Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Alaska Dispatch News)   In the wake of the botched lethal injection in Oklahoma last month, Utah has a suggestion: Bring back the firing squad   (adn.com) divider line 208
    More: Unlikely, Oklahoma, lethal injection, Utah, Death Penalty Information Center, human form, heightened scrutiny, Utah Attorney General, Winchester rifle  
•       •       •

2614 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 May 2014 at 9:00 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



208 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Last | Show all
 
2014-05-17 03:57:11 PM  
Each major city just puts its prisoners in the unpressurized cargo hold of a jet flying to one of the other cities.  Then, they just bury each other's dead and call it a day.  We already have all these cargo jets flying around.
 
2014-05-17 04:01:17 PM  
This works better and more accurate

www.investwithalex.com
 
2014-05-17 04:02:54 PM  

TheWarp: Scott_Free: 1 word: Helium

Perfectly good helium that could be used for scientific research? Nope.

/12 rounds of 5.56x45 is much cheaper.


nitrogen, in fact. We ain't running out of that.

this whole debate is brain damaged because the whole point of lethal injection  is "kick backs" to pharma companies with exclusive contracts.

think about that for a sec, before we get back to the point; a pure nitrogen is an entirely painless to kill someone, cheaply, surely, peacefully. but we dont (see previous paragraph for your quotient of ill-will towards corporate-governance revolving doors)
 
2014-05-17 04:36:18 PM  

profplump: If society believes these people should die, society should see them die, and should have to deal with the consequences.


Unless you never believed in the death penalty in the first place, in which case you shouldn't have to watch someone strapped to something and murdered in cold blood, which let's not sugar coat it, is exactly what an execution is.
 
2014-05-17 04:49:31 PM  

Scott_Free: 1 word: Helium


Wouldnt a plastic bag of pure nitrogen do the same thing with the same gently passing out?

I remember when some nasa employees accidentally walked into a room flooded with nitrogen, and they just passed out and died.

Nitrogen would be cheaper too, right?

I briefly researched this option after game 7 sharks/kings :(
 
2014-05-17 05:16:58 PM  
How about we put the convicted to death using the same manner that they killed their victims?  Nothing more infuriating than reading about how some sick fark convicted of killing some innocent girl by a gruesome method is concerned that the drug cocktail he will be given might give him a slight headache during the execution.
 
2014-05-17 05:20:35 PM  

SCUBA_Archer: How about we put the convicted to death using the same manner that they killed their victims?


Because we're trying to have a civilization here?
 
2014-05-17 05:30:46 PM  

DrExplosion: LoneWolf343: DrExplosion: burning_bridge: Just get rid of it.  Pointless, stupid, solves nothing, deters nobody, costs a ton of money, and makes us all murderers in the eyes of the world.

"But they need to be punished!"

Live long enough, life punishes you.  Ever see someone go through cancer?  Or heart disease?  Or the other things that come with old age?  Or even just watching your face change as it gets wrinkled and ugly.  No, if you really want them to be punished you'll let them live nice, long lives.  Death is the easy way out.  Make them live each one of their miserable years.

It's a good thing you're so enlightened and merciful.

"Sure, we force people to spend the rest of their days trapped in a cage, deprived of any sort of freedom or personal agency, even preventing them from ending their own lives, but at least we aren't murderers."


Death isn't such a big deal and the West needs to stop being a bunch of farking children about it.

Alright. You go first.

Men have tried and failed to kill me but succeeded at killing my friends, and I've responded by killing them right back. It's dirty and unpleasant, but it isn't magic. I'm alive, they aren't, the world keeps spinning.

Most people in the West grow up in a bizarre, sheltered bubble where people reach "adulthood" without really being confronted with mortality, so when someone finally does die, everyone freaks out and acts like the sky is falling. Death is a thing that happens, and as a society we put too much value on "life."  Today's America would never have made it across the Atlantic, spread to the Pacific, learned to fly, or made it to the moon. One's own death is generally to be avoided if it can be done without compromising one's principles, and people are right to feel sad when their loved ones die, but we take it too far with our "life at any cost" philosophy. The fact that there is any sort of controversy regarding the right of a terminally ill individual to end their own life is a fine exampl ...


