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(Des Moines Register)   It's bad enough that they're snatching up all our money, our real estate, and our production factories. But now the Chinese are taking all the American bourbon   (desmoinesregister.com) divider line 87
    More: Sad, Chinese, Americans, Buffalo Trace Distillery, factory, Templeton Rye, American bourbon, music production, Jim Beam  
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4367 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 May 2014 at 5:33 PM (22 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



87 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-05-17 02:12:18 PM  
wannabegenius.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-05-17 02:32:57 PM  
i just finished a bottle of blanton's... and now i find i can't get more around here. grrrr.
 
2014-05-17 02:52:58 PM  
Your politicians have sold you down the river. Now you will be forced to consume inferior bourbon and various other low quality spirits
WAKE UP SHEEPLE!
 
2014-05-17 03:25:25 PM  
This is why we can't have nice things.

Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

/water
 
2014-05-17 03:35:04 PM  

JoieD'Zen: Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.


heathen. Nothing is the appropriate dilutant for bourbon.
 
2014-05-17 03:55:03 PM  

flucto: JoieD'Zen: Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

heathen. Nothing is the appropriate dilutant for bourbon.


Disclaimer *** If you MUST use mixer.***
I spared this thread my full on rant about people that put diet coke or somesuch in decent booze.
 
2014-05-17 04:01:46 PM  

JoieD'Zen: Disclaimer *** If you MUST use mixer.***
I spared this thread my full on rant about people that put diet coke or somesuch in decent booze.


OK, I'm coming off the ledge.
 
2014-05-17 04:09:21 PM  

JoieD'Zen: flucto: JoieD'Zen: Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

heathen. Nothing is the appropriate dilutant for bourbon.

Disclaimer *** If you MUST use mixer.***
I spared this thread my full on rant about people that put diet coke or somesuch in decent booze.


What about Mountain Dew?

img.pandawhale.com
 
2014-05-17 05:15:55 PM  
Globalization is a biatch
 
2014-05-17 05:24:05 PM  
Like a Chinaman can hold his booze. Who do they think they are, the Japanese?
 
2014-05-17 05:25:01 PM  
I just went to China. The family we went to see, besides requesting good wine, wanted a few bottles of good bourbon.  They're paying 2-3 times what we're paying for it here.
 
2014-05-17 05:39:23 PM  
There are lots of good reasonably priced bourbons out there fortunately,
 
2014-05-17 05:41:26 PM  
For a relaxing time.....make it Santori time.
 
2014-05-17 05:41:49 PM  
Then, let's mark the price the hell up! But only on the export market. We can do it as an export tariff. Maybe, we can make back all of that money we owe china.
 
2014-05-17 05:43:40 PM  
Not the shiat I drink. One of the many benefits of drinking mid-shelf bourbon.

/ doesn't have the taste buds to taste much difference between the good stuff and mine
// still mother's milk
 
2014-05-17 05:44:14 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: JoieD'Zen: flucto: JoieD'Zen: Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

heathen. Nothing is the appropriate dilutant for bourbon.

Disclaimer *** If you MUST use mixer.***
I spared this thread my full on rant about people that put diet coke or somesuch in decent booze.

What about Mountain Dew?

[img.pandawhale.com image 300x188]


Only if it's Code Red or that blue kind
/Loves it with Crown Royal
 
2014-05-17 05:45:30 PM  
I wouldn't trust their bourbon made with their water.
 
2014-05-17 05:46:46 PM  
Balance of trade, anyone?
 
2014-05-17 05:47:27 PM  
I have a plan to make bourbon from melamine and lead.
 
2014-05-17 05:47:50 PM  
based on my experience last night, there is still plenty of it around


x  x
  ^
 
2014-05-17 05:48:11 PM  

JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

/water


My brother, Fred, is no longer allowed to drink my good scotch. He mixed my Walker Green with Diet Coke, blue power aid, monster energy drink and red bull.

I made him drink all of the resulting abomination when I saw what he had done. Now, I have a big bottle of *shudders* Evan Williams for when he comes over.

/ I think he may have learned his lesson on mixing scotch
 
2014-05-17 05:48:44 PM  
If you knew the chemistry of barrel aged whiskey, you would stay the heck away. Fusel oil? I'll pass, thanks.
 
