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(Washington Post)   Justice Department buys $16 muffins at conferences? THIS IS AN OUTRAGE. Military contractor bills government $100 million in improper payments for employees working 100 hours a day? **crickets**   (washingtonpost.com ) divider line
    More: Asinine, military contractor, Justice Department, Fox News, muffins, academic conference, discretionary spending, scandals, private corporations  
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6489 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 May 2014 at 6:56 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-05-20 04:42:26 PM  
Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

Still feel like a smart guy? Yeah, think before you snark next time.
 
2014-05-20 04:59:06 PM  
Remember it was Northrop Grumman that was called for charging over 100 hours per day per employee.

Northrop Grumman.
 
2014-05-20 06:07:07 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

Still feel like a smart guy? Yeah, think before you snark next time.


Its just another Corporate Conspiracy to make us work even more hours during the day or pay us even less?  "So Bill, you say you worked 40 hours this week?  Well, according to the clock, you only worked 10."
 
2014-05-20 06:29:28 PM  

AirForceVet: Remember it was Northrop Grumman that was called for charging over 100 hours per day per employee.

Northrop Grumman.


images4.fanpop.com

You don't say?
 
2014-05-20 06:58:10 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

Still feel like a smart guy? Yeah, think before you snark next time.


Actually, I've never played Skyrim before.

/subby
 
2014-05-20 07:00:43 PM  
Don't worry, Joe Biden's on the case!

a4.img.talkingpointsmemo.com
 
2014-05-20 07:01:06 PM  
Let me answer this with a question.  Which group is exercising their second amendment rights better?  Perhaps they deserve that money because they are using their freedoms properly instead of challenging God fearing 'Muricans right to traditional weddings.

/That hurt to type.
 
2014-05-20 07:02:29 PM  

Pocket Ninja: I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

Still feel like a smart guy? Yeah, think before you snark next time.


I think my work has a time decompression weapon they are using on me right now.
 
2014-05-20 07:02:40 PM  
I'd like to meet a military contractor who worked even one hour a day...
 
2014-05-20 07:02:51 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.


If the government is working on something related to or inspired by Skyrim, then we know it's a waste of resources.
 
2014-05-20 07:03:20 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

Still feel like a smart guy? Yeah, think before you snark next time.


wouldn't that technically be a time expansion weapon? I mean depending on which side of the weapon you were on, either it expands real time (and you have more time) or compresses real time (takes up less time & therefore you have less time).

/theoretically
 
2014-05-20 07:03:21 PM  
Meh, I've been assured that $100 million is a drop in the bucket and it really doesn't matter if we spend $100 million on bullshiat for nebulous reasons that never quite materialize.

/ maybe we should start small and work to bigger things. For example, if we could save about a penny a page on toner for all of the reports that congress runs; I bet we could save hundreds of millions, if not billions.
 
2014-05-20 07:03:48 PM  
s.mlpforums.com

muffins?
 
2014-05-20 07:05:26 PM  
It's only waste when THEY do it.
 
2014-05-20 07:06:24 PM  

Mike_LowELL: Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

If the government is working on something related to or inspired by Skyrim, then we know it's a waste of resources.


But .... But, but; how will I ever defeat dragons IRL if the US government doesn't develop glass armor and weapons?
 
2014-05-20 07:07:30 PM  

iheartscotch: Mike_LowELL: Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

If the government is working on something related to or inspired by Skyrim, then we know it's a waste of resources.

But .... But, but; how will I ever defeat dragons IRL if the US government doesn't develop glass armor and weapons?


Well...you'll defeat dragons without giant shards of glass in your skin, eyes, hair, testicles, brain, and feet. Obvs.
 
2014-05-20 07:23:07 PM  

Kisthesky: I'd like to meet a military contractor who worked even one hour a day...


Hi how you doin
 
2014-05-20 07:23:21 PM  

maram500: iheartscotch: Mike_LowELL: Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

If the government is working on something related to or inspired by Skyrim, then we know it's a waste of resources.

But .... But, but; how will I ever defeat dragons IRL if the US government doesn't develop glass armor and weapons?

Well...you'll defeat dragons without giant shards of glass in your skin, eyes, hair, testicles, brain, and feet. Obvs.


