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(STV.tv)   Scotland needs a half-million foreign workers to offset low birth rate and aging population, says immigrants will get free language lessons by interpreting racist graffiti sprayed on their cars and houses by angry, drunken, unemployed Scots   (news.stv.tv) divider line 138
    More: Obvious, Scotland, population ageing, treasuries, foreign worker, Scotland needs, private military, immigration, Office for National Statistics  
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4219 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 May 2014 at 3:05 PM (8 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



138 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-05-24 01:57:18 PM
Well, you ladies know what to do.

Start lining up for David Tennant and Craig Ferguson.

/dibs on Karen Gillian
 
2014-05-24 02:10:13 PM
shiat, where do I sign up?
 
2014-05-24 03:06:28 PM
"Yes, please.  I would enjoy a Glasgow kiss very greatly!"
 
2014-05-24 03:09:58 PM
img.fark.net
Bonjouuurrrrrr, you cheese eating surrender monkeys
 
2014-05-24 03:10:55 PM
Scotland's population is projected to age more rapidly in the future


23 year old fair Scottish maiden.

www.film.com
 
2014-05-24 03:11:26 PM
I wonder how this problem got fixed in the past? I've heard of this thing called farking, is that what they used to do?
 
2014-05-24 03:12:42 PM

Fark like a Barsoomian: I wonder how this problem got fixed in the past? I've heard of this thing called farking, is that what they used to do?


No time for that, not when there's food to deep fry and people to headbutt!
 
2014-05-24 03:14:10 PM
Um, Scotland's unemployment rate is 7.1%, which is pretty low both by UK and world standards, I think.

Reasonable to look to immigration to a degree at that point, I think.  That's about where the US's unemployment is and we do.
 
2014-05-24 03:14:20 PM
They took our jobs!

On a serious note; when I was in Ireland, I encountered maybe 3 or 4 bartenders that were Irish. The rest were immigrants. Maybe, it was because we only really went out in Dublin and didn't really go out in the smaller towns; like Kenmare.

/ the girl that drew the shamrock in my Guinness at the Guinness factory was German
 
2014-05-24 03:16:43 PM
I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?
 
2014-05-24 03:19:41 PM

zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?



depends,  do you support Rangers or Celtics?
 
2014-05-24 03:20:38 PM
Ye will ne'er be true scotsmen.
 
2014-05-24 03:23:00 PM

Slaxl: Scotland's population is projected to age more rapidly in the future


23 year old fair Scottish maiden.


If only they were all on the Rose Leslie end of the scale.
 
2014-05-24 03:27:19 PM
I graduate soon and I fully intend to look at Scotland for work as well as the U.S. I like Scotland. I hope they need health administration people.
 
2014-05-24 03:28:50 PM
I'm in. As a bonus, I even have Scottish ancestry!
 
2014-05-24 03:29:26 PM

OtherLittleGuy: Well, you ladies know what to do.

Start lining up for David Tennant and Craig Ferguson.

/dibs on Karen Gillian


David Tennant... yum. I was never into skinny guys until him.
 
2014-05-24 03:29:35 PM
Before: i1.ytimg.com

After:   i1.ytimg.com


Monty Python had the solution years ago.

www.timdrussell.com
 
2014-05-24 03:30:00 PM

zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?


You'd have to work with Scottish people. Stubborn, angry f**kers. I worked with a Scottish guy who looked like Shrek. Okay, he wasn't green and he had normal ears, but otherwise he was Shrek.
 
2014-05-24 03:30:52 PM

bingethinker: zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?

You'd have to work with Scottish people. Stubborn, angry f**kers. I worked with a Scottish guy who looked like Shrek. Okay, he wasn't green and he had normal ears, but otherwise he was Shrek.


I thought Wayne Rooney was English.
 
2014-05-24 03:31:46 PM

iheartscotch: They took our jobs!

On a serious note; when I was in Ireland, I encountered maybe 3 or 4 bartenders that were Irish. The rest were immigrants. Maybe, it was because we only really went out in Dublin and didn't really go out in the smaller towns; like Kenmare.

