Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Daily Mail)   The 10 worst things you can do in a hotel, from talking on a cell phone during check in to denying after the fact that you ordered an XXX movie. Typical - you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot, while I'm trying to run a hotel here   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 160
    More: Interesting, concierges, 4PM  
•       •       •

13811 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 May 2014 at 9:28 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



160 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2014-05-26 08:13:17 AM  
fawltytowers.picture
 
2014-05-26 08:23:54 AM  
Behaayyve.
 
2014-05-26 08:33:57 AM  
Look, mom, I'm trolling on the internet.
 
2014-05-26 08:35:34 AM  
Don't mention the war.
 
2014-05-26 09:07:02 AM  
steal the shower curtain rings.
 
2014-05-26 09:07:12 AM  
As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you
 
2014-05-26 09:13:55 AM  

texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you


Sometimes that information is not readily available though.

"No, no.  I'm at the hotel now.  Did you book us under Mr & Mrs Smith or was it Jones?   Oh, and can I have your credit card number, if I use mine my wife will ask questions"
 
2014-05-26 09:22:04 AM  
I guess I can shiat the bed with impunity!!
 
2014-05-26 09:32:44 AM  
37.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-05-26 09:33:53 AM  
" you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?
 
2014-05-26 09:34:58 AM  
I guess accidentally killing the hooker in the bathroom doesn't rate high enough.


Also, shooting yourself in the head and getting brain matter on the mirror will usually get you kicked out of the place
 
2014-05-26 09:36:10 AM  
Last shaved my balls a few trips back as soon as I got into the room. Then discovered a very slow drain in the shower. The cleaning staff must have been pissed.

Let's make that #11.
 
2014-05-26 09:37:06 AM  

Gunderson: I guess accidentally killing the hooker in the bathroom doesn't rate high enough.


Also, shooting yourself in the head and getting brain matter on the mirror will usually get you kicked out of the place


then why bother giving me a "please do not disturb" door hangar?
 
2014-05-26 09:39:17 AM  

nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?


All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.
 
2014-05-26 09:40:00 AM  
Is this another one of those articles/threads where minimum wageslaves bravely tell their paying customers how best to offer up their patronage via internet rants *after* an impotent encounter?  Ok then.

/I should tip 30% at least, right?
 
2014-05-26 09:40:07 AM  
Talking on the phone while being being waited on by a cashier, desk clerk, anyone is damn rude and needs to be stomped.  Unless the call is specifically related to the transaction in question it should be put on hold.
 
2014-05-26 09:44:10 AM  

Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.


What about adverbs?
 
2014-05-26 09:44:16 AM  
Waiting on the public in any capacity pretty much sucks. Always has, always will.

A fair number of people who work in hotels aren't very good at waiting on people. This will never change,either.

Enjoy your stay.
 
2014-05-26 09:44:40 AM  
www.aerojockey.com

PONCE!
 
2014-05-26 09:47:24 AM  

nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?


I like it. It's somehow fitting because Ponce de Leon was an arrogant f*ck.
Fountain of Youth my @ss.
 
2014-05-26 09:49:48 AM  
#11 Trying to obtain 'full service' from the maids

static01.nyt.com
 
2014-05-26 09:52:02 AM  
I normally check in and replace all the light bulbs I can with black light bulbs.  Then I connect a few strobe lights, placing them strategically in the room.  Then comes the fog machine - running full blast.

If you want to bring a few large potted plants and have jungle noises playing repeatedly (but not full blast), feel free.  I would not suggest bringing a chimpanzee to scare the daylights out of housekeeping when they come to clean.  That is going too far.

/better when done in a long-term stay hotel
//best when done in one of the residential hotels with LARGE rooms
 
2014-05-26 09:52:05 AM  

texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you


OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.
 
2014-05-26 09:53:08 AM  

the opposite of charity is justice: Is this another one of those articles/threads where minimum wageslaves bravely tell their paying customers how best to offer up their patronage via internet rants *after* an impotent encounter?  Ok then.

/I should tip 30% at least, right?


No, you should tip 100%, its the new ponce tax.
 
2014-05-26 09:54:05 AM  

K3rmy: I normally check in and replace all the light bulbs I can with black light bulbs.  Then I connect a few strobe lights, placing them strategically in the room.  Then comes the fog machine - running full blast.

If you want to bring a few large potted plants and have jungle noises playing repeatedly (but not full blast), feel free.  I would not suggest bringing a chimpanzee to scare the daylights out of housekeeping when they come to clean.  That is going too far.

/better when done in a long-term stay hotel
//best when done in one of the residential hotels with LARGE rooms


I've always wanted to leave a pile of plastic skulls in the entryway to greet the maid.
 
2014-05-26 09:54:09 AM  

Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.


Aaand favorited!
 
2014-05-26 09:54:16 AM  
If it's late at night and the hotel doesn't appear full, the worst thing you can do is slap your credit card down on the counter and ask for a room. You will pay full price. Ask how full they are, ask whats the best rate, ask if they can go any lower than their best rate.
 
2014-05-26 09:54:53 AM  
So it is OK to use the sewing kit to sew the sheets to the drapes.
 
2014-05-26 09:55:38 AM  

DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.


That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.
 
2014-05-26 09:59:23 AM  

great_tigers: Last shaved my balls a few trips back as soon as I got into the room. Then discovered a very slow drain in the shower. The cleaning staff must have been pissed.

Let's make that #11.


wife and I went completely bald on our honeymoon.. in the in room hottub. ..yeah.. bad idea apparently
 
2014-05-26 10:00:28 AM  
ONE porno? As in the singular? Subby is a lightweight.
 
2014-05-26 10:01:13 AM  

texdent: DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.

That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.


"Would you please hold? I have a customer in front of me who I'm in the process of checking in/out."
 
2014-05-26 10:02:28 AM  

texdent: DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.

That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.


thats why the Hotel should have an automatic queue on the line.. 3 rings and into queue.
 
2014-05-26 10:02:30 AM  
images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com
Nick Schaffer: What's this $110?
Hotel Clerk: Those are your in-room movies.
Nick Schaffer: No, I didn't watch any movies.
Hotel Clerk: Okay, let's see... Afro Whores.
Nick Schaffer: Afro Whores?
Hotel Clerk: You watched it... let's see... uh, 11 times.
Nick Schaffer: No, no, no...
Hotel Clerk: Afro Whores, 2:30. Afro Whores, 4 o'clock. Afro Whores, 5:30. It says in the morning you watched The Grinch for ten minutes and then switched back over to Afro Whores.
Nick Schaffer: I swear I didn't watch it. Okay? I was at a bachelor party. There were 35 people there. You can ask any of them. You have to take that off my record.
Hotel Clerk: This is not a record, sir.
Nick Schaffer: It... It's a delete.
Hotel Clerk: Okay, fine. How many times *did* you watch it?
Nick Schaffer: None! I didn't watch it!
Hotel Clerk: Are you sure? "Sizzling, three-way, backdoor action featuring two sexy soul sisters... "
Nick Schaffer: [screaming] I don't need to know what it's about! I did not watch it! I didn't.
[hotel clerk raises her eyebrows]
 
2014-05-26 10:02:44 AM  
5. Leaving your rubbish in the hallway
Room service trays are fine. 48 crushed beer cans, three pizza boxes, an empty mouthwash bottle, and what we're really hoping isn't a used condom? Not cool.



Leave them in front of someone else's door.  Problem solved.
 
2014-05-26 10:03:15 AM  

BizarreMan: Talking on the phone while being being waited on by a cashier, desk clerk, anyone is damn rude and needs to be stomped.  Unless the call is specifically related to the transaction in question it should be put on hold.


I'm going to start getting violent on these people. I've already telling the person next to me a made-up obscene story that the woman in front of me and her caller are going to hear loudly, just to piss them off (and 9 times out of 10, it's a woman). In a few cases, they've given me a "how dare you" response when they rapidly put the phone down, but it's not enough.

I've had a few occassions where I'm about to be served and a client rings, and I just drop my place in the queue. You've got voicemail, people. View it like if you're taking a dump, or mid-coitus. Unless you're a doctor on call, you have no excuse.
 
2014-05-26 10:03:24 AM  
I didn't see "don't wipe your dick on the curtains", so I guess I'm still good to go.
 
2014-05-26 10:03:35 AM  

texdent: That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.


Oh, I understand that it is usually the result of some corporate policy to always answer to avoid losing a potential customer.
 
2014-05-26 10:04:30 AM  
My list:
1. Upper Decker.
2.  This:
img.youtube.com
3. Purchasing "Mr Magorium Wonder Emporium"
 
2014-05-26 10:04:44 AM  

lindalouwho: texdent: DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.

That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.

"Would you please hold? I have a customer in front of me who I'm in the process of checking in/out."


That's what I tried to do anyways, but then they'll keep calling back just getting angrier in the process.
 