2014-05-17 05:51:02 PM  
The problem of having a few billion people aspiring upwards.
 
2014-05-17 05:51:32 PM  
content.internetvideoarchive.com

"Awwwwww, America! Built by the blacks and owned by the Chinese!" -From 'The Dictator'
 
2014-05-17 05:53:56 PM  
I rarely drink bourbon.  I like rum and vodak.  So good news for bourbon makers.
 
2014-05-17 05:54:14 PM  

JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

/water


intoxicatedzodiac.com
These make good gifts. Holds its' heat microwaved or chilled in the freezer all without diluting.
 
2014-05-17 05:54:29 PM  
I enjoy a single ice cube in my scotch.

Had a great Japanese single malt recently.
 
2014-05-17 05:55:47 PM  

Pointy Tail of Satan: If you knew the chemistry of barrel aged whiskey, you would stay the heck away. Fusel oil? I'll pass, thanks.


Yeah! Aged whiskey has diHydrogen monOxide in it. You know, the nazis used diHydrogen monOxide in concentration camps. diHydrogen monOxide causes hundreds of deaths a year. It is a clear, colorless, odorless liquid that could be slipped unobtrusively into anything.

/ the government is in obvious collusion with Big diHydrogen monOxide. I think I saw Obama with some the other day
 
2014-05-17 05:56:24 PM  
Chinese fire water drill.
 
2014-05-17 05:59:57 PM  
Asians love bourbon and whiskey.
 
2014-05-17 06:07:23 PM  
Japan 1980s. Buying everything not nailed down.
Japan 1990s. Throwing themselves under trains.
China 2000-teens. Buying everything not locked up.
China 2000-20s. (wanna bet?)

Moral is : Don't Fark with the US Treasury or Federal Reserve. They sell rope. For hangings ..
 
2014-05-17 06:10:00 PM  
They're probably cutting it with lead-cadmium-malemine water and selling it back to the US.
 
2014-05-17 06:11:31 PM  

Clemkadidlefark: Japan 1980s. Buying everything not nailed down.
Japan 1990s. Throwing themselves under trains.
China 2000-teens. Buying everything not locked up.
China 2000-20s. (wanna bet?)

Moral is : Don't Fark with the US Treasury or Federal Reserve. They sell rope. For hangings ..




The Chinese are building speculative cities all on credit. This is a bubble that is going to burst soon.
 
2014-05-17 06:13:54 PM  

LeroyBourne: I wouldn't trust their bourbon made with their water.


The Chinese can't make bourbon. In order to be labeled as a bourbon, it must be made in the US.
 
2014-05-17 06:25:11 PM  

Mugato: Like a Chinaman can hold his booze. Who do they think they are, the Japanese?


Dude, Chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature.
 
2014-05-17 06:29:51 PM  

flucto: JoieD'Zen: Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

heathen. Nothing is the appropriate dilutant for bourbon.


Generally, I agree.
Exception: Booker's 120 proof.  A splash of water opens up the flavor like you would not believe.
 
2014-05-17 06:32:49 PM  

iheartscotch: Pointy Tail of Satan: If you knew the chemistry of barrel aged whiskey, you would stay the heck away. Fusel oil? I'll pass, thanks.

Yeah! Aged whiskey has diHydrogen monOxide in it. You know, the nazis used diHydrogen monOxide in concentration camps. diHydrogen monOxide causes hundreds of deaths a year. It is a clear, colorless, odorless liquid that could be slipped unobtrusively into anything.

/ the government is in obvious collusion with Big diHydrogen monOxide. I think I saw Obama with some the other day


I know I wouldn't want to drown in the stuff.
 
2014-05-17 06:34:15 PM  

CraicBaby: LeroyBourne: I wouldn't trust their bourbon made with their water.

The Chinese can't make bourbon. In order to be labeled as a bourbon, it must be made in the US.


Is China the one that made a fake NEC? As in....the whole company? Complete with marketing, IT, R&D, and distribution?
 
2014-05-17 06:35:39 PM  
How dare they buy things we sell to them!
 
2014-05-17 06:36:24 PM  

LincolnLogolas: They're probably cutting it with lead-cadmium-malemine water and selling it back to the US.