Every time someone has tried to convince me that they are a stone cold killer, they turn out to be rather transparent liars.
 
2014-05-17 05:43:10 PM  

taurusowner: A sanitized execution says that the people just want that waste of a human gone. It doesn't have to be barbaric, just a way to delete someone who doesn't deserve to occupy the same planet as the rest of us anymore.


And that, my friend, was precisely the argument in favour of Zyklon B. Quick clean disposal of worthless people.

No person, and certainly no government, has the right to decide that someone doesn't deserve to occupy the same planet as the rest of us anymore
 
2014-05-17 05:44:12 PM  

SCUBA_Archer: How about we put the convicted to death using the same manner that they killed their victims?


How about you join the rest of the civilised world and stop allowing your government to kill people?
 
2014-05-17 05:46:47 PM  

Whistling Kitty Chaser: PreMortem: StrikitRich: If the inmate died, how was the execution not a success?

The eighth ammendment would like a word.

If we can take away 2nd amendment rights from criminals, why not 8th amendment rights?

/Kidding.


I think you mean, "if we can take away 2nd amendement rights from citizens, not whot the 8th amendment rights from criminals.

(i'm trying)
 
2014-05-17 05:53:11 PM  

Mugato: profplump: If society believes these people should die, society should see them die, and should have to deal with the consequences.

Unless you never believed in the death penalty in the first place, in which case you shouldn't have to watch someone strapped to something and murdered in cold blood, which let's not sugar coat it, is exactly what an execution is.


So they can come live with you? (Trolling.)
Or you just want them locked in a box until they die? Happy to pay for that too?

When there is no doubt of the crime and the evil behind it causes the jury to go for the death penalty, then their time in jail should be short and the death quick. (Not botched and allowed to suffer.)
Some people are just no good for a civilized world, proved it, and need to be removed.
I would pull a handle if I had to protect you and I from harm. It's not murder, it's protection.
It's letting people see that there is a price that will be paid for killing others as a deterrent from such irrational behavior.

I'm all for that unless you take out a Senator or H.Rep,
then perhaps life in a minimum security prison might be suitable... if not a pardon depending on who it was and what they did. (Like those who signed and keep the Patriot Act alive, and similar acts of destruction to our Constitution and B.o.R.)

Wouldn't that be a hoot? "The jury has viewed the information and found Senator Asshole has indeed failed to keep the spirit and letter of the laws causing detriment to said laws and found the killing of Senator Asshole to be justified. You may go."
(That would deter them from sucking corporate dick.)
 
2014-05-17 05:56:06 PM  
This problem has already been solved. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vbAmu3DXk5c

The criteria were painless, foolproof and humane.
 
2014-05-17 06:02:27 PM  

onyxruby: I never understood why they don't use carbon monoxide poisoning from an engine. It's known to work from people accidentally asphyxiating themselves in garages or using it for suicide. It's painless and you pass away before you die and as far as I know doesn't have the nasty side effects of electrocution or lethal injection.


It could be because some other folks tried it less than a hundred years ago...some of them even put festive artwork on the outside of the trucks.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gas_van
 
2014-05-17 06:03:12 PM  

orbister: How about you join the rest of the civilised world and stop allowing your government to kill people?


Because some people NEED killing.
 
2014-05-17 06:08:32 PM  
if we're going to change the conversation to whether the death penalty is a good or bad thing, i only believe that whatever we do to dogs, we should do to humans and vice versa. We'll only know how good we are by that measure.

but just about a good way to go, if we're gonna? yeah, it makes no sense to use drugs unless <kickback>
 
2014-05-17 06:11:32 PM  

Stoker: Some people are just no good for a civilized world, proved it, and need to be removed.


Any world which makes that decision is no civilised.

I would pull a handle if I had to protect you and I from harm. It's not murder, it's protection.

If the criminal is in custody, that's all the protection I need, thanks. If s/he's at large, your pulling a handle isn't going to protect me much.

