If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(NBC 2 Fort Myers)   Not news: Man stabs wife repeatedly. Florida: Immediately after their marriage counseling session   (nbc-2.com) divider line 63
    More: Florida, WBBH News, wife repeatedly, County detectives, Charlotte County, executive sessions  
•       •       •

2851 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 May 2014 at 11:55 AM (15 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



63 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2014-05-15 08:56:15 AM
Marriage Counseling (A One Act)

She said, "Honey, I love you."

He said, "Honey, I love you too."

She said, "Honies, I love you three.  Well I guess technically I love you twenty eight if we're extending my love boundaries to the greater metro area."

*stage direction*  Then things get stabby.

FINIS

(Authors Note:  This one-act playlet is in no way an endorsement of domestic violence.  Because in he immortal words of the renowned sage Big Bank Hank: "Hotel, motel, Holiday Inn.  Say if in fact your girl starts acting up, then you take her friend."
 
2014-05-15 09:31:11 AM
Couples therapy can be a horribly traumatic experience. My soon to be ex wife and I did months of it before we split. I didn't want to stab anybody afterwards, but it sure didn't leave us feeling lovey-dovey. Revisiting old wounds after years of dysfunction is not a fun process.
 
2014-05-15 09:31:28 AM
So the session didn't work?
 
2014-05-15 10:33:06 AM
photo of the family counselor
sharetv.com
 
2014-05-15 10:42:07 AM

IgG4: Couples therapy can be a horribly traumatic experience. My soon to be ex wife and I did months of it before we split. I didn't want to stab anybody afterwards, but it sure didn't leave us feeling lovey-dovey. Revisiting old wounds after years of dysfunction is not a fun process.


Ha yeah, I remember counseling. One counsellor was amazed to hear that I didn't want to have sex with my wife when she was in rage-mode. The counsellor said, "That's not normal, any guy I've been with wouldn't have hesitated at the chance for sex. Maybe you should have your testosterone checked."

I didn't even know what to say and finally I said, "Wow".

My wife liked that one, we never went back.
 
2014-05-15 11:25:13 AM
Man, that article is a hard read.
 
2014-05-15 11:56:56 AM
Best. Session. Ever.
 
2014-05-15 11:59:54 AM
She must have won the battle that day, but obviously not the war.
 
2014-05-15 12:02:29 PM
The counsellor should count this one as a victory. Do you know how hard it is to get a guy to let his true emotions out.
 
2014-05-15 12:02:32 PM
So do they get their money back?
 
2014-05-15 12:04:44 PM
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-05-15 12:06:48 PM
That's the best time to stab someone.
 
2014-05-15 12:06:52 PM
Must be the same guy that counseled the Manson family.
 
2014-05-15 12:08:26 PM
Sometimes you just need to slice through issues and take a stab at the heart of the problem.
 
2014-05-15 12:15:20 PM
We can tell the bias of their counselor by the stab wounds.
 
2014-05-15 12:17:36 PM
img.fark.net
 
2014-05-15 12:19:08 PM
img.fark.net
Carol Cleveland makes my pants fit funny.
 
2014-05-15 12:24:18 PM
To be fair, I understand where the guy is coming from.  Not that I would, because I'm sane and he obviously isn't, but still.  I understand.
 
2014-05-15 12:25:15 PM
Captain Stabbin'?
 
2014-05-15 12:25:22 PM

Barfmaker: IgG4: Couples therapy can be a horribly traumatic experience. My soon to be ex wife and I did months of it before we split. I didn't want to stab anybody afterwards, but it sure didn't leave us feeling lovey-dovey. Revisiting old wounds after years of dysfunction is not a fun process.

Ha yeah, I remember counseling. One counsellor was amazed to hear that I didn't want to have sex with my wife when she was in rage-mode. The counsellor said, "That's not normal, any guy I've been with wouldn't have hesitated at the chance for sex. Maybe you should have your testosterone checked."

I didn't even know what to say and finally I said, "Wow".

My wife liked that one, we never went back.


You're not supposed to have inconvenient emotions, only convenient ones. You've heard this many times in the form of requests to talk about your feelings.
 