They call it "boulbon and blanch watel".
 
2014-05-17 06:37:32 PM  
This far and no farther.  The line must be drawn HERE!
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-05-17 06:39:48 PM  

txchad: For a relaxing time.....make it Santori time.


Personally I feel something is lost in the translation. Please erraborate.
 
2014-05-17 06:42:09 PM  
oh hell naw.    okay boys lock and load , no Bourbon gets past us.
 
2014-05-17 06:50:35 PM  

txchad: For a relaxing time.....make it Santori time.


Suntory whiskey just bought Jim Beam for something like $3 billion.
 
2014-05-17 06:55:54 PM  

iheartscotch: JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

/water

My brother, Fred, is no longer allowed to drink my good scotch. He mixed my Walker Green with Diet Coke, blue power aid, monster energy drink and red bull.

I made him drink all of the resulting abomination when I saw what he had done. Now, I have a big bottle of *shudders* Evan Williams for when he comes over.

/ I think he may have learned his lesson on mixing scotch


Absolutely nothing wrong with Evan Williams. It's around 5-7 years old (Maker's, for instance, is around 6), it's above 80 proof and it's cheap as hell. What more do you want?
 
2014-05-17 07:04:02 PM  

JoieD'Zen: flucto: JoieD'Zen: Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

heathen. Nothing is the appropriate dilutant for bourbon.

Disclaimer *** If you MUST use mixer.***
I spared this thread my full on rant about people that put diet coke or somesuch in decent booze.


Diet Coke as a mixer for anything is gross. I can't stand diet soft drinks.
 
2014-05-17 07:13:14 PM  

Bowen: CraicBaby: LeroyBourne: I wouldn't trust their bourbon made with their water.

The Chinese can't make bourbon. In order to be labeled as a bourbon, it must be made in the US.

Is China the one that made a fake NEC? As in....the whole company? Complete with marketing, IT, R&D, and distribution?


Yes. Somehow I don't trust that China would respect labeling laws.
 
2014-05-17 07:16:16 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: JoieD'Zen: flucto: JoieD'Zen: Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

heathen. Nothing is the appropriate dilutant for bourbon.

Disclaimer *** If you MUST use mixer.***
I spared this thread my full on rant about people that put diet coke or somesuch in decent booze.

What about Mountain Dew?

[img.pandawhale.com image 300x188]


Purple drank mix is far superior, gives a great bubbly mouthfeel and looks great next to your orange crush/Taaka pitcher.
 
2014-05-17 07:19:17 PM  

Mugato: Like a Chinaman can hold his booze. Who do they think they are, the Japanese?


Wanna know how I can tell you have never been to china ? Baiju makes Shochu look tame.
 
2014-05-17 07:28:14 PM  

LeroyBourne: JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

/water


These make good gifts. Holds its' heat microwaved or chilled in the freezer all without diluting.


Puts me in mind of sen-sens.
 
2014-05-17 07:35:09 PM  
For what's it's worth, Julian van Winkle (of the Pappy van Winkle fame) takes his bourbon with a single ice cube. Hear about with him and Alton Brown
 
2014-05-17 07:54:45 PM  
Are the Japanese letting us keep the good Four Roses again for this very reason?

(The Chinese and Japanese don't like each other, right?  Or am I way off on this whole thing?)

/questions not entirely serious
//as has been mentioned, good mid-shelves are plentiful, and will hopefully stay that way
///water/ice begrudgingly accepted, but certainly not preferred
 
2014-05-17 08:04:27 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-05-17 08:13:10 PM  

FDR Jones: iheartscotch: JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

/water

My brother, Fred, is no longer allowed to drink my good scotch. He mixed my Walker Green with Diet Coke, blue power aid, monster energy drink and red bull.

I made him drink all of the resulting abomination when I saw what he had done. Now, I have a big bottle of *shudders* Evan Williams for when he comes over.

/ I think he may have learned his lesson on mixing scotch

Absolutely nothing wrong with Evan Williams. It's around 5-7 years old (Maker's, for instance, is around 6), it's above 80 proof and it's cheap as hell. What more do you want?


It tastes like a worse Jack Daniels. It just tastes like a skunk sprayed into your mouth. If you like it; more power to ya. If I need to drink whiskey, get me some Wild Turkey. Or Bushmills. Or, even better, some Jameson.
 
