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(Slate)   "Dear Prudence: I told everyone that my teacher hurt me and she got fired because of my allegations. Problem was, I was lying and I kinda feel bad about it. Should I say something or am I okay forgetting all about it?"   (slate.com) divider line 138
    More: Fail, allegations, Innocence Project, teachers  
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13147 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 May 2014 at 10:15 AM (10 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-05-16 12:45:11 PM
I grew up in PA where many of the teachers were also coaches.  I was in a study hall with a football coach/math teacher who had an absolute silence rule.  A kid asked me what page the homework was on and I said "33" or whatever.  He brought me out in the hall, grabbed me by the neck and slammed the back of my head into the tile wall.  Total moronic dickhead.  Nobody got told about it or sued.
 
2014-05-16 12:56:48 PM
So apparently our schools are (or at least were) run by a bunch of aggressive psychopaths. So of course it goes without saying that the letters in Dear Prudence are fake.
 
2014-05-16 12:57:17 PM

someonelse: rumpelstiltskin: I call bullshiat. If she's a grandmother, she's probably older than I am, and when I was a kid if your teacher saw fit to whoop you your parents didn't complain. They figured you must have deserved it, and you'd be lucky if all they did was write a note thanking the teacher for doing their job.

How old are you. I'm in my 40s and some of my classmates are grandparents. And teachers weren't allowed to whomp on us in school.


I'm also in my 40's and up until 8th grade teachers could whomp the heck out of you (i.e., paddling). You must have gone to the pacifist school (lucky you).

/no, I was never paddled but I did witness that sort of thing waaaaay too many times.
 
2014-05-16 12:58:19 PM

naughtyrev: scottydoesntknow: PreMortem: If the story is true, which I doubt any dear prudence is, the details should be handed over to law enforcement to identify the idiot.


/dnrtfa

IF this story is true, it's probably well past the statute of limitations. She said she was a child when it happened and now she's a grandmother.

I agree that it's probably well outside the statute of limitations, but I did meet someone in their upper 30s a few weeks ago that is a grandmother.


I work with a woman who is 37 and has 6 kids and 4 grandkids
 
2014-05-16 01:02:19 PM

Wangiss: Jews-in-the-Attic test is the brainchild of one Joe Huffman. I completely agreed with it even before I read it; it's just a very elegant way to say it. One-liners that get the whole point across are few and far between.


I finally found a readable example of my favorite short story of this century, Englander's "What We Talk About When We Talk About Anne Frank," courtesy of the BBC. (Warming: link to PDF.)

kbronsito: The One True TheDavid: kbronsito:

Not if she's Mexican. She could be a 16-year-old grandma.

That's not only racist, it's biologically impossible.

thank god for your superior insights into both biology and Mexicans. Do you list "living next to a trailer park full of Mexicans" on your resume? In our diverse society, these special skills and knowledge are highly valued by employers.


Excuse me for your racism. Fool.


And even with menarche at 9 she'd have to be at least 20 to be a grandma, and would still be a freak of nature. It ain't common, to say the least.
 
2014-05-16 01:02:39 PM

chachi88: Late-60's my elementary school principal carried a ping-pong paddle in his back pocket. "Boys, grab your ankles!"


but what was the ping-pong paddle for?
 
2014-05-16 01:07:23 PM

Cletus C.: What a little biatch. And she grew into an old coont who now wants forgiveness.


That was what struck me as the weird thing about this letter. No idea how old she is, but assume it's been 40 years since the incident at least - and she's still that pathetic little girl wanting the pat on the head and the "poor baby" from her mother. And the worst part is that rather than tell her to get over herself, Prudie just goes ahead and gives it to her.

Somewhere out there is a woman who spent the rest of her life wondering how one of the children she'd dedicated her life to helping would be such a sociopath as to trash her career like that.
 
2014-05-16 01:11:39 PM

naughtyrev: I prefer the next letter about the guy intentionally showing his junk and claiming he left his fly down


Hey, now. That can happen to anyone. Well, not women, most of 'em anyway.
 
2014-05-16 01:14:09 PM

James Rieper: More shocked by the letter that lady wrote about pushing her husband's orphan sister out of the nest.