2014-05-15 12:30:04 PM
based on the description of how she was "stabbed"  it was very much like a prison shanking
 
2014-05-15 12:33:18 PM
How come EVERY TIME someone is viciously attacked with a knife...
Stabbed or slashed several times over...
IT'S ALWAYS CALLED AGGRAVATED ASSAULT!!!
WTF do you have to do or use to get attempted murder?
Stabbing someone repeatedly with a butcher knife doesn't count???
WTF???
 
2014-05-15 12:36:59 PM

I_Am_Weasel: So the session didn't work?


The assertiveness training sure as hell did.
 
2014-05-15 12:44:38 PM

Rawhead Rex: How come EVERY TIME someone is viciously attacked with a knife...
Stabbed or slashed several times over...
IT'S ALWAYS CALLED AGGRAVATED ASSAULT!!!
WTF do you have to do or use to get attempted murder?
Stabbing someone repeatedly with a butcher knife doesn't count???
WTF???


The technicality is actual intent to kill someone.
This is also why "assault with a deadly weapon" is a thing.  Just because the weapon is deadly, does not exactly mean you intended to use it to its deadly capacity.

Attempted murder occurs when you actually attempt to kill.  Attack with intention to kill.  But fail to do so.  To succeed would mean actual murder.  To not, means you only tried.
 
2014-05-15 12:45:04 PM
Jeanwell Napolean, 50, is accused of stabbing his wife several times in her left inner bicep, middle abdomen and lower back after she called her pastor to come over for some counseling.

How come the Jesus did step in to save her?
//Counseling based in religion does not sound like a solid idea
 
2014-05-15 12:47:57 PM
Barfmaker


IgG4: Couples therapy can be a horribly traumatic experience. My soon to be ex wife and I did months of it before we split. I didn't want to stab anybody afterwards, but it sure didn't leave us feeling lovey-dovey. Revisiting old wounds after years of dysfunction is not a fun process.


Ha yeah, I remember counseling. One counsellor was amazed to hear that I didn't want to have sex with my wife when she was in rage-mode. The counsellor said, "That's not normal, any guy I've been with wouldn't have hesitated at the chance for sex. Maybe you should have your testosterone checked."

I didn't even know what to say and finally I said, "Wow".

My wife liked that one, we never went back.


Here is the trap. A woman therapist sides with the woman, a male one is either pussy whipped by his wife or is trying to make you look like an ass by siding with the woman.

All of them have a personal agenda of what they consider right... there is no standard. It is also a game of zero resolution so you keep coming back.
 
2014-05-15 12:49:38 PM
img.fark.net
 
2014-05-15 12:53:26 PM
I can attest that the times that I felt most like stabbing my wife (ex) were immediately following our counseling (failed) sessions.

What a waste of time and money. If you are the one that wants to salvage the relationship you come away from counseling feeling like IT IS ALL YOU FAULT YOU COMPLETE PIECE IF SHIAT!!!!!

/marriage counseling=snake oil
//there may some good ones
///mine wasn't
////either of them

slashie limit reached
 
2014-05-15 12:56:01 PM
I know the feeling....
 
2014-05-15 12:58:32 PM

JuniorII: I can attest that the times that I felt most like stabbing my wife (ex) were immediately following our counseling (failed) sessions.

What a waste of time and money. If you are the one that wants to salvage the relationship you come away from counseling feeling like IT IS ALL YOU FAULT YOU COMPLETE PIECE IF SHIAT!!!!!

/marriage counseling=snake oil
//there may some good ones
///mine wasn't
////either of them

slashie limit reached


Just read my own post (I even previewed!) and apparently strong emotions make me splell and grammar not so goodly....
 
2014-05-15 01:01:35 PM

monoski: Jeanwell Napolean, 50, is accused of stabbing his wife several times in her left inner bicep, middle abdomen and lower back after she called her pastor to come over for some counseling.

How come the Jesus did step in to save her?
//Counseling based in religion does not sound like a solid idea


Honestly, I'm a bit surprised that it wasn't the pastor that got a stabbing.
 
