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(Short List)   George R R Martin will kill you for $20,000   (shortlist.com) divider line 58
    More: Cool, George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones, Song of Ice, literary history, fashion trends  
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8269 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Jun 2014 at 10:51 AM (29 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



58 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-06-06 10:00:58 AM  
I can easily see a vindictive rich ex-husband donating the twenty thousand to have his ex-wife named in the book as a whore who gets brutally murdered
 
2014-06-06 10:55:08 AM  
Meh. Dan Abnett will do it for free.
 
2014-06-06 10:57:53 AM  
That's pretty cool. There's a sequence in the last book that's just an elaborate Dallas Cowboys vs. NY Giants reference because he lost a bet.
 
2014-06-06 10:58:06 AM  
Does it have to be my real name? Could I maybe submit the name Weiner S. Party as a character?
 
2014-06-06 10:58:21 AM  
Martin is even allowing you to pick the character's station: ordling, knight, peasant, whore, lady, maester, septon, anything. Great I want to be Lord Wigglebottom the Third and I want to die in the brothel surrounded by about 30 underage whores....actually that may have been in one of the books already.
 
2014-06-06 10:58:25 AM  
"Justin Bieber". Please, please please...
 
2014-06-06 10:58:32 AM  
Well, there's no way that incorporating the unnecessary death scenes of 50-100 potential donors will make the book longer to write.
 
2014-06-06 10:59:50 AM  

cgraves67: Well, there's no way that incorporating the unnecessary death scenes of 50-100 potential donors will make the book longer to write.


Reading fail. It's only two fans.
 
2014-06-06 10:59:57 AM  

Buckaroo Beeblebrox: "Justin Bieber". Please, please please...


Can we make him a whore?
 
2014-06-06 11:00:25 AM  
That's a bargain.  At this rate, Jack Daniels is costing me a fair bit more.

/did he also kill the farking link?
 
2014-06-06 11:01:25 AM  
media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com

I think it would be more memorable to be a character that DOESN'T get killed.
 
2014-06-06 11:02:42 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-06-06 11:03:43 AM  
I'm going to suggest that he kill of my best friend Jon Snow.
 
2014-06-06 11:04:10 AM  
So, I guess some people named John Snow and  Tywin Lannister already donated?
 
2014-06-06 11:04:54 AM  
Hey it's probably a tax write-off too since it's for charity. Pretty reasonable price to be honest.
 
2014-06-06 11:05:53 AM  
I'll do it for a lot less.  A couple boxes of .22 ammo and a good meat cleaver
 
2014-06-06 11:09:47 AM  
Isn't that sort of like buying a plot of land on the moon? Sure, it'll be cool if we ever get up there but what are the chances of that happening in our lifetime?
 
2014-06-06 11:17:00 AM  

Cheesehead_Dave: [i.imgur.com image 616x543]


this is farking great
 
2014-06-06 11:17:36 AM  
But I don't want to die in 2020.
 
2014-06-06 11:20:40 AM  

odinsposse: Isn't that sort of like buying a plot of land on the moon? Sure, it'll be cool if we ever get up there but what are the chances of that happening in our lifetime?


You can't, legally, own land on any celestial body; besides the earth. Anybody/anything selling Moon land or Mars land is a con. That deed isn't worth the paper it's printed on.
 
2014-06-06 11:27:05 AM  
I can't help but think he missed his calling as a ship captain.
 
2014-06-06 11:27:13 AM  
www.marvunapp.comstatic.comicvine.com these guys would like a word
 
2014-06-06 11:29:08 AM  
Might be worth it if the book was ever going to be released.
 
2014-06-06 11:31:40 AM  
Even if I had 20,000 bucks there's a good chance I died of old age before Ser Cheese surrender monkey died in the next book.


/George, you slow
//Neil, I know he's not my biatch
/// 'cause he'd get pimp-slapped and sent back to work
 
2014-06-06 11:32:06 AM  
Would it be wrong to legally change your name to Tyrion Lannister before you pay the $20,000?

Im sure that would be epic fan trolling
 
2014-06-06 11:32:24 AM  

RumsfeldsReplacement: I'm going to suggest that he kill of my best friend Jon Snow.


