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(Strategy Page)   What if Wonkette had covered D-Day   (strategypage.com ) divider line
    More: Amusing  
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2481 clicks; posted to Politics » on 09 Jun 2014 at 11:06 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



59 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2014-06-09 10:34:08 AM  
HAHAHAHAHAAA!!! Fecking troll.
 
2014-06-09 10:37:27 AM  
That was unreadable and nonsensical.
 
2014-06-09 10:42:53 AM  
There's this conservative meme that in ye olden days everyone loved all the wars. That's the joke.
 
2014-06-09 11:03:29 AM  
If D-Day were reported on today, as if it happened yesterday.... we'd get gore filled reports with accurate descriptions of troop movements?

Yeah..... I don't think so....
 
2014-06-09 11:04:24 AM  

kxs401: That was unreadable and nonsensical.


And smacks of "durr durr liberal media"
 
2014-06-09 11:06:57 AM  
Weird to green this one first. Doesn't make sense at all and it makes the other one look like a reaction.
 
2014-06-09 11:11:09 AM  
D-Day is just an Obama distraction from BENGHAZI.
 
2014-06-09 11:11:42 AM  
I enjoy parody, and I enjoy mocking, but this was disappointing. It's like one of those godawful lame things your Facebook uncle keeps sharing, and you keep ignoring.
 
2014-06-09 11:13:09 AM  

JerseyTim: Weird to green this one first. Doesn't make sense at all and it makes the other one look like a reaction.


Kinda ruins the joke, doesn't it? Admin fail.
 
2014-06-09 11:16:34 AM  

DrBenway: JerseyTim: Weird to green this one first. Doesn't make sense at all and it makes the other one look like a reaction.

Kinda ruins the joke, doesn't it? Admin fail.


Yeah..... Sheesh.
 
2014-06-09 11:17:08 AM  

Rapmaster2000: There's this conservative meme that in ye olden days everyone loved all the wars. That's the joke.


Conservatives tended to be isolationist in those days.
 
2014-06-09 11:17:37 AM  
Utterly inscrutable in several ways.
 
2014-06-09 11:18:18 AM  
Allies make it off the beachhead as they make the Germans check their pillbox privilege
 
2014-06-09 11:18:55 AM  
Fox News: US troops storming beaches under withering fire from the shore. Running into death. Kamighazi!
 
2014-06-09 11:19:44 AM  

Rapmaster2000: There's this conservative meme that in ye olden days everyone loved all the wars. That's the joke.


I remember when this was floating around during our invasion of Iraq. At least conservatives are learning to recycle.
 
2014-06-09 11:19:59 AM  
I didn't know Satire came humor free now.
 
2014-06-09 11:21:11 AM  
We have a pretty good idea of how Fox News would have covered D-Day:

i.ebayimg.com
 
2014-06-09 11:21:50 AM  

Rapmaster2000: There's this conservative meme that in ye olden days everyone loved all the wars. That's the joke.


meme is not a synonym for trope
 
2014-06-09 11:27:39 AM  

Yakk: I didn't know Satire came humor free now.


Satire doesn't need to be humorous.

I'm satirical all the time without being humorous.  Sure, some people, and some mods, might call it "trolling," but they just don't understand satire.
 
2014-06-09 11:28:58 AM  

Donnchadha: If D-Day... happened yesterday


www.truthdig.com
encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com
www.rawstory.com
www.longitude361.com
 
2014-06-09 11:29:49 AM  

sendtodave: Satire doesn't need to be humorous.


And oral sex doesn't have to be stimulating.
 
2014-06-09 11:30:42 AM  
HAHAHA THAT WAS SO AMUSING
 
2014-06-09 11:32:56 AM  

MFAWG: Conservatives tended to be isolationist Nazis in those days.


