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(Wall Street Journal)   Coast Guard deploys to Afghanistan, which is completely landlocked and has no interior bodies of water except massive sewage ponds. "People are surprised to see us here," said one Coastie. "We're like unicorns"   (blogs.wsj.com) divider line 51
    More: Interesting, U.S. Coast Guard, Afghanistan, forward operating base, Bagram Airfield, Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel, United States Secretary of Defense  
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4677 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Jun 2014 at 10:57 AM (29 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



51 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-06-02 08:33:44 AM  
They only can be touched by virgins?
 
2014-06-02 08:52:25 AM  
img.fark.net

Trying out new equipment...
 
2014-06-02 09:26:47 AM  
Invaders of Afghanistan throughout the years:

1) Persians
2) Mongols
3) British
4) Soviets
5) Americans
6) Bronies...
 
2014-06-02 10:58:48 AM  
Do they have exterior bodies of water?

/?WTF?
 
2014-06-02 11:00:38 AM  
"We're like unicorns"

I'm used to Obama under-delivering on his campaign promises, but this is ridiculous.
 
2014-06-02 11:01:32 AM  
Submariners' training base in Oklahoma?

Some years back - obviously pork barrel politics, but still...
 
2014-06-02 11:02:08 AM  
Meh, a lot of navy deployed to Afghanistan for support roles and electronic warfare
 
2014-06-02 11:02:18 AM  
They just want to party
 
2014-06-02 11:02:58 AM  

EvilEgg: They only can be touched by virgins?


img3.wikia.nocookie.net

No mayonnaise for me, thank you.
 
2014-06-02 11:04:46 AM  
The navy also has EOD people there.
 
2014-06-02 11:05:07 AM  
More of a unicorn than a CW5?
 
2014-06-02 11:06:29 AM  

SpeedyBB: Submariners' training base in Oklahoma?

Some years back - obviously pork barrel politics, but still...


Maybe they wanted the sailors to adapt to isolation?

Anyway, the Navy developed their nuclear powerplants at a base in Idaho, so landlocked Navy bases are not totally unusual.
 
2014-06-02 11:06:29 AM  

I'D LIKE TO FIND THE GUY THAT NAMED THE COAST GUARD


I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard,


And find the bit of coast he had in mind.


I wonder if he's telling where invasion barges roar;


The coast we are shelling on a South Pacific shore.


Whenever troops invade, we're there to land 'em


With LCI's and LST's galore.


With the shot and shell are raining,


Won't somebody start explaining.


Oh I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard.


CHORUS:


I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard


And find the bit of coast he had in mind.


Whatever he was thinking is a thing that puzzles me,


When submarines are sinking in the middle of the sea.


And I am dodging enemy torpedos,


Or land troops upon a foreign shore,


Then I'll have my salty yearning,


While my hands my gun are burning,


Oh I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard.


I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard


And find the bit of coast he had in mind.


It wasn't on the tanker we'd protect from submarines,


The coast at Casablanca wasn't soft by any means.


I couldn't find it on the beach at Attu,


I couldn't find it at Guadalcanal


If he thinks the name will rate it,


Where the hell can I locate it.


Oh I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard.


I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard


And find the bit of coast he had in mind.


I spent my time in sneezin' in the icy Greenland night


The while my knees are freezin'; and there's not a coast in sight.


No gals, no grub, no place to scrub each mornin'


Just icy fles and Eskimos and seals,


From my ears the ice is fallin' while my weary voice is callin'


Oh I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard.

 
2014-06-02 11:06:48 AM  
TRUE...I'm on Bagram and I saw USCG....like WTF???

The most miserable folks I have ever seen over here were the Navy guys.

Poor swabbies.
 
2014-06-02 11:06:51 AM  
Unicorns huh clicks link hmm... yum

I'd like to see their horns.
 
2014-06-02 11:13:34 AM  
Why are you surprised to see the Navy in Afghanistan. Not only do they have EOD guys there, but does the term "SEAL TEAM" ring any bells?
 
2014-06-02 11:15:00 AM  

SpeedyBB: Submariners' training base in Oklahoma?

Some years back - obviously pork barrel politics, but still...


If it got important legislation passed I don't see the problem in it. Hell the Civil Rights act was passed because of a water plant in Arizona. Yes it would be nice if people voted for legislation based on its merits alone but legislators are sent to represent the interests of their constituents first. If it takes some lard to grease the law through then do it
 
2014-06-02 11:16:11 AM  

Destructor: [img.fark.net image 757x600]

Trying out new equipment...


I have no idea what that is from, but it is completely awesome.
 
