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(Five Thirty-Eight)   How to tell someone's age when all you know is his or her name. The math behind the rise of Jayden, the deaths of Elmer & Mabel, and the bimodal hisperization of Violet   (fivethirtyeight.com) divider line 110
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6577 clicks; posted to Geek » on 30 May 2014 at 6:40 PM (17 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-05-30 04:38:18 PM
I can make an educated guess as to why "Elmer" dropped off in popularity, I suspect parents were reluctant to name a kid "Elmer' after Elmer Fudd gained prominence.
 
2014-05-30 04:46:10 PM
Violet, you're turning violet!  Violet!
 
2014-05-30 04:47:25 PM

El Supe: I can make an educated guess as to why "Elmer" dropped off in popularity, I suspect parents were reluctant to name a kid "Elmer' after Elmer Fudd gained prominence.


That, or this:

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-05-30 05:09:13 PM
I didn't meet a guy with the same name as me until I was 28. Since then it's been steadily gaining popularity (I'm 42 now), and I hear moms calling their kids often. Still weirds me out, though.
 
2014-05-30 05:23:39 PM

Calmamity: I didn't meet a guy with the same name as me until I was 28. Since then it's been steadily gaining popularity (I'm 42 now), and I hear moms calling their kids often. Still weirds me out, though.

When picking out boys' names, me and the ex were waffling between Calmamity and Bruce. It's not as weird as you think.
 
2014-05-30 05:31:42 PM
For her sake, I hope you chose Calmamity.
 
2014-05-30 05:38:50 PM

Calmamity: For her sake, I hope you chose Calmamity.

Yes, but we had a girl. Tits McGee is starting middle school next year.
 
2014-05-30 06:12:37 PM

exick: Calmamity: I didn't meet a guy with the same name as me until I was 28. Since then it's been steadily gaining popularity (I'm 42 now), and I hear moms calling their kids often. Still weirds me out, though.
When picking out boys' names, me and the ex were waffling between Calmamity and Bruce. It's not as weird as you think.


My first thought was: you must be Australian.
 
2014-05-30 06:13:52 PM
Joseph has been one of the most enduring American names; it's never gone out of fashion.

This is true.  Also, it should be noted, statistics show that almost without exception men named Joseph are considerably more intelligent, attractive, appealing, and successful than men with any other name.  It's also well-known that we they have the largest penises.
 
2014-05-30 06:18:05 PM

El Supe: I can make an educated guess as to why "Elmer" dropped off in popularity, I suspect parents were reluctant to name a kid "Elmer' after Elmer Fudd gained prominence.


Similarly, I'm guessing that Adolph really fell off in popularity as a name along about 70 years ago.
 
2014-05-30 06:29:25 PM

Cyberluddite: Joseph has been one of the most enduring American names; it's never gone out of fashion.

This is true.  Also, it should be noted, statistics show that almost without exception men named Joseph are considerably more intelligent, attractive, appealing, and successful than men with any other name.  It's also well-known that we they have the largest penises.


blog.altoarizona.com

DAMN STRAIGHT!
 
2014-05-30 06:39:27 PM
My name is Steven. WITH A F*CKING "V" GOD DAMMIT!

F*cking PHers having me to spell Steven for people. God dammed assholes.

Bad enough I also have to spell my middle and last name for people. But all three. WTF?
 
2014-05-30 06:46:22 PM

ecmoRandomNumbers: exick: Calmamity: I didn't meet a guy with the same name as me until I was 28. Since then it's been steadily gaining popularity (I'm 42 now), and I hear moms calling their kids often. Still weirds me out, though.
When picking out boys' names, me and the ex were waffling between Calmamity and Bruce. It's not as weird as you think.

My first thought was: you must be Australian.


There's Michael of course, but he's a Pommy Bastard
 
2014-05-30 06:51:12 PM
img.fark.net
 
2014-05-30 06:51:28 PM

Mr. Fuzzypaws: My name is Steven. WITH A F*CKING "V" GOD DAMMIT!

F*cking PHers having me to spell Steven for people. God dammed assholes.

Bad enough I also have to spell my middle and last name for people. But all three. WTF?



Your name is Steven Stephen Stefan ?
 
2014-05-30 06:56:53 PM

kertus: Mr. Fuzzypaws: My name is Steven. WITH A F*CKING "V" GOD DAMMIT!

F*cking PHers having me to spell Steven for people. God dammed assholes.

Bad enough I also have to spell my middle and last name for people. But all three. WTF?


Your name is Steven Stephen Stefan ?


That's my Tony Toni Tone cover band.
 
2014-05-30 06:57:07 PM
You can figure if there is a room with more than 10 men in it, two of them will be named Dave.

/we're everywhere
 
2014-05-30 06:58:00 PM
Off by 15 years for me and 20 for my wife. In opposite directions, even. So yeah, not so useful.
 