What a cold, heartless, unfeeling biatch.  This isn't a pound puppy for Christ's sake.


The comments make me shake my head. An awful lot of, "Hey, my parents did that to me, what's the big deal?"

Come to think of it, I've seen that story a lot on Fark, too.

It's gotta be rough, having your parents treat you like an interruption to their life.
 
2014-05-16 01:33:04 PM

rumpelstiltskin: I call bullshiat. If she's a grandmother, she's probably older than I am, and when I was a kid if your teacher saw fit to whoop you your parents didn't complain. They figured you must have deserved it, and you'd be lucky if all they did was write a note thanking the teacher for doing their job.


Winner! I was hit by teachers with two by fours in school. More than once. One of the offenses that lead to a 2x4 beating was calling a classmate Big Butt Bertha or something like that.

CSB: About five years later when I was on the baseball team in high school, the teacher from the Bertha incident was an assistant coach. One day he was pitching BP to me with no screen. I smacked one about three feet off the ground and it hit him square in the nads. He fell to his knees. I chuckled.
 
2014-05-16 01:41:29 PM
She is an evil whopping coont who's BS compromises the actual suffering of the abused. Hang her high.

If someone claims the sky is falling, come down on them like an f'n hurricane.
 
2014-05-16 01:43:12 PM

The One True TheDavid: Wangiss: Jews-in-the-Attic test is the brainchild of one Joe Huffman. I completely agreed with it even before I read it; it's just a very elegant way to say it. One-liners that get the whole point across are few and far between.

I finally found a readable example of my favorite short story of this century, Englander's "What We Talk About When We Talk About Anne Frank," courtesy of the BBC. (Warming: link to PDF.)

kbronsito: The One True TheDavid: kbronsito:

Not if she's Mexican. She could be a 16-year-old grandma.

That's not only racist, it's biologically impossible.

thank god for your superior insights into both biology and Mexicans. Do you list "living next to a trailer park full of Mexicans" on your resume? In our diverse society, these special skills and knowledge are highly valued by employers.

Excuse me for your racism. Fool.


And even with menarche at 9 she'd have to be at least 20 to be a grandma, and would still be a freak of nature. It ain't common, to say the least.


Idk if the Mexicans from the trailer park have let you in on this, but most hispanics take more kindly to an absurd ethnic joke about Latino stereotypes than they do take to gringos who think they know shiat because they took high school spanish and have a Mexican friend.
 
2014-05-16 01:53:34 PM
So, whoever submitted this read the column, looked it over, saw that one of the stories was about a six year old getting her arm pinched fifty odd years ago and another was about a guy getting his peen out whenever his wife's friends come over.

And subby chose to lead with the pinched kid.

fascinating.
 
2014-05-16 01:55:26 PM
Dear Guilty,

You seem to like wallowing in guilt and remorse over something that happened a long time ago.  I think you need to double down.  Go and find what happened to the school teacher you lied about.  If she's alive, you should make it your mission in life to tell everyone around her so they think she is the devil incarnate for what she did.  If she's not alive go kill yourself.

Hugs and giggles,

Prudence
 
2014-05-16 02:03:56 PM
Nah... don't worry about it. You are going to hell. Too late to change that! Buh bye! Yeah... an eternity in hellfire because you decided to be a piss biatch. Enjoy!

/Too bad that I don't believe in hell... 'cos that'd be cool.
 
2014-05-16 02:07:02 PM
When I was in third grade we had a psycho nun.  You never heard a peep or a giggle in that class.  We were learning cursive and one of her pet peeves included you putting your face to close to the paper.  So she would walk up the rows from the back and if your head was close to the paper she would hit you with a gigantic teachers edition math book.  She gave several kids a bloody nose and I swear she broke one kids nose.  Kids were too terrified to tell on her and even if we did, the parents were all on the side of the nuns/priests.

Everyone was terrified to even ask to go to the bathroom.  One day there was a horrible smell in the classroom.  A girl pooped in her pencil box and put it back in her desk because she was that terrified to ask to go to the bathroom.  That same year I ended up in the hospital with a kidney infection because I got a UTI and wouldn't drink enough water because I needed to avoid asking to use the bathroom while in her room.

