretty clear that the later is the more probably outcome.
 
2014-06-18 03:52:55 PM

MFAWG: miss diminutive: The chaos in Iraq is understandably distressing many, but in a weird twist, investors who own energy stocks are benefiting from the unfortunate situation.

How is that a weird twist? The crisis threatens possible oil production in a region of the world responsible for most of the world's oil production. Supply and demand is a "weird twist" nowadays?

Anybody who still thinks crude oil prices have anything to do with quaint notions like 'Supply and Demand' really hasn't been paying attention



The speculative nature of commodities does not invalidate the law of Supply and Demand.

Personally I'm sickened by Obama's potential involvement of US forces.  NO BLOOD FOR OIL!  He's clearly trying to make some money for his oil buddies and Haliburton.
 
2014-06-18 03:54:50 PM
"They're rolling around in piles of money and snorting coke of hookers' asses"  - and what they are enjoying Tea and having long converstations about life with their Mother right now?
 
2014-06-18 03:55:04 PM

untaken_name: People who owns? That aren't right.


I am be impressinated by Subby's headlines.
 
2014-06-18 03:55:08 PM

GoldSpider: untaken_name: People who owns? That aren't right.

The whole headline is a grammatical abortion.


Ugh.  That headline really is as horrifying as Tom Delay having sexual relations with Laura Ingram.
 
2014-06-18 03:55:28 PM

Frederf: out of or off of hookers' asses?


out of and you ask her to fart in your face.
 
2014-06-18 03:56:07 PM

durbnpoisn: I hope they farking choke on their profits and die of cancer.

Seriously...  The oil companies have been raping the economy of the world while at the same time destroying the environment.  And since nothing seems to be possible in order to rid ourselves of our dependence on them, they enthusiastically rape us even harder every chance they get.

I am personally praying for the day when the entire world can finally say "Fark you!  We no longer need your oil".
I mean, it's either going to get to that point, or we'll all die from the environmental impact they are causing.  Unfortunately, it seems pretty clear that the later is the more probably outcome.



Aww, it's so cute when libtards try to discuss things they don't understand.  "Everything should be free.. health care! energy!  food!  Anyone who makes money off of things is evil corporateionasldfjwhwargbargl  "
 
2014-06-18 03:56:47 PM
Subby, your headline looks like a facebook comment.
 
2014-06-18 03:57:50 PM
img.photobucket.com
Remember when this was the answer to everything?
 
2014-06-18 03:58:17 PM
They're rolling around in piles of money and snorting coke off hookers' asses


and the American Federal Government they own will protect them for their efforts.  that is one of the reasons why they love Freedom and 'murica so much.
 
2014-06-18 03:59:06 PM
Black Gold


Texas Tea.
 
2014-06-18 03:59:21 PM
There is nothing finer than the coke of a hooker's ass.  It has a bit of an earthy aftertaste, but it's so worth it.  And snorting a hooker's ass is a lot more enjoyable than digging a hole in the backyard in which to bury it.
 
2014-06-18 03:59:58 PM
um, how many typos in the headl.....ah, fark it.
 
2014-06-18 04:00:37 PM

OneFretAway: Ugh.  That headline really is as horrifying as Tom Delay having sexual relations with Laura Ingram Helen Thomas.


Now with extra moist.
 
2014-06-18 04:02:02 PM
They're rolling around in piles of money and snorting coke of hookers' asses

Isn't that what they've always done after work on Tuesday's anyway?
 
2014-06-18 04:02:35 PM

Shrugging Atlas: There is nothing finer than the coke of a hooker's ass.  It has a bit of an earthy aftertaste, but it's so worth it.   And snorting a hooker's ass is a lot more enjoyable than digging a hole in the backyard in which to bury it.


Pearl of wisdom, that.
 
2014-06-18 04:03:05 PM

Phineas: durbnpoisn: I hope they farking choke on their profits and die of cancer.

Seriously...  The oil companies have been raping the economy of the world while at the same time destroying the environment.  And since nothing seems to be possible in order to rid ourselves of our dependence on them, they enthusiastically rape us even harder every chance they get.

I am personally praying for the day when the entire world can finally say "Fark you!  We no longer need your oil".
I mean, it's either going to get to that point, or we'll all die from the environmental impact they are causing.  Unfortunately, it seems pretty clear that the later is the more probably outcome.


Aww, it's so cute when libtards try to discuss things they don't understand.  "Everything should be free.. health care! energy!  food!  Anyone who makes money off of things is evil corporateionasldfjwhwargbargl  "


Pfft...  Liberal's got nothing to do with it.  And I'm not saying things should be free.  And exactly what the hell do I not understand?!
What I'm saying is that the entire world is being held hostage by these bastards.  And at the same time, it's a product that is killing the environment.

You can poke fun at my attitude all you want.  But it doesn't change the fact that I'm right.
Unless you're one of those that doesn't believe that human activity (specifically the use of fossil fuels) is totally upsetting the natural carbon cycle of the planet.  If that's the case, there is no point in arguing.
 
2014-06-18 04:03:48 PM

shirtsbyeric: Remember when this was the answer to everything?


We're not going back. I noticed that the Iraqi Army seems to have grown a spine once Shells refinery was threatened.
 
2014-06-18 04:04:54 PM

child_god: Coke of hooker's ass? I've heard of blowing it up an ass but not snorting out of an ass.