It's letting people see that there is a price that will be paid for killing others as a deterrent from such irrational behavior.

If it is such a good deterrent, why do you need to use it?
 
2014-05-17 06:25:40 PM  

LoneWolf343: Every time someone has tried to convince me that they are a stone cold killer, they turn out to be rather transparent liars.


Does this happen often? How do they usually prove themselves to be liars? I'd wager that besides the laughably obvious ITGs, it's just a matter of you assuming that tough guys can't exist anywhere on the internet. Believe it or not, real badasses do exist, and just like the rest of us they have been known to surf the internet from time to time. Now,  I wouldn't describe myself as a badass, but I've had the requisite combination of good and bad luck to find myself in lethal confrontations but survive through violent means. If the idea that I have killed is unbelievable to you, then I don't really know what to say besides the fact that it kind of supports my point. Death and killing are so foreign and mystical to you that it strains your belief to think that you could actually be speaking to someone who has experience with them. Your reaction is the same as if I said I'd seen Bigfoot.

I'm not saying that dying isn't (usually) bad or that killing shouldn't (usually) be avoided, I'm just saying that the "first world" is sheltered and, lacking any experience with death, makes a bigger deal about it than is warranted.
 
2014-05-17 06:48:07 PM  
www.automizeit.com
 
2014-05-17 06:48:53 PM  

Mugato: SCUBA_Archer: How about we put the convicted to death using the same manner that they killed their victims?

Because we're trying to have a civilization here?


The quality of a civilization is measured by its most corrupt citizen.  Some folks don't have any empathy or sympathy without the fear of what their wrongs can cost them, in pain or financial.  Sometimes, if the justice system doesn't put a head on a pike, the locals will ignore the rules.  Somehow, you think you can change this.

If you ever become a victim of a violent crime, I want you to restate, "Because we're trying to have a civilization here?"
 
2014-05-17 06:51:34 PM  

lack of warmth: f you ever become a victim of a violent crime, I want you to restate, "Because we're trying to have a civilization here?"


So you support executing people in the same manner that thy killed their victims, no matter how farked up? Great so then we'll have two damaged psychos instead of just one.
 
2014-05-17 06:51:42 PM  

DrExplosion: LoneWolf343: Every time someone has tried to convince me that they are a stone cold killer, they turn out to be rather transparent liars.

Does this happen often? How do they usually prove themselves to be liars? I'd wager that besides the laughably obvious ITGs, it's just a matter of you assuming that tough guys can't exist anywhere on the internet. Believe it or not, real badasses do exist, and just like the rest of us they have been known to surf the internet from time to time. Now,  I wouldn't describe myself as a badass, but I've had the requisite combination of good and bad luck to find myself in lethal confrontations but survive through violent means. If the idea that I have killed is unbelievable to you, then I don't really know what to say besides the fact that it kind of supports my point. Death and killing are so foreign and mystical to you that it strains your belief to think that you could actually be speaking to someone who has experience with them. Your reaction is the same as if I said I'd seen Bigfoot.

I'm not saying that dying isn't (usually) bad or that killing shouldn't (usually) be avoided, I'm just saying that the "first world" is sheltered and, lacking any experience with death, makes a bigger deal about it than is warranted.


No, I believe genuine badasses exist. I just also believe that they don't brag about how badass they are, and the ones that do brag about it aren't badasses, especially those who resort to bragging immediately when they are challenged on how full of shiat they are.

I actually work with one of those guys. According to him, he was an explosives expert in the military, a cop, and a prison guard, and could blow a man's head off at 200 yards, but when another guy I work with, a mild, easy-going guy, finally had enough of his shiat and told him to fark off, that "badass" slunk off and didn't say a word for the rest of that day.
 
2014-05-17 06:52:59 PM  

LoneWolf343: and could blow a man's head off at 200 yards


Camper.
 
2014-05-17 06:55:23 PM  

lack of warmth: Mugato: SCUBA_Archer: How about we put the convicted to death using the same manner that they killed their victims?

