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(Sun Sentinel)   Man tells cops he was "only joking" when he doused his wife with gasoline and tried to set her on fire, then threatened her with knives when he couldn't get a spark. Yeah, that's hilarious   (sun-sentinel.com) divider line 55
    More: Florida  
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2807 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jun 2014 at 3:36 AM (15 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



55 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-06-17 12:25:57 AM
o_O
 
2014-06-17 02:33:56 AM
 
2014-06-17 03:14:10 AM
Samlall denied pouring gasoline on his wife and the bed, and said the fuel spill was accidental. He only wanted to "scare her, so she would stop bothering" him, according to Bromberg's report.

Seems legit.
 
2014-06-17 03:43:14 AM
Sometimes you have to tell them twice with humor
 
2014-06-17 03:58:13 AM
www.ratewall.com

"...And what is the deal with those convenience store lighters?"

Ha ha ha

"I mean you want to start a campfire, they work just fine. You want to smoke a cigarette, no problem. But you dump some gasoline on the wife and try to burn her into a charcoal briquette, and they REFUSE to work. What's the deal with that?"

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

"...and what is a briquette anyway? Is it a miniature brick? I am NOT living in a house made of briquettes. Why? Obviously, it's a FIRE HAZARD!"

HA HA HA HA HA HA!!
 
2014-06-17 03:58:40 AM
He's clearly innocent, he was winking.
 
2014-06-17 03:59:29 AM
I guess you had to be there.
 
2014-06-17 03:59:50 AM
They'll be back together in a week no doubt.
 
2014-06-17 04:07:19 AM
Understandable. After all, she had turned him into a newt.
 
2014-06-17 04:34:16 AM
Subby sounds like a humorless asshole.
 
2014-06-17 04:39:59 AM

img.fark.net

 
2014-06-17 04:58:06 AM
In other news, Zippos suck the puss from a dead leper's socks. Use a Bic when trying to commit serious bodily harm to your loved one.
 
2014-06-17 05:04:35 AM
The Aristocrats!
 
2014-06-17 05:10:12 AM
And to the right: a thread full of Farkers, all of whom think they're funnier.
 
2014-06-17 05:17:17 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2014-06-17 05:22:39 AM

MooseUpNorth: And to the right: a thread full of Farkers, all of whom think they're funnier.


Is that a problem? It's a sick, twisted, farked up world. Some of use would rather tell jokes about it than drink ourselves into a coma.

img.fark.net
 
2014-06-17 05:25:37 AM
Lucky he lives in a patriarchy or he'd likely end up in trouble for that.
 
2014-06-17 05:27:02 AM
The story is interesting, sure. But the really good stuff is in the comments:

FortLaudResi
This is all part of a plot to keep us distracted so they can take away our guns!

This is all part of the agenda by the government to take away our guns. This is a distraction to keep people off the real agenda. Just read this for the truth:
 http://www.thedailysheeple.com/sandy-hook-redux-obama-officials-conf ir m-that-it-was-a-drill-and-no-children-died_062014#comment-1436972428

...and the comments with that are really special.
 
2014-06-17 05:29:27 AM
Floridian Trifecta in play....
 
2014-06-17 06:07:53 AM
Bigmouth strikes again.
 
2014-06-17 06:30:12 AM

FuzedBox: MooseUpNorth: And to the right: a thread full of Farkers, all of whom think they're funnier.

Is that a problem? It's a sick, twisted, farked up world. Some of use would rather tell jokes about it than drink ourselves into a coma.

[img.fark.net image 490x326]


Why not both?
 
2014-06-17 06:34:15 AM
Is she hot?
 
2014-06-17 06:41:10 AM
Some people just can't take a joke.

It's all in the context, people.

Way to ruin such a heart-warming story.
 
2014-06-17 06:41:40 AM
What do you have to do to be charged with "intent to kill"?
/Boy, some deity was watching over that woman.
//She must be really abused to defend him like that, the bastard.
 
2014-06-17 06:42:01 AM

DanZero: Obligatory


Not the Weird Al song "I was Only Kidding?"
 
2014-06-17 06:43:40 AM

macross87: Floridian Trifecta in play....


You are joking right?
You've got to be trollin'.

Florida is the reason Fark exists.

/hence the Florida tag.
 
2014-06-17 06:49:41 AM

RayD8: Is she hot?


