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(WWL)   35,000 Jehovah's Witnesses walk into a French Quarter Bar   (wwl.com ) divider line
    More: Amusing  
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6241 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jun 2014 at 2:46 PM (1 year ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-06-16 12:52:10 PM  
For all this shiat $cientology and the Mormon church gets, this is possibly a worse cult than both combined.
 
2014-06-16 01:13:43 PM  
Where's a hurricane when you need one?
 
2014-06-16 01:43:07 PM  
If would be a shame if the stadium collapsed and a few thousand people needed blood transfusions or something.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2014-06-16 02:35:41 PM  
How would they fit?  That's like, half the size of a French demi bar.
 
2014-06-16 02:48:07 PM  
You'd think one of them would've side-stepped it.
 
2014-06-16 02:51:28 PM  

nekom: For all this shiat $cientology and the Mormon church gets, this is possibly a worse cult than both combined.


really?
 
2014-06-16 02:51:47 PM  
They do these district meetings all over the country.  They've used the Tacoma Dome in the past, but are off to Husky Stadium this year: schedule

Fark: they go ringing doorbells for a month ahead of time.  I had a paintbrush in my hand and asked if they were there to help?  I should have said that they looked suspicious because the guy and kid both had on a suit and tie ... no one in Seattle does that.  'Cept the Mormon missionaries on bicycles.
 
2014-06-16 02:52:14 PM  
Would they give no French Quarter, or would they turn the other cheek?
 
2014-06-16 02:53:25 PM  
Big request at the Karaoke bars will be "All Along the Watchtower"

just kidding.
This is nothing more than a livestock convention where they get to look over the goods they already bid online for for intra-church breeding of the under aged stock.
and that, I do not kid about.
 
2014-06-16 02:53:27 PM  
Dont they believe like only some 800 of them are going to be saved?
 
2014-06-16 02:54:03 PM  
I had to turn down this security gig.
 
2014-06-16 02:54:24 PM  

Best Princess Celestia: Dont they believe like only some 800 of them are going to be saved?


No.  Not even close.
 
2014-06-16 02:54:36 PM  
so no parties for their kids but the adults get to party like this???
 
2014-06-16 02:54:45 PM  

Best Princess Celestia: Dont they believe like only some 800 of them are going to be saved?


Depends on who has the fish.
 
2014-06-16 02:54:50 PM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: If would be a shame if the stadium collapsed and a few thousand people needed blood transfusions or something.


Then they wouldn't get them. Say what you will about the JW's, they are one of the few religions that actually practice what they preach.
 
2014-06-16 02:56:08 PM  
They fixed the cable?
 
2014-06-16 02:56:21 PM  

nekom: For all this shiat $cientology and the Mormon church gets, this is possibly a worse cult than both combined.


On influence alone, Mormonism gets the prize out of those three.  JW are too small and uninvolved in politics at any level to be detrimental to the country/world as a whole.

Not saying they're not the same level of guano-huffing insanity for the individual member.  Just that they're not "worse".
 
2014-06-16 02:57:12 PM  
Ding dong, shiat happens.

By the way, what did Jehovah witness anyway?
 
2014-06-16 03:01:29 PM  

FatherChaos: Ding dong, shiat happens.

By the way, what did Jehovah witness anyway?


Magic spunk enter Mary's ear thus making babby Jesus
 
2014-06-16 03:01:41 PM  
Wow, that's a quarter of the amount that will get into heaven before it's full!
 
2014-06-16 03:02:53 PM  
You're going to take the most un-fun people on this planet and ship them all to the most fun city in the Western Civilization.

I'd say the odds are pretty high that a few of them are going to end up staying behind.

"Sell my shiat......I'm never coming home."
 
2014-06-16 03:03:20 PM  

nekom: For all this shiat $cientology and the Mormon church gets, this is possibly a worse cult than both combined.


As a child of the cult, I wholeheartedly agree.

i.chzbgr.com
 
2014-06-16 03:03:28 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: FatherChaos: Ding dong, shiat happens.

By the way, what did Jehovah witness anyway?