2014-05-30 07:03:03 PM
i291.photobucket.com
 
2014-05-30 07:03:11 PM

Smeggy Smurf: You can figure if there is a room with more than 10 men in it, two of them will be named Dave.

/we're everywhere


Dave's not here man.
 
2014-05-30 07:04:27 PM

Smeggy Smurf: You can figure if there is a room with more than 10 men in it, two of them will be named Dave.

/we're everywhere


And 8 Chris'

/Seriously, I'm named Chris and unless I'm alone I'm rarely in a room/bar/office/whatever where there's not at least one other Chris.

//At least you Daves have a cool Kids In The Hall song
 
2014-05-30 07:09:19 PM

downstairs: Smeggy Smurf: You can figure if there is a room with more than 10 men in it, two of them will be named Dave.

/we're everywhere

And 8 Chris'

/Seriously, I'm named Chris and unless I'm alone I'm rarely in a room/bar/office/whatever where there's not at least one other Chris.

//At least you Daves have a cool Kids In The Hall song


and 8 Chris' of mixed gender.
 
2014-05-30 07:26:11 PM

kertus: Mr. Fuzzypaws: My name is Steven. WITH A F*CKING "V" GOD DAMMIT!

F*cking PHers having me to spell Steven for people. God dammed assholes.

Bad enough I also have to spell my middle and last name for people. But all three. WTF?


Your name is Steven Stephen Stefan ?


Steven Fussy Pause
 
2014-05-30 07:27:49 PM

downstairs: Smeggy Smurf: You can figure if there is a room with more than 10 men in it, two of them will be named Dave.

/we're everywhere

And 8 Chris'

/Seriously, I'm named Chris and unless I'm alone I'm rarely in a room/bar/office/whatever where there's not at least one other Chris.

//At least you Daves have a cool Kids In The Hall song



Dave's Not Here!
 
2014-05-30 07:32:29 PM
I was going to say "neck lines"
 
2014-05-30 07:34:35 PM

El Supe: I can make an educated guess as to why "Elmer" dropped off in popularity, I suspect parents were reluctant to name a kid "Elmer' after Elmer Fudd gained prominence.


Nimrod also.In fact, ANY name associated with a dorky character from the past, or from a song that is no longer liked. Lydia suffered a big decline I bet.
 
2014-05-30 07:35:17 PM
I'm gonna name the next hooker in my basement 'Hisperia Zization'.

If  she sasses me, I'll change it to 'Gertrude'.
 
2014-05-30 07:37:06 PM

Smeggy Smurf: You can figure if there is a room with more than 10 men in it, two of them will be named Dave.

/we're everywhere


Do you come from different moms?
 
2014-05-30 07:37:11 PM

kertus: Mr. Fuzzypaws: My name is Steven. WITH A F*CKING "V" GOD DAMMIT!

F*cking PHers having me to spell Steven for people. God dammed assholes.

Bad enough I also have to spell my middle and last name for people. But all three. WTF?


Your name is Steven Stephen Stefan ?


I never understood why my alter ego was called Steven by everyone calling roll. There was no ph to cause confusion.
 
2014-05-30 07:38:04 PM
And my name doesn't show up at all on those lists (Stanley). Oh, well, time to get another beer, anyhow.
 
2014-05-30 07:41:17 PM

haemaker: kertus: Mr. Fuzzypaws: My name is Steven. WITH A F*CKING "V" GOD DAMMIT!

F*cking PHers having me to spell Steven for people. God dammed assholes.

Bad enough I also have to spell my middle and last name for people. But all three. WTF?


Your name is Steven Stephen Stefan ?

That's my Tony Toni Tone cover band.


Steven Stephen Stefan has done it again...
 
2014-05-30 07:53:16 PM

Fano: El Supe: I can make an educated guess as to why "Elmer" dropped off in popularity, I suspect parents were reluctant to name a kid "Elmer' after Elmer Fudd gained prominence.

Nimrod also.In fact, ANY name associated with a dorky character from the past, or from a song that is no longer liked. Lydia suffered a big decline I bet.




Nimrod has also fallen off because if Bugs Bunny.
 
2014-05-30 07:55:56 PM

haemaker: downstairs: Smeggy Smurf: You can figure if there is a room with more than 10 men in it, two of them will be named Dave.

/we're everywhere

And 8 Chris'

/Seriously, I'm named Chris and unless I'm alone I'm rarely in a room/bar/office/whatever where there's not at least one other Chris.

//At least you Daves have a cool Kids In The Hall song

and 8 Chris' of mixed gender.


You know 8 hermaphrodites? And each one of them is named Chris?
 
2014-05-30 07:58:05 PM
I have two friends named Ethel and Priscilla. Both are 20-something latinas. Causation of Correlation?
 
2014-05-30 07:58:59 PM

Fano: El Supe: I can make an educated guess as to why "Elmer" dropped off in popularity, I suspect parents were reluctant to name a kid "Elmer' after Elmer Fudd gained prominence.

Nimrod also.In fact, ANY name associated with a dorky character from the past, or from a song that is no longer liked. Lydia suffered a big decline I bet.