No, coke OF ass. They grind up hooker's ass', and mix it into the powder. Much like a roast rump, gives it a nice meaty flavor.
 
2014-06-18 04:05:26 PM

Amish Tech Support: Americas dependence in oil has always been our number one national security concern. And we continue to ignore the problem and only treat the symptoms(Terrorism,Iraq).


isn't anyone gonna this this!?

if someone doesn't soon, i will.
 
2014-06-18 04:06:05 PM

Shrugging Atlas: There is nothing finer than the coke of a hooker's ass.  It has a bit of an earthy aftertaste, but it's so worth it.  And snorting a hooker's ass is a lot more enjoyable than digging a hole in the backyard in which to bury it.


But where do you put the strOH MY GOD NO ONE ANSWER THIS
 
2014-06-18 04:06:46 PM

Shrugging Atlas: There is nothing finer than the coke of a hooker's ass.  It has a bit of an earthy aftertaste, but it's so worth it.  And snorting a hooker's ass is a lot more enjoyable than digging a hole in the backyard in which to bury it.


I just consider that the beginning of the foreplay for the next night's hooker.
 
2014-06-18 04:07:59 PM
Poor Dick Cheney.  Now out of office, unable to pull any strings.  I hope he can weather the coming oil shock with only his Halliburton holdings, dirty bad government pension for life, and the pending royalties from his upcoming book "If I Did It" to fall back on.
 
2014-06-18 04:09:28 PM
Campbells new 'Coke of Hookers Asses' soup.

Good for what ailes ya
 
2014-06-18 04:11:39 PM
So what you're telling me is that the Sunni-dominated energy exporter right next door to Iraq, who has stagnant-to-shrinking-output, who already isn't pleased with the Shia-centric Iraq-Iran alliance crowding out their influence over Iraq's energy policy, who has a history of exporting radical islam in general and jihadis in particular, is actually *benefitting* from a bunch of Sunni jihadis stiring the pot in Iraq?

That *is* weird...
 
2014-06-18 04:13:02 PM

MurphyMurphy: Campbells new 'Coke of Hookers Asses' soup.

Good for what ailes ya


It comes with a salad. But tossing is extra.
 
2014-06-18 04:14:47 PM
Oil stocks have been hot for two years.  I'm up 20% on a fracker in 2 months.  Saying that it's because of this thing that happened this month is rather Post hoc ergo propter hoc.
 
2014-06-18 04:15:40 PM
Submitter obviously works for the Daily News.
 
2014-06-18 04:16:46 PM

Isitoveryet: Amish Tech Support: Americas dependence in oil has always been our number one national security concern. And we continue to ignore the problem and only treat the symptoms(Terrorism,Iraq).

isn't anyone gonna this this!?

if someone doesn't soon, i will.


I'll this it.  But the problem is larger than the U.S.  Europe needs a lot of the oil that comes from the Middle East and Russia.  Putin has already threatened the supply of energy to Europe if he gets too much resistance over his plans for Ukraine.  Putin is also a player in Syria, whose insurgency, you may have noticed, is also a participant in the Iraq insurgency.

It would be pretty easy to just go isolationist and let all of those Middle East countries duke it out and let Europe find its energy where it may.  But with the globalization of EVERYTHING, I'm not sure its even possible for the U.S. to be isolationist anymore.

But if you are suggesting that becoming energy independent would give us a lot of leverage we now lack, you're right.  It would allow us a completely different perspective in the world.
 
2014-06-18 04:19:55 PM
Oil companies are run by old money, that usually means much deeper problems than hookers and blow (which is for the nouveau riche). Just imagine having BILLIONS and still be willing to cut people's throats for more. Hint: Hide your kids and animals.
 
2014-06-18 04:21:32 PM

Frederf: Is it out of or off of hookers' asses? Please answer quickly I don't want to guess wrong.


Take a chance, life is short.  Ride the ass lightning!

/or chicken lightning
 
2014-06-18 04:23:19 PM
I ownz all of teh stockz.
 
2014-06-18 04:24:27 PM

untaken_name: People who owns? That aren't right.


What am wrong with that?
 
2014-06-18 04:27:45 PM
Looks like I picked the right time at the beginning of this year to purchase an Energy ETF. Up 14.5% YTD.

Pure dumb luck, but I need all the luck I can get.
 
2014-06-18 04:30:54 PM

shirtsbyeric: [img.photobucket.com image 552x658]
Remember when this was the answer to everything?


Was the picture's caption also written by Subby?
 
2014-06-18 04:30:55 PM

miss diminutive: The chaos in Iraq is understandably distressing many, but in a weird twist, investors who own energy stocks are benefiting from the unfortunate situation.

How is that a weird twist? The crisis threatens possible oil production in a region of the world responsible for most of the world's oil production. Supply and demand is a "weird twist" nowadays?


The thing is, for the most part, this little war doesn't actually threaten oil production.  Most oil production in Iraq is in the deep south near the Gulf, which is deep inside Shia territory, or in areas controlled by the Kurds (and ISIS is smart enough not to fark with the Kurds).  There's an oil refinery in the middle of Iraq that's being battled over, but all that means is that Iraqis might have to import some gasoline and diesel to make up for the lack of refining capacity (which might increase the demand (not hurt supply, although the effect is similiar) for oil a little bit).

So, nervous nellies drive up the price of oil a bit on basically unfounded fears, increasing the oil companies' profits.
 
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