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(SeattlePI)   Miss Nevada Nia Sanchez crowned as 63rd Miss USA, and yes, she is like, totally hot   (seattlepi.com) divider line 93
    More: Cool, Miss USA, Miss Nevada, Rumer Willis, Giuliana Rancic, musical ensemble, Ian Ziering, Lance Bass, Miss Universe Organization  
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17338 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Jun 2014 at 2:22 AM (45 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



93 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2014-06-09 01:25:39 AM  
Goosebumps every time.  It I bet she would live off silkworm cocoons and old copies of Readers Digest just to make Nepalese kids feel better about having picked flowers their neighbor was going to dry.  It could happen.
 
2014-06-09 02:26:05 AM  

staplermofo: Goosebumps every time.  It I bet she would live off silkworm cocoons and old copies of Readers Digest just to make Nepalese kids feel better about having picked flowers their neighbor was going to dry.  It could happen.


Dude, stop using voice to text while you're jacking off.
 
2014-06-09 02:29:02 AM  

Mentalpatient87: Dude, stop using voice to text while you're jacking off.


I'm like farking Kurtz from Heart of Darkness, or the Bene Gesserit from Dune.  I can't.  Not in good conscience.  There have to be constant comparisons for posterity.
Also, I bet her tonsils are gross.
 
2014-06-09 02:30:41 AM  

staplermofo: Goosebumps every time.  It I bet she would live off silkworm cocoons and old copies of Readers Digest just to make Nepalese kids feel better about having picked flowers their neighbor was going to dry.  It could happen.


What the fark did I just read?
 
2014-06-09 02:32:02 AM  
I'd pee in her butt butt, but eh I've farked better.
 
2014-06-09 02:32:08 AM  
Um.... it's like the 21st Century?

Shouldn't we be phasing out stupid sexist cultural phenomena like beauty pageants by now?

And if not now, when?
 
2014-06-09 02:32:14 AM  
she plans to take her passion and knowledge for martial arts to the masses as Miss USA

*Beavis voice*

COOL! A hot chick kicking ASS!
 
2014-06-09 02:33:15 AM  

Mentalpatient87: staplermofo: Goosebumps every time.  It I bet she would live off silkworm cocoons and old copies of Readers Digest just to make Nepalese kids feel better about having picked flowers their neighbor was going to dry.  It could happen.

Dude, stop using voice to text while you're jacking off.


I think I've witnessed the birth of a new Fark classic here.
 
2014-06-09 02:36:23 AM  
I guessssss she's hot in a plastic neurotic sex doll kind of way?

l3.yimg.com
 
2014-06-09 02:37:13 AM  
Something something something Dirty Sanchez
 
2014-06-09 02:38:21 AM  

whidbey: Um.... it's like the 21st Century?

Shouldn't we be phasing out stupid sexist cultural phenomena like beauty pageants by now?

And if not now, when?


We need something like The Voice but for smart people. Hide them and disguise the voice. Just judge based on beliefs and smarts. Could call it The Brain.

Then at the end the winner is revealed.. and the show promptly loses all viewership.
 
2014-06-09 02:39:48 AM  
What's up with her sharp elbows?
 
2014-06-09 02:47:39 AM  
I think she's gross.  Maybe it's my lack of sleep talking but she kind of scares me.  Something something marmalade skies...
 
2014-06-09 02:48:52 AM  

oldtaku: I guessssss she's hot in a plastic neurotic sex doll kind of way?


Yeah, she's gorgeous. But, there's this weird quality about all these pageant queens that makes them look like a well animated mannequin. It's like those indoor rock climbing places. Sure, the wall is perfect for climbing, but it just doesn't look like a real cliff. It's all "too perfect."

/what the fark am I talking about, here?
//I just don't have the words
 
2014-06-09 02:49:31 AM  
Not bad,  definitely better than the plastic blonds that usually win.
 
2014-06-09 02:49:48 AM  

oldtaku: I guessssss she's hot in a plastic neurotic sex doll kind of way?


I was going to say that maybe it's a bad photo, but the one in the swimsuit has the same look.
 
2014-06-09 02:51:51 AM  

whidbey: Um.... it's like the 21st Century?

Shouldn't we be phasing out stupid sexist cultural phenomena like beauty pageants by now?

And if not now, when?


OR phasing in a male version for equality.

/worst beauty pageant ever.
 