Because we're trying to have a civilization here?

The quality of a civilization is measured by its most corrupt citizen.  Some folks don't have any empathy or sympathy without the fear of what their wrongs can cost them, in pain or financial.  Sometimes, if the justice system doesn't put a head on a pike, the locals will ignore the rules.  Somehow, you think you can change this.

If you ever become a victim of a violent crime, I want you to restate, "Because we're trying to have a civilization here?"


I was once threatened with a gun when I was just a young boy. I still find your worldview cynical and backwards.
 
2014-05-17 07:15:28 PM  

SCUBA_Archer: How about we put the convicted to death using the same manner that they killed their victims?


The death penalty is already pretty messed up but I like your "in for a penny, in for a pound" attitude.
 
2014-05-17 07:28:25 PM  

Mugato: profplump: If society believes these people should die, society should see them die, and should have to deal with the consequences.

Unless you never believed in the death penalty in the first place, in which case you shouldn't have to watch someone strapped to something and murdered in cold blood, which let's not sugar coat it, is exactly what an execution is.


Mugato, you're one of my favorite people on the internet, not just FARK, so it pains me to disagree with you. Fortunately, it's a minor disagreement, and something we never need worry about happening. I agree with profplump because if even anti-death penalty advocates are forced to observe, it may harden their resolve to find a way to end this insult to justice.

I remember back in the '70s or '80s, there was an anti-death penalty congressman from Alabama, and he tried to pass a bill requiring lottery tickets to be sold to all executions. The executions were to be held at the University of Alabama football stadium, and attendance would be mandatory for every man, woman or child that "won" the lottery, Executions were to be performed utilizing four tractors with chains tied to each limb of the guest of honor, and facing to the four points of the compass.

I believe that if someone sat through one of those, they might not want to attend another.
 
2014-05-17 07:32:21 PM  
The reforms to speed up capital punishment appeals at the federal level are pretty common sense:

1)  Declare states to be "competent authorities" of the means of execution.  This means no nit-picking by federal judges about how states choose to execute.  It is up to them.

2)  Move death penalty appeals to the head of the appeals court docket.  There shouldn't be years of delay just to be heard by a judge.

3)  Personal opposition to the death penalty merits recusal by judges, instead of dilly-dallying with cases for a decade.

4)  Limit appeals continuances to one month each for the defense, prosecution, and at the discretion of the judge.  Three months delays, total.
 
2014-05-17 07:36:15 PM  
A 30 pound weight and 8 foot tank of water.
 
2014-05-17 07:37:47 PM  
LoneWolf343:  No, I believe genuine badasses exist. I just also believe that they don't brag about how badass they are, and the ones that do brag about it aren't badasses, especially those who resort to bragging immediately when they are challenged on how full of shiat they are.

I actually work with one of those guys. According to him, he was an explosives expert in the military, a cop, and a prison guard, and could blow a man's head off at 200 yards, but when another guy I work with, a mild, easy-going guy, finally had enough of his shiat and told him to fark off, that "badass" slunk off and didn't say a word for the rest of that day.


None of this is unbelievable, actually. I don't know where you work and I haven't met the guy in question, but it is well within reason that someone could say these things and not be full of shiat. Many people go into law enforcement when they leave the military, both of those are places where one would acquire skill with weapons, and depending on the rifle and the optics being used, hitting a stationary head-sized target at 200 yards could be pretty easy and not worth bragging about at all.

Also if your first paragraph was describing me, you might want to re-calibrate yourself a bit.
 
2014-05-17 07:41:11 PM  

DrExplosion: Men have tried and failed to kill me but succeeded at killing my friends, and I've responded by killing them right back. It's dirty and unpleasant, but it isn't magic. I'm alive, they aren't, the world keeps spinning.


Don't you have to be at the gym in 15?
 
2014-05-17 07:46:31 PM  

JuniorII: DrExplosion: Men have tried and failed to kill me but succeeded at killing my friends, and I've responded by killing them right back. It's dirty and unpleasant, but it isn't magic. I'm alive, they aren't, the world keeps spinning.