It's called glass; but, it's really malachite. Ie. a type of volcanic glass. It makes some very powerful armor. It's the second best type of normal light armor in the game. A dragon can nom on you all day and not kill you. Unfortunately; it doesn't protect against fire or ice, unless it is specifically enchanted to do so.
 
2014-05-20 07:27:02 PM  
So since people are talking about the malfeasance... it means nobody is talking about it? You are a clever one subby.
 
2014-05-20 07:28:52 PM  
This just proves how hard military contractors work to protect freedom. While beauracrats down at city hall are growing fat on 16 dollar muffins that I can only imagine are sweet with the tears of patriots and sprinkled with the shredded US flag, these super soldiers are working day and night several times a day to defeat narco terrorists with lasers and shiat. Lasers are expensive.
 
2014-05-20 07:29:38 PM  

Pocket Ninja: and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.


Can I have a gravity gun? Please!
 
2014-05-20 07:29:58 PM  
Didn't SNL already do this sketch years ago (80s)?  I swear I remember a skit where they switched to metric hundred hour days, they merged the names of the days and a few other jokes/puns too.  Anyone else remember it?  or was it SCTV?
 
2014-05-20 07:31:19 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: Pocket Ninja: and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

Can I have a gravity gun? Please!


someone else already checked it out and they are a real sick bastard...going around pointing it at the chests of middle aged women.
 
2014-05-20 07:31:20 PM  

Pocket Ninja: ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression


Whoa now that game sounds fun! Maybe I had it all wrong and I should...

iheartscotch: it's really malachite. Ie. a type of volcanic glass. It makes some very powerful armor. It's the second best type of normal light armor in the game. A dragon can nom on you all day and not kill you. Unfortunately; it doesn't protect against fire or ice, unless it is specifically enchanted to do so.


Yeah, no, I had it exactly right. Oh well.
 
2014-05-20 07:33:19 PM  
This is of course something people should get worked up about.  But a blogger from the Washington Post whining that Fox News isn't giving it time while noting that it is on page A11?  Seriously, why isn't the Washington Post putting it on page A1?  That complaint really looks like nothing more than an attack, since the Post kind of made it an afterthought themselves.
 
2014-05-20 07:34:16 PM  
a defense contractor just bought a $750k "summer house" across the road from me last year.

I've seen them there maybe 4 times.

There's nothing wrong with that, if we give him maybe just a little bit more, he'll create some jobs instead of buying 100 year old houses on lakes and not using them.

right?
 
2014-05-20 07:37:56 PM  

iheartscotch: maram500: iheartscotch: Mike_LowELL: Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

If the government is working on something related to or inspired by Skyrim, then we know it's a waste of resources.

But .... But, but; how will I ever defeat dragons IRL if the US government doesn't develop glass armor and weapons?

Well...you'll defeat dragons without giant shards of glass in your skin, eyes, hair, testicles, brain, and feet. Obvs.

It's called glass; but, it's really malachite. Ie. a type of volcanic glass. It makes some very powerful armor. It's the second best type of normal light armor in the game. A dragon can nom on you all day and not kill you. Unfortunately; it doesn't protect against fire or ice, unless it is specifically enchanted to do so.


Malachite is no glass, and decomposes to copper oxide when heated. Dragon fire would annihilate it. But at least you won't die encased in liquid hot molten glass from one puff of the dragon. More like a black powder.
 
2014-05-20 07:39:33 PM  

Scrotastic Method: Pocket Ninja: ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression

Whoa now that game sounds fun! Maybe I had it all wrong and I should...

iheartscotch: it's really malachite. Ie. a type of volcanic glass. It makes some very powerful armor. It's the second best type of normal light armor in the game. A dragon can nom on you all day and not kill you. Unfortunately; it doesn't protect against fire or ice, unless it is specifically enchanted to do so.

Yeah, no, I had it exactly right. Oh well.


It's definitely a time killer! I've got something insane, something like 200 hours playing skyrim.

