Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Talking Points Memo)   Oy vey Rick Perry thinks he is Jewish. What a shmuck   (talkingpointsmemo.com ) divider line
    More: Amusing, Rick Perry, Jewish, Mark Liebovitch  
•       •       •

2871 clicks; posted to Politics » on 17 Jun 2014 at 2:29 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



142 Comments   (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2014-06-17 12:34:09 PM  
www.trbimg.com

"Nice try, Governor Goodhair."
 
2014-06-17 12:41:50 PM  
img.fark.net

Approves.
 
2014-06-17 12:42:22 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: [www.trbimg.com image 600x400]

"Nice try, Governor Goodhair."


Kinky gave me a cigar last week at a JCC

//really, really really
 
2014-06-17 12:44:11 PM  
Who, day and night, must fumble for an answer
Sling a lot of bullshiat, comb and primp his hair
And who, day and night, as leader of the state
Must herp the finest derp of all
The Gov'nor! The Gov'nor! Tradition!!
 
2014-06-17 12:46:51 PM  
can the link get changed to the NYTimes article? Link
 
2014-06-17 12:48:23 PM  
"I'm more Jewish than you think I am," he told Leibovitch over a corned-beef Reuben. "I read the part of the Bible that said the Jews are God's chosen people."

This should tell you all you need to know about the GOP, when this guy can make a serious run for President as a Republican.
 
2014-06-17 12:49:18 PM  
putz
 
2014-06-17 12:50:44 PM  
"I'm more Jewish than you think I am," he told Leibovitch over a corned-beef Reuben. "I read the part of the Bible that said the Jews are God's chosen people."

I'm more Jewish than that.  I had a bagel this morning.
 
2014-06-17 12:52:17 PM  
So is he proclaiming himself to be one of God's chosen people, or is he hinting that an old man cut the tip of his penis off?
 
2014-06-17 12:54:25 PM  
That's Rick the Brain. Everybody knows Rick the Brain. If it's something you want forgotten, he's the man to speak to. Pretends he's Jewish. Wishes he was Jewish. Even tells his family they're Jewish, but he's about as Jewish as he is a a farking monkey. He thinks it's good for business. And in politics, it is good for business.
 
2014-06-17 12:55:49 PM  
He probably abides by Shiluach haken
 
2014-06-17 12:56:00 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: "I'm more Jewish than you think I am


THEN PROVE IT RICK, YOU COCK, AND GO JUMP IN A FARKING FURNACE!
 
2014-06-17 12:56:42 PM  
oh and window seat, please, and I'll need a Kosher meal, too.
 
2014-06-17 12:59:11 PM  
Perry told Liebovitch he just might move to California when his third and final term as governor ends in January.

i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-06-17 01:09:04 PM  
He's just in it for the jokes.
 
2014-06-17 01:13:19 PM  
wait, he wants to come to California? Can we revoke his passport or something? We don't want his kind here... especially since they have been running his anti-California business commercials non stop lately.
 
2014-06-17 01:15:57 PM  

zedster: DjangoStonereaver: [www.trbimg.com image 600x400]

"Nice try, Governor Goodhair."

Kinky gave me a cigar last week at a JCC

//really, really really


Crap.  I had no idea he was in town.  But I can't say I follow the guest speakers at the DC JCC, mainly
because I'm not Jewish.

/Loves the Kinkster, even if he's gone a wee bit 'round the bend since Obama's election.
 
2014-06-17 01:38:22 PM  

cannotsuggestaname: We don't want his kind here...


anti-Semite!
 
2014-06-17 01:39:48 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: zedster: DjangoStonereaver: [www.trbimg.com image 600x400]

"Nice try, Governor Goodhair."

Kinky gave me a cigar last week at a JCC

//really, really really

Crap.  I had no idea he was in town.  But I can't say I follow the guest speakers at the DC JCC, mainly
because I'm not Jewish.

/Loves the Kinkster, even if he's gone a wee bit 'round the bend since Obama's election.


It was a fun show, he did his songs, a few vaudeville joke breaks and read a chapter from his current book. All in all just what you expect
I went up to him afterwards and said it was a shame he no longer was making Kinky cigars he, said they are restarting with a new company (yes!) and he would have given me one of his but he only had one left, than he says oh what the hell and gives me the last Kinky Friedman Texas Star he had on him!
 