Don't you have to be at the gym in 15?


That comment was hours ago. I get back from the gym in 26 minutes.
 
2014-05-17 08:53:35 PM  
UNAUTHORIZED FINGER:

Helium is cool though, because when the condemned man says his last words, they come out all high-pitched and comical, adding a little levity to what otherwise is a rather somber event. You gotta think of the kiddies.

To you, sir or madam, one free Internet.
 
2014-05-17 09:41:44 PM  
The first thing I thought after reading the headline:

If a convict is executed in Utah, does the LDS church immediately perform a proxy baptism for that person?
 
2014-05-17 10:14:24 PM  

Mugato: KyDave: The main reason that the State dispenses the punishment is because the crime was so heinous and irreverent of society that the State was indeed a victim of the convicted's actions. Send them to their Final Arbiter, and be done with it. Of course, this is predicated on the State's due diligence to rightly and correctly ascertain guilt - a whole other discussion by itself.

And what about all the people on death row who were found not guilty because of new evidence (and by implication we can assume that some innocents were executed), collateral damage?


Yes, as stated, a whole other discussion which does not invalidate a single word written before your selective edit.
 
2014-05-17 10:34:11 PM  

Abox: I thought Utah still had the firing squad...like they were capital punishment hipsters. My first real awareness of modern execution was a Life magazine article about Gary Gilmore's in Utah.  I remember the pic of the black vinyl chair with the bullet hole in the back.


Only for death row inmates that were convicted before 2006 and pick the option of a firing squad.
 
2014-05-17 11:03:38 PM  
Meh. . .keep it simple.

lead the convicted into a large room (say 20' by 20') with nothing but bars.  Underneath are burners.  Started them slowly and increase the flames every five minutes.  The convicted will involuntarily start dancing like a puppet.  Sooner or later he will succumb to the flames (not the smoke as the room will be well ventilated above).  Keep increasing the temperature even after the convicted has twitched with his/her last spasm so that the body itself is reduced to nothing but ashes.  No body to bury.  Nothing left of said person but their final agonizing screams.

Force it to show on all TV channels.  It MIGHT be a deterrent.

And no I am not sadistic.  Merely practical, pragmatic and efficient.
 
m00
2014-05-17 11:18:03 PM  

K3rmy: Meh. . .keep it simple.

lead the convicted into a large room (say 20' by 20') with nothing but bars.  Underneath are burners.  Started them slowly and increase the flames every five minutes.  The convicted will involuntarily start dancing like a puppet.  Sooner or later he will succumb to the flames (not the smoke as the room will be well ventilated above).  Keep increasing the temperature even after the convicted has twitched with his/her last spasm so that the body itself is reduced to nothing but ashes.  No body to bury.  Nothing left of said person but their final agonizing screams.

Force it to show on all TV channels.  It MIGHT be a deterrent.

And no I am not sadistic.  Merely practical, pragmatic and efficient.


That sounds like a threat. No, wait... that sounds like you're planning a murder. I think a prosecutor should try you for attempted murder, and you should get the death penalty. Subjected to your own device you describe above. Oh, that's not fair because you weren't really planning a murder and you're actually innocent? Well, guess what...
 
2014-05-18 01:01:57 AM  
Go for hanging. Ammo prices are up.
 
2014-05-18 01:24:56 AM  

orbister: SCUBA_Archer: How about we put the convicted to death using the same manner that they killed their victims?

How about you join the rest of the civilised world and stop allowing your government to kill people?


A civilized world rewards good behavior and punishes bad behavior.  If you are unable to exist in society without taking another's life, we will be happy to accommodate that request to be removed from society.  And hopefully you will be a lesson for those considering misbehavior in the future.
 
2014-05-18 01:27:48 AM  

Jument: SCUBA_Archer: How about we put the convicted to death using the same manner that they killed their victims?

The death penalty is already pretty messed up but I like your "in for a penny, in for a pound" attitude.