2014-05-17 08:20:43 PM  

iheartscotch: FDR Jones: iheartscotch: JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

/water

My brother, Fred, is no longer allowed to drink my good scotch. He mixed my Walker Green with Diet Coke, blue power aid, monster energy drink and red bull.

I made him drink all of the resulting abomination when I saw what he had done. Now, I have a big bottle of *shudders* Evan Williams for when he comes over.

/ I think he may have learned his lesson on mixing scotch

Absolutely nothing wrong with Evan Williams. It's around 5-7 years old (Maker's, for instance, is around 6), it's above 80 proof and it's cheap as hell. What more do you want?

It tastes like a worse Jack Daniels. It just tastes like a skunk sprayed into your mouth. If you like it; more power to ya. If I need to drink whiskey, get me some Wild Turkey. Or Bushmills. Or, even better, some Jameson.


I like the Irish whiskey, too.  I don't know where that places me on the whiskey social ladder, and I don't care.  I bought a bottle of 20 year old Bushmill's when I was in Dublin and I drank it like it was Gatorade.  Wish I saved it.
 
2014-05-17 08:22:07 PM  

zerkalo: For what's it's worth, Julian van Winkle (of the Pappy van Winkle fame) takes his bourbon with a single ice cube. Hear about with him and Alton Brown


At the Woodford distillery, they recommend drinking it with an ice cube because it opens up the flavor. They also recommend ordering your whiskey neat, but with a glass of ice on the side, so you can add it a little at a time to keep from watering it down too much.
 
2014-05-17 08:34:57 PM  
No mention of Balvenie? If you like Aberlour you'll enjoy it.

/goes to get a bottle
 
2014-05-17 08:36:43 PM  

Clemkadidlefark: Japan 1980s. Buying everything not nailed down.
Japan 1990s. Throwing themselves under trains.
China 2000-teens. Buying everything not locked up.
China 2000-20s. (wanna bet?)

Moral is : Don't Fark with the US Treasury or Federal Reserve. They sell rope. For hangings ..


That's pretty much it.  The proceeds from that rope go to a very few people at the top.  The rest of us get to smell the rotting corpses.
 
2014-05-17 08:41:29 PM  

Fissile: Clemkadidlefark: Japan 1980s. Buying everything not nailed down.
Japan 1990s. Throwing themselves under trains.
China 2000-teens. Buying everything not locked up.
China 2000-20s. (wanna bet?)

Moral is : Don't Fark with the US Treasury or Federal Reserve. They sell rope. For hangings ..

That's pretty much it.  The proceeds from that rope go to a very few people at the top.  The rest of us get to smell the rotting corpses.


Well, that turned.
 
2014-05-17 08:55:26 PM  

Artificial: No mention of Balvenie? If you like Aberlour you'll enjoy it.

/goes to get a bottle


The Balvenie is very nice...highly recommended.
Laphroig is my favorite. And on the weekends, Buffalo Trace n branch water.
 
2014-05-17 08:59:38 PM  
Why are we even discussing bourbon and talking about places in uUtah and Iowa? Also the farks claiming they can do in two years what everyone else (who has been perfecting this over hundreds of years) takes Five to ten to do is pretty laughable.

that entire thing sounded like someone who knows nothing about bourbon.
 
2014-05-17 09:03:12 PM  

JoieD'Zen: flucto: JoieD'Zen: Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

heathen. Nothing is the appropriate dilutant for bourbon.

Disclaimer *** If you MUST use mixer.***
I spared this thread my full on rant about people that put diet coke or somesuch in decent booze.


I don't drink decent booze since I'm an alcoholic. Are you guys OK with the fact that I'm cutting my Evan Williams with diet coke?
 
2014-05-17 09:11:32 PM  

JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.


This is one reason I say CHINA MUST BE DESTROYED.


Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

This. They can have Old Crow and Kentucky Tavern if they're nice. Otherwise let them stick to vodka.


/water

/ ice
 
2014-05-17 09:25:03 PM  

The One True TheDavid: JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

This is one reason I say CHINA MUST BE DESTROYED.


Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

This. They can have Old Crow and Kentucky Tavern if they're nice. Otherwise let them stick to vodka.