/ the girl that drew the shamrock in my Guinness at the Guinness factory was German


As an immigrant living in Dublin - that sounds about right.
 
2014-05-24 03:32:19 PM

zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?


Yes, you'd have to live in Scotland.

More seriously; their cost of living is much higher than here in the States. For instance; milk here is about 50 cents a liter; there, it's about $1.00 a liter. That applies to real estate, cars, beer, food, ect.

Also, not every business there takes credit/debit cards; you have to have access to cash. Plus, they eat a lot more sheep, goat and lamb than we do. They, still, are a primarily agrarian society and without the Brits; they'd(the country as a whole) be in a world of hurt, financially. Also, the majority of their cars have manual transmission and you'd need to shift left-handed.
 
2014-05-24 03:32:43 PM

zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?


It gets really really really dark in winter.
 
2014-05-24 03:34:57 PM
Scotland will solve it's population as we have in the US. Just leave your southern border open and millions of people who talk funny will move in illegally.

/I have relatives from Cuidad Carlisle
 
2014-05-24 03:35:06 PM
I hear the sheep are friendly.
 
2014-05-24 03:38:57 PM
As a guy who writes a lot of Star Trek / Scotty fan-fiction, I think I can do pretty well.
 
2014-05-24 03:40:59 PM
img.fark.netImmigration you say?
 
2014-05-24 03:42:01 PM

listernine: I hear the sheep are friendly.


Fun fact time!

While in Ireland, I saw that many sheep had giant multicolored paint splotches on them. At first, I figured it was how the determined which sheep belonged to which farmer. I soon discovered that they strap these special paint things to the chests of rams(male sheep) and then let them go out among the ewes(female sheep). The different colors of paint help the farmer determine what ram got busy with which ewe.
 
2014-05-24 03:42:05 PM

bingethinker: zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?

You'd have to work with Scottish people. Stubborn, angry f**kers. I worked with a Scottish guy who looked like Shrek. Okay, he wasn't green and he had normal ears, but otherwise he was Shrek.


I thought David Ortiz was Dominican.
 
2014-05-24 03:45:16 PM
Reads like the latest UK government scare story to encourage the 'No' vote. Will they never learn? Every time they issue one of these, the figures for the 'Yes' campaign go up.
 
2014-05-24 03:47:06 PM

listernine: I hear the sheep are friendly.


If you put them facing over a cliff when you shag them, they push back. Or so I've heard.
 
2014-05-24 03:49:31 PM

iheartscotch: listernine: I hear the sheep are friendly.

Fun fact time!

While in Ireland, I saw that many sheep had giant multicolored paint splotches on them. At first, I figured it was how the determined which sheep belonged to which farmer. I soon discovered that they strap these special paint things to the chests of rams(male sheep) and then let them go out among the ewes(female sheep). The different colors of paint help the farmer determine what ram got busy with which ewe.


Soooo, what colors do the farmers wear?
 
2014-05-24 03:49:50 PM
I worked for a year in Europe during the Wirtschaftswunder of the 70s.

Great experience but I do not know if it would be okay today.
 
2014-05-24 03:50:38 PM

Danger Avoid Death: listernine: I hear the sheep are friendly.

If you put them facing over a cliff when you shag them, they push back. Or so I've heard.


Of course! But you gotta make sure they wear blinders, or they turn sideways. That's what my cousin told me.
 
2014-05-24 03:51:51 PM
img.fark.net

The Welcome sign seems to be one of the most popular landmark in Scotland.
 
2014-05-24 03:53:49 PM

iheartscotch: milk here is about 50 cents a liter


It's about $1.50/litre in Canada

/we suck
 
2014-05-24 03:55:03 PM

iheartscotch: zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?

Yes, you'd have to live in Scotland.

More seriously; their cost of living is much higher than here in the States. For instance; milk here is about 50 cents a liter; there, it's about $1.00 a liter. That applies to real estate, cars, beer, food, ect.