But, I've got multiple characters and the game is literally endless. My favorite part is going on dungeon crawls as a, well in WOW terms, rouge with the best bow in the game and some serious sneak abilities. The game is infinitely customizable and you can specialize in multiple things. For example, you could customize your scout in such a way that your scout wears the best heavy armor in the game.

/ yes, I have a life. Yes, I've seen the sun this week
 
2014-05-20 07:44:13 PM  

sjcousins: iheartscotch: maram500: iheartscotch: Mike_LowELL: Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

If the government is working on something related to or inspired by Skyrim, then we know it's a waste of resources.

But .... But, but; how will I ever defeat dragons IRL if the US government doesn't develop glass armor and weapons?

Well...you'll defeat dragons without giant shards of glass in your skin, eyes, hair, testicles, brain, and feet. Obvs.

It's called glass; but, it's really malachite. Ie. a type of volcanic glass. It makes some very powerful armor. It's the second best type of normal light armor in the game. A dragon can nom on you all day and not kill you. Unfortunately; it doesn't protect against fire or ice, unless it is specifically enchanted to do so.

Malachite is no glass, and decomposes to copper oxide when heated. Dragon fire would annihilate it. But at least you won't die encased in liquid hot molten glass from one puff of the dragon. More like a black powder.


It's not regular malachite. It's specially refined malachite; with magic and stuff. You don't need to worry about the whole decomposition thing. Also, dragons can blow frost instead of fire. I wasn't ready for that the first time it happened.

/ sort of like the time I took cover behind a car in Fallout 3. It didn't end well.
 
2014-05-20 07:47:41 PM  

Serious Black: Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

Still feel like a smart guy? Yeah, think before you snark next time.

Actually, I've never played Skyrim before.

/subby


The Dunmer community frowns upon your Shenanigans
 
2014-05-20 07:50:17 PM  

Mike_LowELL: If the government is working on something related to or inspired by Skyrim, then we know it's a waste of resources.


So say that now, but let's hear your tune after the Skyrim: America's Army total conversion mod comes out.
 
2014-05-20 07:50:23 PM  
"...and that the Army agency in charge of the contract did not ensure that the people performing the work had the necessary qualifications."

Actually, that's illegal.  Government agencies cannot tell a contractor how to carry out their duties; the contractor determines who is qualified or not and government cannot interfere.  The best the Government could do is either ask the contractor to do the job again right, or litigate to reclaim the spent cash.  Guess how often either of those things happen?

Contracting law needs to be overhauled; I can't believe people are OK with an uneducated contractor making 100K/year off of the public's dime, but a government employee getting paid 50K for that same job is "a parasite."   What a crazy country we live in.
 
2014-05-20 07:54:13 PM  
Skyrim?
Stewardess porn?

Epic.
 
2014-05-20 07:55:21 PM  
They're both outrageous.
 
2014-05-20 07:55:52 PM  
The geek is strong in this thread.
 
2014-05-20 07:55:55 PM  
$100 million? Nine piddling figures?

Rick Scott and the last five governors of New York (and every storefront "pharmacy" in south Florida and Brooklyn) chuckle en masse at Northrup Grumman's distinct lack of ambition.
 
2014-05-20 07:56:15 PM  

iheartscotch: sjcousins: iheartscotch: maram500: iheartscotch: Mike_LowELL: Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

If the government is working on something related to or inspired by Skyrim, then we know it's a waste of resources.

But .... But, but; how will I ever defeat dragons IRL if the US government doesn't develop glass armor and weapons?

Well...you'll defeat dragons without giant shards of glass in your skin, eyes, hair, testicles, brain, and feet. Obvs.

It's called glass; but, it's really malachite. Ie. a type of volcanic glass. It makes some very powerful armor. It's the second best type of normal light armor in the game. A dragon can nom on you all day and not kill you. Unfortunately; it doesn't protect against fire or ice, unless it is specifically enchanted to do so.

Malachite is no glass, and decomposes to copper oxide when heated. Dragon fire would annihilate it. But at least you won't die encased in liquid hot molten glass from one puff of the dragon. More like a black powder.

It's not regular malachite. It's specially refined malachite; with magic and stuff. You don't need to worry about the whole decomposition thing. Also, dragons can blow frost instead of fire. I wasn't ready for that the first time it happened.

