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(Mother Nature Network)   Would you be willing to pay $100 if it meant you would never have to touch a germ-encrusted toilet handle again?   (mnn.com) divider line 73
    More: Obvious, Skymall, flushing toilets, Kohler  
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7786 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 May 2014 at 9:15 AM (28 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



73 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-05-11 03:24:29 AM  
In my own home?
Are they insane?
 
2014-05-11 03:53:39 AM  
No.
 
2014-05-11 05:31:49 AM  
Yeah but, where am I going to stack the magazines then?
 
2014-05-11 06:00:15 AM  
Cool.
Now I can take a dump and play the theremin at the same time.
 
2014-05-11 07:01:12 AM  

bearded clamorer: Cool.
Now I can take a dump and play the theremin at the same time.


Imagine how much cooler it would be to drop a log with OOOOOOOOO-WEEEEEEEEE-OOOOOOOOOO in the background.
 
2014-05-11 07:46:06 AM  
In a recent study of 800 U.S. consumers, we found that 51 percent of people surveyed are paranoid about germs in the bathroom. When looking at that same sample group but focusing on moms with children, that number jumps up to 65 percent.

I'd really like to know just how that question was worded to be able to come up with 50% paranoid about bathroom germs, especially considering that we're talking about their own home's bathrooms here.  As for the 65% of moms though, that one is a bit more believable (sadly). Depending on the ages of the mothers (mid-late 20s), the age & quantity of the children that they have (1-2 under the age of 5), and one other key demographic (stay at home mom & family income enough that spending $100 to not flush their own toilet is an acceptable use of that money), unfortunately I can see that one being accurate.

I can easily see the vapid twits who (with thanks it seems to a 24/7/365 got to fill the airtime with 'something' news cycle, Oprah, Dr Phil & others), can mentally turn a man innocently sitting in a park reading a book & eating his lunch into a sex offender just waiting to grab her snowflakes & sell them into slavery, freaking out after finding out that there is .... oh, I can't believe it .... bacteria (gasp) in a bathroom.  Sadly, that I can believe.

As for me though, I'm going to keep on flushing the old fashioned way & then wash up as usual after.  Not only do I have better things to do with $100 but I've also got a decent immune system developed by... exposure to those same germs that soccer mommy is freaking out over.
 
2014-05-11 08:12:47 AM  
Except it's not available for dual flush models. That's all I've been installing for the last ten years.
 
2014-05-11 08:19:52 AM  
I reach back with a wad of paper to manually scrape shiat from my ass. The handle doesn't frighten me. Now, whether or not everything goes according to plan once I pull that handle can sometimes cause a little anxiety.
 
2014-05-11 08:49:35 AM  
There is a very good reason that I don't take sick very often, and that's *because* I touch germ-encrusted toilet handles.
 
2014-05-11 09:07:02 AM  
I originally read that as "gem-encrusted toilet handle," and was instantly jealous.
 
2014-05-11 09:17:23 AM  
BALLCOCK!!!!
 
2014-05-11 09:17:52 AM  
p7.storage.canalblog.com
'Tell me more.'
 
2014-05-11 09:18:22 AM  

fusillade762: bearded clamorer: Cool.
Now I can take a dump and play the theremin at the same time.

Imagine how much cooler it would be to drop a log with OOOOOOOOO-WEEEEEEEEE-OOOOOOOOOO in the background.


Buddy Holly?
 
2014-05-11 09:19:49 AM  

Snarfangel: I originally read that as "gem-encrusted toilet handle," and was instantly jealous.


Same, was very confused as to why it was off putting, assumed it was on some weird pedestal in Japan
 
2014-05-11 09:19:57 AM  
I put in dual flush at the house.  Makes me feel both environmentally responsible and through.  Great product.
 
2014-05-11 09:20:21 AM  
Gloves cost $100?

/drtfa
 
2014-05-11 09:20:34 AM  
You still have to wash your hands anyways, and besides people can just use a piece of toilet paper to touch the handles.
 
2014-05-11 09:21:12 AM  
People flush with the same hand they wipe/aim with?
 
2014-05-11 09:23:22 AM  
Hope it's piss-proof.
 
2014-05-11 09:24:02 AM  
Protip:  If you leave the stall door open you don't have to touch it on your way out.
 
2014-05-11 09:27:23 AM  
Is this for people who don't wash their hands before leaving the bathroom?  There is no rational reason for something like this to exist.
 
2014-05-11 09:27:36 AM  
That's what about foot is for. But God DAMN the man that invented those pushbutton ones
 
2014-05-11 09:35:02 AM  
..a simple-to-mount in-tank module that's compatible with most existing single-flush toilets (sorry, dedicated dual-flushers) of the non Ballcock valve variety

Sounds like this was invented by a farker.
 
2014-05-11 09:42:48 AM  
This would work for my GF kids that can't seem to remember to farming flush for whatever reason; now it's become some new encouraging toy. Although now I'd have another $100 on my water bill from them playing with the damn thing.
 
2014-05-11 09:43:38 AM  
It appears that the answer to "what happens when the batteries die?" is "You did leave the handle installed, didn't you?"


Subby: since I have to deal with a germ-phobic kid who refuses to flush.... yes, yes I would.
 
2014-05-11 09:44:27 AM  
How about cleaning the handle, you lazy asses?
 
2014-05-11 09:46:43 AM  

fanbladesaresharp: This would work for my GF kids that can't seem to remember to farming flush for whatever reason; now it's become some new encouraging toy. Although now I'd have another $100 on my water bill from them playing with the damn thing.


Farming flush? Is that a typo for farking, or something I don't know, like what the three seashells are for?

