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(The Daily Beast)   Pope Francis says he may retire, opening pope job to yet another person. Is there a form or something you have to fill out?   (thedailybeast.com) divider line 75
    More: Interesting, Pope Francis, Lord Jesus, Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone, La Stampa, Pope Benedict XVI, Vatican bank, God's will  
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9192 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 May 2014 at 4:36 PM (30 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-05-28 12:09:47 PM  
... if, somewhere down the road, he feels his physical and mental health are no longer sufficient to carry out the duties of Papacy.

You know, like his predecessor did, and JP2 should have done before he became an incoherent, drooling shell of a man.
 
2014-05-28 12:42:18 PM  
"We need to look at Benedict XVI as an institution, he opened a door"

A back door, I'm assuming.
 
2014-05-28 12:58:25 PM  
It's good to see someone who is put in a position for life to say that he would be open to bowing out.

SCALIA, ARE YOU LISTENING?
 
2014-05-28 01:05:38 PM  
This sounds like a good thing but there is also a slight part of me that is wondering if he is paving a way for an ealy exit and he is being forced out by a cabal of conservatives within the church who don't like his being open to modernizing the church
 
2014-05-28 01:11:06 PM  
"Hey, it's Pope Francis's last day. Don't forget to sign the card. We're all going out for drinks after work. Are you in?"
 
2014-05-28 01:17:15 PM  

NuttierThanEver: This sounds like a good thing but there is also a slight part of me that is wondering if he is paving a way for an ealy exit and he is being forced out by a cabal of conservatives within the church who don't like his being open to modernizing the church


Plus, you know that the next Pope they choose will be of the ultra-conservative breed. That's why Francis needs to stay where he is for a good 20 years at least until the old guard is gone. Otherwise the next Pope will be someone who thought the Spanish Inquisition was too soft.
 
2014-05-28 02:04:25 PM  

soporific: NuttierThanEver: This sounds like a good thing but there is also a slight part of me that is wondering if he is paving a way for an ealy exit and he is being forced out by a cabal of conservatives within the church who don't like his being open to modernizing the church

Plus, you know that the next Pope they choose will be of the ultra-conservative breed. That's why Francis needs to stay where he is for a good 20 years at least until the old guard is gone. Otherwise the next Pope will be someone who thought the Spanish Inquisition was too soft.


A 97-year old Pope. Hmmm, not impossible, but highly unlikely.
 
2014-05-28 02:12:58 PM  
 Is there a form or something you have to fill out?

Yes, The Papal Retirement (or TPR for short) report.  Just be sure to use the new cover-sheet for it.
 
2014-05-28 02:46:30 PM  

NuttierThanEver: This sounds like a good thing but there is also a slight part of me that is wondering if he is paving a way for an ealy exit and he is being forced out by a cabal of conservatives within the church who don't like his being open to modernizing the church


Meh. With a word he could have ninjas from the Knights Templar cut their heads off.
 
2014-05-28 04:15:03 PM  

NuttierThanEver: This sounds like a good thing but there is also a slight part of me that is wondering if he is paving a way for an ealy exit and he is being forced out by a cabal of conservatives within the church who don't like his being open to modernizing dragging the church into the 19th century.


Still an improvement though.
 
2014-05-28 04:38:11 PM  

dittybopper: Is there a form or something you have to fill out?

Yes, The Papal Retirement (or TPR for short) report.  Just be sure to use the new cover-sheet for it.


-_-
 
2014-05-28 04:38:47 PM  

stpauler: It's good to see someone who is put in a position for life to say that he would be open to bowing out.

SCALIA, ARE YOU LISTENING?


You'll have to speak up.
He's deaf.

And dumb.
Reaaaaaaaaaaaaal dumb.
 
2014-05-28 04:41:23 PM  
"I will do what the Lord tells me to do."

Does the Lord email you? Or do you wait for the voices in your head?

I'm really curious about how the leader of 38 zillion people makes important decisions.
 
2014-05-28 04:42:41 PM  

dittybopper:  Is there a form or something you have to fill out?

Yes, The Papal Retirement (or TPR for short) report.  Just be sure to use the new cover-sheet for it.


The Papal Securement cover form, or TPS for short?
 