/also works
 
2014-06-09 11:34:32 AM  

Rapmaster2000: There's this conservative meme that in ye olden days everyone loved all the wars. That's the joke.


www.angelfire.lycos.com

"Men, all this stuff you've heard about America not wanting to fight, wanting to stay out of the war, is a lot of horse dung. Americans, traditionally, love to fight. All real Americans love the sting of battle... Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser. Americans play to win all the time. I wouldn't give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That's why Americans have never lost and will never lose a war, because the very thought of losing is hateful to Americans."

// "Now, an army is a team. It lives, eats, sleeps, fights as a team. This individuality stuff is a bunch of crap. The bilious bastards who wrote that stuff about individuality for the Saturday Evening Post Wonkette don't know anything more about real battle than they do about fornicating."
 
2014-06-09 11:35:39 AM  
uh...apparently one of the major reasons why American troops were bogged down on the beaches particularly Omaha was

upload.wikimedia.org

the floating DD Sherman tanks were launched too far out to sea--in 6 foot waves instead of the 1 foot waves they were designed to withstand.  Most of the initial waves sank, leaving the early waves of infantry on the beaches with no armored support. Additionally, those tanks that did reach the shores got lost due to smoke screens and couldn't support the troops where they were supposed to.
 
2014-06-09 11:37:33 AM  

Donnchadha: If D-Day were reported on today, as if it happened yesterday.... we'd get gore filled reports with accurate descriptions of troop movements?


Come on, no one would care about global warming while we were storming the beach.
 
2014-06-09 11:40:23 AM  
Foxnews would have been praising Hitler for his strong moral stand and his emphasis on law and order.
 
2014-06-09 11:41:55 AM  

The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves: Foxnews would have been praising Hitler for his strong moral stand and his emphasis on law and order.

being white.
 
2014-06-09 11:43:31 AM  

Jiro Dreams Of McRibs: uh...apparently one of the major reasons why American troops were bogged down on the beaches particularly Omaha was

the floating DD Sherman tanks were launched too far out to sea--in 6 foot waves instead of the 1 foot waves they were designed to withstand.  Most of the initial waves sank, leaving the early waves of infantry on the beaches with no armored support. Additionally, those tanks that did reach the shores got lost due to smoke screens and couldn't support the troops where they were supposed to.


Underwater archaeology has also found most of the hulls settled to the bottom at very steep angles relative to the beach. We're pretty sure they were given landmarks to move towards, and when the current pulled them laterally the tank crews kept maneuvering them to head towards their landmarks, and when the tanks got almost sideways it was easy for the channel currents to swamp them.
 
2014-06-09 11:48:27 AM  
I'd storm Wonkette's beaches.

/she's hot
 
2014-06-09 11:54:28 AM  
Headline would read "Obama Weak on Foreign Policy"
 
2014-06-09 11:55:47 AM  
Floating Sherman tanks.
Right.
I have a gun sight from a Sherman tank in my living room (I use it to watch deer out back) and that thing alone is a farking anchor. Probably the lightest thing on one of those tanks.
 
2014-06-09 11:56:44 AM  
Um... during the D-Day operation the war in Europe was still not entirely popular, support was somewhat grudging at best, with a lot of people still thinking that we were kind of wasting time on someone that wasn't the 'real enemy' (that being the Japanese, who'd actually attacked us) and not terribly excited about allying with the Communists in Russia either.

Until it was pretty unambiguous that we'd successfully established a launch-point for invasion that's pretty much how it'd have been reported  then.
 
2014-06-09 11:57:10 AM  
First: Wonkette? shiat hasn't been relevant since the Bush presidency. ever.

Second, I'm pretty sure that since FDR was a Demoncrat, Fox News would've been all over the disastrous invasion (from the safety of their New York offices)..
 
2014-06-09 11:57:18 AM  
The point of this alleged satire seems to be the old Republican line we heard endlessly during Bush's presidency; "Traitorous liberal scum don't support the PRESIDENT in a time of WAR!!!". It's kinda odd to see it now when virtually every military decision Obama makes is claimed to be grounds for impeachment by right-wingers.

Not to mention, FDR was a democrat and endured his fair share of criticism from the right, who were against entering the war in the first place.
 