Magic spunk enter Mary's ear thus making babby Jesus


IT'S A MIRACLE EAR!
 
2014-06-16 03:04:37 PM  
sparlockthewarriorwizard.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-06-16 03:05:04 PM  
They just gridlocked Detroit a week before that. It was shocking to see real traffic around here. New Orleans, though, can probably handle that kind of event.
 
2014-06-16 03:05:10 PM  
grindr must be swamped in New Orleans right now...
 
2014-06-16 03:06:39 PM  
global3.memecdn.com
 
2014-06-16 03:07:15 PM  
Probably make a fortune selling these this week down there.

img.fark.net
 
2014-06-16 03:08:24 PM  
I had two JWs knock on my door this weekend.  It was a pretty low-pressure encounter.  I knew what they were as soon as I opened the door, but before I could say "I'm not interested", they handed me a pamphlet and said goodbye.  I glanced at it, and it was for some meeting in Atlanta, a few hours drive away for me.  Meh.

A relative of mine has a brother who married into the JW scene.  It's a shame- he doesn't participate in any of the family gatherings for holidays.  I've met the guy- he's fairly normal except for the JW stuff.
 
2014-06-16 03:08:35 PM  

nekom: For all this shiat $cientology and the Mormon church gets, this is possibly a worse cult than both combined.


So much this.

I remember about 30 years ago, or so, I was working in a gas station.  There was this one customer who would hand us little pamphlets every time he stopped in to get gas.  To paraphrase what the pamplets said, they were like, "You are SO going to burn in HELL for eternity if you don't follow the way of the Jehova's Witness!!"  We're talking REALLY scary stuff.  In comic book format.  Graphic horror comic format.

If you were one of those people that were on the fence about choosing a religion, you could very easily be frightened into joining these people.

I really do think that those people actually are looking forward to the time they get to die.  Because in their view, this planet, and life itself, simply sucks.
 
2014-06-16 03:09:35 PM  

Primitive Screwhead: nekom: For all this shiat $cientology and the Mormon church gets, this is possibly a worse cult than both combined.

As a child of the cult, I wholeheartedly agree.

[i.chzbgr.com image 500x199]


Neither Scientology nor Jehova's Witnesses have the political clout and power to influence the laws and policies of the United States.

i.huffpost.com
 
2014-06-16 03:10:00 PM  

Khellendros: On influence alone, Mormonism gets the prize out of those three.  JW are too small and uninvolved in politics at any level to be detrimental to the country/world as a whole.

Not saying they're not the same level of guano-huffing insanity for the individual member.  Just that they're not "worse".


JWs are politically neutral.
 
2014-06-16 03:10:38 PM  

FatherChaos: Ding dong, shiat happens.

By the way, what did Jehovah witness anyway?


They know that our energy is coming from the lifeblood of the Earth and is the souls of our ancestors.
 
2014-06-16 03:12:58 PM  

Galileo's Daughter: Khellendros: On influence alone, Mormonism gets the prize out of those three.  JW are too small and uninvolved in politics at any level to be detrimental to the country/world as a whole.

Not saying they're not the same level of guano-huffing insanity for the individual member.  Just that they're not "worse".

JWs are politically neutral.


As I said, they're uninvolved.  As a matter of doctrine.
 
2014-06-16 03:13:22 PM  

Cdr.Murdock: Probably make a fortune selling these this week down there.

[img.fark.net image 560x278]


They're actually arrogant enough to ignore the sign and then argue they are not "soliciting".
You would need to specifically state "No Jehovah's Witnesses" and even then it may not work.
You'd be better off with "Apostate Inside"
 
2014-06-16 03:15:56 PM  
I had a friend who was diagnosed with leukemia and had to go into a hospital. On the surface he seemed to have no interest in religion of any kind, but he at some point converted to JW and refused a blood transfusion that could have saved his life.

Nice guy, but that was a real surprise.

/First open casket funeral I went to since first grade.
 
2014-06-16 03:16:58 PM  

hardinparamedic: Primitive Screwhead: nekom: For all this shiat $cientology and the Mormon church gets, this is possibly a worse cult than both combined.