2014-06-09 02:53:31 AM  

Mentalpatient87: /what the fark am I talking about, here?
//I just don't have the words


You mean to say that they conform to a type more than to a pure pursuit of beauty.  The best looking people are pretty varied, these women all come from the same idea of beauty.  Angelina Jolie, Sophia Vergara and them aren't going to win this contest.  They will always be better looking.  It stopped being a pursuit of beauty and became a contest of who can score highest on these traits without looking disturbing.  It's the same approach that brings you McDonald's burgers.
 
2014-06-09 02:55:27 AM  
Hmmm..... women's responsibility to not be raped? Nice answer. Sure, I am paraphrasing.
 
2014-06-09 02:56:45 AM  

staplermofo: Mentalpatient87: /what the fark am I talking about, here?
//I just don't have the words

You mean to say that they conform to a type more than to a pure pursuit of beauty.  The best looking people are pretty varied, these women all come from the same idea of beauty.  Angelina Jolie, Sophia Vergara and them aren't going to win this contest.  They will always be better looking.  It stopped being a pursuit of beauty and became a contest of who can score highest on these traits without looking disturbing.  It's the same approach that brings you McDonald's burgers.


Ooh! So it's a human version of a dog show, right? They give a fark if it's a good dog, just as long as it checks off the boxes.
 
2014-06-09 02:59:16 AM  

Mentalpatient87: Ooh! So it's a human version of a dog show, right? They give a fark if it's a good dog, just as long as it checks off the boxes.


Yes.  Also, I would inbreed her so hard she'd make the Hapsburgs look like Alan Ivers.
 
2014-06-09 02:59:39 AM  

whidbey: Um.... it's like the 21st Century?

Shouldn't we be phasing out stupid sexist cultural phenomena like beauty pageants by now?

And if not now, when?


**********
My peener says sexist is just fine. Of course, if they decided the winner in a naked free-for-all gun battle that would be even cooler.
 
2014-06-09 03:02:00 AM  
Mexicans taking all our pageant jerbs.
 
2014-06-09 03:06:50 AM  
"Sexist"?  Where's that Spinal Tap photo?
 
2014-06-09 03:09:30 AM  

Harry_Seldon: Mexicans taking all our pageant jerbs.


Mexican?  She's 50% German.  Why would you call her Mexican?  Why not call her a Kraut?  Don't commit your hate crimes here.
 
2014-06-09 03:11:57 AM  

staplermofo: Goosebumps every time.  It I bet she would live off silkworm cocoons and old copies of Readers Digest just to make Nepalese kids feel better about having picked flowers their neighbor was going to dry.  It could happen.


I want acid too!
 
2014-06-09 03:12:02 AM  

reaperducer: Harry_Seldon: Mexicans taking all our pageant jerbs.

Mexican?  She's 50% German.  Why would you call her Mexican?  Why not call her a Kraut?  Don't commit your hate crimes here.


Krautexican?
 
2014-06-09 03:13:41 AM  

ambercricket: Krautexican?


Jerry, but pronounced yehri.
 
2014-06-09 03:14:59 AM  

whidbey: Um.... it's like the 21st Century?

Shouldn't we be phasing out stupid sexist cultural phenomena like beauty pageants by now?

And if not now, when?


It's a production put on by Donald Trump. We're stuck with this crap until the incubator for that animal on his head dies.

By the way: Miss Louisiana should have won, and Miss Georgia looked like a foot.
 
2014-06-09 03:15:39 AM  
She could do with a bit more up top, but yeah, pretty smoking hot.

Even on Fark, it's pretty safe to trust Subby when the link is a Miss USA contest.
 
2014-06-09 03:22:30 AM  

whidbey: Um.... it's like the 21st Century?

Shouldn't we be phasing out stupid sexist cultural phenomena like beauty pageants by now?

And if not now, when?


static.wix.com
 
2014-06-09 03:23:03 AM  
Those swimsuits are f*cking hideous. Like Bill Cosby vomited onto a 1987 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition.
 
2014-06-09 03:23:45 AM  
Sun dried leather hot?
 
2014-06-09 03:27:25 AM  

ambercricket: reaperducer: Harry_Seldon: Mexicans taking all our pageant jerbs.

Mexican?  She's 50% German.  Why would you call her Mexican?  Why not call her a Kraut?  Don't commit your hate crimes here.

Krautexican?


Oh god, I just imagined sauerkraut on a taco and almost puked..
 
2014-06-09 03:29:44 AM  
I like how you farkers are like "do not want". Pretty sure they only thing you guys bang is your left hand, Dr. Ann Palmer.

This isn't a bang contest. It's a beauty pageant dumbfarks. Get over thinking you even have a chance to be in bed.. let alone the same room as these Miss USA contestants.
 