Too Late...
 
2014-06-06 11:40:20 AM  
I'll be killing him if the Martells don't win the game.
 
2014-06-06 11:45:17 AM  
Ser Farty McCrablice, at your service, m'lord.

/AAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH
 
2014-06-06 11:49:03 AM  

Someothermonkey: Might be worth it if the book was ever going to be released.


This.  Might as well give your money to me.  At this rate, he'll never finish writing another book.
 
2014-06-06 11:49:18 AM  

Amish Tech Support: I'll be killing him if the Martells don't win the game.


Argh! I just lost the game. You bast---
 
2014-06-06 11:49:27 AM  
Author John Ringo periodically puts out a "name call" on Facebook for using fan names in his books, and frequently kills them off in unusual ways.
 
2014-06-06 11:52:37 AM  

iheartscotch: odinsposse: Isn't that sort of like buying a plot of land on the moon? Sure, it'll be cool if we ever get up there but what are the chances of that happening in our lifetime?

You can't, legally, own land on any celestial body; besides the earth. Anybody/anything selling Moon land or Mars land is a con. That deed isn't worth the paper it's printed on.


Bah, if it isn't a real deed than why have I been paying property taxes on it all of these years?
 
2014-06-06 12:04:05 PM  
I'm hoping the next book will be out early next year. I'm not expecting it, but I am hoping.
 
2014-06-06 12:08:27 PM  
Ser Richard of House Weiner

Weiner is coming
 
2014-06-06 12:43:59 PM  
Can my character sleep with Marge Tyrell first?
 
2014-06-06 12:52:21 PM  
If you donate the money under the condition that you'll put the money into escrow and pay once the book is released, you'll be able to pay the 20k out of the interest the escrow account will have accumulated.
 
2014-06-06 12:52:30 PM  
Todd Akin. Septon, death by rape.
 
2014-06-06 12:53:46 PM  
Man, people are going to be pissed if I donate

~Ser Pounce
 
2014-06-06 12:55:04 PM  
I'd love to be a character and warg into Hodor, Who would then cock pound the  hell  out of cersei
 
2014-06-06 12:59:01 PM  

litespeed74: I'd love to be a character and warg into Hodor, Who would then cock pound the  hell  out of cersei


And she would love it. Giant prick? Check. Can't talk about farking her? Check. Intelligence of a radish? Check. Oh, she would be all over that.
 
2014-06-06 01:25:21 PM  
George, give me a few weeks to change my name to one of the following: Cat of the Canals, Arya Stark, Arry, Mercy, Salty, or Beth.

Let's see you get around not killing her off.
 
2014-06-06 01:35:26 PM  

Cheesehead_Dave: [i.imgur.com image 616x543]


Brilliant
 
2014-06-06 01:39:57 PM  
He'll kill you off EVENTUALLY.

You know, when he gets around to writing again.

/disillusioned with Martin's slothly pace.
 
2014-06-06 02:09:11 PM  

nitefallz: Cheesehead_Dave: [i.imgur.com image 616x543]

this is farking great


yup, ha!  rare for the internets to cause a game of thrones related LOL after this past weekend, but somehow, the internets did it.
 
2014-06-06 02:23:10 PM  

Dalek Overdrive: Buckaroo Beeblebrox: "Justin Bieber". Please, please please...

Can we make him a whore?


This needs to become a kickstarter.
 
2014-06-06 02:45:07 PM  
Bullshiat.  He'd have to actually finish the book to deliver on this promise.
 
2014-06-06 02:54:28 PM  
Maester Drew Ufia of Farkistan unavailable for comment
 
2014-06-06 03:01:25 PM  

trevzie: Hey it's probably a tax write-off too since it's for charity. Pretty reasonable price to be honest.


$20,000 for your name to be included in a book?  That's reasonable?

He's worth $50 million.  I'm pretty sure he can farking afford to fund his entire pet project charity all by himself.
 
2014-06-06 03:30:44 PM  
He'd kill you for free just for cutting in front of him for coffee. He would describe you perfectly, but he wouldn't use your name.

That would be after 6 pages of describing the food.
 
2014-06-06 03:47:24 PM  
Tolkien would have made you into an elf.
 
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