2014-06-02 11:16:14 AM  

lifeboat: I'D LIKE TO...



wut


the


shiat
 
2014-06-02 11:18:14 AM  

Arkanaut: "We're like unicorns"

I'm used to Obama under-delivering on his campaign promises, but this is ridiculous.


Technically, wouldn't that be over-delivering?

I mean, when you have crazy (we're talking Florida on the crazy scale) people thinking the President is going to pay their mortgage and put gas in their car then deploying magical, mythical creatures to Afghanistan is a pretty massive over-delivery compared to the whopping under-delivery of "if you like your plan you can keep it," don't you think?
 
2014-06-02 11:19:24 AM  

SpeedyBB: Submariners' training base in Oklahoma?

Some years back - obviously pork barrel politics, but still...



Why not? The inside of a submarine is just a bunch of windowless rooms.
You can build those anywhere.
 
2014-06-02 11:19:28 AM  

Randy-o: TRUE...I'm on Bagram and I saw USCG....like WTF???

The most miserable folks I have ever seen over here were the Navy guys.

Poor swabbies.


Early on in the conflict sailors were voluteering for IA (Individual Augmentation).  Some volinteered because it was considered career enhansing.  Other volunteered because they wanted to wear cammies and carry an M16.
 
2014-06-02 11:19:44 AM  

Lucubrationist: Why are you surprised to see the Navy in Afghanistan. Not only do they have EOD guys there, but does the term "SEAL TEAM" ring any bells?


I'm surprise Seal Team Six hasn't broke down your door because you compared them to the Coast Guard.
 
2014-06-02 11:29:16 AM  
Randy-o: TRUE...I'm on Bagram and I saw USCG....like WTF???

The most miserable folks I have ever seen over here were the Navy guys.

Poor swabbies.

Early on in the conflict sailors were voluteering for IA (Individual Augmentation). Some volinteered because it was considered career enhansing. Other volunteered because they wanted to wear cammies and carry an M16


TRUE....and I KNEW they were Navy because the rifles they were carrying were brand new, unfired and immaculate. For all the good they were....they could have carried BB guns.
 
2014-06-02 11:29:18 AM  
Pack it up
 
2014-06-02 11:31:04 AM  

Aigoo: Arkanaut: "We're like unicorns"

I'm used to Obama under-delivering on his campaign promises, but this is ridiculous.

Technically, wouldn't that be over-delivering?

I mean, when you have crazy (we're talking Florida on the crazy scale) people thinking the President is going to pay their mortgage and put gas in their car then deploying magical, mythical creatures to Afghanistan is a pretty massive over-delivery compared to the whopping under-delivery of "if you like your plan you can keep it," don't you think?


Expecting unicorns and getting Coast Guardsmen is a disappointment. Especially if you have to go to Afghanistan to get them.
 
2014-06-02 11:31:27 AM  

give me doughnuts: Destructor: [img.fark.net image 757x600]

Trying out new equipment...

I have no idea what that is from, but it is completely awesome.


It's been around the internets forever. It's always a thrill to find a relevant spot to use it. :-)
 
2014-06-02 11:33:02 AM  

elob: The navy also has EOD people there.


There was a Coast Guardsman who was killed in Iraq.
 
2014-06-02 11:33:31 AM  

give me doughnuts: Destructor: [img.fark.net image 757x600]
Trying out new equipment...

I have no idea what that is from, but it is completely awesome.



Especially the lift on the starboard side.
 
2014-06-02 11:42:17 AM  

Sgt Otter: elob: The navy also has EOD people there.

There was a Coast Guardsman who was killed in Iraq.


At least Iraq has a coast..
 
2014-06-02 11:57:52 AM  

Sgt Otter: elob: The navy also has EOD people there.

There was a Coast Guardsman who was killed in Iraq.


Meh.  One?  I'm certain more have been killed while on duty in places like New Haven, Philadelphia, Baltimore, and Norfolk.
 
2014-06-02 12:06:04 PM  
"The deployment is longer than most for the Coast Guard, but he will be rewarded. His next post will have plenty of water: St. Thomas in the U.S. Virgin Islands. "

How the fark is that a reward?
 
2014-06-02 12:13:06 PM  

pueblonative: Lucubrationist: Why are you surprised to see the Navy in Afghanistan. Not only do they have EOD guys there, but does the term "SEAL TEAM" ring any bells?

I'm surprise Seal Team Six hasn't broke down your door because you compared them to the Coast Guard.


True, the SEALs would be pissed about the comparison, but here's a fun fact: a few Navy SEALs out there are actually Coasties.
 