Also, not every business there takes credit/debit cards; you have to have access to cash. Plus, they eat a lot more sheep, goat and lamb than we do. They, still, are a primarily agrarian society and without the Brits; they'd(the country as a whole) be in a world of hurt, financially. Also, the majority of their cars have manual transmission and you'd need to shift left-handed.


This is like any place in Europe or any major American city that has a high cost of living. What do you like about it though? Any major benefits to living in Europe versus the U.S. ?
 
2014-05-24 03:56:19 PM
iheartscotch:
More seriously; their cost of living is much higher than here in the States. For instance; milk here is about 50 cents a liter; there, it's about $1.00 a liter.

Sounds like here.

Also, not every business there takes credit/debit cards; you have to have access to cash. Plus, they eat a lot more sheep, goat and lamb than we do.

Waiting for a downside.

They, still, are a primarily agrarian society and without the Brits; they'd(the country as a whole) be in a world of hurt, financially. Also, the majority of their cars have manual transmission and you'd need to shift left-handed.

I'm okay with all of this.

/until i find out that bourbon is hard to get, then it's GAME OVER
 
2014-05-24 03:57:18 PM

iheartscotch: zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?

Yes, you'd have to live in Scotland.

More seriously; their cost of living is much higher than here in the States. For instance; milk here is about 50 cents a liter; there, it's about $1.00 a liter. That applies to real estate, cars, beer, food, ect.

Also, not every business there takes credit/debit cards; you have to have access to cash. Plus, they eat a lot more sheep, goat and lamb than we do. They, still, are a primarily agrarian society and without the Brits; they'd(the country as a whole) be in a world of hurt, financially. Also, the majority of their cars have manual transmission and you'd need to shift left-handed.


One other question: Do they drive on the same side of the road as the U.S. ?
 
2014-05-24 04:00:29 PM

4seasons85!: One other question: Do they drive on the same side of the road as the U.S. ?


No, they drive on the right side of the road.

/teehee!
 
2014-05-24 04:01:38 PM

iheartscotch: zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?

Yes, you'd have to live in Scotland.

More seriously; their cost of living is much higher than here in the States. For instance; milk here is about 50 cents a liter; there, it's about $1.00 a liter. That applies to real estate, cars, beer, food, ect.

Also, not every business there takes credit/debit cards; you have to have access to cash. Plus, they eat a lot more sheep, goat and lamb than we do. They, still, are a primarily agrarian society and without the Brits; they'd(the country as a whole) be in a world of hurt, financially. Also, the majority of their cars have manual transmission and you'd need to shift left-handed.


Scots are British.  Great Britain is composed of England, Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland.  As such, as an American, you'd be happy or not to know that the Kingdom of Scotland was the enemy during the Revolution.

It's in the citizenship exam.
 
2014-05-24 04:01:52 PM

listernine: iheartscotch: listernine: I hear the sheep are friendly.

Fun fact time!

While in Ireland, I saw that many sheep had giant multicolored paint splotches on them. At first, I figured it was how the determined which sheep belonged to which farmer. I soon discovered that they strap these special paint things to the chests of rams(male sheep) and then let them go out among the ewes(female sheep). The different colors of paint help the farmer determine what ram got busy with which ewe.

Soooo, what colors do the farmers wear?


Green, obviously. ;)
 
2014-05-24 04:05:06 PM

Slaxl: 4seasons85!: One other question: Do they drive on the same side of the road as the U.S. ?

No, they drive on the right side of the road.

/teehee!


www.joeydevilla.com
 
2014-05-24 04:10:49 PM

4seasons85!: iheartscotch: zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?

Yes, you'd have to live in Scotland.

More seriously; their cost of living is much higher than here in the States. For instance; milk here is about 50 cents a liter; there, it's about $1.00 a liter. That applies to real estate, cars, beer, food, ect.

Also, not every business there takes credit/debit cards; you have to have access to cash. Plus, they eat a lot more sheep, goat and lamb than we do. They, still, are a primarily agrarian society and without the Brits; they'd(the country as a whole) be in a world of hurt, financially. Also, the majority of their cars have manual transmission and you'd need to shift left-handed.

