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(Mother Nature Network)   The next time you get passed over for a promotion at work, just remember that a library card is just as good as a pay raise   (mnn.com ) divider line
    More: Unlikely, Laura Ingalls Wilder, research question, Jane Eyre  
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5813 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 May 2014 at 1:45 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2014-05-06 02:22:48 AM  
That statement is as stupid as saying I don't need a raise because there's a sale at Pennys.
I've had a library card since I was 5 years old, and have never considered it as part of my salary.

Besides, it's already my library that was built with my tax dollars.
 
2014-05-06 01:47:25 PM  
Perhaps there should be a Social Policy that gives +1 Happiness to science buildings in the Rationalism tree.
 
2014-05-06 01:48:07 PM  
shechive.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-05-06 01:49:01 PM  
Boss logic - GTFO!
 
2014-05-06 01:49:24 PM  
Dumbest shiat I have ever read guess thats what I should expect from mother nature news.
 
2014-05-06 01:49:59 PM  
It's no hot cocoa sampler box.
 
2014-05-06 01:51:44 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-05-06 01:51:58 PM  
i1.cpcache.com
 
2014-05-06 01:52:26 PM  
Just saved on home wifi and slightly rusty cool water costs.
 
2014-05-06 01:53:12 PM  
I'm not sure we can measure "wellbeing." And if we can't measure it, how can we assign a dollar amount to it?
 
2014-05-06 01:54:49 PM  

TommyymmoT: That statement is as stupid as saying I don't need a raise because there's a sale at Pennys.


And Leon's getting larger!
 
2014-05-06 01:55:06 PM  
Libraries have always depressed me and I get in and out of them as quickly as possible. But then so does work.

People still get promotions and raises? These days just about the only way to get more money or a better job is to change companies.
 
2014-05-06 01:56:08 PM  

August11: I'm not sure we can measure "wellbeing." And if we can't measure it, how can we assign a dollar amount to it?


Bhutan claims to focus on Gross National Happiness.
 
2014-05-06 01:56:13 PM  
I have never met a normal human that called their books "friends"....shudder.....they do often smell like cat piss though....so they have that going for them.

/increased my mp3 music collection by about 100 albums by going to the liberry.
 
2014-05-06 01:58:27 PM  

August11: I'm not sure we can measure "wellbeing."


Of course we can measure "wellbeing".  It's just complicated.
 
2014-05-06 01:59:50 PM  
As an employee of a library system I have to agree! Some amazing benefits of visiting your local library are as follows:

1) Hordes of unsupervised feral children climbing on unconscious homeless people like they are shiatty furniture.

B) DVDs of all the tv shows and movies you're too stupid to realize are on Netflix and Hulu!

1) Heating and Air conditioning so you can be comfortable after you've given up on life because your high school garage band fell apart.

4) Bathrooms were you can hook up with a stranger and when caught you get the extra fun of telling staff members "It's ok, she's my sister!"

3) Internet connections so you can masturbate in public to videos of women giving birth.

25) Human interaction disguised as arguing over 25 cents and the fact that life was better in the 50's!
 
2014-05-06 02:01:12 PM  

Xenomech: August11: I'm not sure we can measure "wellbeing."

Of course we can measure "wellbeing".  It's just complicated.


My well-being is bigger than your well-being.
 
2014-05-06 02:02:10 PM  

MooseBayou: Xenomech: August11: I'm not sure we can measure "wellbeing."

Of course we can measure "wellbeing".  It's just complicated.

My well-being is bigger than your well-being.


My well-being is so big, I need to carry it in a wheelbarrow.
 
2014-05-06 02:02:55 PM  

cgraves67: Perhaps there should be a Social Policy that gives +1 Happiness to science buildings in the Rationalism tree.


Just give Libraries +1 img3.wikia.nocookie.net Local Happiness in addition to the +1 img2.wikia.nocookie.net Science they already do. Maybe make it part of the Freedom Ideology tree.
 
2014-05-06 02:03:35 PM  
Walking through the stacks, I would mentally wave to old friends like Jane Eyre, Danny Torrence and Laura Ingalls Wilder ...

3.bp.blogspot.com

I'm mentally waving right now.  Can you see me way over here?
 
2014-05-06 02:03:59 PM  

Princess Poo Hands: MooseBayou: Xenomech: August11: I'm not sure we can measure "wellbeing."

Of course we can measure "wellbeing".  It's just complicated.

My well-being is bigger than your well-being.

My well-being is so big, I need to carry it in a wheelbarrow.


I shared my well-being with your mom last night.
 