2014-05-28 04:45:16 PM  

NuttierThanEver: This sounds like a good thing but there is also a slight part of me that is wondering if he is paving a way for an ealy exit and he is being forced out by a cabal of conservatives within the church who don't like his being open to modernizing the church


It's possible he's just trying to establish a trend, to prevent himself or future popes from growing so old that they are senile while in office.

It might not have been an issue back in the middle ages when people often died by 60 or 70, but with modern medicine, popes may regularly outlive their ability to pope effectively.
 
2014-05-28 04:45:53 PM  
Just have him filled with cybernetic implants.

ROBOPOPE!
 
2014-05-28 04:46:44 PM  

KingKauff: dittybopper:  Is there a form or something you have to fill out?

Yes, The Papal Retirement (or TPR for short) report.  Just be sure to use the new cover-sheet for it.

The Papal Securement cover form, or TPS for short?


Yeahhh, we're gonna need him to keep working
 
2014-05-28 04:48:02 PM  

soporific: Otherwise the next Pope will be someone who thought the Spanish Inquisition was too soft.


Too soft?  Nobody expects the comfy chair!

www.johnpcapitalist.com
 
2014-05-28 04:48:09 PM  

JerseyTim: "Hey, it's Pope Francis's last day. Don't forget to sign the card. We're all going out for drinks after work. Are you in?"


I ordered the cake and Susan in reception is picking it up.

/you made me laugh
//thanks I needed it
 
2014-05-28 04:48:27 PM  

AteMyBrain: "I will do what the Lord tells me to do."

Does the Lord email you? Or do you wait for the voices in your head?

I'm really curious about how the leader of 38 zillion people makes important decisions.


He hears voices in his head, they council him, they understand, they talk to him.
 
2014-05-28 04:48:30 PM  

GRCooper: KingKauff: dittybopper:  Is there a form or something you have to fill out?

Yes, The Papal Retirement (or TPR for short) report.  Just be sure to use the new cover-sheet for it.

The Papal Securement cover form, or TPS for short?

Yeahhh, we're gonna need him to keep working


LAst I heard, he slept in, then went fishing
 
2014-05-28 04:49:13 PM  

dittybopper: Is there a form or something you have to fill out?

Yes, The Papal Retirement (or TPR for short) report.  Just be sure to use the new cover-sheet for it.


No, it's The Papal Senescence (TPS) Report.
 
2014-05-28 04:50:30 PM  

vudukungfu: stpauler: It's good to see someone who is put in a position for life to say that he would be open to bowing out.

SCALIA, ARE YOU LISTENING?

You'll have to speak up.
He's deaf.

And dumb.
Reaaaaaaaaaaaaal dumb.


Hey, Scalia has forgotten more about Constitutional law than most of us will ever know.

Of course, what he remembers about Constitutional law can be written on a postage stamp in 16 pt font.
 
2014-05-28 04:50:58 PM  

AteMyBrain: "I will do what the Lord tells me to do."

Does the Lord email you? Or do you wait for the voices in your head?

I'm really curious about how the leader of 38 zillion people makes important decisions.


Email... and I dare anyone to hack this account.

thehappypill.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-05-28 04:51:53 PM  

SpdrJay: Just have him filled with cybernetic implants.

ROBOPOPE!


Easier just to clone him over and over:

static.rappler.com
 
2014-05-28 04:52:06 PM  
Just not any time soon, please. The Curia will install Pope Darth Hitler Stalin Mao Phelps as backlash to this guy.
 
2014-05-28 04:55:26 PM  
Popin' ain't easy but it's necessary
 
2014-05-28 04:58:05 PM  
Talking about early retirement already? Looks like the Old Guard is making things hot for him.
 
2014-05-28 04:58:18 PM  
Hey, does anyone know if we should be woried about St Malachy's Prophecy???
 
2014-05-28 04:58:36 PM  
Maybe he could do a job-sharing plan?
 
2014-05-28 04:59:54 PM  

Raoul Eaton: Maybe he could do a job-sharing plan?


Kind of a dead end job with no promotion potertial at all, so would you really want it?
 