2014-06-02 12:13:57 PM  
One of my former cadets served on the CGC Baranov in the Persian Gulf.
He said it was entertaining being shot at by the Iranians.
/SO is USCG
//shallow water, indeed
 
2014-06-02 12:14:51 PM  
DEA, ATF, USDA, EPA plus a bunch more federal agencies deployed door kickers to afghanistan.

They even had some state and big city police agencies deploy there to practice accidentally shooting unarmed women and children while kicking down doors.


But in all seriousness one of the most sought after people for firearms training is a Coastie.
 
2014-06-02 12:15:04 PM  

pueblonative: I'm surprise Seal Team Six hasn't broke down your door because you compared them to the Coast Guard.


They were on their way but their helicopter crashed.
 
2014-06-02 12:15:13 PM  

SpeedyBB: Submariners' training base in Oklahoma?

Some years back - obviously pork barrel politics, but still...


Heck, we have a (very small) naval shipyard near Tulsa...the McClellan-Kerr Navigation System is so narrow that when a ship is heading to or from it, it literally looks like the Navy or Coasties are redefining "prairie schooner" as they go to and from America's most inland port...
 
2014-06-02 12:17:13 PM  

Sgt Otter: elob: The navy also has EOD people there.

There was a Coast Guardsman who was killed in Iraq.


Isn't there a limerick that starts off like that?
 
2014-06-02 12:26:21 PM  

trappedspirit: Sgt Otter: elob: The navy also has EOD people there.

There was a Coast Guardsman who was killed in Iraq.

Isn't there a limerick that starts off like that?


A bullet tore right through his sack, when the corpsman found his nut, the coasties time was already up

/got nuthin
 
2014-06-02 12:45:31 PM  

pueblonative: Lucubrationist: Why are you surprised to see the Navy in Afghanistan. Not only do they have EOD guys there, but does the term "SEAL TEAM" ring any bells?

I'm surprise Seal Team Six hasn't broke down your door because you compared them to the Coast Guard.


I guess even Navy Seals needs heroes... you know, like the Navy is to the Marines.

/The US PHSCC is the best uniformed service... heroes to all.
 
2014-06-02 12:45:40 PM  

Arkanaut: I mean, when you have crazy (we're talking Florida on the crazy scale) people thinking the President is going to pay their mortgage and put gas in their car then deploying magical, mythical creatures to Afghanistan is a pretty massive over-delivery compared to the whopping under-delivery of "if you like your plan you can keep it," don't you think?

Expecting unicorns and getting Coast Guardsmen is a disappointment. Especially if you have to go to Afghanistan to get them.


Depends on the definition of unicorn. Is he talking the mythical creature with horns? Or the mythical hot single female that likes couples? Because the second kind might just be in the coast guard...
 
2014-06-02 12:58:09 PM  

spawn73: "The deployment is longer than most for the Coast Guard, but he will be rewarded. His next post will have plenty of water: St. Thomas in the U.S. Virgin Islands. "

How the fark is that a reward?


Hint: summer dress whites (shorts) look really,really good on your tanned, muscular, lean USCG issued body.
And it's the Virgin Islands. sir.  There are no ugly people there, ever.  They aren't allowed past the terminal at the airport. State law, look it up.
 
2014-06-02 01:14:11 PM  
Obama promised to remove our military from there. The 500,000 Coast Guard personnel are not military, they just happen to have been assigned surplus weaponry, trucks, tanks, artillery, and aircraft.
 
2014-06-02 01:47:17 PM  

Zombies ate my neighbors: Arkanaut: I mean, when you have crazy (we're talking Florida on the crazy scale) people thinking the President is going to pay their mortgage and put gas in their car then deploying magical, mythical creatures to Afghanistan is a pretty massive over-delivery compared to the whopping under-delivery of "if you like your plan you can keep it," don't you think?

Expecting unicorns and getting Coast Guardsmen is a disappointment. Especially if you have to go to Afghanistan to get them.

Depends on the definition of unicorn. Is he talking the mythical creature with horns? Or the mythical hot single female that likes couples? Because the second kind might just be in the coast guard...


If you think Obama promised you threesomes, I think that's even more unrealistic.
 
2014-06-02 02:08:24 PM  

Treetop1000: spawn73: "The deployment is longer than most for the Coast Guard, but he will be rewarded. His next post will have plenty of water: St. Thomas in the U.S. Virgin Islands. "

How the fark is that a reward?

Hint: summer dress whites (shorts) look really,really good on your tanned, muscular, lean USCG issued body.
And it's the Virgin Islands. sir.  There are no ugly people there, ever.  They aren't allowed past the terminal at the airport. State law, look it up.


