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(Short List)   How to turn your moobs into muscle, or if you're a woman, how to look really weird   (shortlist.com) divider line 64
    More: Advice, protein powders  
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12484 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 May 2014 at 3:33 PM (44 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



64 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2014-05-22 01:54:57 PM  
Um, diet and exercise?

*rtfa*

Yeah. Is this for all the middle school boys on Fark?

Who doesn't already know this???
 
2014-05-22 02:25:33 PM  
I thought Bench Press was a no go these days with the returns being so narrowly focused on few muscle groups.
 
2014-05-22 03:03:37 PM  

vernonFL: Um, diet and exercise?

*rtfa*

Yeah. Is this for all the middle school boys on Fark?

Who doesn't already know this???


My eyes are up here.

- Titters, blushes, and adjusts D-cup moob cleavage
 
2014-05-22 03:36:19 PM  
Subby, if the women you hang with have moobs, you're a super freak. NTTAWWT.
 
2014-05-22 03:39:50 PM  
I don't know what it is but I would cover it in butter and roll around on it
 
2014-05-22 03:41:03 PM  

SDRR: Subby, if the women you hang with have moobs, you're a super freak. NTTAWWT.


I'm not dumb but I can't understand why she walks like a woman but talks like a man
 
2014-05-22 03:41:15 PM  
Yeah *THAT'S hawt


www.articlesweb.org

battlereadystrength.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-05-22 03:42:10 PM  
Heavy bag plus beer.  That's how you get rid of moobs
 
2014-05-22 03:42:18 PM  

SDRR: Subby, if the women you hang with have moobs, you're a super freak. NTTAWWT.


pbs.twimg.com

On second thought ... there's definitely something wrong with that.
 
2014-05-22 03:42:30 PM  
Can someone give me the short version? I have to be at the gym in 25 minutes.

/They moved it up a minute.
 
2014-05-22 03:43:19 PM  
Subby, look really weird? I'm a muscular lady, and all it does is allow me to flex my pecs. Considering they are DD's, I've not heard any complaints. Certainly not of them "looking weird."

/wondering is subby thinks the muscles grow on top or something
 
2014-05-22 03:43:34 PM  

ChipNASA: Yeah *THAT'S hawt


[www.articlesweb.org image 480x324]

[battlereadystrength.files.wordpress.com image 620x760]


congrats....you just turned my dick into an innie. I'm sure their clenises (cleni?) are bigger than me now
 
2014-05-22 03:44:51 PM  
Hot damn!
I want to arm wrestle those ladies :)
 
2014-05-22 03:44:54 PM  
Step one for Farker:
Get off the computer and crawl out of your mother's basement.
 
2014-05-22 03:45:03 PM  
So diet and exercise will turn a flabby fat body into a fit muscular one? Who knew?
 
2014-05-22 03:46:06 PM  
We need to start a fat acceptance movement for men. Down with the matriarchy-exercise-protein-drink complex!
 
2014-05-22 03:49:49 PM  

ReapTheChaos: So diet and exercise will turn a flabby fat body into a fit muscular one? Who knew?


I read in another thread where it causes autism. And sunspots.
 
2014-05-22 03:51:03 PM  

Typhoid: Subby, look really weird? I'm a muscular lady, and all it does is allow me to flex my pecs. Considering they are DD's, I've not heard any complaints. Certainly not of them "looking weird."

/wondering is subby thinks the muscles grow on top or something


How YOU doin'?
 
2014-05-22 03:51:37 PM  

Buck Henderson: We need to start a fat acceptance movement for men. Down with the matriarchy-exercise-protein-drink complex!


REAL MEN HAVE CURVES!
 
2014-05-22 03:54:51 PM  
Seriously? EIther mods no longer preview what they greenlight or damn near everything here is sponsored garbage now.
 
2014-05-22 03:55:18 PM  
If a male is suffering from gynocomastia, then the problem is that they have a hormone imbalance. Simply exercising and eating right may help minimize the breast size, but will not be sufficient to make them go away.
 
2014-05-22 03:56:23 PM  
I'm a little surprised not to see pushups on the list. You don't need a gym membership to shape your chest.
 
2014-05-22 03:56:23 PM  
The article had some good advice about doing the bench presses properly (I'll try that next chest/triceps day).
 