/water

/ ice


Ice does break down to water.
 
2014-05-17 09:26:47 PM  

CruJones: There are lots of good reasonably priced bourbons out there fortunately,


But they're cheapening those. Going to No Age Statement ("NAS"), cutting some good but less advertised brands like Ezra Brooks from 90 proof to 80, adding 49% vodka to make "Bourbon - A Blend," etc.

It's enough to make a person switch to vodka like I largely have. For that all it has to do is not be nasty when cold and not give me hangovers (as bourbon often does, because what makes bourbon bourbon are cogeners).

As long as they keep importing Polish rye vodka the vodka high end is covered: I've tasted dozens of vodkas and none were better than Sobieski, "distilled from 100% Dankowski rye." That stuff is good undiluted at room temperature.

Unlike Early Times 354 Bourbon, which I bought because it's being discontinued by the local Rite Aid so they had it marked down $3.50 to $11.49. Even then I might like the used-barrel Early Times better, which runs about 10 bucks. This 354 is just too sweet and has to be at least 4 years old (NAS) but doesn't taste like it, so it gets ice. It's not bad mind you but I'm not going to give the Liquor Barn Express like $17 for it: for that I can get Old Grand-Dad BiB, which always gives me headaches a few hours later but at least I enjoy the process of poisoning.
 
2014-05-17 09:27:25 PM  

JoieD'Zen: The One True TheDavid: JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

This is one reason I say CHINA MUST BE DESTROYED.


Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

This. They can have Old Crow and Kentucky Tavern if they're nice. Otherwise let them stick to vodka.


/water

/ ice

Ice does break down to water.


Will you marry me?
 
2014-05-17 09:31:47 PM  

The One True TheDavid: JoieD'Zen: The One True TheDavid: JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

This is one reason I say CHINA MUST BE DESTROYED.


Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

This. They can have Old Crow and Kentucky Tavern if they're nice. Otherwise let them stick to vodka.


/water

/ ice

Ice does break down to water.

Will you marry me?


Perhaps.
Do you have good health insurance?
What are your views on nutrition?
How is your libido?.
Do you read real books? Do you understand what they mean?
 
2014-05-17 09:52:31 PM  
If the situation is like when I was living in Beijing a few years ago, you'd be hard pressed to find a real bottle of whiskey, bourbon or vodka.  Most liquor stores and bars/clubs serve fake bottles of Jack Daniels, Stoli, etc.   Probably the only places that really sell the real stuff are bars with the 4 store hotels and some of the higher level fancy businessman bars.

The bottles of stuff are pretty convincing down to the labeling and seals.  The taste and the resulting next day hangover and possible stomachache is something else.
 
2014-05-17 09:56:54 PM  

flucto: JoieD'Zen: Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

heathen. Nothing is the appropriate dilutant for bourbon.


Nothing wrong with a proper Old Fashioned.
 
2014-05-17 10:05:17 PM  
For relaxing times, make it Suntory time.
 
2014-05-17 10:17:06 PM  
an article about how bourbon makers can't meet global demand

oh the humanity

/prefer scotch myself
 
2014-05-17 10:43:19 PM  

born_yesterday: iheartscotch: FDR Jones: iheartscotch: JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

/water

My brother, Fred, is no longer allowed to drink my good scotch. He mixed my Walker Green with Diet Coke, blue power aid, monster energy drink and red bull.

I made him drink all of the resulting abomination when I saw what he had done. Now, I have a big bottle of *shudders* Evan Williams for when he comes over.

/ I think he may have learned his lesson on mixing scotch

Absolutely nothing wrong with Evan Williams. It's around 5-7 years old (Maker's, for instance, is around 6), it's above 80 proof and it's cheap as hell. What more do you want?

It tastes like a worse Jack Daniels. It just tastes like a skunk sprayed into your mouth. If you like it; more power to ya. If I need to drink whiskey, get me some Wild Turkey. Or Bushmills. Or, even better, some Jameson.

I like the Irish whiskey, too.  I don't know where that places me on the whiskey social ladder, and I don't care.  I bought a bottle of 20 year old Bushmill's when I was in Dublin and I drank it like it was Gatorade.  Wish I saved it.