She also checked your desks one a week and about every third week things got a little messy for me and she would pick my desk up over her head and shake out all the contents and you would have to gather everything up and put it back in.  If it wasn't to her satisfaction, she would do it all over again.

Of course Karma shows up on occasion even in Catholic Schools and she went off the deep end and ended up in the nut ward.  I heard later on she was not longer a nun, so I suspect she got kicked out.  Sister Agnes....what a total biatch that woman was.
 
2014-05-16 02:20:21 PM

drjekel_mrhyde: Not trying to sound like that guy, but anyone ever noticed that it was no mass school shooting back when schools dished out corporal punishment


Well, you're "that guy".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_school_shootings_in_the_United_ St ates#1950s

The reason "mass" has been added to the word is the fact that, on rare occasion, more than one person gets shot these days. I purport that, because we're no longer teaching our kids how to handle firearms, that we're just seeing yet another public education inadequacy. It couldn't be due to the explosive proliferation of handguns, especially handguns capable of holding more than six rounds, or the encouragement of "gun culture" in nearly every form of media - television, radio, video games, Internet, books, etc. - available and targeted specifically towards a young adult audience.

Nah, it has to be a public education inadequacy. That's the ticket.
 
2014-05-16 02:34:22 PM
gambitsgirl: I'm 42.  I got corporal punishment for sure and my mom told me what I got at school I'd get twice as bad at home.

Sis?
 
2014-05-16 02:41:39 PM

stir22: chachi88: Late-60's my elementary school principal carried a ping-pong paddle in his back pocket. "Boys, grab your ankles!"

but what was the ping-pong paddle for?


Wiping off the end.
 
2014-05-16 02:43:08 PM

naughtyrev: scottydoesntknow: PreMortem: If the story is true, which I doubt any dear prudence is, the details should be handed over to law enforcement to identify the idiot.


/dnrtfa

IF this story is true, it's probably well past the statute of limitations. She said she was a child when it happened and now she's a grandmother.

I agree that it's probably well outside the statute of limitations, but I did meet someone in their upper 30s a few weeks ago that is a grandmother.


I know a 29 year old grandmother :(
 
2014-05-16 03:02:10 PM

FormlessOne: drjekel_mrhyde: Not trying to sound like that guy, but anyone ever noticed that it was no mass school shooting back when schools dished out corporal punishment

Well, you're "that guy".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_school_shootings_in_the_United_ St ates#1950s

The reason "mass" has been added to the word is the fact that, on rare occasion, more than one person gets shot these days. I purport that, because we're no longer teaching our kids how to handle firearms, that we're just seeing yet another public education inadequacy. It couldn't be due to the explosive proliferation of handguns, especially handguns capable of holding more than six rounds, or the encouragement of "gun culture" in nearly every form of media - television, radio, video games, Internet, books, etc. - available and targeted specifically towards a young adult audience.

Nah, it has to be a public education inadequacy. That's the ticket.


Well back in the olden days of the 70's certain transgressions, after being warned usually, resulted in getting licks from a shop-made wooden paddle. Some of the female teachers would paddle you, usually they called the science,shop teacher, or principal to administer them. Only the science teacher seemed to enjoy it. All the boys carried pocket knives, the ones old enough to drive usually had a rifle in their truck, and the only thing that ever happened was when a few of the basketball players got drunk late one night and one decided to shoot out the spotlight on the roof of the school
 
2014-05-16 03:27:19 PM
O_o

This thread is way too full of horrible people.  Suicide? you'll burn in hell?  Track the teacher down and let her kill you?  FFS, people - it was a child that performed that act.
 
2014-05-16 03:29:02 PM

happydude45: Only the science teacher seemed to enjoy it. All the boys carried pocket knives, the ones old enough to drive usually had a rifle in their truck, and the only thing that ever happened was when a few of the basketball players got drunk late one night and one decided to shoot out the spotlight on the roof of the school


You know what?  I think you're full of shiat.  I remember getting suspended for bringing a pocket knife to school - the boy scout kind with the fork and spoon on it.  It was probably around '76 or '77.
 