2014-06-17 01:54:57 PM  

zedster: DjangoStonereaver: zedster: DjangoStonereaver: [www.trbimg.com image 600x400]

"Nice try, Governor Goodhair."

Kinky gave me a cigar last week at a JCC

//really, really really

Crap.  I had no idea he was in town.  But I can't say I follow the guest speakers at the DC JCC, mainly
because I'm not Jewish.

/Loves the Kinkster, even if he's gone a wee bit 'round the bend since Obama's election.

It was a fun show, he did his songs, a few vaudeville joke breaks and read a chapter from his current book. All in all just what you expect
I went up to him afterwards and said it was a shame he no longer was making Kinky cigars he, said they are restarting with a new company (yes!) and he would have given me one of his but he only had one left, than he says oh what the hell and gives me the last Kinky Friedman Texas Star he had on him!


That would win you a month of TF from me if you weren't already a TF'er, my friend, in Texas-worthy
Yellow 3.

You are favorited as "Got to touch the Kinkster".
 
2014-06-17 02:06:43 PM  
theconnection.lucianne.com

Hosti gezen in dayne lebn?
 
2014-06-17 02:07:57 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: That would win you a month of TF from me if you weren't already a TF'er, my friend, in Texas-worthy
Yellow 3.

You are favorited as "Got to touch the Kinkster".



I also accept cigars at Shelly's Backroom in place of TF :-)

I know I missed the last DC Fark party being outside of town, need to work on that
 
2014-06-17 02:12:42 PM  

cannotsuggestaname: wait, he wants to come to California? Can we revoke his passport or something? We don't want his kind here... especially since they have been running his anti-California business commercials non stop lately.


That he's apparently determined to leave shows his real long-term interest in Texas. It's akin to lighting the fuse on the bomb, then running to get the hell out of there before the whole thing blows up. AND he's contemplating going to a state that he's criticized as the antithesis of everything Texan.

I guess the fact he's so comfortable casually admitting to being a selfish, unprincipled, lying, disingenuous, hypocritical opportunist says something about the GOP. And I thought I hated him before!
 
2014-06-17 02:15:18 PM  
Aw c'mon.  Give the guy a break.  Do you know how difficult it is to ind a Shabbos Goy who will actually reload a pistol for you?
 
2014-06-17 02:22:03 PM  
Can I give him his bris then?

/Honey, get my chainsaw.
 
2014-06-17 02:25:30 PM  

Lionel Mandrake: "I'm more Jewish than you think I am," he told Leibovitch over a corned-beef Reuben. "I read the part of the Bible that said the Jews are God's chosen people."

I'm more Jewish than that.  I had a bagel this morning.


I had rugelach after my sandwich at lunch.  I'm pretty sure I'm Moses now.
 
2014-06-17 02:30:12 PM  

strangeguitar: Can I give him his bris then?

/Honey, get my chainsaw.


If his general behavior is any indication, the dude seems to be trying to compensate for something, so I'm guessing that a pair of nail clippers would do the trick for that particular job.
 
2014-06-17 02:32:03 PM  
The "smart glasses" still aren't working.
 
2014-06-17 02:32:03 PM  

Cyberluddite: If his general behavior is any indication, the dude seems to be trying to compensate for something, so I'm guessing that a pair of nail clippers would do the trick for that particular job.


They'd be tough to get around his neck in a single snip tho.. Chainsaw seems much more efficient, although somewhat messy.
 
2014-06-17 02:32:49 PM  
zedster:

Kinky gave me a cigar last week at a JCC

If you know what I mean.
 
2014-06-17 02:32:59 PM  

Cyberluddite: strangeguitar: Can I give him his bris then?

/Honey, get my chainsaw.

If his general behavior is any indication, the dude seems to be trying to compensate for something, so I'm guessing that a pair of nail clippers would do the trick for that particular job.


Medium grit sand paper
 
2014-06-17 02:33:37 PM  
IIRC, it was Anthony Bourdain who said that Jews and Texans are the only people do an exceptional job of cooking brisket.
 
2014-06-17 02:34:28 PM  
"I'm more Jewish than you think I am," he told Leibovitch over a corned-beef Reuben.