/Real question, not a flame
//Gluten Free kids? Maybe they need a special flush?
///Maybe that bit is a flame
 
2014-05-11 09:46:48 AM  
No. Because I am not insane.
 
2014-05-11 09:46:59 AM  

loser0: It appears that the answer to "what happens when the batteries die?" is "You did leave the handle installed, didn't you?"


Subby: since I have to deal with a germ-phobic kid who refuses to flush.... yes, yes I would.


It might help to inform them that the germs are typically worse if you leave them to sit there
How old are they exactly? Can you get away with "If you don't flush the toilet it'll crawl into your room at night"?
 
2014-05-11 09:52:01 AM  

zarker: It might help to inform them that the germs are typically worse if you leave them to sit there
How old are they exactly?


10, and I tried that already. Repeatedly.

Can you get away with "If you don't flush the toilet it'll crawl into your room at night"?


She's scared enough of the toilet as it is!
 
2014-05-11 09:53:49 AM  
Little trick I picked up when deployed on a ship:
images.quickblogcast.com
There's your flusher.

Why do you flush with your foot instead of your hand?  Because every once in a while, pressurized sewage systems explode when flushed.
 
2014-05-11 09:54:25 AM  

Rhino_man: Little trick I picked up when deployed on a ship:
[images.quickblogcast.com image 516x406]
There's your flusher.

Why do you flush with your foot instead of your hand?  Because every once in a while, pressurized sewage systems explode when flushed.


... and by explode, I mean erupt in a geyser of poo.
 
2014-05-11 09:54:37 AM  
Only a Ferguson has a man's flush..baaa-WOOSH!
 
2014-05-11 10:04:44 AM  
4.bp.blogspot.com
The only $100 I would be willing to pay to Not See.
 
2014-05-11 10:06:21 AM  

loser0: zarker: It might help to inform them that the germs are typically worse if you leave them to sit there
How old are they exactly?

10, and I tried that already. Repeatedly.

Can you get away with "If you don't flush the toilet it'll crawl into your room at night"?

She's scared enough of the toilet as it is!


Eh, just start leaving yours for her to find in return.
She'll either flush it, or become elated that you've accepted her lifestyle
 
2014-05-11 10:10:01 AM  

Tourney3p0: Is this for people who don't wash their hands before leaving the bathroom?  There is no rational reason for something like this to exist.


This.  Wash your damn hands.
 
2014-05-11 10:15:27 AM  
I've already got 500 into my toilet, I think I'm good. Got one of those bidet lids from Groupon little over a year back. Best investment for the hiney ever.
 
2014-05-11 10:16:24 AM  
Germ... encrusted?

Did it ever occur to you to clean your home from time to time, or are you one of those "are towels supposed to bend" types?
 
2014-05-11 10:18:32 AM  

Snarfangel: I originally read that as "gem-encrusted toilet handle," and was instantly jealous.


I'm glad I wasn't the only one.
 
2014-05-11 10:40:39 AM  
Neighbors yard doesn't have a handle anyway.
 
2014-05-11 10:47:36 AM  
Hmm, between the fact that I flush with my foot/shoe, and the fact that I'm about to wash my hands, I'm going with 'no.'
 
2014-05-11 10:58:31 AM  
I have NEVER in my life ever come across a toilet with a flush handle. Mostly buttons and a few pull strings. America is strange.
 
2014-05-11 10:58:33 AM  

Snarfangel: I originally read that as "gem-encrusted toilet handle," and was instantly jealous.


This is just about the epitome of '1st World Problems'.
 
2014-05-11 10:59:11 AM  

Relatively Obscure: I reach back with a wad of paper to manually scrape shiat from my ass. The handle doesn't frighten me. Now, whether or not everything goes according to plan once I pull that handle can sometimes cause a little anxiety.


Awesome post
 
2014-05-11 11:07:47 AM  

bearded clamorer: Cool.
Now I can take a dump and play the theremin at the same time.


For You!

http://femurdesign.com/theremin/
 
2014-05-11 11:15:20 AM  
Gotta love advertisements disguised as news articles.
 
2014-05-11 11:15:22 AM  
Until flushable wipes replace toilet paper or Japanese bidet toilets become the norm most people in the USA run around with clingons and poop pancacked in their crack. This is the most foul disgusting reality today is i n the age of asimo robots people us dry paper to smear feces on a hairy surface and consider this a cleaning method. Try wet wiping after dry wipe and youll puke at what you carry around.

I travel with flushable wipes and I can detect you foul third world smells you troglodyte animal dry wipers.
 
2014-05-11 11:23:02 AM  

loser0: fanbladesaresharp: This would work for my GF kids that can't seem to remember to farming flush for whatever reason; now it's become some new encouraging toy. Although now I'd have another $100 on my water bill from them playing with the damn thing.

Farming flush? Is that a typo for farking, or something I don't know, like what the three seashells are for?

/Real question, not a flame
//Gluten Free kids? Maybe they need a special flush?
///Maybe that bit is a flame


A farming flush is when you've run the drain from the toilet out to your garden so that the shiat will fertilize your plants.

Duh.

/What, wasn't I supposed to do that?
 
2014-05-11 11:32:18 AM  

zeio: Until flushable wipes replace toilet paper or Japanese bidet toilets become the norm most people in the USA run around with clingons and poop pancacked in their crack. This is the most foul disgusting reality today is i n the age of asimo robots people us dry paper to smear feces on a hairy surface and consider this a cleaning method. Try wet wiping after dry wipe and youll puke at what you carry around.

I travel with flushable wipes and I can detect you foul third world smells you troglodyte animal dry wipers.


www.biobidet.com
 
2014-05-11 11:34:51 AM  
anyone else read it as "gem-encrusted" and thought this was about 1%'ers?
 
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