2014-05-26 10:04:54 AM  

texdent: Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.

What about adverbs?


Lolly has them.
 
2014-05-26 10:08:45 AM  
you ponce in here


img1.wikia.nocookie.net

"Hai guyz ... what's going on in this thread?"
 
2014-05-26 10:09:43 AM  

largedon: Nick Schaffer: What's this $110?
Hotel Clerk: Those are your in-room movies.
Nick Schaffer: No, I didn't watch any movies.
Hotel Clerk: Okay, let's see... Afro Whores.
Nick Schaffer: Afro Whores?
Hotel Clerk: You watched it... let's see... uh, 11 times.
Nick Schaffer: No, no, no...
Hotel Clerk: Afro Whores, 2:30. Afro Whores, 4 o'clock. Afro Whores, 5:30. It says in the morning you watched The Grinch for ten minutes and then switched back over to Afro Whores.
Nick Schaffer: I swear I didn't watch it. Okay? I was at a bachelor party. There were 35 people there. You can ask any of them. You have to take that off my record.
Hotel Clerk: This is not a record, sir.
Nick Schaffer: It... It's a delete.
Hotel Clerk: Okay, fine. How many times *did* you watch it?
Nick Schaffer: None! I didn't watch it!
Hotel Clerk: Are you sure? "Sizzling, three-way, backdoor action featuring two sexy soul sisters... "
Nick Schaffer: [screaming] I don't need to know what it's about! I did not watch it! I didn't.
[hotel clerk raises her eyebrows]


Came here to DAK the "Afro-Whores", leaving satisfied :D
 
2014-05-26 10:09:46 AM  

farkeruk: BizarreMan: Talking on the phone while being being waited on by a cashier, desk clerk, anyone is damn rude and needs to be stomped.  Unless the call is specifically related to the transaction in question it should be put on hold.

I'm going to start getting violent on these people. I've already telling the person next to me a made-up obscene story that the woman in front of me and her caller are going to hear loudly, just to piss them off (and 9 times out of 10, it's a woman). In a few cases, they've given me a "how dare you" response when they rapidly put the phone down, but it's not enough.

I've had a few occassions where I'm about to be served and a client rings, and I just drop my place in the queue. You've got voicemail, people. View it like if you're taking a dump, or mid-coitus. Unless you're a doctor on call, you have no excuse.


Call me while I am on the shiatter at your own risk. I'm answering that shiat.
 
2014-05-26 10:11:11 AM  

OtherLittleGuy: texdent: Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.

What about adverbs?

Lolly has them.


i291.photobucket.com
 
2014-05-26 10:13:00 AM  
I see about ten FU and you took my moneys on this list.
 
2014-05-26 10:13:13 AM  
ProTip: Always deny the cum stains.

/Tip? At a motel/hotel. The hell you say.
 
2014-05-26 10:14:49 AM  

texdent: Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.

What about adverbs?


These days, I prefer gerunding instead.
 
2014-05-26 10:17:12 AM  

Smackledorfer: Call me while I am on the shiatter at your own risk. I'm answering that shiat.


I had a new client call me from the khazi recently. Like WTF? I can understand answering a call there, but sitting down and thinking "hey, I'll call that guy up about a project". Who does that?
 
2014-05-26 10:18:39 AM  
The Patels have really gotten bossy towards customers.
 
2014-05-26 10:18:41 AM  

farkeruk: I've had a few occassions where I'm about to be served and a client rings, and I just drop my place in the queue.


Thank you. I appreciate people like you!

I once saw a Subway server ask "May I take your order?" to a guy on his phone with about fifteen people behind him. He did that "one moment" thing with his index finger, expecting everyone to just wait for him. Even though I was ahead of him, already getting my food, I felt like slapping him silly.

/his "one moment" was, of course, about a minute
//guy behind him didn't notice since he was on his phone too, and the guy behind him didn't... you get the idea
 
2014-05-26 10:20:17 AM  
When I worked front desk, I was amazed by the number of businessmen who accidently went to the porno channel, confirmed they were over 18, scrolled through the selections, selected a movie, confirmed they were over 18 again, confirmed that they wanted to watch the movie, then accidently watched the movie for five minutes.

/Always took it off the bill because I hated that job.
 
2014-05-26 10:21:14 AM  

texdent: lindalouwho: texdent: DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.

That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.

"Would you please hold? I have a customer in front of me who I'm in the process of checking in/out."

That's what I tried to do anyways, but then they'll keep calling back just getting angrier in the process.


Entitled impatient jerks.
 
2014-05-26 10:22:17 AM  
I have a friend who is a travel agent who travels all over the world all the time.

He was in a Marriot in DC and noticed a cigarette butt on the table next to the elevator.

He saw it there the next day and took a pic of it and posted it on Marriots forum.

The next day it was still there so he placed a spoon next to it, and posted another pic.

He was in DC for about 8 days, so for 8 days he kept adding items, receipts, and orange peel, and kept posting them.

Marriot club members were responding him and calling him an asshole and all sorts of names.

However, when he got home to Bogota, there was a package from Marriot.  It was a video camera with a letter thanking him for his work and the hotel staff had been instructed on how they hotel should be cleaned, and they asked him to bring the video camera with him whenever he stayed in one of their properties so he could post videos on their hotels failings with his funny commentaries.
 
2014-05-26 10:24:38 AM  
Conversely, a list for hotels:

1. Actually have staff willing to do their jobs. Porters that refuse to help with luggage, coupled with cleaning staff that can't make a bed, is a waste of time.
2. Actually have a concierge capable of the job. A concierge that doesn't know anything about the area, or cops an attitude when asked basic questions, is a waste of time.
3. Fix problems before guests encounter them. Good hotels ensure that the remote's checked - bad hotels lose the friggin' remote and try to charge you for it.
4. Handle criticism well. Don't blow off bad reviews on Yelp, or angry customers, because, hey, fark them, right?
5. Provide adequate waste facilities. A table for trays and a wastebasket larger than a helmet ensures that the hall doesn't fill up with trash because there's no place in the room to place it.
6. Stop stealing my stuff. Sure, I may have misplaced that $2.00 plastic card used to get into my room, but your staff certainly didn't - half my wardrobe didn't get up and walk off by itself.
7. Actually ensure that what's ordered for room service shows up. I've been in more than one hotel where the order's not just wrong, but for the wrong room, and the hotel still tried to charge us for it.
8. I'll stop denying "adult features" when you stop denying bedbugs. I'm tired of hosting your guests in my house after a trip. You pay for cleaning & fumigation, I'll pay for Big Booty Bombshells 3. Deal?
9. Ensure that my room's ready on check-in. There's nothing worse than standing in the lobby, with my luggage, for an hour while you hurriedly mop up jizz after the last "guest".
10. Likewise. When I'm checking in, stop answering the goddamned phone and complete the process - check-in shouldn't take 45 minutes because you have better things to do.
 
2014-05-26 10:26:57 AM  
Pro-tip:  If you ever go back to your room during the day to find that it's not made-up, but you wish it was, simply sit down for a leisurely dump.  That biatch will be along directly.
 
2014-05-26 10:27:18 AM  

Hilary T. N. Seuss: farkeruk: I've had a few occassions where I'm about to be served and a client rings, and I just drop my place in the queue.

Thank you. I appreciate people like you!

I once saw a Subway server ask "May I take your order?" to a guy on his phone with about fifteen people behind him. He did that "one moment" thing with his index finger, expecting everyone to just wait for him. Even though I was ahead of him, already getting my food, I felt like slapping him silly.

/his "one moment" was, of course, about a minute
//guy behind him didn't notice since he was on his phone too, and the guy behind him didn't... you get the idea


Huh. That doesn't fly in most of the restaurants down here in Seattle. You pull that shiat, the person behind the counter tells you step aside - complain, and you risk being refused service entirely. Lots of places with signs to that effect here, too. You're not too important to kick to the curb.
 
2014-05-26 10:27:29 AM  

texdent: DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.

That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.


"But I'm more important! I'm VISIBLE!!!"
 
2014-05-26 10:29:42 AM  
 
2014-05-26 10:30:39 AM  

lindalouwho: texdent: DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.

That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.

"Would you please hold? I have a customer in front of me who I'm in the process of checking in/out."


"No! I'm more important! I'm ON THE PHONE!!"

/damned either way
 
2014-05-26 10:30:55 AM  

farkeruk: BizarreMan: Talking on the phone while being being waited on by a cashier, desk clerk, anyone is damn rude and needs to be stomped.  Unless the call is specifically related to the transaction in question it should be put on hold.

I'm going to start getting violent on these people. I've already telling the person next to me a made-up obscene story that the woman in front of me and her caller are going to hear loudly, just to piss them off (and 9 times out of 10, it's a woman). In a few cases, they've given me a "how dare you" response when they rapidly put the phone down, but it's not enough.