Don't whip it out don't whip it out, oh please don't

"I read the part of the Bible that said the Jews are God's chosen people."

Oh.

...What?
 
2014-06-17 02:36:03 PM  
Why the barking mad rabid F*CK does that Texican asshole wanna move to Cali!!??

We're a buncha gods damn commies n sh*t here.
 
2014-06-17 02:37:44 PM  
The traffic jam that has now been created by the number of people wanting to become mohels is unprecedented. The fact that this is would be a life time job as there is no end to that pr!ck makes it even more so.
 
2014-06-17 02:40:11 PM  
Schmuck is a Yiddish word and he is a penis so...
 
2014-06-17 02:40:30 PM  
Rick Perry is very Jewish. Hell, he could be the archetype of the schlemiel stock character.
 
2014-06-17 02:40:57 PM  

ManateeGag: cannotsuggestaname: We don't want his kind here...

anti-Semite!


Actually, we're more Yo-semite out here
 
2014-06-17 02:41:37 PM  
 
2014-06-17 02:42:14 PM  

thamike: "I'm more Jewish than you think I am," he told Leibovitch over a corned-beef Reuben.

Don't whip it out don't whip it out, oh please don't

"I read the part of the Bible that said the Jews are God's chosen people."

Oh.

...What?


He read one line in Exodus, therefore, he's as Jewish as farking Tevye! 300 years of beautiful tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax Kinky Friedman, you're godDAMN RIGHT HE'S LIVING IN THE PAST!!

netizencain: He probably abides by Shiluach haken


Oh please; he's never sent a loon out of his sight in his life.
 
2014-06-17 02:42:26 PM  
"I'm more Jewish than you think I am," he told Leibovitch over a corned-beef Reuben. "I read the part of the Bible that said the Jews are God's chosen people."

That...that's it?

I have a Jewish name and my old place had a mezuzah by the door. By this standard I'm like the chief Rabbi of Israel.
 
2014-06-17 02:42:29 PM  
That Goyim bastard thinks he's a MOT?
Jesus!

www.wearysloth.com

What?
 
2014-06-17 02:42:30 PM  
I heard he also has a ranch called K*kehead.
 
2014-06-17 02:42:54 PM  
"I'm more Jewish than you think I am," he told Leibovitch over a corned-beef Reuben.

"I read the part of the Bible that said the Jews are God's chosen people."


He also read Of Mice And Men, which probably explains why he keeps appearing more retarded than I thought he was.
 
2014-06-17 02:43:25 PM  
Oh, he read the part of the bible where the Jews are god's chosen people.

Did he miss the part where Jesus said:

"I know that you are descendants of Abraham yet you seek to kill me, because my word finds no place in you. I speak of what I have seen with my Father, and you do what you have heard from your father. They answered him, "Abraham is our father." Jesus said to them, "If you were Abraham's children, you would do what Abraham did. ... You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father's desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, and has nothing to do with the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks according to his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies. But, because I tell the truth, you do not believe me. Which of you convicts me of sin? If I tell the truth, why do you not believe me? He who is of God hears the words of God; the reason why you do not hear them is you are not of God."

Because the Nazis sure as hell didn't.
 
2014-06-17 02:44:01 PM  
Ricky, why don't you run for president?  You know your brother, the DOCTOR, is thinking about it.
 
2014-06-17 02:44:05 PM  
"I'm more Jewish than you think I am," he told Leibovitch over a corned-beef Reuben. "I read the part of the Bible that said the Jews are God's chosen people."

What the hell is that even supposed to mean? Also, doesn't he know that Jews are self-depricating, not self-aggrandizing?

netizencain: He probably abides by Shiluach haken


With the amount of chickens he farks he doesn't eat eggs because he's afraid they might be his and is against abortion.
 
2014-06-17 02:44:12 PM  
Has anyone pointed out to Gov. OOPS Goodhair that a Reuben sandwich is treif?
 
2014-06-17 02:44:39 PM  
2.bp.blogspot.com
Rick Perry says he's Jewish just so he can tell jokes.

/he has a ranch named YidHead.
 
2014-06-17 02:44:43 PM  
I am more interested in him wanting to move to the dystopia of California where everyone with any sense is moving to Texas to get away from the evil regulations and unbearable taxes..
 
Displayed 50 of 142 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report