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(Toronto Sun)   So it turns out that Rob Ford didn't actually go to rehab and nobody knows where he is hiding. If everyone could please check your local bus stations and under your highway overpasses the city of Toronto would be very grateful   (torontosun.com) divider line 139
    More: Interesting  
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5630 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 May 2014 at 11:34 AM (33 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-05-06 10:19:03 AM  
Perhaps he's hiking the Appalachian Trail?
 
2014-05-06 10:27:26 AM  
"U.S. (Customs and Border Protection) confirmed to us that Mayor Ford arrived in Chicago last Thursday and that after discussion with US CBP he withdrew his request to enter the USA and departed," Norton told the Sun.

So he was denied entry and chose to accept the standard offer to voluntarily withdraw his visa application.  And yet Justin Bieber is still allowed freedom of travel.

There is no justice.
 
2014-05-06 10:44:58 AM  
Why do I get the impression that Blob Ford is on the mother of all benders right now? I imagine he's up to his fat ass in booze, crack, poutine & hookers somewhere in Montreal.
 
2014-05-06 10:48:50 AM  

oldfarthenry: Why do I get the impression that Blob Ford is on the mother of all benders right now? I imagine he's up to his fat ass in booze, crack, poutine & hookers somewhere in Montreal.


I believe they call that a "Nombre Cinq" up on the Rue de St. Catherine.
 
2014-05-06 11:17:46 AM  

oldfarthenry: Why do I get the impression that Blob Ford is on the mother of all benders right now? I imagine he's up to his fat ass in booze, crack, poutine & hookers somewhere in Montreal.


That's my estimation.  On a bender, somewhere in Canada.
 
2014-05-06 11:22:36 AM  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: oldfarthenry: Why do I get the impression that Blob Ford is on the mother of all benders right now? I imagine he's up to his fat ass in booze, crack, poutine & hookers somewhere in Montreal.

I believe they call that a "Nombre Cinq" up on the Rue de St. Catherine.


Damn you. I'm sitting in a history class right now trying to stifle my laughter.
 
2014-05-06 11:28:50 AM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: oldfarthenry: Why do I get the impression that Blob Ford is on the mother of all benders right now? I imagine he's up to his fat ass in booze, crack, poutine & hookers somewhere in Montreal.

I believe they call that a "Nombre Cinq" up on the Rue de St. Catherine.

Damn you. I'm sitting in a history class right now trying to stifle my laughter.


Then why are you on Fark? Shouldn't you be paying attention to class?

/loved history classes
 
2014-05-06 11:36:13 AM  
Perhaps he is a motivational speaker, living in a van down by the river.
31.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-05-06 11:37:34 AM  
How in the hell can something THAT big hide?

/I mean, it's not like he's a plane.
 
2014-05-06 11:37:56 AM  
Hey, we got stuck with Ted Cruz and Bieber - as entertaining as he is, you can keep Rob Ford.
 
2014-05-06 11:38:24 AM  
Check with Lindsey Lohan
 
2014-05-06 11:38:27 AM  

Snarfangel: Perhaps he is a motivational speaker, living in a van down by the river.
[31.media.tumblr.com image 364x273]


Damn you!  You beat me to it, word for word.

I think that it's one of life's cruel jokes that Chris Farley isn't alive to play Rob Ford's character.
 
2014-05-06 11:38:46 AM  
Wherever he is, I'm willing to bet there's a dead hooker not far away.
 
2014-05-06 11:39:38 AM  

CJHardin: Snarfangel: Perhaps he is a motivational speaker, living in a van down by the river.
[31.media.tumblr.com image 364x273]

Damn you!  You beat me to it, word for word.

I think that it's one of life's cruel jokes that Chris Farley isn't alive to play Rob Ford's character.



That would have been absolutely hilarious. :D
 
2014-05-06 11:41:42 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: "U.S. (Customs and Border Protection) confirmed to us that Mayor Ford arrived in Chicago last Thursday and that after discussion with US CBP he withdrew his request to enter the USA and departed," Norton told the Sun.

So he was denied entry and chose to accept the standard offer to voluntarily withdraw his visa application.  And yet Justin Bieber is still allowed freedom of travel.

There is no justice.


Here's what I don't get.  US CBP is in most major Canadian airports so he would have arrived in Chicago as a domestic passenger and not have had any contact with them.  Unless he flew in a private plane or some small Canadian airport, but does the mayor of Toronto have that kind of pull?
 
2014-05-06 11:41:47 AM  
YOU elected him, Toronto. YOU find him.
 
2014-05-06 11:41:52 AM  

oldfarthenry: Why do I get the impression that Blob Ford is on the mother of all benders right now? I imagine he's up to his fat ass in booze, crack, poutine & hookers somewhere in Montreal.


Impression? If that fat sack isn't on a bender, he's already dead.

I bet he got stuck on the "I'll just have one more before rehab" Failtrain.
 
2014-05-06 11:41:54 AM  

namegoeshere: Wherever he is, I'm willing to bet there's a dead hooker not far away.


i.huffpost.com
"Oh f*ck, what did I do??!?! How f*cking high was I?"
 