I've had a few occassions where I'm about to be served and a client rings, and I just drop my place in the queue. You've got voicemail, people. View it like if you're taking a dump, or mid-coitus. Unless you're a doctor on call, you have no excuse.


I'm fine with that. It's when I'm already being served, and the person handling the task repeatedly drops me to answer the phone, to the point where we have to restart the process at least once, that irritates me. Yes, I get that you're behind the desk, but, seriously, 45 minutes to verify my identity and method of payment, so you can hand me a room key?

There has to be some form of balance there.
 
2014-05-26 10:32:26 AM  

BizarreMan: Talking on the phone while being being waited on by a cashier, desk clerk, anyone is damn rude and needs to be stomped.  Unless the call is specifically related to the transaction in question it should be put on hold.


Note...it is also quite rude that staff or counter person is on the phone while attending a customer....I see this way more that a customer on the phone while being attended
 
2014-05-26 10:33:06 AM  

Publikwerks: My list:
1. Upper Decker.
2.  This:

3. Purchasing "Mr Magorium Wonder Emporium"


Is that neil degrass tyson?
 
2014-05-26 10:33:24 AM  

farkeruk: Smackledorfer: Call me while I am on the shiatter at your own risk. I'm answering that shiat.

I had a new client call me from the khazi recently. Like WTF? I can understand answering a call there, but sitting down and thinking "hey, I'll call that guy up about a project". Who does that?


Now there I agree. I would never start a call in the bathroom.
 
2014-05-26 10:33:53 AM  
But as far as being on the phone while at other places, such as the store when you're checking in. I don't talk much to the customer anyways while I'm dealing with their groceries aside from some small talk, but I want them to at least pay attention. The other day I had this one guy who on the phone the entire time and when everything was done, he walked away without his cart. I had to call after him to return
 
2014-05-26 10:35:12 AM  

FloridaFarkTag: BizarreMan: Talking on the phone while being being waited on by a cashier, desk clerk, anyone is damn rude and needs to be stomped.  Unless the call is specifically related to the transaction in question it should be put on hold.

Note...it is also quite rude that staff or counter person is on the phone while attending a customer....I see this way more that a customer on the phone while being attended


I've seen both, but I used to see the customer on the phone more often.  Also, I'm not talking about hotel front desk clerks answering the hotel's phone.
 
2014-05-26 10:37:30 AM  
I'm always a cordial guest.  But STFU if you run a hotel, I don't want to hear you biatching.
 
2014-05-26 10:39:40 AM  
9. Getting belligerent your room isn't ready when you arrive at 10am, but check-in's at 4pm
And if you insist on checking out the next day at 4pm, don't go all Russell Crowe when you're charged for another night.


IMO, there's been a noticeable creep here.  Check-in 4pm?  fark You.  How late are you going to push that?  In 5-years it'll be 6pm.

What's the over/under on a "Housekeeping!" knock in a typical businesss hotel (if, God forbid, you forget your DND sign)? 8h30-ish sound about right?  So their cleaning rooms way before noon.  At least some of those are people who are checking out that day.  Then the normal check-out time of noon, and the rest go.

Are you telling me it takes 4 hours to clean the enough rooms for the occasional early arriver, since most check-outs are long gone by the start of business?

No way, no how.  Anyway, the only time I've ever been refused early check-in is arriving very early after overseas flights...in which case they're usually happy to store your stuff until a room opens up.
 
2014-05-26 10:41:14 AM  

OtherLittleGuy: "No! I'm more important! I'm ON THE PHONE!!"


ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2014-05-26 10:41:38 AM  

Delta1212: All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.


Or, rather, all nouns have verbed, all adjectives are nounly, and the verbs have ceased to be!

< grinds teeth >

As for hotel behavior, where is making the bathroom floor about six inches deep with soap bars, vomit, and grapefruit rinds, mixed with broken glass?  What about leaving the rug so thick with marijuana seeds that it appears to be turning green? Or  creating a general back-alley ambience so rotten, so incredibly foul, that you could probably get away with claiming it was some kind of 'Life-slice exhibit' brought down from Haight Street, to show cops from other parts of the country how deep into filth and degeneracy the drug people will sink, if left to their own devices?

'cuz *that's* living!
 
2014-05-26 10:42:31 AM  
Excuse me, I need to check my mail in another browser. I'll comment on this thread in juuuust a moment...
 
2014-05-26 10:44:22 AM  

texdent: Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.

What about adverbs?


Those are now gerunds.
 
2014-05-26 10:51:35 AM  

FormlessOne: Conversely, a list for hotels:

1. Actually have staff willing to do their jobs. Porters that refuse to help with luggage, coupled with cleaning staff that can't make a bed, is a waste of time.
2. Actually have a concierge capable of the job. A concierge that doesn't know anything about the area, or cops an attitude when asked basic questions, is a waste of time.
3. Fix problems before guests encounter them. Good hotels ensure that the remote's checked - bad hotels lose the friggin' remote and try to charge you for it.
4. Handle criticism well. Don't blow off bad reviews on Yelp, or angry customers, because, hey, fark them, right?
5. Provide adequate waste facilities. A table for trays and a wastebasket larger than a helmet ensures that the hall doesn't fill up with trash because there's no place in the room to place it.
6. Stop stealing my stuff. Sure, I may have misplaced that $2.00 plastic card used to get into my room, but your staff certainly didn't - half my wardrobe didn't get up and walk off by itself.
7. Actually ensure that what's ordered for room service shows up. I've been in more than one hotel where the order's not just wrong, but for the wrong room, and the hotel still tried to charge us for it.
8. I'll stop denying "adult features" when you stop denying bedbugs. I'm tired of hosting your guests in my house after a trip. You pay for cleaning & fumigation, I'll pay for Big Booty Bombshells 3. Deal?
9. Ensure that my room's ready on check-in. There's nothing worse than standing in the lobby, with my luggage, for an hour while you hurriedly mop up jizz after the last "guest".
10. Likewise. When I'm checking in, stop answering the goddamned phone and complete the process - check-in shouldn't take 45 minutes because you have better things to do.




I love the Yelp reviews where people complain about the weather.
 
2014-05-26 10:53:10 AM  

FormlessOne: Conversely, a list for hotels:

1. Actually have staff willing to do their jobs. Porters that refuse to help with luggage, coupled with cleaning staff that can't make a bed, is a waste of time.
2. Actually have a concierge capable of the job. A concierge that doesn't know anything about the area, or cops an attitude when asked basic questions, is a waste of time.
3. Fix problems before guests encounter them. Good hotels ensure that the remote's checked - bad hotels lose the friggin' remote and try to charge you for it.
4. Handle criticism well. Don't blow off bad reviews on Yelp, or angry customers, because, hey, fark them, right?
5. Provide adequate waste facilities. A table for trays and a wastebasket larger than a helmet ensures that the hall doesn't fill up with trash because there's no place in the room to place it.
6. Stop stealing my stuff. Sure, I may have misplaced that $2.00 plastic card used to get into my room, but your staff certainly didn't - half my wardrobe didn't get up and walk off by itself.
7. Actually ensure that what's ordered for room service shows up. I've been in more than one hotel where the order's not just wrong, but for the wrong room, and the hotel still tried to charge us for it.
8. I'll stop denying "adult features" when you stop denying bedbugs. I'm tired of hosting your guests in my house after a trip. You pay for cleaning & fumigation, I'll pay for Big Booty Bombshells 3. Deal?
9. Ensure that my room's ready on check-in. There's nothing worse than standing in the lobby, with my luggage, for an hour while you hurriedly mop up jizz after the last "guest".
10. Likewise. When I'm checking in, stop answering the goddamned phone and complete the process - check-in shouldn't take 45 minutes because you have better things to do.


This, especially 9.  We drive to our destinations rather than fly (its a hell of a lot cheaper, even cross-country).  We also tend to drive at night, since we have an 18-month-old that doesn't handle car rides very well unless he's sleeping.  So when I arrive exhausted at noon at your hotel, surviving on the last dregs of my 8th coffee, do me a favor and have my room ready.  I've NEVER seen housekeeping tending ANY room past noon, so you can't tell me a room isn't available.  Your parking lot has, what, 10 cars in it?  I know at least 4 of those are staff.  Don't feed me a line that no rooms are available until 4 pm.  Give me my farking room key and then go back to browsing Facebook.
 
2014-05-26 10:54:14 AM  
Other things about the hotel:
If you're having issues with the cab, don't expect the front desk to solve it and if they won't take credit for whatever reason, don't ask the front desk to pay for it. I mean yes, the FD will pay for the ride in certain circumstances, but not if the driver is being a dick about something

Please know which hotel you're staying at. Don't just show up and hand us your key card asking where you're staying. Sure, if the hotel name has Hilton on it, and you're asking a Marriot FD clerk where you're staying, the most we'll be able to tell you is that you're at a Hilton

Please, for the love of our sanity, put down everyone who is staying with you so that if they lose their room key, we can just look them up and see if they're attached to the room. Otherwise, we can only give out the key to the person whose name is on the room.
 