2014-05-28 05:01:58 PM  

NuttierThanEver: This sounds like a good thing but there is also a slight part of me that is wondering if he is paving a way for an ealy exit and he is being forced out by a cabal of conservatives within the church who don't like his being open to modernizing the church


more likely he's letting the opposition know that they don't have to try and KILL him, just show that enough of the church supports his removal...
 
2014-05-28 05:05:22 PM  
idk man, that job seems to have a high turnover rate, the pay is awful and your boss has a real god complex
 
2014-05-28 05:10:28 PM  

Brick-House: Hey, does anyone know if we should be woried about St Malachy's Prophecy???


doubtful.  there are a lot of those that they REALLY have to stretch to make fit...
 
2014-05-28 05:11:02 PM  
The guy gets to telecommute and wear his bed slippers when he does go into the office.  I bet the bennies package is premium too!  That isn't the kind of job you just give up.
 
2014-05-28 05:12:15 PM  

Brick-House: Hey, does anyone know if we should be woried about St Malachy's Prophecy???


No. The prophecy of the popes is generally regarded to be pretty much meaningless.
The list first appeared in 1590 and was published in 1595. For popes prior to 1590, it has their name, a motto and an explanation for the motto.
 After 1590, only the three popes between 1590 and 1595 have their name included, and the following lines only have the motto and no explanations.  The mottos were short 2-3 word latin phrases (not always in good Latin either), and its thought that all of the mottos and explanations may have been the work of some other individual in the 16th century.
  Proponents of the list make some real stretches to tie popes since 1595 with the motto in the list.

 Francis is supposed to be the final pope in the list, who is named in the list as Peter the Roman, and after he "shelters his sheep in many tribulations" the city of Rome is supposed to be destroyed.

Let's say it is somehow "true", it more likely means a great schism in the church than anything else.
 My mother used to say it meant the next pope after Peter would be Pope Mary, but I don't think we're quite to that point in the church yet.
 
2014-05-28 05:12:26 PM  

Plant Rights Activist: idk man, that job seems to have a high turnover rate, the pay is awful and your boss has a real god complex


point of order, you technically get a bank with the job... pay scale ain't that shabby...
 
2014-05-28 05:13:52 PM  

Rising_Zan_Samurai_Gunman: Brick-House: Hey, does anyone know if we should be woried about St Malachy's Prophecy???

No. The prophecy of the popes is generally regarded to be pretty much meaningless.
The list first appeared in 1590 and was published in 1595. For popes prior to 1590, it has their name, a motto and an explanation for the motto.
 After 1590, only the three popes between 1590 and 1595 have their name included, and the following lines only have the motto and no explanations.  The mottos were short 2-3 word latin phrases (not always in good Latin either), and its thought that all of the mottos and explanations may have been the work of some other individual in the 16th century.
  Proponents of the list make some real stretches to tie popes since 1595 with the motto in the list.

 Francis is supposed to be the final pope in the list, who is named in the list as Peter the Roman, and after he "shelters his sheep in many tribulations" the city of Rome is supposed to be destroyed.

Let's say it is somehow "true", it more likely means a great schism in the church than anything else.
 My mother used to say it meant the next pope after Peter would be Pope Mary, but I don't think we're quite to that point in the church yet.


speaking of, have they ever figured out "pope joan" yet?
 
2014-05-28 05:14:47 PM  

Brick-House: Hey, does anyone know if we should be woried about St Malachy's Prophecy???


Since it's a prophecy and those never come true...uh...no.
 
2014-05-28 05:18:45 PM  

AteMyBrain: "I will do what the Lord tells me to do."

Does the Lord email you? Or do you wait for the voices in your head?

I'm really curious about how the leader of 38 zillion people makes important decisions.


I've known a number of people in my years, (too many, really,) who aren't able to effectively make a distinction between "The voice of God" and "Whatever the hell pops into my head that sounds spiritual." I honestly believe that most of them were actually people of non-negligible sanity who steeped themselves in religious rhetoric day and night for years at a time, then placed a supreme emphasis on "listening to the voice of God." Sure enough, all that religious talk that they lived and breathed would pop up in their thoughts from time to time, and if it was even marginally relevant to something going on in their lives, they would decide that God was actually whispering into their prefrontal cortex.

(Of course, these people were not scholarly and did not have 1.2 people who thought that they were the official voice of God on earth, so when they did something abysmally stupid thinking that God told them to do it, almost nobody noticed.)
 