2014-05-06 11:42:31 AM  

oldfarthenry: Why do I get the impression that Blob Ford is on the mother of all benders right now? I imagine he's up to his fat ass in booze, crack, poutine & hookers somewhere in Montreal.


But Dougie says he's "in a program" and "losing weight". And Dougie would never lie to the press, ever. My guess is that he's at the family cottage on a bender, waiting for the whole scandal to blow over.

If you find Mayor McCrackhead, keep him. Now that he's gone we may be able to have an adult conversation about how to move Toronto forward.
 
2014-05-06 11:42:33 AM  
bestofmeanwhilein.com
 
2014-05-06 11:43:21 AM  
Check Toronto's city morgue for bloated John Doe corpses testing positive for a cocktail of illegal drugs.
 
2014-05-06 11:44:10 AM  
So he's with Amy Winehouse?
 
2014-05-06 11:44:56 AM  
Offer to loan him money. He will come out.
 
2014-05-06 11:45:45 AM  

jmayson: Benevolent Misanthrope: "U.S. (Customs and Border Protection) confirmed to us that Mayor Ford arrived in Chicago last Thursday and that after discussion with US CBP he withdrew his request to enter the USA and departed," Norton told the Sun.

So he was denied entry and chose to accept the standard offer to voluntarily withdraw his visa application.  And yet Justin Bieber is still allowed freedom of travel.

There is no justice.

Here's what I don't get.  US CBP is in most major Canadian airports so he would have arrived in Chicago as a domestic passenger and not have had any contact with them.  Unless he flew in a private plane or some small Canadian airport, but does the mayor of Toronto have that kind of pull?


He flew out of a small airport on a private plane and landed at Midway in Chicago, he would need to clear customs there.
 
2014-05-06 11:45:59 AM  
Perhaps Mayor Bombaclott took a Caribbean Airlines flight to Jamaica to be with his people.
Hey Ford: if you are in Kingston, check out 'Tracks & Records', Usian Bolt's restaurant.   Good food.  Try not to get shot wandering around the downtown though.
 
2014-05-06 11:47:04 AM  
Did anyone look in Sunnyvale?
 
2014-05-06 11:52:41 AM  
Sooner or later (probably sooner) he's going to wind up dead due to his additions or questionable company. If that happens, I wonder if his brother will run for mayor and get swept in by the Ford Nation and some amount of sympathy voting.
 
2014-05-06 11:53:25 AM  

ObscureNameHere: Perhaps Mayor Bombaclott took a Caribbean Airlines flight to Jamaica to be with his people.
Hey Ford: if you are in Kingston, check out 'Tracks & Records', Usian Bolt's restaurant.   Good food.  Try not to get shot wandering around the downtown though.


Scotchies ... Jerk chicken and jerk pork go well with crack and booze.
 
2014-05-06 11:55:19 AM  

EngineerAU: Sooner or later (probably sooner) he's going to wind up dead due to his additions or questionable company. If that happens, I wonder if his brother will run for mayor and get swept in by the Ford Nation and some amount of sympathy voting.


His brother has no chance of winning, or capturing the Ford Nation vote. He has the charisma of a rock, and doesn't have the history with voters like Rob did.
 
2014-05-06 11:55:32 AM  

Yaw String: ObscureNameHere: Perhaps Mayor Bombaclott took a Caribbean Airlines flight to Jamaica to be with his people.
Hey Ford: if you are in Kingston, check out 'Tracks & Records', Usian Bolt's restaurant.   Good food.  Try not to get shot wandering around the downtown though.

Scotchies ... Jerk chicken and jerk pork go well with crack and booze.


Yah, Scotchies too.  Nothing to fatten you up like a Red Stripe and some of that festival bread. :)
 
2014-05-06 11:55:39 AM  
Ford =
Fixed
Or
Rehabbed
Daily
 
2014-05-06 11:57:10 AM  
He's out there somewhere.   We may never see him again, but we'll hear rumors of him from time to time.

When a family of four gets a flat and a large, mysterious stranger fixes it for them.

When a young man thought about suicide as he sat all alone, but is talked out of it by a man with no name.

When a small town is saved from a rowdy motorcycle gang by an unknown drifter.

We'll hear the rumors.  We'll know he's out there.

Helping the common folk.  Writing wrongs.  Smoking crack.
 
2014-05-06 11:57:15 AM  

Nothing To See Here: Ford =
Fixed
Or
Rehabbed
Daily


nope the original still applies

Found
On
Road
Dead

or at least he will be if he keeps up the drinking and driving.
 
2014-05-06 11:58:11 AM  
Given his obesity, plus fits of drug and drink fueled raging, I think mother nature will stop him with a heart attack, stroke, embolism  or aneurism if he keeps on his present course.
 