I know the Virgin Islands, we sold it to you because it was farking hot and full of our former slaves.

OK, so its neat for perhaps 1 week, sipping sangria at the pool.

But I take it they actually have to work there for a duration, its not the place you wish to live if you have any responsibilities beyond fishing from a dingy, sleeping through the worst of the heat, and getting drunk in the evening.

Ie. for everyone thats not Hemmingway, UGH.
 
2014-06-02 02:27:34 PM  

Giltric: DEA, ATF, USDA, EPA plus a bunch more federal agencies deployed door kickers to afghanistan.

They even had some state and big city police agencies deploy there to practice accidentally shooting unarmed women and children while kicking down doors.


But in all seriousness one of the most sought after people for firearms training is a Coastie.


Funny - I was at my local public range (Lewis D Whitaker range in Osceola National Forest), shooting groups at 100 yards with my 22 bench gun.  Having a good day too, with a few incredible groups but most averaging just over MOA (1" at 100 yards).

3 coasties show up, driving a company van, pull out 3 Barrett 50 caliber rifles, and proceed to work their way thru 250 rounds at 100 yards... having a hard time keeping the group on paper.  A piece of paper that was 2 foot by 3 foot.

I offered to put a few thru one of their rifles to see if it was the gun or them, but they declined... kinda laughed at my 22.  Until I pointed out that a few of my groups of 5 shots would fit in one hole that their 50 cal produced when it actually hit the target....
 
2014-06-02 03:04:04 PM  
I once came across some coast guard guys in the Sierra Nevada mountains while doing and archaeological survey (I was doing the survey). They were checking out mines that had potential to leak toxic chemicals in to the local watershed.
 
2014-06-02 05:13:14 PM  

AugieDoggyDaddy: Randy-o: TRUE...I'm on Bagram and I saw USCG....like WTF???

The most miserable folks I have ever seen over here were the Navy guys.

Poor swabbies.

Early on in the conflict sailors were voluteering for IA (Individual Augmentation).  Some volinteered because it was considered career enhansing.  Other volunteered because they wanted to wear cammies and carry an M16.


www.magweb.com
 
2014-06-02 09:29:22 PM  

lifeboat: pueblonative: Lucubrationist: Why are you surprised to see the Navy in Afghanistan. Not only do they have EOD guys there, but does the term "SEAL TEAM" ring any bells?

I'm surprise Seal Team Six hasn't broke down your door because you compared them to the Coast Guard.

True, the SEALs would be pissed about the comparison, but here's a fun fact: a few Navy SEALs out there are actually Coasties.


Well, of course.  You need something you can tell the neighbors - and inquisitive folks on airplanes - that's nominally true, and makes you sound boring enough that they don't want to know any more. ;-)

/"Staff at a university" has been my go-to for years.
 
2014-06-03 02:36:36 AM  

lifeboat: I'D LIKE TO FIND THE GUY THAT NAMED THE COAST GUARD
I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard,
And find the bit of coast he had in mind.
I wonder if he's telling where invasion barges roar;
The coast we are shelling on a South Pacific shore.
Whenever troops invade, we're there to land 'em
With LCI's and LST's galore.
With the shot and shell are raining,
Won't somebody start explaining.
Oh I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard.
CHORUS:
I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard
And find the bit of coast he had in mind.
Whatever he was thinking is a thing that puzzles me,
When submarines are sinking in the middle of the sea.
And I am dodging enemy torpedos,
Or land troops upon a foreign shore,
Then I'll have my salty yearning,
While my hands my gun are burning,
Oh I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard.
I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard
And find the bit of coast he had in mind.
It wasn't on the tanker we'd protect from submarines,
The coast at Casablanca wasn't soft by any means.
I couldn't find it on the beach at Attu,
I couldn't find it at Guadalcanal
If he thinks the name will rate it,
Where the hell can I locate it.
Oh I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard.
I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard
And find the bit of coast he had in mind.
I spent my time in sneezin' in the icy Greenland night
The while my knees are freezin'; and there's not a coast in sight.
No gals, no grub, no place to scrub each mornin'
Just icy fles and Eskimos and seals,
From my ears the ice is fallin' while my weary voice is callin'
Oh I'd like to find the guy that named the Coast Guard.


Thanks for that.

Retired chief MK
CGC Point Divide
CGC Point Bridge
CGC Blackhaw
CGC Morgenthau
CGC Munro
CGC Buttonwood
CGC Aspen
 
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