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(Mirror.co.uk)   "If homeowners discover a bee or wasp nest in their house, we would urge them to get it inspected and removed by a professional. Starting fires is not an effective way to clear these nests and we would encourage people not to do this"   (mirror.co.uk) divider line 47
    More: Dumbass, nests, station commander  
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2680 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jun 2014 at 9:06 PM (11 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



47 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-06-14 08:34:05 PM
However, if they must, we encourage them to record their attempt for posterity.
 
2014-06-14 09:08:14 PM
I, on the other hand, strongly encourage it
 
2014-06-14 09:11:05 PM
I am somewhat embarrassed to admit I've done this.
 
2014-06-14 09:12:05 PM
 
2014-06-14 09:12:06 PM
Fire? Woman, you're to blame.
 
2014-06-14 09:15:51 PM

Katerchen: /oblig

http://www.somethingawful.com/comedy-goldmine/bees/1/


Came here for the bee inferno, leaving happy.
img.fark.net
 
2014-06-14 09:16:12 PM
If you are in NJ or NYC, call "Oh Honey" to get the bees removed.  Fair price, humanely done.  The bees get a new home and you get rid of the problem.
 
2014-06-14 09:20:44 PM
"Starting fires is not an effective way to clear these nests ..."

Quite the contrary, this is a quick and VERY effective way to clear these nests. The problem is that it tends to have unwanted side effects.
 
2014-06-14 09:21:04 PM
How is it not effective? If you burn your house to the ground I guarantee you won't have a bee problem anymore.
 
2014-06-14 09:28:52 PM
www.tfw2005.com
 
2014-06-14 09:31:39 PM
Nuke from orbit.

Only way to be sure.
 
2014-06-14 09:33:11 PM
My home inspector did that in the house I was looking to purchase.  Bees in the chimney?  Well, lets test the fireplace.

Nothing happened though, except toasty bees.

Maybe it was more a case of needing the chimney cleaned than anything about the bees?
 
2014-06-14 09:34:57 PM
Because England.
 
2014-06-14 09:35:37 PM
Beezooka
 
2014-06-14 09:38:51 PM
What?   Inside the dwelling maybe not a good idea.  But ANYWHERE you don't sleep, and I mean You and only you, kill those motherfarkers with fire.
 
2014-06-14 09:39:15 PM
So now it's not recommended to start fires in a fireplace?

My wasps are always under the eaves, I enjoy killing the bastards  with that can that shoots the poison about half a mile.
 
2014-06-14 09:49:00 PM
Well he is right.  The particle beam from command and conquer should be used instead.
 
2014-06-14 09:53:10 PM
Bees are very important critters.  I don't think they should ever be killed, and certainly not by fire.  Instead, their hives should be relocated by a professional.
 
2014-06-14 10:01:36 PM

www.teamvalkyrieftw.com



/o-bee-ligatory
 
2014-06-14 10:05:00 PM
I cleared a wasp nest 3 days ago so I'm getting a kick...

There's a cavity above the window of my living room. Whoever though it was a good idea to have this empty space there should die a stingy death. Anyway, I noticed strange noises from there two weeks ago and I thought it was termites or cockroaches. Last weekend I looked at it from the outside and saw wasps flying in and out from a crack. Bought wasp killer spray, treated the crack (I couldn't even blow it inside the crack, just on the outer surface), and they were gone the next day. Cheap, easy, and safe.
 
2014-06-14 10:11:31 PM
Well,Don't forget to harvest the hornet honey.
 
2014-06-14 10:17:49 PM

Sir_Spanksalot: Well,Don't forget to harvest the hornet honey.


I'm not harvesting any hornet. And don't call me honey.
 
2014-06-14 10:22:40 PM

traylor: I cleared a wasp nest 3 days ago so I'm getting a kick...

There's a cavity above the window of my living room. Whoever though it was a good idea to have this empty space there should die a stingy death. Anyway, I noticed strange noises from there two weeks ago and I thought it was termites or cockroaches. Last weekend I looked at it from the outside and saw wasps flying in and out from a crack. Bought wasp killer spray, treated the crack (I couldn't even blow it inside the crack, just on the outer surface), and they were gone the next day. Cheap, easy, and safe.