Bushmills isn't tough to get. Most liquor stores around here carry it. It isn't terribly expensive; $20-$25 for a fifth of the entry level Bushmills. Now, what might be tougher to get are the upper grades. And some are only available in Ireland.
 
2014-05-17 11:04:55 PM  
Proof that they have no souls
 
2014-05-17 11:06:48 PM  

txchad: For a relaxing time.....make it Santori time.


That's Japan and whiskey. Not China and bourbon.
 
2014-05-17 11:09:29 PM  

wildcardjack: The problem of having a few billion people aspiring upwards.


Luckily they've only made it to "American redneck." Good wine, craft beer, fine spirits and scotch whiskey are safe for a decade or so
 
2014-05-17 11:13:18 PM  
I ran out of good booze so I'm mixing everclear with Shasta cola and a splash of imitation vanilla

/any port in a storm
//any bottle in a sober
 
2014-05-17 11:59:22 PM  
Just ship them a few cases of this type of stuff.  Oh, and make sure it contains enough lead and melamine to have a proper tang.

www.topdesignmag.com
 
2014-05-18 12:23:21 AM  

JoieD'Zen: Perhaps.

Do you have good health insurance?


Medicaid.

It doesn't have to be a legal marriage unless you're rich.


What are your views on nutrition?

I'm not against it. I've been considering trying to find somebody to move in and subject me to her dietary regime as a means of losing my 30 pounds of abdominal protrusion: I might even agree to veganism if she's a good enough cook.


How is your libido?.

So-so, but that could improve. It's hard to get libidinous spending most of my waking hours on Wikipedia and Fark.

In any case you might have to blindfold yourself or employ a glory hole. Neither would offend me: either beats beating off.


Do you read real books? Do you understand what they mean?

These days I've begun reading up on a syncretic religious movement that sprang up in Iran after the Arab/Muslim conquest and provided an ideological framework for rebellion by the Iranian rural proletariat and small freeholders against their alien overlords and coopted local magnates. Madelung (whose book is not focused on one sect but rather deals with several in chronological order) and Crone (who writes about one particular belief system) both call these rebels Khurramiyya and use the term to describe more of a tendency or broad movement; and Crone notes that even when different villages or "neighborhoods" had near-identical beliefs and rituals they weren't organized into a cohesive "church" or even federation, that when they joined together it was more like an agglomeration of village chapters than a single organization. That's all I've got so far: this material requires slow reading and occasionally looking shiat up, so I'm only 60-some pages into Crone's and I just cracked Madelung's.

This interests me because my hobby is revolutionary rumination, trying to come up with a theory and practice that might actually accomplish something. Marxism is right out (especially the Bolshevist variants), anarchism is mainly good for talking shop and smashing Starbucks, and neither have much appeal to "the broad masses" who need to believe in "something greater than themselves." That line turns my stomach too much for me to do much with it, but I hope to put some thoughts and suggestions out there as a legacy future generations of revolutionaries to refer to (if they care to).

Of course this will all become irrelevant if "Skynet" does become self-aware, but I'm hoping people ain't that stupid. And of course it'll most likely have infinitesimal impact if any, and if it survives will be more of a "a friend of a friend read something written by somebody who read something by this guy" kind of thing; but what matters is that I do something to make my 40 years of rebellion not a total waste of time, not that cliques of Davidites spring up everywhere to praise my brilliance. (That itself would make mock of what I stand for: if you want to piss me off you need only worship me.)

So. Did I just put you to sleep or make your brain glaze over?
 
2014-05-18 12:26:26 AM  
HaywoodJablonski:

wildcardjack: The problem of having a few billion people aspiring upwards.

Luckily they've only made it to "American redneck."


Oh blow me. I'll even wash it for ya.
 
2014-05-18 12:47:06 AM  

Smeggy Smurf: I ran out of good booze so I'm mixing everclear with Shasta cola and a splash of imitation vanilla


Around here fifth of Everclear or Golden Grain is about the same price as a 1.75 L handle of not-quite-the-cheapest 80-proof vodka. Is it much better? Can you add a little water to make your own "vodka" or is it best heavily mixed? And does it cause hangovers easily?