2014-06-09 03:32:11 AM  

Launchpad1986: I like how you farkers are like "do not want". Pretty sure they only thing you guys bang is your left hand, Dr. Ann Palmer.

This isn't a bang contest. It's a beauty pageant dumbfarks. Get over thinking you even have a chance to be in bed.. let alone the same room as these Miss USA contestants.


Hey, it's Miss USA.  America is the land of dreams.  I can get her self esteem so low, and her judgement so impaired with drugs she'll bang me a week and a half before killing herself.  I AM ALLOWED TO DREAM.  8th amendment rights, jackass.
 
2014-06-09 03:40:57 AM  

Launchpad1986: I like how you farkers are like "do not want". Pretty sure they only thing you guys bang is your left hand, Dr. Ann Palmer.

This isn't a bang contest. It's a beauty pageant dumbfarks. Get over thinking you even have a chance to be in bed.. let alone the same room as these Miss USA contestants.


You're missing the point, Sir Valiant.
 
2014-06-09 03:55:38 AM  

whidbey: Um.... it's like the 21st Century?

Shouldn't we be phasing out stupid sexist cultural phenomena like beauty pageants by now?

And if not now, when?


When women enjoy ogling hot men as much as we enjoy ogling hot women?
 
2014-06-09 03:56:49 AM  

Launchpad1986: I like how you farkers are like "do not want". Pretty sure they only thing you guys bang is your left hand, Dr. Ann Palmer.

This isn't a bang contest. It's a beauty pageant dumbfarks. Get over thinking you even have a chance to be in bed.. let alone the same room as these Miss USA contestants.


i0.kym-cdn.com
 
2014-06-09 03:57:08 AM  

reaperducer: Harry_Seldon: Mexicans taking all our pageant jerbs.

Mexican?  She's 50% German.  Why would you call her Mexican?  Why not call her a Kraut?  Don't commit your hate crimes here.


She needs to be Mexican first...have to pick the cabbage before making the Kraut.
 
2014-06-09 04:03:22 AM  
They come in the night to take our women for sale in Berlin?
/Germans in Mexico
//Germans in Mexico-oh
 
2014-06-09 04:04:41 AM  
Yeah, I don't mean to get studman69 or anything but pageant girls never really did it for me. To manicured and "perfect", like they took a checklist of attractive features in a 40 year old woman and pasted them onto a 20 year old girl's body. If she still looks like that in 20 years then I could call her hot but at her age I would prefer someone with a little more roundness in her curves, less tanning, and less clown makeup. Maybe they look like that is what the judges (donald trump types) find attractive, same how most runway models look androgynous because that is what the (gay) designers find attractive.
 
2014-06-09 04:37:17 AM  

whidbey: Um.... it's like the 21st Century?

Shouldn't we be phasing out stupid sexist cultural phenomena like beauty pageants by now?

And if not now, when?


I honestly couldn't agree more - but I do like looking at pretty girls enough to click on a link, but not enough to watch the dumb pageants (we have internet porn now and all).

And she is very pretty...... in that "looks like she's aging WAY too goddamn fast so schtup her before she turns in to a monster 10 years from now" way.
 
2014-06-09 04:52:32 AM  

Fat Man Of La Mancha: Yeah, I don't mean to get studman69 or anything but pageant girls never really did it for me. To manicured and "perfect", like they took a checklist of attractive features in a 40 year old woman and pasted them onto a 20 year old girl's body. If she still looks like that in 20 years then I could call her hot but at her age I would prefer someone with a little more roundness in her curves, less tanning, and less clown makeup. Maybe they look like that is what the judges (donald trump types) find attractive, same how most runway models look androgynous because that is what the (gay) designers find attractive.


win^^
 
2014-06-09 04:55:19 AM  
Yes, she's gorgeous.. though checking the pics of the others, every last one of them is gorgeous.  I'd make a terrible judge for this sort of thing.
 
2014-06-09 05:07:49 AM  
Miss Rhode Island... 5'11 of all this:

content.missuniverse.com

And this:

beautypageantnews.com
 
2014-06-09 05:27:04 AM  
I liked Iowa and Montana
 
2014-06-09 05:32:32 AM  
4th degree black belt at age 24?

That doesn't sound like a McDojo belt at all
 
2014-06-09 05:36:36 AM  
Miss Wisconsin reminds me of Gina Torres.

ww3.hdnux.com
 
2014-06-09 06:25:25 AM  

ko_kyi: 4th degree black belt at age 24?

That doesn't sound like a McDojo belt at all


This^^^

I'd like to see her competition stats.
 
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