2014-05-15 01:20:39 PM

IgG4: Couples therapy can be a horribly traumatic experience. My soon to be ex wife and I did months of it before we split. I didn't want to stab anybody afterwards, but it sure didn't leave us feeling lovey-dovey. Revisiting old wounds after years of dysfunction is not a fun process.


You mean its almost like they kept you there for as long as they could to get as much money out of your disfuntional relationship instead of trying to fix it they pick at the past and make it worse.
You dont say.
 
2014-05-15 01:23:23 PM
I we're getting a lot out of counseling this time.

Last time, my wife and councilor ganged up on me.  Then I discovered she saw him on the side, without me.  I was all like, "Why are you bringing that up?  We've never discussed that... WTF?"

/made me feel a little stabby
 
2014-05-15 01:29:07 PM
CSB-mode on

Back when I was married and things were on the rocks, my then-wife suggested we go to counselling. I agreed. We arrived and I found out that she'd actually been seeing this counselor for months and had been building a case to show that I was a horrible person who needed to change in order for her to be happy.

The session was awkward as when the counselor would ask me a question, my then-wife would often try to answer for me, only to be stopped by the counselor.

At the end of the session, the counselor suggested that while anything can be overcome if two people really want to make it work, was this something that we really wanted to work?

I moved out the next day. Best $250 I ever spent.
 
2014-05-15 01:45:27 PM

que.guero: CSB-mode on

Back when I was married and things were on the rocks, my then-wife suggested we go to counselling. I agreed. We arrived and I found out that she'd actually been seeing this counselor for months and had been building a case to show that I was a horrible person who needed to change in order for her to be happy.

The session was awkward as when the counselor would ask me a question, my then-wife would often try to answer for me, only to be stopped by the counselor.

At the end of the session, the counselor suggested that while anything can be overcome if two people really want to make it work, was this something that we really wanted to work?

I moved out the next day. Best $250 I ever spent.


I'm glad to know this shiat wasn't exclusive to me.  We worked it out, I'm glad your resolution suited you.
 
2014-05-15 01:46:04 PM

monoski: Jeanwell Napolean, 50, is accused of stabbing his wife several times in her left inner bicep, middle abdomen and lower back after she called her pastor to come over for some counseling.

How come the Jesus did step in to save her?
//Counseling based in religion does not sound like a solid idea


They turned to the pastor because her hairdresser was already booked.
 
2014-05-15 02:06:47 PM
If your intent in going to counseling is to convince your partner that he/she is the source of all of your unhappiness, and that everything will be fine if he/she will just change to make you happy, then you might as well just save the money.
 
2014-05-15 02:17:38 PM
Nothing solves complicated problems like discussing them with a disinterested third party.
 
2014-05-15 02:19:45 PM

RoyHobbs22: She must have won the battle that day, but obviously not the war.


img2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-05-15 02:20:05 PM

monoski: Jeanwell Napolean, 50, is accused of stabbing his wife several times in her left inner bicep, middle abdomen and lower back after she called her pastor to come over for some counseling.

How come the Jesus did step in to save her?
//Counseling based in religion does not sound like a solid idea


A priesthood friend of mine was called to a house for a suicidal young man, got shot gun pointed at him. He. Didn't run, but helped the young calm down and start working on the problem.

When clergy has good understanding of Christian teachings( I know a lot don't) and study how to counsel (which is more rare) they can be the perfect ones to call. I know a few who are awesome counselors. I also know a lot of clergy I wouldn't trust.
 
2014-05-15 02:48:05 PM
My ex kept going through counselors, each time saying she wasn't happy with the help being provided.  On about the fifth one I realized she was shopping for one that would agree with her.  I gave her one more chance.  We got a new counselor, and worked out what was supposed to be a temporary separation.  During a session, it became obvious that she was lying about everything and had no intention of keeping to the agreement.  She was using the temporary separation as a way to get me out but still pay all the bills.  I stood up and said, "there's obviously no reason for me to go along with this bullshiat anymore."  I walked out, and left her stranded.  That was the last time I saw her outside of a courtroom.

While I don't agree with the guy stabbing her, I understand.
 
2014-05-15 03:16:21 PM

lack of warmth: monoski: Jeanwell Napolean, 50, is accused of stabbing his wife several times in her left inner bicep, middle abdomen and lower back after she called her pastor to come over for some counseling.

