If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Independent)   University of Copenhagen study indicates married farkers will die early but at least then they'll get some farking peace and quiet   (independent.co.uk) divider line 17
    More: Scary  
•       •       •

641 clicks; posted to Geek » on 09 May 2014 at 11:21 PM (16 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



17 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-05-09 11:36:50 PM
45 and never married. I'm going to live fore...*thunk*
 
2014-05-09 11:47:55 PM
Not actually what the study said. Other studies have shown married men live longer. The trick is not to get married while your young enough to screw around, but not wait so long that the social cupboard is bare (and you end up with a naggy coont).
 
2014-05-09 11:58:08 PM

SacriliciousBeerSwiller: Not actually what the study said. Other studies have shown married men live longer. The trick is not to get married while your young enough to screw around, but not wait so long that the social cupboard is bare (and you end up with a naggy coont).


Thanks for captioning my life.
 
2014-05-10 12:50:14 AM
If my wife ever finds out about my girlfriend, I'm a dead man.
 
2014-05-10 01:04:10 AM
If you got a lady and you want her gone
But you ain't got the guts
She keeps naggin' at you night and day
Enough to drive you nuts
Pick up the phone, leave her alone
It's time you made a stand...
 
2014-05-10 02:07:00 AM
Married men live longer than single men.  Married men are also more willing to die.

/divorced
 
2014-05-10 04:44:11 AM

SacriliciousBeerSwiller: Not actually what the study said. Other studies have shown married men live longer. The trick is not to get married while your young enough to screw around, but not wait so long that the social cupboard is bare (and you end up with a naggy coont).


AbiNormal: SacriliciousBeerSwiller: Not actually what the study said. Other studies have shown married men live longer. The trick is not to get married while your young enough to screw around, but not wait so long that the social cupboard is bare (and you end up with a naggy coont).

Thanks for captioning my life.


Wait a couple more years. Some old friends will start finding themselves divorced or widowed. Of course, they will now have less physical attractiveness than they once did in most cases. Since you will no longer be so busy trying not to get caught looking down their blouse that whatever comes out of their mouths barely registers, you will start to be much more conscious of what lame coonts they are. This is why they were married to someone other than you in the first place.
 
2014-05-10 06:09:18 AM
University of Copenhagen study indicates married farkers will die early but at least then they'll get some

.
End of sentence right there
 
2014-05-10 08:26:53 AM
 I was only with my ex for 20 years, but it felt like a Goddamn eternity.
 
2014-05-10 08:42:25 AM

forgotmydamnusername: Some old friends will start finding themselves divorced or widowed. Of course, they will now have less physical attractiveness than they once did in most cases. Since you will no longer be so busy trying not to get caught looking down their blouse that whatever comes out of their mouths barely registers, you will start to be much more conscious of what lame coonts they are.


Except that lots of old friends are taking better care of themselves, and so 42-year-olds who looked all saggy or fat or overtanned or matronly back in the day are not as common as they used to be, compared to 42-year-olds who still look damn fine...
 
2014-05-10 09:35:06 AM
Old Joke:
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
 
2014-05-10 10:42:20 AM
With Medicare and Social Security coming at me in a rush, I'll worry about dying in middle age next time.
 
2014-05-10 11:43:34 AM

Gulper Eel: forgotmydamnusername: Some old friends will start finding themselves divorced or widowed. Of course, they will now have less physical attractiveness than they once did in most cases. Since you will no longer be so busy trying not to get caught looking down their blouse that whatever comes out of their mouths barely registers, you will start to be much more conscious of what lame coonts they are.

Except that lots of old friends are taking better care of themselves, and so 42-year-olds who looked all saggy or fat or overtanned or matronly back in the day are not as common as they used to be, compared to 42-year-olds who still look damn fine...


Given obesity rates - I remain VERY skeptical of this claim :)

I mean, overtanned, sure that comes and goes depending on the decade and how popular it is.  But 40 year-olds are fatter now than they've EVER been.
 
2014-05-10 12:40:40 PM

Gulper Eel: forgotmydamnusername: Some old friends will start finding themselves divorced or widowed. Of course, they will now have less physical attractiveness than they once did in most cases. Since you will no longer be so busy trying not to get caught looking down their blouse that whatever comes out of their mouths barely registers, you will start to be much more conscious of what lame coonts they are.

Except that lots of old friends are taking better care of themselves, and so 42-year-olds who looked all saggy or fat or overtanned or matronly back in the day are not as common as they used to be, compared to 42-year-olds who still look damn fine...


The vast majority of my old acquaintances smoked for at least 20 years, and some still do. There were also a good number of drunks and dope fiends. I know 3, or on a good day, 4 women between 40 and 50 I could still imagine screwing with the lights on. Of those, 2 are actually single, but insane enough that I don't think I could stand to be with them for more than about 3 months. Everybody else is tore UP. Of course, I ain't as pretty as I used to be, either, so some allowances must be made. Living in something resembling the real world, and being able to hold up her end of a conversation have come to seem a lot more important. Even so, my standards probably remain studman69-level unreasonable.
 
2014-05-10 02:02:36 PM

SacriliciousBeerSwiller: Not actually what the study said. Other studies have shown married men live longer. The trick is not to get married while your young enough to screw around, but not wait so long that the social cupboard is bare (and you end up with a naggy coont).


No it only FEELS longer...
:-)

/I love you sweety, please put down the stick
 
2014-05-10 09:20:21 PM

Fark_Guy_Rob: Given obesity rates - I remain VERY skeptical of this claim :)

I mean, overtanned, sure that comes and goes depending on the decade and how popular it is.  But 40 year-olds are fatter now than they've EVER been.


The richer people get, the thinner they get (and thus, the more physically appealing they are) is also a long-standing rule. Chances are that if you've done reasonably well for yourself, then so have the people in your socioeconomic circle, and the only time you cross paths with the hosebeasts is at Walmart.
 
2014-05-11 06:09:50 AM

SordidEuphemism: Old Joke:
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.


why do women live longer than men ? They don't have wives...
 
Displayed 17 of 17 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report