2014-05-26 10:54:29 AM  

texdent: Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.

What about adverbs?


I first heard ' ponce ' ( also ' poncin about ' e.g.  Why's he poncin' about while there's work to be done ? ) in the 60's, most recent in the dialogue of the t v series, The Thin Blue Line ( Rowan Atkinson ).
 
2014-05-26 10:55:23 AM  

djones101: FormlessOne: Conversely, a list for hotels:

1. Actually have staff willing to do their jobs. Porters that refuse to help with luggage, coupled with cleaning staff that can't make a bed, is a waste of time.
2. Actually have a concierge capable of the job. A concierge that doesn't know anything about the area, or cops an attitude when asked basic questions, is a waste of time.
3. Fix problems before guests encounter them. Good hotels ensure that the remote's checked - bad hotels lose the friggin' remote and try to charge you for it.
4. Handle criticism well. Don't blow off bad reviews on Yelp, or angry customers, because, hey, fark them, right?
5. Provide adequate waste facilities. A table for trays and a wastebasket larger than a helmet ensures that the hall doesn't fill up with trash because there's no place in the room to place it.
6. Stop stealing my stuff. Sure, I may have misplaced that $2.00 plastic card used to get into my room, but your staff certainly didn't - half my wardrobe didn't get up and walk off by itself.
7. Actually ensure that what's ordered for room service shows up. I've been in more than one hotel where the order's not just wrong, but for the wrong room, and the hotel still tried to charge us for it.
8. I'll stop denying "adult features" when you stop denying bedbugs. I'm tired of hosting your guests in my house after a trip. You pay for cleaning & fumigation, I'll pay for Big Booty Bombshells 3. Deal?
9. Ensure that my room's ready on check-in. There's nothing worse than standing in the lobby, with my luggage, for an hour while you hurriedly mop up jizz after the last "guest".
10. Likewise. When I'm checking in, stop answering the goddamned phone and complete the process - check-in shouldn't take 45 minutes because you have better things to do.

This, especially 9.  We drive to our destinations rather than fly (its a hell of a lot cheaper, even cross-country).  We also tend to drive at night, since we have an 18-month-old that doesn't handle ...


The parking lot may be nearly empty but that doesn't mean that the hotel could be sold out.
 
2014-05-26 10:56:50 AM  
Funnier the first three times, Basil.
 
2014-05-26 10:57:27 AM  

Thunderbox: I first heard ' ponce ' ( also ' poncin about ' e.g.  Why's he poncin' about while there's work to be done ? )


You *can* "ponce about" or "ponce around", but you cannot "ponce".

Unless you're subby, in which case go wild.
 
2014-05-26 10:59:59 AM  

OtherLittleGuy: lindalouwho: texdent: DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.

That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.

"Would you please hold? I have a customer in front of me who I'm in the process of checking in/out."

"No! I'm more important! I'm ON THE PHONE!!"

/damned either way


First come/call first served.

Whatever happened to that?
 
2014-05-26 11:00:28 AM  
What's a Concierge?
 
2014-05-26 11:02:54 AM  

Clemkadidlefark: What's a Concierge?


There's this thing called Google.
 
2014-05-26 11:04:48 AM  
So, I guess farking in the elevator is still ok?
 
2014-05-26 11:05:30 AM  

jpo2269: So, I guess farking in the elevator is still ok?


You've gotta kill time somehow if the elevator gets stuck between floors.
 
2014-05-26 11:10:39 AM  
images2.static-bluray.com
 
2014-05-26 11:11:00 AM  

nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?


Welcome to the 1970's!
 
2014-05-26 11:11:15 AM  

nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?


At the very least, 1979.
 
2014-05-26 11:11:25 AM  

Clemkadidlefark: What's a Concierge?


It's a Garçon for fancy hotel lobbies.
 
2014-05-26 11:12:57 AM  

Clemkadidlefark: What's a Concierge?


not sure.. maybe ask jeeves?
 
2014-05-26 11:14:25 AM  
I think French hoteliers are the best at nipping that shiat in the bud. Try any of that on them and they'll cut you down to size toute-suite.
 
2014-05-26 11:23:21 AM  

Hilary T. N. Seuss: farkeruk: I've had a few occassions where I'm about to be served and a client rings, and I just drop my place in the queue.

Thank you. I appreciate people like you!

I once saw a Subway server ask "May I take your order?" to a guy on his phone with about fifteen people behind him. He did that "one moment" thing with his index finger, expecting everyone to just wait for him. Even though I was ahead of him, already getting my food, I felt like slapping him silly.

/his "one moment" was, of course, about a minute
//guy behind him didn't notice since he was on his phone too, and the guy behind him didn't... you get the idea


I use to work at Subway, we would skip people like that. It happened all the time, and most people surprisingly didn't say anything just gave either a confused or dirty look. The few people who did say something usually start with "I'll call you right back" and hang up the phone, so before they could yell we'd be right there with a "oh you're off your phone are you ready to order?"

/The worst were the people who wanted to hand us the phone to take their friends/whatever order, I would speak overly load and make sure to spit as much as I could when talking into their phone, more often then not they would wipe it off before returning it to their ears. Seriously how stupid are people that they can't write down a simple order?
 
2014-05-26 11:25:26 AM  

the opposite of charity is justice: Is this another one of those articles/threads where minimum wageslaves bravely tell their paying customers how best to offer up their patronage via internet rants *after* an impotent encounter?  Ok then.

/I should tip 30% at least, right?


No matter how much YOU tip, they will refer to you as, "That asshole."

It's strictly personal.
 
2014-05-26 11:32:13 AM  
Why would anyone order hotel porn in the first place when they have the internets?

If you're THAT ashamed of the front desk clerk knowing you busted a nut, use Porn Hub, a private browser and 12 proxies.

Protip: the hotel staff doesn't care. If you start making a big deal out of it? Streisand Effect.
 
2014-05-26 11:37:11 AM  

Clemkadidlefark: What's a Concierge?


The guy that gets you whores in nice hotels. Motel 6 calls that the pimp round back yo.
 
2014-05-26 11:40:17 AM  

tjsands1118: Hilary T. N. Seuss: farkeruk: I've had a few occassions where I'm about to be served and a client rings, and I just drop my place in the queue.

Thank you. I appreciate people like you!

I once saw a Subway server ask "May I take your order?" to a guy on his phone with about fifteen people behind him. He did that "one moment" thing with his index finger, expecting everyone to just wait for him. Even though I was ahead of him, already getting my food, I felt like slapping him silly.

/his "one moment" was, of course, about a minute
//guy behind him didn't notice since he was on his phone too, and the guy behind him didn't... you get the idea

I use to work at Subway, we would skip people like that. It happened all the time, and most people surprisingly didn't say anything just gave either a confused or dirty look. The few people who did say something usually start with "I'll call you right back" and hang up the phone, so before they could yell we'd be right there with a "oh you're off your phone are you ready to order?"

/The worst were the people who wanted to hand us the phone to take their friends/whatever order, I would speak overly load and make sure to spit as much as I could when talking into their phone, more often then not they would wipe it off before returning it to their ears. Seriously how stupid are people that they can't write down a simple order?


I guess even dumberer than the ones who cant use the speaker phone function
 
2014-05-26 11:54:30 AM  

tjsands1118: I use to work at Subway, we would skip people like that. It happened all the time, and most people surprisingly didn't say anything just gave either a confused or dirty look. The few people who did say something usually start with "I'll call you right back" and hang up the phone, so before they could yell we'd be right there with a "oh you're off your phone are you ready to order?"

/The worst were the people who wanted to hand us the phone to take their friends/whatever order, I would speak overly load and make sure to spit as much as I could when talking into their phone, more often then not they would wipe it off before returning it to their ears. Seriously how stupid are people that they can't write down a simple order?


I've done my fair share of working in fast food industry, luckily before everyone got cellphone douchey.  I still know how to politely place the order while leaving the person I was talking to hanging on.  It only happened like once or twice, but they understood they could hang up or wait till I was done placing the order.  I also can recall my whole families order from the last time we ate there, so I don't need to call them for their part of the order.
 
2014-05-26 11:56:15 AM  

Smackledorfer: Now there I agree. I would never start a call in the bathroom.


I dunno.  That's usually when I return calls to my ex-wife.
 
2014-05-26 12:00:25 PM  
How bout this?  Wash my damn towels!
 
2014-05-26 12:02:42 PM  

K3rmy: I normally check in and replace all the light bulbs I can with black light bulbs.


Relevant
 
2014-05-26 12:07:53 PM  
I never had a seriously bad experience in any hotels I stayed in. I used to like to find the small 'Mom and Pop' versions because the rooms were more unique, not cookie-cutter and the occasional surprise would pop up, like there being a kitchenette included.