:-(

*sniffle*

/shuffles off dejectedly
 
2014-05-30 08:08:38 PM

El Supe: I can make an educated guess as to why "Elmer" dropped off in popularity, I suspect parents were reluctant to name a kid "Elmer' after Elmer Fudd gained prominence.


My late twenty early thirty-something bartender is named Elmer, after his grandfather.  But I will readily admit to remembering his name after Fudd, at least at first.
 
2014-05-30 08:10:43 PM
The Muppets also presumably account for names falling out of favour.  Grover, Kermit, Oscar, Bert, and Ernie used to be moderately common. Now, not so much

I read an article about naming trends a while back, which noted the then-recent appearance of boys named Gage. It was speculated that parents who were naming their sons that had grown up on Emergency! on which Randolph Mantooth's character. John Gage, was often called by his surname.

Like Violet, Imogene seems to have made a comeback.

A few hundred years back, Mary (or Marie or Maria in non-English-speaking Continental Europe) was ubiquitous. Not only was it practically de rigour to name your first daughter Mary, but if she died (as was routinely common back then), and you subsequently had another daughter, that one would be Mary too.
 
2014-05-30 08:20:44 PM

picturescrazy: Smeggy Smurf: You can figure if there is a room with more than 10 men in it, two of them will be named Dave.

/we're everywhere

Do you come from different moms?


Not me but I can't speak for the other Dave's whore mom
 
2014-05-30 08:24:08 PM

Fano: Nimrod also.In fact, ANY name associated with a dorky character from the past, or from a song that is no longer liked. Lydia suffered a big decline I bet.



As someone born in 1968, I paused to think if I knew any Eleanors my age or a little younger, given both the Turtles' and Beatles' unrelated songs in 1966 & 1968. Maybe it took a while to catch on. Brandy/Brandi, however, seemed to be popular for girls born in the wake of the 1972 Looking Glass hit single (maybe in the UK & NZ too for the "Brandy" songs in 1971 & 72 that Barry Manilow covered in 74 as "Mandy", but I don't know).
 
2014-05-30 08:25:56 PM
I could never name a girl Violet after seeing a certain Amateur Allure video
 
2014-05-30 08:28:41 PM
I didn't make the cut.  Not certain if I should be sad or relieved.
 
2014-05-30 08:35:17 PM
I've never met anyone with my name.  It was never a very popular name but it pretty much disappeared after the civil war.  It does have some positives though.   I "own" my name@gmail, yahoo, outlook etc.  I've also been in crowds of a thousand or two people and have my name shouted and know the person is looking for me.
 
2014-05-30 08:44:21 PM

MaxSupernova: I've never met anyone with my name.  It was never a very popular name but it pretty much disappeared after the civil war.  It does have some positives though.   I "own" my name@gmail, yahoo, outlook etc.  I've also been in crowds of a thousand or two people and have my name shouted and know the person is looking for me.


Bort?  It's Bort isn't it?
 
2014-05-30 09:02:44 PM
I got your baby name math right here:

Jayden + Hayden + Kayden + Aiden + Braden = Idiot Parents
 
2014-05-30 09:29:11 PM
Keith

a fine, virile, masculine, strong name.

it would be on your puny list if not for the overt sexual masculinity it conveys.

/sulks to,corner crying a bit
 
2014-05-30 09:36:05 PM

scalpod: I got your baby name math right here:

Jayden + Hayden + Kayden + Aiden + Braden = Idiot Parents


Farkin' A.

Also, any name with vowels unnessecarily replaced by the letter Y. That goes double for the ones with double Y.

/like the girl in my daughter's class named Bryynlee.
//yarly
 
2014-05-30 09:43:50 PM

TheSwizz: MaxSupernova: I've never met anyone with my name.  It was never a very popular name but it pretty much disappeared after the civil war.  It does have some positives though.   I "own" my name@gmail, yahoo, outlook etc.  I've also been in crowds of a thousand or two people and have my name shouted and know the person is looking for me.

Bort?  It's Bort isn't it?




Drusilla?
 
2014-05-30 09:47:11 PM

Lydia_C: Fano: El Supe: I can make an educated guess as to why "Elmer" dropped off in popularity, I suspect parents were reluctant to name a kid "Elmer' after Elmer Fudd gained prominence.

Nimrod also.In fact, ANY name associated with a dorky character from the past, or from a song that is no longer liked. Lydia suffered a big decline I bet.


:-(

*sniffle*

/shuffles off dejectedly


Aww. You're still loved. And I LIKE the song.
 
2014-05-30 10:01:41 PM

Smeggy Smurf: You can figure if there is a room with more than 10 men in it, two of them will be named Dave.

/we're everywhere


and 4 will be named Mike, I swear to god, you cant swing a dead cat without hitting a Mike.
 
2014-05-30 10:05:26 PM
If half the guys in the room are called Gord, you're in Canada.
 
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