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(Chicago Trib)   Those TSA full-body scanners designed to protect airports that were pulled out because people were too sensitive? They're now being used in prisons to ensure prisoners aren't possessing contraband   (chicagotribune.com) divider line 79
    More: Spiffy, TSA, prisoners, airports, convicts  
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2856 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 May 2014 at 11:50 PM (12 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-05-25 08:34:01 PM
Why is this spiffy that, in the country with highest incarceration rate on Earth, they're using unwanted technology with known health risks to attack a minor symptomatic vector in a problem with an obvious causal solution?

Are you one if those jerks who thinks the legal system cares if you're innocent or not?
 
2014-05-25 08:40:06 PM

doglover: Why is this spiffy that, in the country with highest incarceration rate on Earth, they're using unwanted technology with known health risks to attack a minor symptomatic vector in a problem with an obvious causal solution?

Are you one if those jerks who thinks the legal system cares if you're innocent or not?


I kept reading that as 'casual' and thinking that full body cavity searches, the alternative to the scans, can hardly be considered casual.
 
2014-05-25 08:51:47 PM
I will miss them. I can't go through metal detectors due to an electronically sensitive medical implant, so my only other option is the pat-down, which can require a significant wait while I struggle to keep an eye on my bag which is just sitting there as other people's shiat comes through the scanner. And then I get to have some creepy old guy touch my balls. I am glad to trade that for a little radiation.
 
2014-05-25 09:04:07 PM
This...is actually a good idea.
 
2014-05-25 09:34:30 PM

revrendjim: I will miss them. I can't go through metal detectors due to an electronically sensitive medical implant, so my only other option is the pat-down, which can require a significant wait while I struggle to keep an eye on my bag which is just sitting there as other people's shiat comes through the scanner. And then I get to have some creepy old guy touch my balls. I am glad to trade that for a little radiation.


You don't want creepy old guys touching your balls?
 
2014-05-25 09:37:42 PM
How about stopping the guards who are bringing in and selling contraband?
 
2014-05-25 09:42:51 PM
"aren't possessing contraband" ?  Shall we engage in a high energy Bollywood dance number to go with that kwality phrase?
 
2014-05-25 09:56:54 PM

doglover: revrendjim: I will miss them. I can't go through metal detectors due to an electronically sensitive medical implant, so my only other option is the pat-down, which can require a significant wait while I struggle to keep an eye on my bag which is just sitting there as other people's shiat comes through the scanner. And then I get to have some creepy old guy touch my balls. I am glad to trade that for a little radiation.

You don't want creepy old guys touching your balls?


Not my first choice, but I try to make the best of it, especially if I haven't had much action in a while.
 
2014-05-25 09:57:33 PM

lindalouwho: How about stopping the guards who are bringing in and selling contraband?


Your newsletter, I would like to subscribe to it...
 
2014-05-25 10:50:04 PM

lindalouwho: How about stopping the guards who are bringing in and selling contraband?


How about not locking people up for every damn little thing?

Imagine if your doctor only gave ONE treatment, and it was a retarded one.

Headache? Leeches. Vaginal discharge? Leeches. Apendicitis? Leeches. Impotence? Leeches. Leech bites? Leeches!

That's our legal system right now. Prison is supposed to be a holding area for those awaiting trial or the gallows. It also is a handy way to keep violent, unrepentant types away from others while we decide what can be done to them to make them less dangerous. That's it.

Locking up everyone for totally different crimes commited for totally different reasons is actually dumber than the leech only doctor, because unlike prison, leeches have real theraputic value in rare cases.
 
2014-05-25 10:50:33 PM
They were pulled out?  News to me.  I went through one at Hartsfield-Jackson in Atlanta last week.
 
2014-05-25 11:28:10 PM

doglover: revrendjim: I will miss them. I can't go through metal detectors due to an electronically sensitive medical implant, so my only other option is the pat-down, which can require a significant wait while I struggle to keep an eye on my bag which is just sitting there as other people's shiat comes through the scanner. And then I get to have some creepy old guy touch my balls. I am glad to trade that for a little radiation.

You don't want creepy old guys touching your balls?



And have an embarrassing reaction in front of so many people? No thank you!
 
2014-05-25 11:29:35 PM

BravadoGT: They were pulled out?  News to me.  I went through one at Hartsfield-Jackson in Atlanta last week.



Actually, that was prison. You are now classified as an escaped felon.
 
2014-05-25 11:30:02 PM

revrendjim: doglover: revrendjim: I will miss them. I can't go through metal detectors due to an electronically sensitive medical implant, so my only other option is the pat-down, which can require a significant wait while I struggle to keep an eye on my bag which is just sitting there as other people's shiat comes through the scanner. And then I get to have some creepy old guy touch my balls. I am glad to trade that for a little radiation.

You don't want creepy old guys touching your balls?