One hotel held my room for me even though I ran about two hours late, on a Friday, when they were busiest.

I was in Georgia when I checked into a hotel well after midnight after a long driving trip. I asked when checkout time was to discover it was 11 am -- and I was there at 1 am. I jumped into the shower to discover they didn't have traction strips on the bottom of the wonderfully clean tub and wound up doing a mad little dance to keep my balance. By the time I hit the hay, it was a little after 2 and I had to leave a wake-up call request for 9 to make sure I got up and out before being charged for another day.

I didn't like that.
 
2014-05-26 12:16:35 PM  
On PPV Videos at checkout - "and did you enjoy "Cock-Mongers"?" Robert Schimmel - RIP
 
2014-05-26 12:16:35 PM  
I worked for a company that provided movies, video games and non theatricals(porn) to hotels. Front desk staff would call and ask if they could remove Backdoor sluts 9 from the bill and we'd say, yes you can but  57 minutes of it appeared on their tv which was powered on so we're still charging your hotel.

Average view time of a non theatrical? 8 minutes.
 
2014-05-26 12:16:47 PM  
I worked as night porter for 5 and a half years in a 103-bedroomed three-star hotel in Kent up until '99.

1. Actually, I had so many different tasks to accomplish every night, I COULD actually tell you why your door key wasn't working while making you a cocktail, before making up an extra bed in your room and then setting up 6 meeting rooms for the morning.

2. "Know where we can get some girls for the evening?"
"Yes sir, find a good woman and marry her, sooner or later you'll want to have children, hopefully one of those children will be female."
"No, I meant escorts."
"Certainly sir, I'll escort you out the door if you treat my hotel as a brothel again."

3. Only the once. He thumped the reception desk while reciting his pre-prepared speech about 'the catalogue of errors he'd experienced.' Someone else I threatened to show the door unless he calmed down a tad. Complete fabrication, but the manager took £50 off his tab, meaning he was free to do it again as his next stop

4. Yelp wasn't around, but we had plenty of 'I'm very influential/don't you know who i am' types. We can do just fine without your opinion, thanks

5. Plates, fine. Leave your shoes outside your room, expecting them to be cleaned, and you're going to be sorely disappointed. I don't care if that's what they do in germany

6. Meh

7. Ask away, but he kitchen is locked up. Lasagne, pasta bake or sandwiches. There's a 24-hour McD's a mile or so away of you fancy a drive

8. "So you didn't order that movie? According to the computer records, you watched that film for 20 minutes before turning it off. I don't care if you ARE one of the Chuckle Brothers." (true Story)

9. Only once or twice, they just normally got free tea and coffer and a complimentary cab ride into town to kill a few hours. Simples

10. Cellphones weren't that prevalent at the millenium, not as much as they are now, so this never really came up. Two businessmen having a loud and animated conversation at the desk while holding up a family of 6 laden down with luggage would certainly qualify.

Biggest pains for us were those staying at the hotel for a small conference and dining/drinking on the country tab. they'd stay for for the a couple of days and start acting like you're their best friend. This is normally when the requests for blank VAT receipts and hookers would start up
 
2014-05-26 12:19:24 PM  

texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you


Maybe the people talking on the phone while checking in aren't doing it to be rude, but are in their third country in as many days and are on the phone trying to find out where they need to be in the morning?

The best benefit of Platinum/Diamond status at the major chains (other than the free botle of wine waiting in the room) is that no, you don't need information from me.  Everything is there in the computer, I walk in, state my name, the clerk hands me an envelope with my keycards and perhaps some meal/drink vouchers and points me in the direction of the elevator.
 
2014-05-26 12:25:06 PM  

Relatively Obscure: Don't mention the war.


I mentioned it once, but I think I got away with it.
 
2014-05-26 12:33:21 PM  

Clemkadidlefark: What's a Concierge?


The guy that bangs your mother and/or girlfriend and/or your wife while you go get drunk at the bar alone.
 
2014-05-26 12:34:30 PM  

ChicagoKev: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

Maybe the people talking on the phone while checking in aren't doing it to be rude, but are in their third country in as many days and are on the phone trying to find out where they need to be in the morning?

The best benefit of Platinum/Diamond status at the major chains (other than the free botle of wine waiting in the room) is that no, you don't need information from me.  Everything is there in the computer, I walk in, state my name, the clerk hands me an envelope with my keycards and perhaps some meal/drink vouchers and points me in the direction of the elevator.


While I have no problems with some Platinum/Diamond members, I do take issues who those who are dicks about their membership
 
2014-05-26 12:41:50 PM  

imfallen_angel: Clemkadidlefark: What's a Concierge?

The guy that bangs your mother and/or girlfriend and/or your wife while you go get drunk at the bar alone.


And don't forget to tip.
 
2014-05-26 12:43:34 PM  

KWess: Pro-tip:  If you ever go back to your room during the day to find that it's not made-up, but you wish it was, simply sit down for a leisurely dump.  That biatch will be along directly.


You're leaving out the most important part: make sure the bathroom door is open while you're doing your business.
 
2014-05-26 12:53:38 PM  

djones101: FormlessOne: Conversely, a list for hotels:

1. Actually have staff willing to do their jobs. Porters that refuse to help with luggage, coupled with cleaning staff that can't make a bed, is a waste of time.
2. Actually have a concierge capable of the job. A concierge that doesn't know anything about the area, or cops an attitude when asked basic questions, is a waste of time.
3. Fix problems before guests encounter them. Good hotels ensure that the remote's checked - bad hotels lose the friggin' remote and try to charge you for it.
4. Handle criticism well. Don't blow off bad reviews on Yelp, or angry customers, because, hey, fark them, right?
5. Provide adequate waste facilities. A table for trays and a wastebasket larger than a helmet ensures that the hall doesn't fill up with trash because there's no place in the room to place it.
6. Stop stealing my stuff. Sure, I may have misplaced that $2.00 plastic card used to get into my room, but your staff certainly didn't - half my wardrobe didn't get up and walk off by itself.
7. Actually ensure that what's ordered for room service shows up. I've been in more than one hotel where the order's not just wrong, but for the wrong room, and the hotel still tried to charge us for it.
8. I'll stop denying "adult features" when you stop denying bedbugs. I'm tired of hosting your guests in my house after a trip. You pay for cleaning & fumigation, I'll pay for Big Booty Bombshells 3. Deal?
9. Ensure that my room's ready on check-in. There's nothing worse than standing in the lobby, with my luggage, for an hour while you hurriedly mop up jizz after the last "guest".
10. Likewise. When I'm checking in, stop answering the goddamned phone and complete the process - check-in shouldn't take 45 minutes because you have better things to do.

This, especially 9.  We drive to our destinations rather than fly (its a hell of a lot cheaper, even cross-country).  We also tend to drive at night, since we have an 18-month-old that doesn't handle car rides very well unless he's sleeping.  So when I arrive exhausted at noon at your hotel, surviving on the last dregs of my 8th coffee, do me a favor and have my room ready.  I've NEVER seen housekeeping tending ANY room past noon, so you can't tell me a room isn't available.  Your parking lot has, what, 10 cars in it?  I know at least 4 of those are staff.  Don't feed me a line that no rooms are available until 4 pm.  Give me my farking room key and then go back to browsing Facebook.


Some hotels are good about getting you a room for early check in. I was working CES one year, and My company put us up in Mandalay Bay, and they had no problem setting me up with a room at 11 AM after I came on Sunday morning via an early flight.
 
2014-05-26 12:57:44 PM  

Stantz: 8. "So you didn't order that movie? According to the computer records, you watched that film for 20 minutes before turning it off. I don't care if you ARE one of the Chuckle Brothers." (true Story)


That's nearly as disturbing for my imagination as the spitroasting of Wee Jimmy Krankie.
 
2014-05-26 01:08:33 PM  

Clemkadidlefark: What's a Concierge?


"A concierge is the Winnipeg equivalent of a geisha. This is a woman who has been trained in the fine art of fanciness and pleasure. And when you meet one, it is intoxicating. Just what the doctor ordered."

www.hotelchatter.com
 
2014-05-26 01:15:14 PM  
I think there's been a rape up there!
thefunniestvideos.com
/get their attention.
//sometimes the complaints will be false!
 
2014-05-26 01:21:13 PM  

Nowhereman: Average view time of a non theatrical? 8 minutes.


Is that just the first 8 minutes or total?
 