How come the Jesus did step in to save her?
//Counseling based in religion does not sound like a solid idea

A priesthood friend of mine was called to a house for a suicidal young man, got shot gun pointed at him. He. Didn't run, but helped the young calm down and start working on the problem.

When clergy has good understanding of Christian teachings( I know a lot don't) and study how to counsel (which is more rare) they can be the perfect ones to call. I know a few who are awesome counselors. I also know a lot of clergy I wouldn't trust.


I would not say religion disqualifies them, if they have had actual training/education in counseling they would be a valid resource who has religious beliefs. Nothing wrong there.
 
2014-05-15 03:27:38 PM

que.guero: CSB-mode on

Back when I was married and things were on the rocks, my then-wife suggested we go to counselling. I agreed. We arrived and I found out that she'd actually been seeing this counselor for months and had been building a case to show that I was a horrible person who needed to change in order for her to be happy.

The session was awkward as when the counselor would ask me a question, my then-wife would often try to answer for me, only to be stopped by the counselor.

At the end of the session, the counselor suggested that while anything can be overcome if two people really want to make it work, was this something that we really wanted to work?

I moved out the next day. Best $250 I ever spent.


This is almost EXACTLY what happened during my first marriage (on my second... I'm a slow learner..). She had been seeing a councilor for a long time and finally got me to go in one evening. She made a big deal of it, made dinner before hand, tried to play up the nicey-nicey side... We went in, and for reasons that are still completely unclear to me, halfway through the councilor just laid the ever loving verbal smack down on her. She asked for a divorce that night after counseling and I was more than happy to oblige.
 
2014-05-15 03:41:31 PM

Zombies ate my neighbors: que.guero: CSB-mode on

Back when I was married and things were on the rocks, my then-wife suggested we go to counselling. I agreed. We arrived and I found out that she'd actually been seeing this counselor for months and had been building a case to show that I was a horrible person who needed to change in order for her to be happy.

The session was awkward as when the counselor would ask me a question, my then-wife would often try to answer for me, only to be stopped by the counselor.

At the end of the session, the counselor suggested that while anything can be overcome if two people really want to make it work, was this something that we really wanted to work?

I moved out the next day. Best $250 I ever spent.

This is almost EXACTLY what happened during my first marriage (on my second... I'm a slow learner..). She had been seeing a councilor for a long time and finally got me to go in one evening. She made a big deal of it, made dinner before hand, tried to play up the nicey-nicey side... We went in, and for reasons that are still completely unclear to me, halfway through the councilor just laid the ever loving verbal smack down on her. She asked for a divorce that night after counseling and I was more than happy to oblige.



Because the councilors aren't stupid and they see this bullshiat coming a mile away.  They know full well when somebody is just trying to hire a brain-plumber to "fix" their spouse for them.
 
2014-05-15 03:46:35 PM
Marriage counselors are like victim's advocates. They don't care about the truth, only that the woman gets hers.
 
2014-05-15 04:35:14 PM
Seems like their issues are pretty much resolved now, so I'd say it was good therapy.
 
2014-05-15 05:13:52 PM
sounds like the only logical thing to do is to sue the counselor
 
2014-05-16 01:42:53 AM
What this thread has taught me is that if you need a marriage counsellor, you may as well save the money and just divorce straight away.

Has anyone's troubled marriage been saved by counselling, ever?
 
2014-05-16 08:18:39 AM
My soon-to-be-ex wife told me, prior to the first and only session, to be honest with the counselor.

Afterwards, she told me that I was TOO honest, and that I betrayed her because the counselor (who was female) was obviously hitting on me during the session.

She's moving out in less than a month. Am I counting the days? One guess.
 
2014-05-16 08:58:25 AM

dpaul007: My soon-to-be-ex wife told me, prior to the first and only session, to be honest with the counselor.

Afterwards, she told me that I was TOO honest, and that I betrayed her because the counselor (who was female) was obviously hitting on me during the session.

She's moving out in less than a month. Am I counting the days? One guess.


got any pics?

(of her or the councillor)
 
Displayed 50 of 63 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report