2014-06-09 12:00:43 PM  

RsquaredW: First: Wonkette? shiat hasn't been relevant since the Bush presidency. ever.

Second, I'm pretty sure that since FDR was a Demoncrat, Fox News would've been all over the disastrous invasion (from the safety of their New York offices)..


yeah but don't you get it? liberals are bad

QED libtardatron 40k
 
2014-06-09 12:04:28 PM  

MBrady: The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves: Foxnews would have been praising Hitler for his strong moral stand and his emphasis on law and order.

and CNN and MSNBC would have been criticizing why we needed to invade anyway

"just leave them be - they aren't hurting anyone"


LOLWUT?
 
2014-06-09 12:04:47 PM  
Wall of text is not in the Wonkette style.
 
2014-06-09 12:06:30 PM  
Here is the real article by Wonkette.... What if Fox News had covered D-day

Your welcome.
 
2014-06-09 12:08:21 PM  
And yes, I posted it, and it was not greenlit....
 
2014-06-09 12:13:01 PM  

justanothersumguy: Here is the real article by Wonkette.... What if Fox News had covered D-day

Your welcome.


That's far better satire. What the hell is the crap linked that started this thread?
 
2014-06-09 12:13:13 PM  

Snarfangel: Donnchadha: If D-Day were reported on today, as if it happened yesterday.... we'd get gore filled reports with accurate descriptions of troop movements?

Come on, no one would care about global warming while we were storming the beach.


Hey, we're being Super Cereal about this.
 
2014-06-09 12:17:07 PM  
whaaaa we can't use poor and middle class people as cannon fodder without the media getting all high and mighty about it and reporting the losses.
 
2014-06-09 12:19:12 PM  

StopLurkListen: justanothersumguy: Here is the real article by Wonkette.... What if Fox News had covered D-day

Your welcome.

That's far better satire. What the hell is the crap linked that started this thread?


In the sense that a crampy, gassy, watery diarrhea is better than a 5-alarm habanero hole-immolator.

Both are obvious and devoid of anything resembling "a point" (well, a point beyond "Lookit! Ain't they but DUMB?!").
 
2014-06-09 12:22:05 PM  

MBrady: The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves: Foxnews would have been praising Hitler for his strong moral stand and his emphasis on law and order.

and CNN and MSNBC would have been criticizing why we needed to invade anyway

"just leave them be - they aren't hurting anyone"


Bullshiat.

There were planes that crashed in the Channel. CNN would have been beside itself.

/And MSNBC would have spent weeks asking Christie why Mulberry Harbor was backed up.
 
2014-06-09 12:37:44 PM  

Dr Dreidel: StopLurkListen: justanothersumguy: Here is the real article by Wonkette.... What if Fox News had covered D-day

Your welcome.

That's far better satire. What the hell is the crap linked that started this thread?

In the sense that a crampy, gassy, watery diarrhea is better than a 5-alarm habanero hole-immolator.

Both are obvious and devoid of anything resembling "a point" (well, a point beyond "Lookit! Ain't they but DUMB?!").


Sure, they're both bad satire, but the Wonkette one is at least coherent - it's making fun of Fox by taking the way they treat current news, by interpreting the events of D-Day through that lens (admittedly fairly badly, but you can tell what they were going for).

The first is just... odd. You could re-title it "Fox news covers D-Day!" and it'd be just as apt. I have no idea what point it is trying to make.
 
2014-06-09 12:38:45 PM  
I was hoping for one of those "The Allies have landed in France, and you won't believe what happened next!" kind of things....
 
2014-06-09 01:01:14 PM  
came for that picture
leaving disappointed.
 
2014-06-09 01:12:42 PM  
My favorite line from the Real Wonkette story about Fox news....  The last sentence...
"Meanwhile, CNN covered the invasion with a brief 5-minute story and then returned to its ongoing coverage of the search for Amelia Earhart."
I snarked.
 
2014-06-09 01:16:36 PM  
Thanks, Nosevelt..

Look at him sitting in that wheelchair like he owns the place.
 
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