One good thing about your recipe is the local Dollar Tree carries 2-liter bottles of Shasta Cola. It even beats Save-a-Lot's store brand, whatever that is. And that and REAL vanilla extract can be had with SNAP (formerly known as Food Stamps). If I've got to be a crazy sot I'd rather do it cheaply.

The booze market being what it is I've been joking about buying plain ethanol in bulk to mix it with tap water and filter that through burned toast to produce a local "craft" vodka. "Made by our unique Fayette County process. Capture the spirit of the Bluegrass!" I'm thinking all it'd need to draw the Creative Class is a snazzy "low-fi" label, maybe a rainbow over banjo. Done in crayon.

By the way, I'm listing to port again. It's probably time to brush my teeth and lay down before I fall over.
 
2014-05-18 01:02:23 AM  
To reference back to the start of the article, which I saw this morning in the print edition, there is a lot to be said in favor of Templeton Rye.  It makes a damn fine Old Fashioned.

OTOH, back about forty years ago, when my brother and I were in college, Dad sent us out to get some booze from the local liquor store and we found this one item, Old Daniel Boone Sipping Whiskey.  It came in a crock jug, sealed with a cork.  Being young and stupid, we were intrigued and bought it.  Christ Almighty, was that stuff raw!  I imagine it was just one step up from moonshine.  However, it got you farked up real quick,.
 
2014-05-18 02:29:15 AM  
DrunkWithImpotence:

Just ship them a few cases of this type of stuff.  Oh, and make sure it contains enough lead and melamine to have a proper tang.

We don't have to make any such effort... they're doing it to themselves.  I don't think I ever had a real Jack Daniels over there.
 
2014-05-18 03:49:18 AM  

born_yesterday: iheartscotch: FDR Jones: iheartscotch: JoieD'Zen: This is why we can't have nice things.

Let's start cutting back here by not allowing sales to those who taint decent bourbon with mixer. Ice or a splash of water or soda is all that is acceptable.

/water

My brother, Fred, is no longer allowed to drink my good scotch. He mixed my Walker Green with Diet Coke, blue power aid, monster energy drink and red bull.

I made him drink all of the resulting abomination when I saw what he had done. Now, I have a big bottle of *shudders* Evan Williams for when he comes over.

/ I think he may have learned his lesson on mixing scotch

Absolutely nothing wrong with Evan Williams. It's around 5-7 years old (Maker's, for instance, is around 6), it's above 80 proof and it's cheap as hell. What more do you want?

It tastes like a worse Jack Daniels. It just tastes like a skunk sprayed into your mouth. If you like it; more power to ya. If I need to drink whiskey, get me some Wild Turkey. Or Bushmills. Or, even better, some Jameson.

I like the Irish whiskey, too.  I don't know where that places me on the whiskey social ladder, and I don't care.  I bought a bottle of 20 year old Bushmill's when I was in Dublin and I drank it like it was Gatorade.  Wish I saved it.


I was thinking as long as the Chinese keep their hands off the Irish whiskey I'm OK.

/I loves me my Green Spot, the nectar of the gods!
 
2014-05-18 09:39:50 AM  

arkansized: The Balvenie is very nice...highly recommended.


i'm touring the distillery in july, so i'm getting a kick...
 
2014-05-18 10:37:08 AM  

The One True TheDavid: Smeggy Smurf: I ran out of good booze so I'm mixing everclear with Shasta cola and a splash of imitation vanilla

Around here fifth of Everclear or Golden Grain is about the same price as a 1.75 L handle of not-quite-the-cheapest 80-proof vodka. Is it much better? Can you add a little water to make your own "vodka" or is it best heavily mixed? And does it cause hangovers easily?


The best thing I can say about it is it'll do the job.  If you drink it straight it will take the hair off of a wooden leg
 
2014-05-18 01:03:23 PM  

FlashHarry: arkansized: The Balvenie is very nice...highly recommended.

i'm touring the distillery in july, so i'm getting a kick...


Lucky you! Enjoy.
 
2014-05-18 07:44:32 PM  

arkansized: FlashHarry: arkansized: The Balvenie is very nice...highly recommended.

i'm touring the distillery in july, so i'm getting a kick...

Lucky you! Enjoy.


i cannot wait! looking forward to the speyside cooperage too.
 
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