This is like any place in Europe or any major American city that has a high cost of living. What do you like about it though? Any major benefits to living in Europe versus the U.S. ?


Their health care is free-ish; as the money comes from taxes. The weather is actually pretty decent. Ireland is a constant 60 degrees F almost year round. They have tons of rain however. A scorching day in Ireland is 80 degrees F. My experiences were mostly in Ireland; so I can't really say what Scotland is like. It's a really nice place to visit; but, I don't know if I could live there. Most of Ireland is quieter than Kansas; and that's saying something. It, definitely, would be a nice place to retire.
 
2014-05-24 04:17:08 PM
What happens when the Immigrants get old? More immigrants? What happens when the immigrants don't assimilate, set up their own little ghettos (cough, Londonstan) and start to conflict with Scottish society?

Unlike the days of unsettled, untapped America, we can't just keep bringing in immigrants non-stop. At what point do we give up our successful, stable, tolerant, European culture based societies and just let them be turned into third world hell holes like the places these immigrants come from?

I don't accept these arguments that have to bring in immigrants just because we're getting old and few. Technology can address both (automate the hell out of everything, which is already happening and reducing the number of jobs), and there is no reason we need to keep expanding the economy just for the sake of expanding the economy. When is enough, enough? Do we keep expanding until collapse? Wipe out the National parks to grow food for the ever expanding population? Eat the Spotted Owls?

We need to work out how to stabilize at lower population levels. And the immigrants need to stay home and straighten out their own countries first. The western world cannot be the lifeboat for the rest of the world. At some point the lifeboat capsizes.
 
2014-05-24 04:17:45 PM
Weeeell, I'm already unemployed and quite drunk. I should fit in nicely.
 
2014-05-24 04:21:54 PM
mark12A: What happens when the Immigrants get old? More immigrants? What happens when the immigrants don't assimilate, set up their own little ghettos (cough, Londonstan) and start to conflict with Scottish society?

Unlike the days of unsettled, untapped America, we can't just keep bringing in immigrants non-stop. At what point do we give up our successful, stable, tolerant, European culture based societies and just let them be turned into third world hell holes like the places these immigrants come from?

I don't accept these arguments that have to bring in immigrants just because we're getting old and few. Technology can address both (automate the hell out of everything, which is already happening and reducing the number of jobs), and there is no reason we need to keep expanding the economy just for the sake of expanding the economy. When is enough, enough? Do we keep expanding until collapse? Wipe out the National parks to grow food for the ever expanding population? Eat the Spotted Owls?

We need to work out how to stabilize at lower population levels. And the immigrants need to stay home and straighten out their own countries first. The western world cannot be the lifeboat for the rest of the world. At some point the lifeboat capsizes.
 I appear to be a racist and a bigot, and possibly a scared little man.
 
2014-05-24 04:24:04 PM
Are there half a million jobs in Scotland that are available to immigrants?
 
2014-05-24 04:25:13 PM

zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?


You might get kilt.
 
2014-05-24 04:27:50 PM

iheartscotch: zarker: I wouldn't mind moving to Scotland. Is there a catch?

Yes, you'd have to live in Scotland.

More seriously; their cost of living is much higher than here in the States. For instance; milk here is about 50 cents a liter; there, it's about $1.00 a liter. That applies to real estate, cars, beer, food, ect.

Also, not every business there takes credit/debit cards; you have to have access to cash. Plus, they eat a lot more sheep, goat and lamb than we do. They, still, are a primarily agrarian society and without the Brits; they'd(the country as a whole) be in a world of hurt, financially. Also, the majority of their cars have manual transmission and you'd need to shift left-handed.


I could probably shift with my left hand, but if the pedals are reversed, eh, that might take some getting used to.
 
2014-05-24 04:36:57 PM

Purple_Jack: Reads like the latest UK government scare story to encourage the 'No' vote. Will they never learn? Every time they issue one of these, the figures for the 'Yes' campaign go up.


The truth has a unionist bias
 
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