2014-05-26 01:26:14 PM  

FormlessOne: Conversely, a list for hotels:

1. Actually have staff willing to do their jobs. Porters that refuse to help with luggage, coupled with cleaning staff that can't make a bed, is a waste of time.
2. Actually have a concierge capable of the job. A concierge that doesn't know anything about the area, or cops an attitude when asked basic questions, is a waste of time.
3. Fix problems before guests encounter them. Good hotels ensure that the remote's checked - bad hotels lose the friggin' remote and try to charge you for it.
4. Handle criticism well. Don't blow off bad reviews on Yelp, or angry customers, because, hey, fark them, right?
5. Provide adequate waste facilities. A table for trays and a wastebasket larger than a helmet ensures that the hall doesn't fill up with trash because there's no place in the room to place it.
6. Stop stealing my stuff. Sure, I may have misplaced that $2.00 plastic card used to get into my room, but your staff certainly didn't - half my wardrobe didn't get up and walk off by itself.
7. Actually ensure that what's ordered for room service shows up. I've been in more than one hotel where the order's not just wrong, but for the wrong room, and the hotel still tried to charge us for it.
8. I'll stop denying "adult features" when you stop denying bedbugs. I'm tired of hosting your guests in my house after a trip. You pay for cleaning & fumigation, I'll pay for Big Booty Bombshells 3. Deal?
9. Ensure that my room's ready on check-in. There's nothing worse than standing in the lobby, with my luggage, for an hour while you hurriedly mop up jizz after the last "guest".
10. Likewise. When I'm checking in, stop answering the goddamned phone and complete the process - check-in shouldn't take 45 minutes because you have better things to do.


This can't be stressed enough. If check-in time is in the morning and check-out is in the afternoon, they have plenty of time to clean the room.
 
2014-05-26 01:36:42 PM  
37.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-05-26 01:47:35 PM  

texdent: Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.

What about adverbs?


What about "over-exaggerate"?  When did that become a word?  And what's the difference between exaggerating a problem and over-exaggerating it?
 
2014-05-26 01:58:14 PM  

farkeruk: Stantz: 8. "So you didn't order that movie? According to the computer records, you watched that film for 20 minutes before turning it off. I don't care if you ARE one of the Chuckle Brothers." (true Story)

That's nearly as disturbing for my imagination as the spitroasting of Wee Jimmy Krankie.


I've met Jimmy Krankie as well. Surprisingly nice arse

That's confused the hell out of our American friends
 
2014-05-26 02:09:07 PM  

Relatively Obscure: Don't mention the war.


I did once, but I think I got away with it!

Que?
 
2014-05-26 02:17:00 PM  

great_tigers: Last shaved my balls a few trips back as soon as I got into the room. Then discovered a very slow drain in the shower. The cleaning staff must have been pissed.

Let's make that #11.


I've worked just about all positions in a hotel (take that as you may) and pubes were definitely the worst part of the job...as a housekeeper.
 
2014-05-26 02:29:03 PM  

ciberido: texdent: Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.

What about adverbs?

What about "over-exaggerate"?  When did that become a word?  And what's the difference between exaggerating a problem and over-exaggerating it?


Over-exaggerating is the same as hyperbolifiyng.
 
2014-05-26 03:02:38 PM  
Hotel's really need to be a bit more flexible about check in time. If you arrive at 8am off of a 12 hour flight, where the hell are you supposed to go until 3pm?! Most places are fairly reasonable and will at least call to see if the room is ready (which it almost always is), but Europe seems to be the worst. One time I came back at 2:45 and check in time was 3. The desk still insisted that the room was not ready, but miraculously in 15 min the room would be cleaned and ready to go. We had to make a scene and then he called up, found out the room had been ready and graciously let us check in 10 min early.

Maybe hotels need to manage their rooms better and have a room you booked several months in advance be ready when you get there early.
 
2014-05-26 03:14:30 PM  

Chimpasaurus: Maybe hotels need to manage their rooms better and have a room you booked several months in advance be ready when you get there early.


What happens when they were booked solid the night before, and everybody wanted a late check out?

The maids can only clean so fast.
 
2014-05-26 03:18:01 PM  

Gunderson: I guess accidentally killing the hooker in the bathroom doesn't rate high enough.


Also, shooting yourself in the head and getting brain matter on the mirror will usually get you kicked out of the place


fark off, it's not like you were going to pay for the room.
 
2014-05-26 03:29:17 PM  

BizarreMan: Chimpasaurus: Maybe hotels need to manage their rooms better and have a room you booked several months in advance be ready when you get there early.

What happens when they were booked solid the night before, and everybody wanted a late check out?

The maids can only clean so fast.


Wanting a ltco and getting are 2 different things. Don't approve ltco on a big turn day. If you've got 550 out and 750 in, at 99 percent occupancy, sorry gotta vacate
 
2014-05-26 03:30:08 PM  

theflatline: However, when he got home to Bogota, there was a package from Marriot.  It was a video camera with a letter thanking him for his work and the hotel staff had been instructed on how they hotel should be cleaned, and they asked him to bring the video camera with him whenever he stayed in one of their properties so he could post videos on their hotels failings with his funny commentaries.


That *is* classy.
 
2014-05-26 03:41:50 PM  
Hmm can we biatch about hotel staff here while we're at it?

What about the time I had the Do Not Disturb sign out at 8:30am after checking in at 1am and already getting a late check out,  and the maid starts knocking on the door to see if anybody is in there.
 
2014-05-26 03:48:28 PM  

KWess: Pro-tip:  If you ever go back to your room during the day to find that it's not made-up, but you wish it was, simply sit down for a leisurely dump.  That biatch will be along directly.


That will certainly build goodwill.
 
2014-05-26 04:39:19 PM  

BizarreMan: Chimpasaurus: Maybe hotels need to manage their rooms better and have a room you booked several months in advance be ready when you get there early.

What happens when they were booked solid the night before, and everybody wanted a late check out?

The maids can only clean so fast.


Then they should say that. It's not like people are not understanding, but if they don't give them a valid reason (that is plausible) why the fark no room is ready although plenty of guests should have left five hours ago, they can't expect their guests not to think they are incompetent bastards.
(It's the same with train services. If they just tell the people that the train's going to be late without the reason, of course people are going to assume they are just farking around and not doing their work properly.)
 
2014-05-26 04:49:09 PM  

FormlessOne: Conversely, a list for hotels:

1. Actually have staff willing to do their jobs. Porters that refuse to help with luggage, coupled with cleaning staff that can't make a bed, is a waste of time.
2. Actually have a concierge capable of the job. A concierge that doesn't know anything about the area, or cops an attitude when asked basic questions, is a waste of time.
3. Fix problems before guests encounter them. Good hotels ensure that the remote's checked - bad hotels lose the friggin' remote and try to charge you for it.
4. Handle criticism well. Don't blow off bad reviews on Yelp, or angry customers, because, hey, fark them, right?
5. Provide adequate waste facilities. A table for trays and a wastebasket larger than a helmet ensures that the hall doesn't fill up with trash because there's no place in the room to place it.
6. Stop stealing my stuff. Sure, I may have misplaced that $2.00 plastic card used to get into my room, but your staff certainly didn't - half my wardrobe didn't get up and walk off by itself.
7. Actually ensure that what's ordered for room service shows up. I've been in more than one hotel where the order's not just wrong, but for the wrong room, and the hotel still tried to charge us for it.
8. I'll stop denying "adult features" when you stop denying bedbugs. I'm tired of hosting your guests in my house after a trip. You pay for cleaning & fumigation, I'll pay for Big Booty Bombshells 3. Deal?
9. Ensure that my room's ready on check-in. There's nothing worse than standing in the lobby, with my luggage, for an hour while you hurriedly mop up jizz after the last "guest".
10. Likewise. When I'm checking in, stop answering the goddamned phone and complete the process - check-in shouldn't take 45 minutes because you have better things to do.