2014-05-28 05:19:11 PM  

stpauler: It's good to see someone who is put in a position for life to say that he would be open to bowing out.

SCALIA, ARE YOU LISTENING?


Came here to make much the same comment.
 
2014-05-28 05:19:28 PM  
I hope he didn't put all his money in a 401K.
 
2014-05-28 05:20:59 PM  

Martian_Astronomer: 1.2 billion people


Important distinction, there.
 
2014-05-28 05:21:16 PM  
Lighten up, Francis.
 
2014-05-28 05:21:40 PM  
god dammit
 
2014-05-28 05:21:44 PM  
Um no. He said he'll do what god tells him to do. Which may be, "have a seat over there".
 
2014-05-28 05:22:10 PM  
So, according to some wacky prophesy, Pope Frankie is supposed to be the final pope.   For as much good as he is doing, having him retire and seeing a new pope appointed would be a great way to ram it up the ass of the end-times assholes.
 
2014-05-28 05:22:27 PM  

cynicalminion: Rising_Zan_Samurai_Gunman: Brick-House: Hey, does anyone know if we should be woried about St Malachy's Prophecy???

No. The prophecy of the popes is generally regarded to be pretty much meaningless.
The list first appeared in 1590 and was published in 1595. For popes prior to 1590, it has their name, a motto and an explanation for the motto.
 After 1590, only the three popes between 1590 and 1595 have their name included, and the following lines only have the motto and no explanations.  The mottos were short 2-3 word latin phrases (not always in good Latin either), and its thought that all of the mottos and explanations may have been the work of some other individual in the 16th century.
  Proponents of the list make some real stretches to tie popes since 1595 with the motto in the list.

 Francis is supposed to be the final pope in the list, who is named in the list as Peter the Roman, and after he "shelters his sheep in many tribulations" the city of Rome is supposed to be destroyed.

Let's say it is somehow "true", it more likely means a great schism in the church than anything else.
 My mother used to say it meant the next pope after Peter would be Pope Mary, but I don't think we're quite to that point in the church yet.

speaking of, have they ever figured out "pope joan" yet?


It was widely believed in the late Middle Ages, but it is almost certainly untrue.  The major reason to doubt it is that none of the Church's critics at the time used it to attack the Church.  If she had been real it would have made many people of the time see the Eastern Orthodox Church as the true religious authority.
 
2014-05-28 05:24:19 PM  

Rising_Zan_Samurai_Gunman: Francis is supposed to be the final pope in the list, who is named in the list as Peter the Roman


"Francis the Brazilian" was a bit too suggestive...
/yes i know he's argentinian.
 
2014-05-28 05:27:27 PM  

sign_of_Zeta: cynicalminion: Rising_Zan_Samurai_Gunman: Brick-House: Hey, does anyone know if we should be woried about St Malachy's Prophecy???

No. The prophecy of the popes is generally regarded to be pretty much meaningless.
The list first appeared in 1590 and was published in 1595. For popes prior to 1590, it has their name, a motto and an explanation for the motto.
 After 1590, only the three popes between 1590 and 1595 have their name included, and the following lines only have the motto and no explanations.  The mottos were short 2-3 word latin phrases (not always in good Latin either), and its thought that all of the mottos and explanations may have been the work of some other individual in the 16th century.
  Proponents of the list make some real stretches to tie popes since 1595 with the motto in the list.

 Francis is supposed to be the final pope in the list, who is named in the list as Peter the Roman, and after he "shelters his sheep in many tribulations" the city of Rome is supposed to be destroyed.

Let's say it is somehow "true", it more likely means a great schism in the church than anything else.
 My mother used to say it meant the next pope after Peter would be Pope Mary, but I don't think we're quite to that point in the church yet.

speaking of, have they ever figured out "pope joan" yet?

It was widely believed in the late Middle Ages, but it is almost certainly untrue.  The major reason to doubt it is that none of the Church's critics at the time used it to attack the Church.  If she had been real it would have made many people of the time see the Eastern Orthodox Church as the true religious authority.


ok.  my take has always been that people found a socially acceptable way to point out that the pope fathered a child... *shrug*
 
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