Not my first choice, but I try to make the best of it, especially if I haven't had much action in a while.


I flew about three weeks after hernia surgery and one of the things they fail to mention is that whatever side your hernia was on - your testicle on that side is going to drop to knee level for over a month until things tighten back up.  I was still hurting and couldn't raise my hands over my head because it pulled on the stitches, so I had to get a pat down.  The TSA agent nailed my right nut since it was halfway down my leg even though I was wearing tight boxer briefs.  That nut just "leaked" out of any underwear I wore for two months. I flinched and immediately explained "that's what you think it is, I just had hernia surgery" and he looked at me like:

a)  I was crazy
b)  He hated his life

But he let me go.
 
2014-05-25 11:47:34 PM
revrendjim: And then I get to have some creepy old guy touch my balls.

I pay good money to have creepy old guys touch my balls.
 
2014-05-25 11:53:36 PM

BravadoGT: They were pulled out?  News to me.  I went through one at Hartsfield-Jackson in Atlanta last week.


Different tech. The article is talking about the ones that used ionizing radiation.
 
2014-05-25 11:54:25 PM

criscodisco: revrendjim: And then I get to have some creepy old guy touch my balls.

I pay good money to have creepy old guys touch my balls.


I pay good money to touch creepy old guys balls.
 
2014-05-25 11:55:55 PM
Does it detect stuff in the butt? No? Then it won't work.
 
2014-05-25 11:56:34 PM
Nice to know the facists are beta testing the public before the genpop.
Assholes.
 
2014-05-25 11:58:06 PM

doglover: Why is this spiffy that, in the country with highest incarceration rate on Earth, they're using unwanted technology with known health risks to attack a minor symptomatic vector in a problem with an obvious causal solution?

Are you one if those jerks who thinks the legal system cares if you're innocent or not?

Unwarranted.

 
2014-05-25 11:58:38 PM

doglover: with known health risks


weknowmemes.com

// Yeah, I know, don't feed them, whatever.
 
2014-05-25 11:59:08 PM

poison_amy: criscodisco: revrendjim: And then I get to have some creepy old guy touch my balls.

I pay good money to have creepy old guys touch my balls.

I pay good money to touch creepy old guys balls.


Girl, we can hook each other up.

I'm reticent to admit this, but I spent a terrifying weekend in jail, and it's amazing what people can bring in.

There was this guy who spent our time in the holding cell telling amusing anecdotes, being very animated and acting out his stories.

Then, after our scary bus ride to the county facility, we were put into a very warm holding cell together, and suddenly he loosened his jumpsuit pants and started pulling out bag after bag of pills, along wtih entire rolls of toilet paper that he had stolen from the downtown location, in an attempt to make his own pillow because we didn't get any.

I still have no idea where he his all that shiat.

Jail is horrible, but is rife with funny stories.
 
2014-05-25 11:59:34 PM
I'm too lazy to actually research this, but I came away with the impression that "we" bought millions of dollars worth of scanners for our $afety.  Then the company that made them said "No, we won't add software to get rid of the wiener images", so we wasted that money and sold it off as surplus.  Now "we" spent more money on $afety and bought all new machines that make cartoon wieners with yellow boxes instead.  Sounds like yet another Federal boondoggle.  I wonder if it's the same people cashing in?  I'm almost...almost...tempted to google this.  But, tomorrow's a holiday and I have booze to tend to.
 
2014-05-26 12:03:49 AM
Spiffy?

Fark off. WTF is up with the U.S.of Morality and it's boneheaded sense of superiority.
We live, we die, and assholes try and make money at others expense.
Or some people try and uplift humanity, in whatever small sense.
 
2014-05-26 12:06:02 AM
pusterum.dk
 
2014-05-26 12:11:16 AM

Too Pretty For Prison: I'm too lazy to actually research this, but I came away with the impression that "we" bought millions of dollars worth of scanners for our $afety.  Then the company that made them said "No, we won't add software to get rid of the wiener images", so we wasted that money and sold it off as surplus.  Now "we" spent more money on $afety and bought all new machines that make cartoon wieners with yellow boxes instead.  Sounds like yet another Federal boondoggle.  I wonder if it's the same people cashing in?  I'm almost...almost...tempted to google this.  But, tomorrow's a holiday and I have booze to tend to.


You partially have this guy to thank:

upload.wikimedia.org

Chertoff's clients have prospered in the last two years, largely through lucrative government contracts, and The Chertoff Group's assistance in navigating the complex federal procurement bureaucracy is in high demand. One example involves the company at the heart of the recent uproar over intrusive airport security procedures -- Rapiscan, which makes the so-called body scanners. Back in 2005, Chertoff was promoting the technology and Homeland Security placed the government's first order, buying five Rapiscan scanners.
 