And boring. Very boring. Next time try some fire.
 
2014-06-14 10:25:54 PM
Fire is only the proper solution for spiders.
 
2014-06-14 10:32:27 PM

CruJones: So now it's not recommended to start fires in a fireplace?

My wasps are always under the eaves, I enjoy killing the bastards  with that can that shoots the poison about half a mile.


A can in each hand, shoot the farkers right out of the air, I pretend I'm a WWII AA gunner on a ship :)
 
2014-06-14 10:36:11 PM
They make some really nice chemicals these days with cans that spray good streams 12 feet away.  And it's stuff that needs very little contact and they start going into spasms and falling to the ground and you can really soak a whole freaking nest in just seconds and they are suddenly all writhing in some twisted, synchronized dance of pain and agony like a ritualistic cyanide drinking suicide pact social gathering.

/i don't like them
 
2014-06-14 10:40:05 PM

Jument: traylor: I cleared a wasp nest 3 days ago so I'm getting a kick...

There's a cavity above the window of my living room. Whoever though it was a good idea to have this empty space there should die a stingy death. Anyway, I noticed strange noises from there two weeks ago and I thought it was termites or cockroaches. Last weekend I looked at it from the outside and saw wasps flying in and out from a crack. Bought wasp killer spray, treated the crack (I couldn't even blow it inside the crack, just on the outer surface), and they were gone the next day. Cheap, easy, and safe.

And boring. Very boring. Next time try some fire.


Fire was next on my list. Let's see if they come back - whatever, I'm only renting this apartment.
 
2014-06-14 10:44:23 PM

trappedspirit: They make some really nice chemicals these days with cans that spray good streams 12 feet away.  And it's stuff that needs very little contact and they start going into spasms and falling to the ground and you can really soak a whole freaking nest in just seconds and they are suddenly all writhing in some twisted, synchronized dance of pain and agony like a ritualistic cyanide drinking suicide pact social gathering.

/i don't like them


is it called Jim Jones Wasp Spray?
 
2014-06-14 10:55:03 PM
img.fark.net        img.fark.net img.fark.net


img.fark.netimg.fark.net
 
2014-06-14 10:55:17 PM
The fark?

They make spray so specifically for exactly this that you can buy different varieties targeted to specific wasp species if you want.  It's so common that there's literally a wal-mart generic brand of the shiat.

... who the hell decides that starting a fire is a better option?  Because I don't buy that anyone doesn't  know that bug spray is a thing.
 
2014-06-14 10:57:01 PM
People should realize that break fluid is just as effective at killing wasps and bees as starting fluid without being quite as combustible.
 
2014-06-14 11:04:50 PM

Jim_Callahan: The fark?

They make spray so specifically for exactly this that you can buy different varieties targeted to specific wasp species if you want.  It's so common that there's literally a wal-mart generic brand of the shiat.

... who the hell decides that starting a fire is a better option?  Because I don't buy that anyone doesn't  know that bug spray is a thing.




Fires are more fun. This is how I do it:
images.sodahead.com
 
2014-06-14 11:05:08 PM
People should realize that break fluid is just as effective at killing wasps and bees as starting fluid without being quite as combustible.

Yeah, I use that stuff for break dancing.

/Fireworks FTW.
 
2014-06-14 11:13:36 PM
Beeswax is, of course, the original flammable standard
 
2014-06-14 11:39:45 PM
The best thing about that article is the quote is from station commander Dick Dykes
 
2014-06-14 11:40:05 PM

FizixJunkee: Bees are very important critters.  I don't think they should ever be killed, and certainly not by fire.  Instead, their hives should be relocated by a professional.


I remember reading recently that because there are so many wild africanized bees making nests they usually just destroy them. Bee keepers would have to remove and relocate the hive (VERY tough with africanized bees since they go berzerk), then find and kill the queen and replace the queen with a newly bred (normal) queen for the hive. Takes too long and is too risky.