/ sort of like the time I took cover behind a car in Fallout 3. It didn't end well.


Frost dragons?
This changes everything.
 
2014-05-20 08:08:33 PM  

golden goat: I can't believe people are OK with an uneducated contractor making 100K/year off of the public's dime,


I'm guessing uneducated means not having attended an approved university and having instead found ones way into the lowly trades.

Also, 100k minus benefits is about equal to 50k with.
 
2014-05-20 08:09:14 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

Still feel like a smart guy? Yeah, think before you snark next time.


This is excellent - not like I expect anything less - but this:

Pocket Ninja: It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots.


pushed it over the edge into masterpiece territory.
 
2014-05-20 08:09:56 PM  
The $16 muffin is as real as Reagan's Welfare queen. It's as real as Obama's $100 billion vacation.

The muffins were part of a breakfast package. It appeared on some bills as "muffins" because stupidity. Even Bill O'Reilly admitted the whole thing had been exaggerated.
 
2014-05-20 08:09:57 PM  

Shadi: Skyrim: America's Army


In Skyrim: America's Army, soldier burn dragon.
 
2014-05-20 08:11:08 PM  
What's the point of awarding contracts to your friends and political allies if you're not going to pad the books for a couple hundred mil?  Those kicks don't back themselves.
 
2014-05-20 08:11:58 PM  

Dinobot: [s.mlpforums.com image 400x400]

muffins?


That was my second thought.


My first thought was those $16 muffins cost $1 retail and $15 in donations to Darpa projects.
 
2014-05-20 08:12:18 PM  

Precision Boobery: What's the point of awarding contracts to your friends and political allies if you're not going to pad the books for a couple hundred mil?  Those kicks don't back themselves.


And don't even get them started on how hard it is to get a fund to slush itself.
 
2014-05-20 08:18:28 PM  

haemaker: AirForceVet: Remember it was Northrop Grumman that was called for charging over 100 hours per day per employee.

Northrop Grumman.

[images4.fanpop.com image 640x480]

You don't say?


Why yes, I do.

ts4.mm.bing.net
 
2014-05-20 08:18:51 PM  

Mike_LowELL: Pocket Ninja: Have you ever played Skyrim, subby? Of course you have. You know how when you get really good with a bow, you can actually slow down time when you draw it? It lets you do all kinds of crazy aiming and knee shots. Time compression --that would be a pretty handy weapon for a real soldier, wouldn't it? And maybe that's exactly what this military contractor was researching..some sort of new time compression weapon. I tell you what, subby. You can keep your $16 muffins, and I'll take the $100 million dollar time compression weapon.

If the government is working on something related to or inspired by Skyrim, then we know it's a waste of resources.


don't even get me started on their slipshod efforts at player housing in iraq
 
2014-05-20 08:23:33 PM  
Here's a clue: "ACC-RSA representatives were unable to identify a typical Northrop Grumman workweek in Afghanistan."

No kidding.

There's not a whole lot of "definitely," and a whole lot of "potentially" and "questionable" in the IG report.

What it looks like is that Northrop-Grumman needed to hire a bunch of folks for those jobs, couldn't convince enough qualified folks with degrees to run around Afghanistan chasing drug runners, and hired a bunch of guys who could mostly do the job, paying them lots of "bonus" overtime to keep them from bailing. There seems to have been one or two guys who went nuts and billed crazy overtime (the 1208-hour "week"). Well, that or one guy's ID got used for a bunch of people's paychecks for that week.

The vast majority of the $100 million seems like it came in at about $100 an hour, billed. Which seems about right for contracted labor in a war zone.
 
2014-05-20 08:31:52 PM  
Meanwhile, in my department we have to bring our own damned muffins and can only work 80 hours per pay period.

Would it kill them to provide Au Bon Pain at least in the mandatory meetings and trainings?
 
2014-05-20 08:33:10 PM  
Everyone knows that the Justice Department is a joke and so are conferences.  With the military, there's at least a chance that they're actually doing something productive.
 
2014-05-20 08:42:38 PM  
he writer wasn't trying to imply that Fox News was full of hypocrites, was he?
 
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