2014-05-22 03:56:44 PM  

Typhoid: Subby, look really weird? I'm a muscular lady, and all it does is allow me to flex my pecs. Considering they are DD's, I've not heard any complaints. Certainly not of them "looking weird."

/wondering is subby thinks the muscles grow on top or something


pics or it didn't happen
 
2014-05-22 03:57:31 PM  
You do all this stuff and you get muscle. You quit doing all this stuff and you get moobs. It's just that simple and why there are so many moobs these days.
 
2014-05-22 03:57:31 PM  

Kope: If a male is suffering from gynocomastia, then the problem is that they have a hormone imbalance. Simply exercising and eating right may help minimize the breast size, but will not be sufficient to make them go away.


On the bright side, they don't have to have an internet connection to see boobies. Just look down and there they are.
 
2014-05-22 04:03:44 PM  

Kope: If a male is suffering from gynocomastia, then the problem is that they have a hormone imbalance. Simply exercising and eating right may help minimize the breast size, but will not be sufficient to make them go away.


His name is Robert Paulson.
 
2014-05-22 04:03:45 PM  

InterruptingQuirk: I thought Bench Press was a no go these days with the returns being so narrowly focused on few muscle groups.


Yeah, I would avoid it. Much more effective exercises, namely the high intensity interval training of the P90x series and Insanity.

I've been going to an HIIT facility for about 6 months now, I am in the best shape of my life. 38.
 
2014-05-22 04:04:37 PM  
I can't believe this thread went this long without....

img2u.info
 
2014-05-22 04:05:28 PM  
That' s great and all - but how does a 38 year old get rid of "stubborn fat" around the midsection - you know the chub that won't go away no matter how well you eat or how much you work out because you are old now and your body wants to not be tight anymore - I am asking for a friend
 
2014-05-22 04:06:24 PM  
Work in a bakery. Hoist 50# bags of flour.
Hand kneed balls of bread all day.
Roll our baguettes. Lift trays of bread in and out of proofers and ovens all damned day.
You'll be in great shape and toned like a pro.
If you have a decent body to start with that is.
If you have one of those bean bodys, then you are still going to have a bean body.
But it will get you into the best shape you can be in and . .. . you get paid to do it.
If you ride a b icicle to work and back, it is a bonus for your ass muscles.

Trust me on that one.
I had girls 20 years my junior hitting on me.
 
2014-05-22 04:07:00 PM  

p the boiler: That' s great and all - but how does a 38 year old get rid of "stubborn fat" around the midsection - you know the chub that won't go away no matter how well you eat or how much you work out because you are old now and your body wants to not be tight anymore - I am asking for a friend


answer your question?
 
2014-05-22 04:10:49 PM  
vudukungfu:

Trust me on that one.
I had girls 20 years my junior hitting on me.


me too but I always assumed it was because they caught me licking my eyebrows
 
2014-05-22 04:14:07 PM  

Yellow Beard: vudukungfu:

Trust me on that one.
I had girls 20 years my junior hitting on me.

me too but I always assumed it was because they caught me licking my eyebrows


If I'm around girls 20 years my junior I'll be hauling around a restraining order. Maybe that will help my glutes?
 
2014-05-22 04:20:19 PM  

vudukungfu: I had girls 20 years my junior hitting on me.


Girls 20 years younger than me are how old my brain thinks it still is.
 
2014-05-22 04:21:55 PM  

GRCooper: Buck Henderson: We need to start a fat acceptance movement for men. Down with the matriarchy-exercise-protein-drink complex!

REAL MEN HAVE CURVES!


I have a knuckleball.
 
2014-05-22 04:28:18 PM  
Vera de Milo has a workout video for you! (SF 90's OTA FOX Broadcast)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9pdX_D8eHY
 
2014-05-22 04:34:39 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: I have a knuckleball.


I'd suggest ice, at least until the pain recedes.  If there currently no pain, please see a physician.
 
2014-05-22 04:40:01 PM  

Skleenar: Danger Avoid Death: I have a knuckleball.

I'd suggest ice, at least until the pain recedes.  If there currently no pain, please see a physician.


Okay. What do you recommend for a back door slider?
 
2014-05-22 05:06:18 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: Skleenar: Danger Avoid Death: I have a knuckleball.

I'd suggest ice, at least until the pain recedes.  If there currently no pain, please see a physician.