Wasps on the other hand are a biological conundrum. If it were NOT for human windows, eaves, carports etc wasps would go extinct - they are biologically programmed to make nests in human dwellings ignoring all the trees, bushes, forests etc now. Once went hiking in the Ozarks -- trees, rocks valleys and cliffs for 10 miles in every direction. Where was the wasp nest? On the trailhead sign midway through the hike.
 
2014-06-15 12:14:01 AM
www.geeky-gadgets.com
But if you do decide to use fire...(pic is link)
 
2014-06-15 12:15:18 AM
 
2014-06-15 12:46:34 AM

trappedspirit: They make some really nice chemicals these days with cans that spray good streams 12 feet away.  And it's stuff that needs very little contact and they start going into spasms and falling to the ground and you can really soak a whole freaking nest in just seconds and they are suddenly all writhing in some twisted, synchronized dance of pain and agony like a ritualistic cyanide drinking suicide pact social gathering.

/i don't like them


Kids pointed out that some paper wasps set up shop in the back of the house, a few years back.  Only had a can of Raid Ant and Roach spray, so I used that.  No problemo!  You could hear the wasp bodies hitting the concrete.  A satisfying sound, indeed.
 
2014-06-15 12:51:30 AM
It is absolutely the most effective solution.

And the most final solution. Not only will it solve your bee problem, it will ensure the bees never ever nest in that house again.
 
2014-06-15 01:11:23 AM

Nix Nightbird: trappedspirit: They make some really nice chemicals these days with cans that spray good streams 12 feet away.  And it's stuff that needs very little contact and they start going into spasms and falling to the ground and you can really soak a whole freaking nest in just seconds and they are suddenly all writhing in some twisted, synchronized dance of pain and agony like a ritualistic cyanide drinking suicide pact social gathering.

/i don't like them

is it called Jim Jones Wasp Spray?


Sacrificial Senator not included.
 
2014-06-15 01:30:03 AM
Might be the most obvious attempt to cover up not having a photo I've yet to see.

i3.mirror.co.uk
 
2014-06-15 09:49:27 AM

Jim_Callahan: The fark?

They make spray so specifically for exactly this that you can buy different varieties targeted to specific wasp species if you want.  It's so common that there's literally a wal-mart generic brand of the shiat.

... who the hell decides that starting a fire is a better option?  Because I don't buy that anyone doesn't  know that bug spray is a thing.


Right, who would ever put a fire in their fireplace?  Far better to spray flammable chemicals up the chimney.

Actually....  I kind of wonder if they DID try that first, and that's why the fire went so bad.
 
2014-06-15 11:36:06 AM
This is my cousins in a nutshell. A neighbor had a HUGE hornets nest growing in their tree. Cousins(plural) brilliant idea was a 7 foot metal pole with rags dipped in diesel tied to one end, then wait til night and light those biatches up. It looked like the great Chicago fire when that tree went up that night. Plus note, it did kill the hornets.
 
2014-06-15 12:22:08 PM
There is one corner of the eves of my house that always gets a wasp nest. Best part is there is a table on my porch about 15 yards away that makes a perfect bench rest. So the son and I take turns shooting them with a very accurate pellet gun. When targets of opportunity stop making themselves available we spray the nest to get the smart/lucky ones then knock it down and burn it. 3-4 weeks later a new nest goes up and the process starts over

Do the same for carpenter bees.
 
2014-06-15 01:14:05 PM

i.r.id10t: There is one corner of the eves of my house that always gets a wasp nest. Best part is there is a table on my porch about 15 yards away that makes a perfect bench rest. So the son and I take turns shooting them with a very accurate pellet gun. When targets of opportunity stop making themselves available we spray the nest to get the smart/lucky ones then knock it down and burn it. 3-4 weeks later a new nest goes up and the process starts over

Do the same for carpenter bees.


Thanks for the inspiration, I now have my afternoon's entertainment.
 
2014-06-15 03:34:12 PM
I have a super easy, effective, and environmentally friendly way to remove wasps.

Soapy water + super soaker = dead wasps

Not only that, they will never rebuild their nests on soap scum.

I have tried this with Ultra Dawn as well as Doctor Bronner's, both work very well.

Anyway, first get the wasps covered so they fly away from you and die, then get a good bunch of suds all over the wasp nest, and you are done.
 
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