As a child of the cult, I wholeheartedly agree.

[i.chzbgr.com image 500x199]

Neither Scientology nor Jehova's Witnesses have the political clout and power to influence the laws and policies of the United States.

[i.huffpost.com image 562x449]


Maybe not worse in a political sense but JWs are horrendous on families.
I'd imagine Scientology is too.
At least Mormons (the ones I've met anyway) try not to tear families apart with their beliefs.
 
2014-06-16 03:17:34 PM  

Primitive Screwhead: Cdr.Murdock: Probably make a fortune selling these this week down there.

[img.fark.net image 560x278]

They're actually arrogant enough to ignore the sign and then argue they are not "soliciting".
You would need to specifically state "No Jehovah's Witnesses" and even then it may not work.
You'd be better off with "Apostate Inside"


Technically, they are not soliciting.  What they offer (Bible studies as a general rule) is free of charge.  IIRC, the SCOTUS decided a case related to solicitation and the Witnesses's preaching work in Ohio in 2001-02.
 
2014-06-16 03:17:52 PM  
I had JW's come to the door about a month ago, as soon as I opened it up and saw who they are, I told them that I used to be JW myself, but had been disfellowshipped. They couldn't run away fast enough.
 
2014-06-16 03:18:12 PM  
The hotels must be a living hell with them taking turns knocking on each others door for all hours of the night and day
 
2014-06-16 03:19:06 PM  
I wonder if the convent will display the diversity of the religion or whether it is for the richer white folks who can afford to attend.

In the numerous places I've lived I've only had black JWs ring my doorbell, though Wikipedia says "In the United States, 37% of adults who self-identify as Jehovah's Witnesses are African Americans. This is the highest proportion among the 22 largest religious identifications in the United States." I would guess this is an undercount of blacks thinking race is irrelevant.  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_Jehovah%27s_Witnesses

Strangly in a GIS almost all images of JWs are white. e.g:
media.canada.com
worldcultwatch.org upload.wikimedia.org

And here is a picture at some JW convention:

ex-jw.com
 
2014-06-16 03:19:27 PM  

Solty Dog: Then they wouldn't get them. Say what you will about the JW's, they are one of the few religions that actually practice what they preach.


144,000 of them were assumed bodily into heaven in 1914?
 
2014-06-16 03:20:23 PM  
To some of us Sunday Christians are just as crazy as JWs, Mormons, Baptists, etc.

You're all squatting on our favorite holiday of Saturnalia, so piss off.
 
2014-06-16 03:21:25 PM  
These people don't even celebrate Halloween! I guess they cannot appreciate random people coming up to their doors.
 
2014-06-16 03:21:52 PM  

Galileo's Daughter: Technically, they are not soliciting.  What they offer (Bible studies as a general rule) is free of charge.  IIRC, the SCOTUS decided a case related to solicitation and the Witnesses's preaching work in Ohio in 2001-02.


I am completely aware of what they offer and they would be the best kind of correct and protected but in the overall scheme, it's soliciting.
Things have also changed quite a bit from when I was being dragged around the neighborhood in the 80's.
They were charging for their brainwashing materials then.
 
2014-06-16 03:24:17 PM  
jehovaswitnessbeatenondoorstep.jpg
 
2014-06-16 03:24:40 PM  
They'll spend the whole time locked in the con hall, preserving their moral purity against the evils of New Orleans. Playing their sexy demon worshipping games:
www.legendra.com
Remember kids, Christmas presents are devil worship.
 
2014-06-16 03:24:47 PM  
bitsandpieces.us
 
2014-06-16 03:25:18 PM  

FatherChaos: Ding dong, shiat happens.

By the way, what did Jehovah witness anyway?


I always wondered about this. They must have something pretty bad on Him to act the way they do and not get smitted (or is it smitten? smote?).
 
2014-06-16 03:27:04 PM  

nekom: For all this shiat $cientology and the Mormon church gets, this is possibly a worse cult than both combined.


citation?
 
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