Okay. What do you recommend for a back door slider?


Depends on whose back door.
 
2014-05-22 05:15:18 PM  
It is clear to everyone that you can't convert fat to muscle, right?    I see farkers at the gym all the time trying to lose their love handles by doing those weird backwards sit-ups, when what they really need is some cardio and a salad.
 
2014-05-22 05:22:41 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: SDRR: Subby, if the women you hang with have moobs, you're a super freak. NTTAWWT.

[pbs.twimg.com image 332x400]

On second thought ... there's definitely something wrong with that.


That's a man, Baby!
 
2014-05-22 05:23:59 PM  

Typhoid: Subby, look really weird? I'm a muscular lady, and all it does is allow me to flex my pecs. Considering they are DD's, I've not heard any complaints. Certainly not of them "looking weird."

/wondering is subby thinks the muscles grow on top or something


Go on....
 
2014-05-22 05:27:59 PM  

trippdogg: It is clear to everyone that you can't convert fat to muscle, right?    I see farkers at the gym all the time trying to lose their love handles by doing those weird backwards sit-ups, when what they really need is some cardio and a salad.


Yes and no. You can't isolate where you burn fat from, but you can effectively turn fat into muscle by exercising. Cardio is great for your heart so you should definitely include it in your workout, but strength training is much more beneficial for burning fat that just cardio. Muscles burn fat even when your not using them.
 
2014-05-22 05:43:37 PM  
What is the best exercise for turning weak little girlie arms into strong woman arms? Not like those... women? above, though. Like regular strong arms that can climb things and do monkey bars and stuff. Difficulty - no gym.

Also asking for a friend...
 
2014-05-22 06:43:58 PM  

namegoeshere: What is the best exercise for turning weak little girlie arms into strong woman arms? Not like those... women? above, though. Like regular strong arms that can climb things and do monkey bars and stuff. Difficulty - no gym.

Also asking for a friend...


Try this one out:

http://www.stumptuous.com/no-weights-no-problem
 
2014-05-22 06:45:16 PM  

namegoeshere: What is the best exercise for turning weak little girlie arms into strong woman arms? Not like those... women? above, though. Like regular strong arms that can climb things and do monkey bars and stuff. Difficulty - no gym.

Also asking for a friend...


Chin ups for biceps and push ups for triceps. If you can't do a chin up, do negatives for a week or two and then grease the groove. Greasing the groove is every time you walk past the chin up bar, do one or two chin ups. You can get a cheap chin up bar at like walmart.
 
2014-05-22 06:48:21 PM  

namegoeshere: What is the best exercise for turning weak little girlie arms into strong woman arms? Not like those... women? above, though. Like regular strong arms that can climb things and do monkey bars and stuff. Difficulty - no gym.

Also asking for a friend...


hand jobs
100s of thousands of hand jobs

/sorry this is fark, I couldnt stop myself
 
2014-05-22 06:50:38 PM  

nurdgrrl: namegoeshere: What is the best exercise for turning weak little girlie arms into strong woman arms? Not like those... women? above, though. Like regular strong arms that can climb things and do monkey bars and stuff. Difficulty - no gym.

Also asking for a friend...

Try this one out:

http://www.stumptuous.com/no-weights-no-problem


Shakin_Haitian: namegoeshere: What is the best exercise for turning weak little girlie arms into strong woman arms? Not like those... women? above, though. Like regular strong arms that can climb things and do monkey bars and stuff. Difficulty - no gym.

Also asking for a friend...

Chin ups for biceps and push ups for triceps. If you can't do a chin up, do negatives for a week or two and then grease the groove. Greasing the groove is every time you walk past the chin up bar, do one or two chin ups. You can get a cheap chin up bar at like walmart.


Thank you.

namatad:

hand jobs
100s of thousands of hand jobs

/sorry this is fark, I couldnt stop myself


Mr. Namegoeshere thanks you, optimistically ;)
 
2014-05-22 06:57:06 PM  

namatad: namegoeshere: What is the best exercise for turning weak little girlie arms into strong woman arms? Not like those... women? above, though. Like regular strong arms that can climb things and do monkey bars and stuff. Difficulty - no gym.

Also asking for a friend...

hand jobs
100s of thousands of hand jobs

/sorry this is fark, I couldnt stop myself


I lol'd
 
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