1) The majority of my coworkers are more than happy to do their jobs, and several of us do many jobs.  Just like an any industry, there are a few bad apples.
2) The concierge is there to help you, I agree, and it doesn't help them to have an attitude.  As long as you understand there are things they can and cannot do, they are most often helpful.  I work in select service and sometimes you have to play front desk associate, restaurant associate, concierge, maintenance, etc all at the same time.
3) Each one of our rooms is checked by either our housekeeping supervisor or a member of the management team.  There are many hotels that do not follow that process.  A hotel is a large house-there are bound to be problems that pop up and while they can be foreseen, the exact moment they happen is not always foreseeable.
4) Criticism in any occupation or life in general can be tough to take.  It's especially tough when people think you did something on purpose, or you ruined their whole trip because they didn't get all the requests they wanted.  I take a personal interest when I mess up and try to make it right.
5) I agree.  Hotels do need larger wastebaskets.
6) Most hotel workers are honest, hardworking people.  If they weren't, they wouldn't be in the position they are in.  Management has to trust you are going into occupied rooms, making sure the housekeeper did his/her job, and then walking out.  If items were disappearing, it's pretty easy to track a pattern and find out who is responsible.  We also have the ability to read key locks to see whose key has been used and when.
7) We don't have room service, so I can't speak to that.  But it goes to the general feeling-if you (as the hotel) mess it up, fix it and move on.
8) We no longer have pay per view or adult movies because people were asking us to remove them from their bill.  It became easier to not have them and not get pressured.
9) If you come in after the posted check in time, by all means there should be a room available and ready for you to occupy it.  Like I said earlier, our housekeeping supervisor or a member of management checks each room daily in order to catch any issues before you are in the room.  Our housekeeping staff starts at 8:30a, so if you are coming in at 8a and we have sold out the night before, I am not able to get you into a clean room.  Our posted check out time is 12p, so our guests have been promised their room until that time.  If they choose to stay in their room until noon and are not causing an issue, I have no right to ask them to leave.  On nights we are not sold out, I am more than happy to call our housekeeping supervisor and see if anything is available at the time you are trying to check in--if nothing is available yet, I ask how long it will be and depending on the answer from the housekeeping supervisor, offer breakfast while they wait, or ask if we can hold their bags while they go to their meeting/shopping/etc.  I also try to take a phone number so I may call them when a room is available for them.  Sometimes, while rooms may be available, it may not be the room you requested--for example, a room with a king bed is available at that moment but you have book a room with 2 double beds.  I will offer the king if we have the room available to sell and you need a room right now.  My best advice is to call a half hour or so before you arrive at the hotel.  At that time, the Front Desk will be able to give you a more accurate picture of what the wait may be, and if they take the initiative, can call the housekeeping supervisor to let him/her know you are coming and to have a room available in a half hour for you.
10) A person in front of me always takes precedence over a ringing phone, however, it can be frustrating to both associate and guest when you are trying to talk over a ringing phone.  No, the check in process should not take 45 minutes.  The associate should say something like "excuse me for a moment", answer the phone and ask the caller if they can be placed on a  brief hold, and then come back to the guest at the desk.  There have been several times when people have tried to tell me they just have a quick question that turns into several questions.
 
2014-05-26 05:14:00 PM  
CSB time:

Back in the days when I played music for a living we were in some small town & I got a call in my room about 10:30 am. Thinking it was our guitar player (a good friend) I answered with "Who the fark are you, what the fark do you want & why the fark are you bothering me?!?"

Dead silence.

Oops.... "Hello?"

"This is the maid, wanting to know if you want room service"

I launched into massive & profuse apologies (they hadn't called the previous 2-3 days) to no avail. They didn't come near my room for the rest of the week.
 
2014-05-26 06:18:37 PM  
That was an amazingly weak list. I'm sure any farker worth half a damn could do 10 ridiculously heinous things in any hotel that would put every item on that list to shame.
 
2014-05-26 06:51:32 PM  

dpaul007: Why would anyone order hotel porn in the first place when they have the internets?

If you're THAT ashamed of the front desk clerk knowing you busted a nut, use Porn Hub, a private browser and 12 proxies.

Protip: the hotel staff doesn't care. If you start making a big deal out of it? Streisand Effect.


perhaps they're not traveling with a laptop/tablet... though why anyone would do such a thing is beyond me.
 
2014-05-26 08:46:16 PM  

imfallen_angel: Clemkadidlefark: What's a Concierge?

The guy that bangs your mother and/or girlfriend and/or your wife while you go get drunk at the bar alone.


Travelling with your mother, your wife,  and your girlfriend on the same trip? You're a braver man than I, sir.
 
2014-05-26 08:48:29 PM  
I don't know why you would deny watching a XXX movie, it doesn't even have real porn.

whatculture.com

/he was better in Pitch Black anyway
 
2014-05-26 08:57:00 PM  

The_Original_Roxtar: dpaul007: Why would anyone order hotel porn in the first place when they have the internets?

If you're THAT ashamed of the front desk clerk knowing you busted a nut, use Porn Hub, a private browser and 12 proxies.

Protip: the hotel staff doesn't care. If you start making a big deal out of it? Streisand Effect.

perhaps they're not traveling with a laptop/tablet... though why anyone would do such a thing is beyond me.


I did once stay at a mom-and-pop place in SD where the manager told me that although they offered free wireless in the rooms, there were filters to discourage certain non-guests from taking advantage of the signal to watch "inappropriate material." A couple of days later I clicked on a link to a Cosmo article and found it blocked, though Fark was fine. Go figure.
 
2014-05-26 09:24:51 PM  

Chimpasaurus: One time I came back at 2:45 and check in time was 3. The desk still insisted that the room was not ready, but miraculously in 15 min the room would be cleaned and ready to go. We had to make a scene and then he called up, found out the room had been ready and graciously let us check in 10 min early.


You HAD to make a scene?

Sitting quietly in the lobby for fifteen goddamn minutes wasn't an option for some reason?
 
2014-05-26 09:48:32 PM  

Lydia_C: The_Original_Roxtar: dpaul007: Why would anyone order hotel porn in the first place when they have the internets?

If you're THAT ashamed of the front desk clerk knowing you busted a nut, use Porn Hub, a private browser and 12 proxies.

Protip: the hotel staff doesn't care. If you start making a big deal out of it? Streisand Effect.

perhaps they're not traveling with a laptop/tablet... though why anyone would do such a thing is beyond me.

I did once stay at a mom-and-pop place in SD where the manager told me that although they offered free wireless in the rooms, there were filters to discourage certain non-guests from taking advantage of the signal to watch "inappropriate material." A couple of days later I clicked on a link to a Cosmo article and found it blocked, though Fark was fine. Go figure.


Our hospital blocks Fark. That was painful when my wife spent a long weekend there.
 
2014-05-26 10:16:56 PM  

poot_rootbeer: Chimpasaurus: One time I came back at 2:45 and check in time was 3. The desk still insisted that the room was not ready, but miraculously in 15 min the room would be cleaned and ready to go. We had to make a scene and then he called up, found out the room had been ready and graciously let us check in 10 min early.

You HAD to make a scene?

Sitting quietly in the lobby for fifteen goddamn minutes wasn't an option for some reason?


This is why Europe hates us.
 
2014-05-26 10:43:46 PM  
Ha ha ha. Yeah, now shut up and clean up my room. It's a frickin' mess, I tell you.
 
2014-05-26 10:50:19 PM  
www.photographersgallery.com
Amateurs!
 
2014-05-26 11:07:47 PM  

BizarreMan: Talking on the phone while being being waited on by a cashier, desk clerk, anyone is damn rude and needs to be stomped.  Unless the call is specifically related to the transaction in question it should be put on hold.


Even if it's related, you get out of the way so that other people can be helped and you resume the transaction after you've ended the call. There's no need to be on the phone while face-to-face with a clerk.
 
2014-05-26 11:11:33 PM  

lindalouwho: texdent: lindalouwho: texdent: DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.

That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.

"Would you please hold? I have a customer in front of me who I'm in the process of checking in/out."

That's what I tried to do anyways, but then they'll keep calling back just getting angrier in the process.

Entitled impatient jerks.


Yes. As are the folks standing there in-person. You're getting closer to understanding the dilemma.
 
2014-05-26 11:18:47 PM  

poot_rootbeer: Chimpasaurus: One time I came back at 2:45 and check in time was 3. The desk still insisted that the room was not ready, but miraculously in 15 min the room would be cleaned and ready to go. We had to make a scene and then he called up, found out the room had been ready and graciously let us check in 10 min early.

You HAD to make a scene?

Sitting quietly in the lobby for fifteen goddamn minutes wasn't an option for some reason?


Obviously, as his favorite porn film was going to be over at 3.  Good thing they did let him in, it left him with 7 minutes to relax afterwards, before his 3 o'clock meeting.  His time is very precious.
 
2014-05-26 11:27:48 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: lindalouwho: texdent: lindalouwho: texdent: DrBrownCow: texdent: As someone who has worked in hotels before, yes don't talk on your cell while checking in! We need information from you

OK, just as soon as the front desk workers stop answering the phone when I'm trying to check in.

/I don't really talk on the phone during transactions.

That really can't be helped especially if you're the only one at the front desk and the hotels I've worked at want you to get the phone by the third ring.

"Would you please hold? I have a customer in front of me who I'm in the process of checking in/out."

That's what I tried to do anyways, but then they'll keep calling back just getting angrier in the process.

Entitled impatient jerks.

Yes. As are the folks standing there in-person. You're getting closer to understanding the dilemma.


I became a chef instead of wait staff for a reason.
I kind of admire people who have the ability to suffer fools with patience.
At least we got to say "f*ck" with impunity in the kitchen.

Bless you.
 
2014-05-26 11:45:15 PM  

Jument: That was an amazingly weak list. I'm sure any farker worth half a damn could do 10 ridiculously heinous things in any hotel that would put every item on that list to shame.


To be fair, the list focuses on actions that are legal, aren't necessarily motivated by malice, and happen regularly.   Although, denying the use of pay per view movies could be considered theft, and threatening a bad review to get your way can fall under extortion.
 
GCD
2014-05-26 11:47:22 PM  
I strive to be a good hotel guest. I do things like place all my dirty, used towels in the tub for pick up...I strip the bed of I want it changed or if I'm checking out. I've tied up the garbage bags if I felt it was appropriate to do so.