2014-05-06 02:04:34 PM  
Well, of course going to the library is as good as having a job.

Just ask your local homeless person.
 
2014-05-06 02:04:52 PM  

Scyllz: As an employee of a library system I have to agree! Some amazing benefits of visiting your local library are as follows:

1) Hordes of unsupervised feral children climbing on unconscious homeless people like they are shiatty furniture.

B) DVDs of all the tv shows and movies you're too stupid to realize are on Netflix and Hulu!

1) Heating and Air conditioning so you can be comfortable after you've given up on life because your high school garage band fell apart.

4) Bathrooms were you can hook up with a stranger and when caught you get the extra fun of telling staff members "It's ok, she's my sister!"

3) Internet connections so you can masturbate in public to videos of women giving birth.

25) Human interaction disguised as arguing over 25 cents and the fact that life was better in the 50's!


Math doesn't seem to be your strong point.
 
2014-05-06 02:05:16 PM  

Crass and Jaded Mother Farker: Well, of course going to the library is as good as having a job.

Just ask your local homeless person.


They don't go to the LIBRARY. They go to the six pack store to buy 40s of Mickey.
 
2014-05-06 02:06:50 PM  

Scyllz: Hordes of unsupervised feral children climbing on unconscious homeless people like they are shiatty furniture.


s-ak.buzzfed.com
/he woke up
 
2014-05-06 02:07:17 PM  

Scyllz: As an employee of a library system I have to agree! Some amazing benefits of visiting your local library are as follows:

1) Hordes of unsupervised feral children climbing on unconscious homeless people like they are shiatty furniture.

B) DVDs of all the tv shows and movies you're too stupid to realize are on Netflix and Hulu!

1) Heating and Air conditioning so you can be comfortable after you've given up on life because your high school garage band fell apart.

4) Bathrooms were you can hook up with a stranger and when caught you get the extra fun of telling staff members "It's ok, she's my sister!"

3) Internet connections so you can masturbate in public to videos of women giving birth.

25) Human interaction disguised as arguing over 25 cents and the fact that life was better in the 50's!


Why does someone else always get the fun jobs?
 
2014-05-06 02:12:07 PM  

buckeyebrain: Scyllz: As an employee of a library system I have to agree! Some amazing benefits of visiting your local library are as follows:

1) Hordes of unsupervised feral children climbing on unconscious homeless people like they are shiatty furniture.

B) DVDs of all the tv shows and movies you're too stupid to realize are on Netflix and Hulu!

1) Heating and Air conditioning so you can be comfortable after you've given up on life because your high school garage band fell apart.

4) Bathrooms were you can hook up with a stranger and when caught you get the extra fun of telling staff members "It's ok, she's my sister!"

3) Internet connections so you can masturbate in public to videos of women giving birth.

25) Human interaction disguised as arguing over 25 cents and the fact that life was better in the 50's!

Math doesn't seem to be your strong point.


I believe he's paraphrasing from Animal house.  Or, maybe it IS just bad math.  Math?  Matheson.
 
2014-05-06 02:12:07 PM  

JackieRabbit: Scyllz: As an employee of a library system I have to agree! Some amazing benefits of visiting your local library are as follows:

1) Hordes of unsupervised feral children climbing on unconscious homeless people like they are shiatty furniture.

B) DVDs of all the tv shows and movies you're too stupid to realize are on Netflix and Hulu!

1) Heating and Air conditioning so you can be comfortable after you've given up on life because your high school garage band fell apart.

4) Bathrooms were you can hook up with a stranger and when caught you get the extra fun of telling staff members "It's ok, she's my sister!"

3) Internet connections so you can masturbate in public to videos of women giving birth.

25) Human interaction disguised as arguing over 25 cents and the fact that life was better in the 50's!

Why does someone else always get the fun jobs?


Because Jesus hates you.
 
2014-05-06 02:17:38 PM  

buckeyebrain: Scyllz: As an employee of a library system I have to agree! Some amazing benefits of visiting your local library are as follows:

1) Hordes of unsupervised feral children climbing on unconscious homeless people like they are shiatty furniture.

B) DVDs of all the tv shows and movies you're too stupid to realize are on Netflix and Hulu!

1) Heating and Air conditioning so you can be comfortable after you've given up on life because your high school garage band fell apart.

4) Bathrooms were you can hook up with a stranger and when caught you get the extra fun of telling staff members "It's ok, she's my sister!"

3) Internet connections so you can masturbate in public to videos of women giving birth.

25) Human interaction disguised as arguing over 25 cents and the fact that life was better in the 50's!

Math doesn't seem to be your strong point.