2014-05-06 11:58:33 AM  
he said no no no
 
2014-05-06 12:03:50 PM  

Pope Larry II: jmayson: Benevolent Misanthrope: "U.S. (Customs and Border Protection) confirmed to us that Mayor Ford arrived in Chicago last Thursday and that after discussion with US CBP he withdrew his request to enter the USA and departed," Norton told the Sun.

So he was denied entry and chose to accept the standard offer to voluntarily withdraw his visa application.  And yet Justin Bieber is still allowed freedom of travel.

There is no justice.

Here's what I don't get.  US CBP is in most major Canadian airports so he would have arrived in Chicago as a domestic passenger and not have had any contact with them.  Unless he flew in a private plane or some small Canadian airport, but does the mayor of Toronto have that kind of pull?

He flew out of a small airport on a private plane and landed at Midway in Chicago, he would need to clear customs there.


And to add: a guy with a net worth of $50M (inherited) has that kind of pull, not to mention a house in Chicago, which is probably where he was running to to hide out.
 
2014-05-06 12:03:51 PM  
Why are this guy's antics still news?  I thought he was stripped of all power last year, because Toronto had no way to recall him.  isn't he just a figurehead until the next election?
 
2014-05-06 12:04:00 PM  

That Guy What Stole the Bacon: Perhaps he's hiking the Appalachian Trail?


I can send a text to my friend he is on the trail now that lucky son of a whore.


Ford is with Bieber smoking crack and eating poutine.
 
2014-05-06 12:05:54 PM  
He and Charlie Sheen will team up to do a ustream show
 
2014-05-06 12:06:25 PM  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: oldfarthenry: Why do I get the impression that Blob Ford is on the mother of all benders right now? I imagine he's up to his fat ass in booze, crack, poutine & hookers somewhere in Montreal.

I believe they call that a "Nombre Numéro Cinq" up on the Rue de St. Catherine.


/yeah, I'm that guy
//It's actually a Numéro Trois; a Numéro Cinq includes kechup-flavoured chips and a Pepsi.
 
2014-05-06 12:07:28 PM  
I think you'll have better luck checking the crack houses.
 
2014-05-06 12:08:24 PM  
I'm guessing he had something in his bags that he didn't want customs agents to find out about.  I wonder what that could have been?
 
2014-05-06 12:08:59 PM  
I'm willing to bet he had no reservations at any rehab facilities in Chicago, or anywhere else in the US. Add in his record in Florida, and I can understand why a Border security agent would say "Thanks, but No"

It would be funny if they detected drugs or residue on his luggage or person, and that was why he was denied entry

/do you make reservations at rehab?
 
2014-05-06 12:09:00 PM  

raerae1980: ecmoRandomNumbers: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: oldfarthenry: Why do I get the impression that Blob Ford is on the mother of all benders right now? I imagine he's up to his fat ass in booze, crack, poutine & hookers somewhere in Montreal.

I believe they call that a "Nombre Cinq" up on the Rue de St. Catherine.

Damn you. I'm sitting in a history class right now trying to stifle my laughter.

Then why are you on Fark? Shouldn't you be paying attention to class?

/loved history classes


No. Subbing. It's such a no-brainer job. If I'm not showing a video, I'm just passing out worksheets. The teachers who know me leave me plans on what they want taught, and I just write a synopsis of the lecture. The ones who don't know me usually just leave babysitting instructions. Unfortunately, I'm just babysitting right now while they work on worksheets.
 
2014-05-06 12:09:29 PM  
See ya later, suckers!

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-05-06 12:09:34 PM  

jmayson: Benevolent Misanthrope: "U.S. (Customs and Border Protection) confirmed to us that Mayor Ford arrived in Chicago last Thursday and that after discussion with US CBP he withdrew his request to enter the USA and departed," Norton told the Sun.

So he was denied entry and chose to accept the standard offer to voluntarily withdraw his visa application.  And yet Justin Bieber is still allowed freedom of travel.

There is no justice.

Here's what I don't get.  US CBP is in most major Canadian airports so he would have arrived in Chicago as a domestic passenger and not have had any contact with them.  Unless he flew in a private plane or some small Canadian airport, but does the mayor of Toronto have that kind of pull?


Porter airlines flies out of Toronto Island to Midway and unlike Pearson you don't pre-clear customs there.

Porter's really convenient but the customs line on landing can be a biatch if you're unlucky and behind a major international flight, though sometimes they take pity on the Canadians and put us in the line with the Americans.
 
2014-05-06 12:11:31 PM  
he pulled a d.b. cooper
 
2014-05-06 12:12:39 PM  

tricycleracer: [bestofmeanwhilein.com image 640x480]


DAM GAY MARRIAGE! We told you it is a slippery slope.
 
2014-05-06 12:14:58 PM  
Toronto Sun's rumor of the day is he's in Guelph:  http://www.torontosun.com/2014/05/06/is-rob-ford-at-guelph-rehab-faci l ity

...but really, it's the Sun.
 
2014-05-06 12:15:09 PM  

medius: he pulled a d.b. cooper


No way, a parachute that big woulda been spotted from Panama, and if he jumped sans chute the impact......
 
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