2014-05-16 03:40:16 PM

Babwa Wawa: happydude45: Only the science teacher seemed to enjoy it. All the boys carried pocket knives, the ones old enough to drive usually had a rifle in their truck, and the only thing that ever happened was when a few of the basketball players got drunk late one night and one decided to shoot out the spotlight on the roof of the school

You know what?  I think you're full of shiat.  I remember getting suspended for bringing a pocket knife to school - the boy scout kind with the fork and spoon on it.  It was probably around '76 or '77.


Nope. This was a little country school. I graduated in 1980. You were expected to carry a pocket knife.
 
2014-05-16 03:49:21 PM

hstein3: James Rieper: More shocked by the letter that lady wrote about pushing her husband's orphan sister out of the nest.

What a cold, heartless, unfeeling biatch.  This isn't a pound puppy for Christ's sake.

The comments make me shake my head. An awful lot of, "Hey, my parents did that to me, what's the big deal?"

Come to think of it, I've seen that story a lot on Fark, too.

It's gotta be rough, having your parents treat you like an interruption to their life.


The woman took in her husband's sister and raised her as her own for seven years.  Now that the kid is going off to college, she asked maybe the kid can give up her room in their small, crowded house and and stay with her grandparents when she comes home from college.  She asks this so that she can finally start a family with her husband, something she has put off for seven years, and she's a bad person?

I think she has done her share and more, setting the sister up to succeed in life, and deserves to be able to have her dream of her own family without feeling guilty at all.
 
2014-05-16 04:08:55 PM
I briefly moved out of town with my dad after 6th grade, his job transferred him back home halfway through 7th. As all the magnet(smart kid) schools were full for my grade level, I had to finish the year at the neighborhood school by my grandmas. The neighborhood was in Englewood on the south side of Chicago (73rd and Hoyne to be exact). My class consisted of about %25 wanna be gangsters the same in wanna be athletes a couple of legitimately smart kids and a few full fledged thoroughbreds who were already known in the streets as people not to be trifled with. A couple actually had bodies to their name already (we had 3 16 year olds in our class)

Anywho... the teachers didn't play around, they couldn't show the slightest fear or weakness or they'd get eaten alive, our English teacher kept a big ass paddle she called "the board of education" which she didn't hesitate to use. The male teachers met us on our level though. Get slightly out of line, take a solid punch to the chest. Egregious infractions merited the same type of violation you got if you screwed up with the higher ups in your particular street organization. 2 minutes with your back to the wall and your hands behind it while the teacher and the security guard wailed away (Mr prater was a 6'3 ex wideout for Alabama and the security guard was a street legend who devoted his life to helping kids not be like him after he got out of prison) it was a very good deterrent for the kids who wanted to be good and great in keeping the hoodlums properly exercised....

/forgot what point I was trying to make
 
2014-05-16 04:24:35 PM

FormlessOne: drjekel_mrhyde: Not trying to sound like that guy, but anyone ever noticed that it was no mass school shooting back when schools dished out corporal punishment

Well, you're "that guy".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_school_shootings_in_the_United_ St ates#1950s

The reason "mass" has been added to the word is the fact that, on rare occasion, more than one person gets shot these days. I purport that, because we're no longer teaching our kids how to handle firearms, that we're just seeing yet another public education inadequacy. It couldn't be due to the explosive proliferation of handguns, especially handguns capable of holding more than six rounds, or the encouragement of "gun culture" in nearly every form of media - television, radio, video games, Internet, books, etc. - available and targeted specifically towards a young adult audience.

Nah, it has to be a public education inadequacy. That's the ticket.


Huh.  And here I thought they called them mass shootings because they were shooting objects that had mass.
 