Knowledge B Intuitionism & Bergsonism  Library operations.
makes perfect sense!
 
2014-05-06 02:30:10 PM  
I used to have my own library card and never found the headline to be the case.  However, when I started stealing other people's library card, using them to check out oodles of books to be sold on ebay, I began to realize the truth behind the headline.
 
2014-05-06 02:31:17 PM  
Forget the article, I loved the advert at the bottom "Bras don't actually work, says French study"
 
2014-05-06 02:32:46 PM  

Prey4reign: I used to have my own library card and never found the headline to be the case.  However, when I started stealing other people's library card, using them to check out oodles of books to be sold on ebay, I began to realize the truth behind the headline.


img.youtube.com
 
2014-05-06 02:47:09 PM  
Hello? Mastercard? Do you accept payment in library books?
 
2014-05-06 02:55:36 PM  
How the hell does anyone (who isn't homeless) get $191 in value from the library *EACH MONTH*.

Oh wait - they just pulled numbers out of their butt?  Ahh - gotcha.

// But I do like Safari Books...
 
2014-05-06 02:59:25 PM  

wildcardjack: August11: I'm not sure we can measure "wellbeing." And if we can't measure it, how can we assign a dollar amount to it?

Bhutan claims to focus on Gross National Happiness.


Shall we run away to there?

note: you need to make good dhosa
 
2014-05-06 03:00:36 PM  

Rurouni: Hello? Mastercard? Do you accept payment in library books?


Why are you in debt? According to the Fark Smarty Pants Brigade, there is no valid reason to be in debt and you should buy cars and houses with cash. Which you should be raking in hand over fist with your engineering degree, as all other degrees are worthless.

/I don't know why I'm posting this. Bored and cranky today.
 
2014-05-06 03:03:40 PM  

Fark_Guy_Rob: How the hell does anyone (who isn't homeless) get $191 in value from the library *EACH MONTH*.

Oh wait - they just pulled numbers out of their butt?  Ahh - gotcha.

// But I do like Safari Books...


My son and I read hundreds of ebooks and listened to dozens of audio books from our county library.  Now the problem is, we've read everything that interests us.  The cost of getting the same content from Amazon, especially audio books ain't cheap.
 
2014-05-06 03:07:54 PM  

Fark_Guy_Rob: How the hell does anyone (who isn't homeless) get $191 in value from the library *EACH MONTH*.


Free internet would save you about $70
 
2014-05-06 03:21:31 PM  

Scyllz: As an employee of a library system I have to agree! Some amazing benefits of visiting your local library are as follows:

1) Hordes of unsupervised feral children climbing on unconscious homeless people like they are shiatty furniture.

B) DVDs of all the tv shows and movies you're too stupid to realize are on Netflix and Hulu!

1) Heating and Air conditioning so you can be comfortable after you've given up on life because your high school garage band fell apart.

4) Bathrooms were you can hook up with a stranger and when caught you get the extra fun of telling staff members "It's ok, she's my sister!"

3) Internet connections so you can masturbate in public to videos of women giving birth.

25) Human interaction disguised as arguing over 25 cents and the fact that life was better in the 50's!


Uh...I don't know about you, but that last one is Fark.com, isn't it?
 
2014-05-06 03:23:29 PM  

TNel: Fark_Guy_Rob: How the hell does anyone (who isn't homeless) get $191 in value from the library *EACH MONTH*.

Free internet would save you about $70


Apples and oranges.

$70 would get you really fast broadband - straight to your home.  The free internet at the library doesn't provide the same service (unless your library is open 24/7, has a decent connection, always have available machines to use, doesn't filter sites, and allows you to download whatever you want).  And that assumes a zero cost in travelling to and from the library.

I don't know anyone who would pay $191 per month to use the library.  Maybe I'm wrong, but that would suggest the value isn't worth $191 per month.
 
2014-05-06 03:26:08 PM  

Heywood Jublowme: Dumbest shiat I have ever read guess thats what I should expect from mother nature news.


Look at the "why dogs tilt their heads' article...a winner in that catagory. GAH!
 
2014-05-06 03:32:55 PM  
Lies!
 
2014-05-06 03:40:32 PM  

Scyllz: Bathrooms were you can hook up with a stranger and when caught you get the extra fun of telling staff members "It's ok, she's my sister!"


Do we work at the same library?

/Happened a few weeks ago.
 
2014-05-06 03:52:41 PM  
farm6.static.flickr.com

Picture of author.
 
2014-05-06 04:19:43 PM  
What we hope the librarian will look like

encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com

What she looks like when there's trouble

encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
 
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