She was a Bic flick away from being smoking hot
 
2014-06-17 06:50:47 AM

Resident Muslim: macross87: Floridian Trifecta in play....

You are joking right?
You've got to be trollin'.

Florida is the reason Fark exists.

/hence the Florida tag.


Three from Florida is a slow morning.
 
2014-06-17 07:09:26 AM
It would have been funnier if he had actually set her on fire, and her name was Barbie, and then he threw shrimp at her, hahahahaha. Get it? Get? I'll give you a hint: think Australian.
I bet that guy's fun at parties.
 
2014-06-17 07:10:27 AM

DrBenway: The story is interesting, sure. But the really good stuff is in the comments:

FortLaudResi
This is all part of a plot to keep us distracted so they can take away our guns!

This is all part of the agenda by the government to take away our guns. This is a distraction to keep people off the real agenda. Just read this for the truth:  http://www.thedailysheeple.com/sandy-hook-redux-obama-officials-conf ir m-that-it-was-a-drill-and-no-children-died_062014#comment-1436972428

...and the comments with that are really special.


Ugh... It's way too early for that much concentrated weapons grade derp...
 
2014-06-17 07:15:43 AM

Witness99: It would have been funnier if he had actually set her on fire, and her name was Barbie, and then he threw shrimp at her, hahahahaha. Get it? Get? I'll give you a hint: think Australian.


Hitler? Is she Jewish? Oh, Barbie, Barbs, like Barbra Streisand! I get it! Not sure where the shrimp fits in, though...
 
2014-06-17 07:17:36 AM

wildcardjack: Resident Muslim: macross87: Floridian Trifecta in play....

You are joking right?
You've got to be trollin'.

Florida is the reason Fark exists.

/hence the Florida tag.

Three from Florida is a slow morning.


In a row?
 
2014-06-17 07:18:17 AM
Gasoline and knives, where have I see that before?

www.screeninsults.com
 
2014-06-17 07:19:23 AM
I thought women liked a man with a sense of humor.
Pffft! Wimmin!
No pleasin em
 
2014-06-17 07:22:38 AM
Have you noticed here lately that whenever some comedian threatens to kill, they were either joking or they start going on about their First Amendment right to free speech. "I can threaten to kill somebody if I didn't really mean to do it, right?"

Uh, no
 
2014-06-17 07:42:18 AM
Has the "I was only kidding" defense ever worked?
 
2014-06-17 07:53:59 AM
Yeah, I just LOVE it when someone does that old tried and true comedy routine of setting someone on fire.  Hilarious!
 
2014-06-17 07:58:16 AM
Did he make her wear a funny hat?
Did he stuff hot dogs in her pockets?
Did he have funny music queued up ready to go?

Article lacks details.
 
2014-06-17 08:07:12 AM
i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-06-17 08:32:22 AM
"You can't just leave a kidnapping to shop, this isn't Florida!"
 
2014-06-17 08:32:48 AM

puffy999: [i.imgur.com image 500x708]


I was having a crappy morning until you came along with that...THANK YOU!
 
2014-06-17 08:33:05 AM
flavorwire.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-06-17 09:01:21 AM

FuzedBox: MooseUpNorth: And to the right: a thread full of Farkers, all of whom think they're funnier.

Is that a problem? It's a sick, twisted, farked up world. Some of use would rather tell jokes about it than drink ourselves into a coma.


pbs.twimg.com
 
2014-06-17 09:25:38 AM

macross87: Floridian Trifecta in play....


Florida trifectas complete, on average, about every hour.

/native and proud of the zany
 
2014-06-17 09:34:31 AM
I think this was an old Honeymooners bit.
 
2014-06-17 10:01:31 AM
Conservative humor.
 
2014-06-17 10:10:01 AM
Now he knows how Joan of Arc felt.
 
2014-06-17 10:33:17 AM
Man tells cops he was "only joking" when he doused his wife with gasoline and tried to set her on fire*


*Joke only valid for Indians
 
2014-06-17 10:53:03 AM

Toy Boat: FuzedBox: MooseUpNorth: And to the right: a thread full of Farkers, all of whom think they're funnier.

Is that a problem? It's a sick, twisted, farked up world. Some of use would rather tell jokes about it than drink ourselves into a coma.

[pbs.twimg.com image 515x306]


Some of use would rather tell jokes about it then drink ourselves into a coma.
 
2014-06-17 10:56:46 AM
And now he knows how Joan of Arc felt.
 
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