2014-05-26 12:12:07 AM
I think they enjoyed seeing the moving pictures of my vast array of body piercings swinging around.
 
2014-05-26 12:12:39 AM

Snarfangel: BravadoGT: They were pulled out?  News to me.  I went through one at Hartsfield-Jackson in Atlanta last week.


Actually, that was prison. You are now classified as an escaped felon.


I think he was in the wrong line....


img.fark.net
 
2014-05-26 12:17:14 AM

fusillade762: Too Pretty For Prison: I'm too lazy to actually research this, but I came away with the impression that "we" bought millions of dollars worth of scanners for our $afety.  Then the company that made them said "No, we won't add software to get rid of the wiener images", so we wasted that money and sold it off as surplus.  Now "we" spent more money on $afety and bought all new machines that make cartoon wieners with yellow boxes instead.  Sounds like yet another Federal boondoggle.  I wonder if it's the same people cashing in?  I'm almost...almost...tempted to google this.  But, tomorrow's a holiday and I have booze to tend to.

You partially have this guy to thank:

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x280]

Chertoff's clients have prospered in the last two years, largely through lucrative government contracts, and The Chertoff Group's assistance in navigating the complex federal procurement bureaucracy is in high demand. One example involves the company at the heart of the recent uproar over intrusive airport security procedures -- Rapiscan, which makes the so-called body scanners. Back in 2005, Chertoff was promoting the technology and Homeland Security placed the government's first order, buying five Rapiscan scanners.


You spelled it wrong. It's "Rape-iscan".
 
2014-05-26 12:34:13 AM

TuteTibiImperes: doglover: Why is this spiffy that, in the country with highest incarceration rate on Earth, they're using unwanted technology with known health risks to attack a minor symptomatic vector in a problem with an obvious causal solution?

Are you one if those jerks who thinks the legal system cares if you're innocent or not?

I kept reading that as 'casual' and thinking that full body cavity searches, the alternative to the scans, can hardly be considered casual.


This.  I think in a prison setting, both parties would be happier with an alternative to 'bend over and spread your cheeks, while I look up your keister' method.
 
2014-05-26 12:34:16 AM

Danger Avoid Death: fusillade762: Too Pretty For Prison: I'm too lazy to actually research this, but I came away with the impression that "we" bought millions of dollars worth of scanners for our $afety.  Then the company that made them said "No, we won't add software to get rid of the wiener images", so we wasted that money and sold it off as surplus.  Now "we" spent more money on $afety and bought all new machines that make cartoon wieners with yellow boxes instead.  Sounds like yet another Federal boondoggle.  I wonder if it's the same people cashing in?  I'm almost...almost...tempted to google this.  But, tomorrow's a holiday and I have booze to tend to.

You partially have this guy to thank:

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x280]

Chertoff's clients have prospered in the last two years, largely through lucrative government contracts, and The Chertoff Group's assistance in navigating the complex federal procurement bureaucracy is in high demand. One example involves the company at the heart of the recent uproar over intrusive airport security procedures -- Rapiscan, which makes the so-called body scanners. Back in 2005, Chertoff was promoting the technology and Homeland Security placed the government's first order, buying five Rapiscan scanners.

You spelled it wrong. It's "Rape-iscan".


I hear they are currently being produced in Rapeistan
 
2014-05-26 12:36:14 AM

Snarfangel: BravadoGT: They were pulled out?  News to me.  I went through one at Hartsfield-Jackson in Atlanta last week.


Actually, that was prison. You are now classified as an escaped felon.


Been that way since 2004 at least. Never thought I'd need a pat-down in my entire life.
 
2014-05-26 12:36:22 AM

ksdanj: lindalouwho: How about stopping the guards who are bringing in and selling contraband?

Your newsletter, I would like to subscribe to it...


Yea team bust that union now
 
2014-05-26 12:40:35 AM
lack of warmth:

This.  I think in a prison setting, both parties would be happier with an alternative to 'bend over and spread your cheeks, while I look up your keister' method.

It's unlikely that would stop, they'd just use the rapescan at additional checkpoints inside.
 
2014-05-26 12:51:29 AM

fusillade762: Too Pretty For Prison: I'm too lazy to actually research this, but I came away with the impression that "we" bought millions of dollars worth of scanners for our $afety.  Then the company that made them said "No, we won't add software to get rid of the wiener images", so we wasted that money and sold it off as surplus.  Now "we" spent more money on $afety and bought all new machines that make cartoon wieners with yellow boxes instead.  Sounds like yet another Federal boondoggle.  I wonder if it's the same people cashing in?  I'm almost...almost...tempted to google this.  But, tomorrow's a holiday and I have booze to tend to.