And then this past weekend, I was the guest from Hell.

Went out to a concert with the Mrs. and got back late-ish.

Unbeknown to us, the kid brought home some norovirus from daycare. He stayed unaffected. Us, not so much.

She gets sick. Violently sick. Followed by me getting even sicker than her.

We managed to score some Gravol, which turns me into a zombie. That shiat is bad news for me.

So, we pass out. Checkout is at 11am. Wife sets alarm for 10:45am. Alarm goes off and then the tornado of two sick people on Gravol trying to get out the door in 15 minutes starts.

It was bad. Really bad. I felt bad. I think I tipped. I can't even remember. I lost 48 hours - to Gravol! I know that we tried to keep things somewhat neat and tidy, but we both realized that after round 2, it was a futile effort.

Just brutal all around.
 
2014-05-26 11:50:29 PM  

poot_rootbeer: Chimpasaurus: One time I came back at 2:45 and check in time was 3. The desk still insisted that the room was not ready, but miraculously in 15 min the room would be cleaned and ready to go. We had to make a scene and then he called up, found out the room had been ready and graciously let us check in 10 min early.

You HAD to make a scene?

Sitting quietly in the lobby for fifteen goddamn minutes wasn't an option for some reason?


No, we had been waiting for 6.5 hrs and had been up since 3 am. So, yes when the old man couldn't budge for 15 min, I made a big deal about it. The maid was not going to use those 15 min to clean the room. She had done that hrs ago.
 
2014-05-26 11:55:07 PM  

italie: poot_rootbeer: Chimpasaurus: One time I came back at 2:45 and check in time was 3. The desk still insisted that the room was not ready, but miraculously in 15 min the room would be cleaned and ready to go. We had to make a scene and then he called up, found out the room had been ready and graciously let us check in 10 min early.

You HAD to make a scene?

Sitting quietly in the lobby for fifteen goddamn minutes wasn't an option for some reason?

This is why Europe hates us.


Most of the world thinks they hate Americans, but in fact they are just saddened by their 2nd and 3rd world existences where it costs $12 /lb for meat. For the record, I spoke the language of the country in question (not English).
 
2014-05-27 12:25:21 AM  

Iggie: [37.media.tumblr.com image 500x269]


Did they misbehave?
 
2014-05-27 03:13:35 AM  

nulluspixiusdemonica: Thunderbox: I first heard ' ponce ' ( also ' poncin about ' e.g.  Why's he poncin' about while there's work to be done ? )

You *can* "ponce about" or "ponce around", but you cannot "ponce".

Unless you're subby, in which case go wild


Nope.  That is a direct quote, and perfectly cromulent.
 
2014-05-27 05:40:44 AM  
My word, what hotels are you people staying in?? Either I've never encountered  these things, or they were so minor that it just didn't register in my mind.
 
2014-05-27 07:43:29 AM  

Chimpasaurus: italie: poot_rootbeer: Chimpasaurus: One time I came back at 2:45 and check in time was 3. The desk still insisted that the room was not ready, but miraculously in 15 min the room would be cleaned and ready to go. We had to make a scene and then he called up, found out the room had been ready and graciously let us check in 10 min early.

You HAD to make a scene?

Sitting quietly in the lobby for fifteen goddamn minutes wasn't an option for some reason?

This is why Europe hates us.

Most of the world thinks they hate Americans, but in fact they are just saddened by their 2nd and 3rd world existences where it costs $12 /lb for meat. For the record, I spoke the language of the country in question (not English).



...and I bet you came across just as likable in that language too...
 
2014-05-27 07:55:30 AM  

Delta1212: nulluspixiusdemonica: " you ponce in here expecting to be waited on hand and foot "

When did ponce get the verb upgrade?

All nouns have become verbs, all adjectives have become nouns and the verbs have all been shot.


Damn! Really got to get me a copy of the latest Newspeak dictionary! I'm behind the times!
 
2014-05-27 08:01:10 AM  

Smackledorfer: farkeruk: BizarreMan: Talking on the phone while being being waited on by a cashier, desk clerk, anyone is damn rude and needs to be stomped.  Unless the call is specifically related to the transaction in question it should be put on hold.

I'm going to start getting violent on these people. I've already telling the person next to me a made-up obscene story that the woman in front of me and her caller are going to hear loudly, just to piss them off (and 9 times out of 10, it's a woman). In a few cases, they've given me a "how dare you" response when they rapidly put the phone down, but it's not enough.

I've had a few occassions where I'm about to be served and a client rings, and I just drop my place in the queue. You've got voicemail, people. View it like if you're taking a dump, or mid-coitus. Unless you're a doctor on call, you have no excuse.

Call me while I am on the shiatter at your own risk. I'm answering that shiat.



Yup. Makes me giggle like a school girl to flush the toilet while I'm on the phone with someone.

/ Not proud.
 
2014-05-27 08:28:11 AM  

GCD: I strive to be a good hotel guest. I do things like place all my dirty, used towels in the tub for pick up...I strip the bed of I want it changed or if I'm checking out. I've tied up the garbage bags if I felt it was appropriate to do so.

And then this past weekend, I was the guest from Hell.

Went out to a concert with the Mrs. and got back late-ish.

Unbeknown to us, the kid brought home some norovirus from daycare. He stayed unaffected. Us, not so much.

She gets sick. Violently sick. Followed by me getting even sicker than her.

We managed to score some Gravol, which turns me into a zombie. That shiat is bad news for me.

So, we pass out. Checkout is at 11am. Wife sets alarm for 10:45am. Alarm goes off and then the tornado of two sick people on Gravol trying to get out the door in 15 minutes starts.

It was bad. Really bad. I felt bad. I think I tipped. I can't even remember. I lost 48 hours - to Gravol! I know that we tried to keep things somewhat neat and tidy, but we both realized that after round 2, it was a futile effort.

Just brutal all around.


Sounds like a shiatfest!
 
2014-05-27 09:25:06 AM  

HandleWithCare: FormlessOne: Conversely, a list for hotels:

1. Actually have staff willing to do their jobs. Porters that refuse to help with luggage, coupled with cleaning staff that can't make a bed, is a waste of time.
2. Actually have a concierge capable of the job. A concierge that doesn't know anything about the area, or cops an attitude when asked basic questions, is a waste of time.
3. Fix problems before guests encounter them. Good hotels ensure that the remote's checked - bad hotels lose the friggin' remote and try to charge you for it.
4. Handle criticism well. Don't blow off bad reviews on Yelp, or angry customers, because, hey, fark them, right?
5. Provide adequate waste facilities. A table for trays and a wastebasket larger than a helmet ensures that the hall doesn't fill up with trash because there's no place in the room to place it.
6. Stop stealing my stuff. Sure, I may have misplaced that $2.00 plastic card used to get into my room, but your staff certainly didn't - half my wardrobe didn't get up and walk off by itself.
7. Actually ensure that what's ordered for room service shows up. I've been in more than one hotel where the order's not just wrong, but for the wrong room, and the hotel still tried to charge us for it.
8. I'll stop denying "adult features" when you stop denying bedbugs. I'm tired of hosting your guests in my house after a trip. You pay for cleaning & fumigation, I'll pay for Big Booty Bombshells 3. Deal?
9. Ensure that my room's ready on check-in. There's nothing worse than standing in the lobby, with my luggage, for an hour while you hurriedly mop up jizz after the last "guest".
10. Likewise. When I'm checking in, stop answering the goddamned phone and complete the process - check-in shouldn't take 45 minutes because you have better things to do.

1) The majority of my coworkers are more than happy to do their jobs, and several of us do many jobs.  Just like an any industry, there are a few bad apples.
2) The concierge is there to help you, I a ...


...trying to figure out if you're apologizing for a particular hotel, or just hotels in general. I've personally experienced all 10 of the issues I've posted - I'm glad you know of a hotel at which I may not experience those 10 issues, but, unfortunately, I've experienced them often enough to not buy into the "it's an isolated incident" canard.
 
2014-05-27 08:47:04 PM  
I'm always glad when the hotel leave a few extra trash can liners. So when I change my diapers I can wrap the dirty one in something for easier handling.
 
2014-05-27 11:00:39 PM  

The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves: I'm always glad when the hotel leave a few extra trash can liners. So when I change my diapers I can wrap the dirty one in something for easier handling.


You wear adult diapers, and you hold onto the dirty ones after they have been " soiled"?
 
2014-05-27 11:13:59 PM  

schoolbread: The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves: I'm always glad when the hotel leave a few extra trash can liners. So when I change my diapers I can wrap the dirty one in something for easier handling.

You wear adult diapers, and you hold onto the dirty ones after they have been " soiled"?


No you put them in the trash but you wrap them in something first.
 
Displayed 160 of 160 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report