I was compromising by offering murderers death by their own chosen technique.  What I'd really like to see is for people to be set up in SAW-like torture contraptions.  Give them a (small) sporting chance to escape.  If they fail before time runs out, well justice was served in the end.
 
2014-05-18 01:35:13 AM  
Some of you people have serious issues.
 
2014-05-18 02:19:57 AM  

Mugato: Some of you people have serious issues.


Is it more humane caging people like animals for 50 years in the hopes that they will suddenly change their outlook on life?
 
2014-05-18 02:26:57 AM  

destrip: The first thing I thought after reading the headline:

If a convict is executed in Utah, does the LDS church immediately perform a proxy baptism for that person?


1. The dead have to be dead for at least a year before any ordinances by proxy are performed (including baptism)
2. It would have to be requested by a member who was a direct relative.
3. Many decades ago, there was a ban on baptizing those who had committed murder. In more recent times, this was changed, as it was decided that no one could really tell how mentally disabled a murderer was - in other words, how much a mental illness took away their ability to decide their actions, so it was decided to just leave that up to god and baptize them anyway, if requested by a relative.

But the location of death really doesn't factor into anything.
 
2014-05-18 03:59:02 AM  

K3rmy: Meh. . .keep it simple.

lead the convicted into a large room (say 20' by 20') with nothing but bars.  Underneath are burners.  Started them slowly and increase the flames every five minutes.  The convicted will involuntarily start dancing like a puppet.  Sooner or later he will succumb to the flames (not the smoke as the room will be well ventilated above).  Keep increasing the temperature even after the convicted has twitched with his/her last spasm so that the body itself is reduced to nothing but ashes.  No body to bury.  Nothing left of said person but their final agonizing screams.

Force it to show on all TV channels.  It MIGHT be a deterrent.

And no I am not sadistic.  Merely practical, pragmatic and efficient.


That sounds like a lot of effort. If you want efficiency, skip the theatrics and just bury them. The whole mortal coil thing will sort itself out.

/Not a big fan of the death penalty.
 
2014-05-18 08:00:32 AM  

DrExplosion: JuniorII: DrExplosion: Men have tried and failed to kill me but succeeded at killing my friends, and I've responded by killing them right back. It's dirty and unpleasant, but it isn't magic. I'm alive, they aren't, the world keeps spinning.

Don't you have to be at the gym in 15?

That comment was hours ago. I get back from the gym in 26 minutes.


Yawn. I don't keep up with your every move.

No matter how desperately you try to make your self seem fascinating.
 
2014-05-18 08:22:12 AM  
I'm surprised that any US state ever stopped using hanging / shooting as a form of execution. The other methods are just needlessly complex, expensive, error prone and arguably more cruel / inhuman (whatever that means) than the good old fashioned way.
 
2014-05-18 08:33:56 AM  

drxym: I'm surprised that any US state ever stopped using hanging / shooting as a form of execution. The other methods are just needlessly complex, expensive, error prone and arguably more cruel / inhuman (whatever that means) than the good old fashioned way.


Hanging is very easy to get wrong. Lots of people end up choking to death or having their heads ripped clean off.  Shooters can miss, sometimes on purpose. It's hard to get 6 guys to shoot someone.
 
2014-05-18 10:09:10 AM  

m00: [www.quickmeme.com image 625x468]

/what, are you gay?


"Boola Boola"
 
2014-05-18 11:33:00 AM  

SCUBA_Archer: Mugato: Some of you people have serious issues.

Is it more humane caging people like animals for 50 years in the hopes that they will suddenly change their outlook on life?


Indeed.  Prisons, and operating prisons, and what happens in prisons is something we can pretend isn't happening.  Even though it consists of subjecting people to psychological torture and physical abuse for decades.
 
m00
2014-05-18 12:33:17 PM  

noitsnot: Indeed. Prisons, and operating prisons, and what happens in prisons is something we can pretend isn't happening. Even though it consists of subjecting people to psychological torture and physical abuse for decades.


static.guim.co.uk
/Norwegian prison.

Their crime rate is astoundingly low, so they must be doing something right.
 
Displayed 50 of 208 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report