You partially have this guy to thank:

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x280]

Chertoff's clients have prospered in the last two years, largely through lucrative government contracts, and The Chertoff Group's assistance in navigating the complex federal procurement bureaucracy is in high demand. One example involves the company at the heart of the recent uproar over intrusive airport security procedures -- Rapiscan, which makes the so-called body scanners. Back in 2005, Chertoff was promoting the technology and Homeland Security placed the government's first order, buying five Rapiscan scanners.


With a name like Rapiscan, you know you're going to need therapy afterwards...
 
2014-05-26 12:53:15 AM
It's almost as if rich people behind the prison industry buttress the prison unions who in turn bribe the politicians who finally instruct the police to enforce their draconian measures to enslave people for small matters in order to get free labor in addition to puffing up stocks.
 
2014-05-26 12:54:29 AM

Jim_Callahan: doglover: with known health risks

[weknowmemes.com image 371x383]

// Yeah, I know, don't feed them, whatever.


It's true, dumbass. I went to visit my mom in Florida this past fall and went through one of those scanners. Guess what? Two days later, I had diarrhea. On the return trip I went through one again and the f*cking ticket I printed at the airport gave me a goddamned papercut. So don't act like this is all some conspiracy FUD nonsense. Dick.
 
2014-05-26 12:56:49 AM
lol those scanners unzip your DNA strands(briefly, but still). Seriously.

But they're not bad for you!


/talking about the so called naked scanners.
 
2014-05-26 01:01:21 AM
And money was made and made again by the industry of treating humans like chattel.
 
2014-05-26 01:01:24 AM
 
2014-05-26 01:02:03 AM

walktoanarcade: lol those scanners unzip your DNA strands(briefly, but still). Seriously.

But they're not bad for you!


/talking about the so called naked scanners.


And we all know how harmless the last Scanners were.

www.silveremulsion.com
 
2014-05-26 01:03:37 AM

Danger Avoid Death: walktoanarcade: lol those scanners unzip your DNA strands(briefly, but still). Seriously.

But they're not bad for you!


/talking about the so called naked scanners.

And we all know how harmless the last Scanners were.

[www.silveremulsion.com image 400x225]


His sinus pressure is all gone, though.
 
2014-05-26 01:14:01 AM
www.documentingreality.com
 
2014-05-26 01:15:26 AM

Fart_Machine: [www.documentingreality.com image 440x382]


He's got shiatty aim.
 
2014-05-26 01:22:01 AM

Fart_Machine: [www.documentingreality.com image 440x382]


I looked at that upside down on my iPad and it looks like a ghost being mugged.
 
2014-05-26 01:22:40 AM
Hallelujah. The old way felt like I should've at least gotten a drink outta the deal first.
 
2014-05-26 01:24:25 AM

criscodisco: poison_amy: criscodisco: revrendjim: And then I get to have some creepy old guy touch my balls.

I pay good money to have creepy old guys touch my balls.

I pay good money to touch creepy old guys balls.

Girl, we can hook each other up.

I'm reticent to admit this, but I spent a terrifying weekend in jail, and it's amazing what people can bring in.

There was this guy who spent our time in the holding cell telling amusing anecdotes, being very animated and acting out his stories.

Then, after our scary bus ride to the county facility, we were put into a very warm holding cell together, and suddenly he loosened his jumpsuit pants and started pulling out bag after bag of pills, along wtih entire rolls of toilet paper that he had stolen from the downtown location, in an attempt to make his own pillow because we didn't get any.

I still have no idea where he his all that shiat.

Jail is horrible, but is rife with funny stories.


I think you need to look up 'reticent'. Openly admitting to a bunch of strangers online is not 'reticent' but quite the opposite.
 
2014-05-26 01:33:53 AM

Jim_Callahan: doglover: with known health risks

[weknowmemes.com image 371x383]

// Yeah, I know, don't feed them, whatever.



Huh?
Backscatter uses ionizing radiation.
Ionizing radiation exposure is a major risk factor for cancer.
That risk factor is a dose related risk factor. Higher dose, higher risk.

Ok, now I'll agree that the dose received is insignificant for most people and lower than the additional dose received simply by flying at altitude. For most people, it isn't anywhere near a problem. However, if you work anywhere with increased radiation (including hospitals where you constantly have x-rays and CTs being shot, even if the dose received from those is minor due to shielding, distance, and limited exposure), then I would agree with arguments that any unnecessary radiation exposure should be avoided. Full body security scanners? Security theater and unnecessary.
 
2014-05-26 01:34:41 AM
Its all gonna be shiats and giggles until prisoners develop cancer and start suing local governments for millions of taxpayer dollars.
 
2014-05-26 01:36:46 AM

lindalouwho: How about stopping the guards who are bringing in and selling contraband?


WAIT WAIT WAIT
Are you saying that the scanners should be used on EVERYONE entering the prison?
INCLUDING the people using the scanners?

WAIT WAIT WAIT


Some of the contraband is crafted goods. shivs and all that jazz.
 
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