2014-05-16 05:35:07 PM

Carn: Dear Prudence,

I'm a narcoleptic, nymphomaniac midget with a little Thanksgiving problem. There's just something about the presentation of the Thanksgiving turkey with it's sexy legs all trussed up and it's cavity-vagina just calling to me, I can't help but jump up on the table and go to town. The problem is that almost instantly after the deed is finished (I'm so worked up this is usually no longer than 30 seconds), my narcolepsy kicks in and I pass out half naked on the feast beast. My question is, do you think if I drank a lot of coffee right before the turkey came out of the oven that I could stay awake long enough to sneak away after I came in it? Also, I've got a little problem I picked up from a dead diseased tranny in Thailand a couple years ago. Is it proper etiquette to wear a condom or do I need to notify everyone at dinner next year?

Thanks,

The Turkey Tiddler


Not really over the top enough for her to print.  Maybe add something about incest, Pru's a sucker for incest.
 
2014-05-16 06:44:35 PM

The One True TheDavid: Wangiss: Jews-in-the-Attic test is the brainchild of one Joe Huffman. I completely agreed with it even before I read it; it's just a very elegant way to say it. One-liners that get the whole point across are few and far between.

I finally found a readable example of my favorite short story of this century, Englander's "What We Talk About When We Talk About Anne Frank," courtesy of the BBC. (Warming: link to PDF.)



Thanks for the link. It was a good read. But fergoonessake how many title pages does a book need? I'm on page 11 before the book begins.
 
2014-05-16 07:08:52 PM
bibli0phile:

I know a 29 year old grandmother :(

Is she cute?
 
2014-05-16 07:13:15 PM

Babwa Wawa: I remember getting suspended for bringing a pocket knife to school - the boy scout kind with the fork and spoon on it. It was probably around '76 or '77.


In 1976 was suspended for dropping a literal penknife, a tiny folding thing with a 1.5" blade and no point. It was great for sharpening pencils, cutting twine, opening envelopes, etc., but if I pulled it on somebody he'd laugh till he peed himself. But it's the principle that counts, said Principal Sharrow.
 
2014-05-16 07:51:29 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: The subtext is obvious. Telling someone Lying about what your teacher is doing to you will ruin their life and you will feel bad about for the rest of yours.


Fixed.
 
2014-05-16 08:22:35 PM

darwinpolice: Assuming that she's regular grandmother age (I'm assuming 60s), I have a hard time believing that a teacher would be fired or at risk for criminal charges for pinching a student back when she was a schoolgirl.  Mild corporal punishment in schools was pretty common in the US until at least the late 60s.


Maybe it depends on where the bruise was.
 
2014-05-16 10:20:10 PM

orbister: AverageAmericanGuy: The subtext is obvious. Telling someone Lying about what your teacher is doing to you will ruin their life and you will feel bad about for the rest of yours.

Fixed.


That's not the subtext at all.

0_o
 
2014-05-16 11:49:59 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: orbister: AverageAmericanGuy: The subtext is obvious. Telling someone Lying about what your teacher is doing to you will ruin their life and you will feel bad about for the rest of yours.

Fixed.

That's not the subtext at all.

0_o


I don't think orbister knows the meaning of subtext.   But that's OK.  From each according to his capability.
 
2014-05-17 12:04:08 AM

rumpelstiltskin: I call bullshiat. If she's a grandmother, she's probably older than I am, and when I was a kid if your teacher saw fit to whoop you your parents didn't complain. They figured you must have deserved it, and you'd be lucky if all they did was write a note thanking the teacher for doing their job.


So true. Many moons ago I was on a field trip with a school sanctioned YMCA trip when one of the group leaders came up behind me and biatch-slapped me hard on the right side of the head. I mean real hard, ears ringing for the rest of the day. Turns out he meant that for someone else that was goofing off, I was just listening to what our guide was saying and not doing anything else. Told my folks about that, attitude was I must have done something to deserve it.
 
2014-05-17 12:33:15 AM
I'm 38, and when I was in junior high, there was a VP of Discipline.  If you got sent to his office, he gave you a choice: you could take after-school detention, or you could take "licks" from a hefty wooden paddle.  Most guys took the paddling instead of having to explain to their parents why they had to stay late.
 
2014-05-17 07:04:00 PM

The One True TheDavid: kbronsito:

Not if she's Mexican. She could be a 16-year-old grandma.

That's not only racist, it's biologically impossible.


http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_youngest_birth_mothers

Nope...
 
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