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(ARL Now)   Man convicted of assault on roommate who drew a penis on his face. With fantastic mugshot   (arlnow.com) divider line 126
    More: Followup, James Watson, dry-erase, Clarendon, marker pen  
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20656 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 May 2014 at 5:04 AM (17 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



126 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-05-03 11:49:18 PM
"He was an object of ridicule in jail that weekend because he still had the penis drawn on his face,"

Soon to be followed by an actual penis...
 
2014-05-04 12:08:06 AM
As a result of the assault, the victim suffered a broken nose, an eye that was swollen shut and other facial injuries, according to police and prosecutors.

"But you should see the other guy!"
 
2014-05-04 12:20:13 AM
Laugh?  I thought I'd kill you.
 
2014-05-04 12:20:15 AM
He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.
 
2014-05-04 12:33:29 AM

Riche: He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.


img.fark.net
 
2014-05-04 12:44:01 AM

Triumph: Riche: He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.

[img.fark.net image 250x247]


That's awesome.
 
2014-05-04 01:32:00 AM

violentsalvation: Triumph: Riche: He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.

[img.fark.net image 250x247]

That's awesome.


At least it has artistic merit.
 
2014-05-04 01:37:50 AM
He assaulted his roommate for a harmless prank? What a dickhead.
 
2014-05-04 02:08:07 AM
These men were in their 30s. How immature of them to still be pulling such juvenile pranks.
 
2014-05-04 02:38:43 AM
I bet he had just gotten home from getting trashed at Jay's.
 
2014-05-04 04:00:56 AM
fta Watson said he tried but could not remove the penis drawing from his face.

Just keep rubbing it. You'll get it off.
 
2014-05-04 04:27:20 AM
a3-images.myspacecdn.com
 
2014-05-04 04:33:46 AM

Triumph: Riche: He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.

[img.fark.net image 250x247]


Brilliant. I love it. Lmao.
 
2014-05-04 05:14:06 AM
mirror function on his phone

I guess I'm old.
 
2014-05-04 05:18:34 AM
Dude has let himself go since "3 O Clock High"
 
2014-05-04 05:19:35 AM
Repeat from a few months ago.


/remembers the mug shot.
 
2014-05-04 05:21:12 AM

Triumph: Riche: He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.

[img.fark.net image 250x247]


I can't stop watching! The face makes it.
 
2014-05-04 05:22:56 AM

sparkeyjames: Repeat from a few months ago.


/remembers the mug shot.


Follow up tag meet sparkeyjames, sparkeyjames meet the follow up tag.
 
2014-05-04 05:24:18 AM
we-share-everything.com
 
2014-05-04 05:26:06 AM

Betep: mirror function on his phone

I guess I'm old.


Oh, I know, right? These kids, Remember the good old days when you would have to walk all the way to the night privy closet and actually look in the looking-glass mounted over the lavabo?
 
2014-05-04 05:28:47 AM

Riche: He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.


Good idea. I would not vote to convict, either

Penis-drawer lucky he did not have more injuries. Penis drawer did a real dick move
 
2014-05-04 05:29:09 AM
Signs you might suck at life:

1.)  You are 30 and have roommates
2.)  You are 30 and still pass out on the couch with your shoes on after a night of drinking
3.)  You hang out with people who are either functionally retarded or liars (I swear, I tried it on my arm and it comes right off, so I drew a dick on his face....)

In any case - if you can easily remove the drawing - then it's a 'haha' funny prank.  The victim will go around and not know they have a dick on their face for a while.  haha, funny.  But once it's permanent or semi-permanent (after all, a tattoo of a dick on your face isn't permanent - it can be removed and, worst case, it only lasts about 60-70 years) it can be quite serious.  Most everyone with a job cannot go to work with a dick on their face.  Most people can't call up their boss and say, 'I need 3 weeks off work because I have a dick on my face that is slowly fadding'

Personally, I think everything that happened in the story is fair game.  House rule is if you fall asleep with shoes on, you get drawn on.  House rules should also include anyone doing the drawing gets the crap beat out of them.  Ironically, these were the house rules we followed when I was in college.  Depending on the marker - a black eye/broken nose will look normal in about the same time it takes for the drawing to fade completely.

// I bet the dude with the broken nose never draws another dick on a passed out drunk guy again.
/// Lesson learned
 
2014-05-04 05:31:25 AM
He looks like he came from out yonder, you know, a cok succer
 
2014-05-04 05:32:22 AM
Is the headline worded poorly or am I tired? I thought he got assault charges for drawing on somebody.
/I had one drawn on me in highlighter once, or so I'm told
 
2014-05-04 05:32:29 AM
Makes you wonder where else they put their dicks, rather than just on his face.
/men are victims of rape too.
 
2014-05-04 05:33:15 AM

Riche: He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.


Peremptory challenges during jury selection: how do they work?

/behind a keyboard, sure
//facing jail, don't bet on it
/// I assume, never been arrested
 
2014-05-04 05:33:47 AM
SevenizGud:
Things were going fine until some total farking asswipe had to go and do something stupid.

something stupid like draw a dick on some guys face?
 
2014-05-04 05:36:31 AM
Came here for some Dave Chapelle "we stuck a carrot up his ass".

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6uvg-ug9CvE
 
2014-05-04 06:03:17 AM

Riche: He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.


FTA: "The victim also told the jury that he had tested the marker on his arm before using it, and that the black mark had come right off. Watson said he tried but could not remove the penis drawing from his face."

Know how we know you didn't read the article?

CSB, I remember this happened to a guy at an apartment complex pool keg party. He wandered in to a neighbor friends apt. and proceeded to pass out on the floor, wearing just swim trunks. They wrote on his back: "I love sucking big black c*cks." (with a sharpie mind you). When he woke up he went back out to the pool for another beer and tried to act all suave with the bikini chicks. Hilarity ensued. He couldn't figure out who it was to punch when he finally was told about it.
 
2014-05-04 06:03:58 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: These men were in their 30s. How immature of them to still be pulling such juvenile pranks.


This
 
2014-05-04 06:12:34 AM
I thought it was international law that passing out with your shoes on warrants others to draw on you.
 
2014-05-04 06:25:58 AM
Yeah, well I bet the marker assault guy won't feel the need do it again. That ain't funny-he gets zero sympathy from me.
 
2014-05-04 06:27:38 AM

marksman: I thought it was international law that passing out with your shoes on warrants others to draw on you.


It is.
It's also international law that drawing on someone may result in an ass beating.
 
2014-05-04 06:30:31 AM

Triumph: Riche: He should have demanded a jury trial.

I wouldn't have voted to convict.


That is hilarious
 
2014-05-04 06:33:48 AM

highwayrun: Betep: mirror function on his phone

I guess I'm old.

Oh, I know, right? These kids, Remember the good old days when you would have to walk all the way to the night privy closet and actually look in the looking-glass mounted over the lavabo?


2 honest questions:
Mirror or phone?
Watch or phone?
 
2014-05-04 06:38:26 AM
This was handles correctly. the guy was convicted of assault, as he should have been, and the fact that he was provoked was acknowledged in the suspended sentence.
 
2014-05-04 06:42:33 AM

MysteryGuest: Yeah, well I bet the marker assault guy won't feel the need do it again. That ain't funny-he gets zero sympathy from me.


Grow up.
 
2014-05-04 06:43:12 AM
I thought this was grounds for justified homicide?
 
2014-05-04 06:43:19 AM

Fark_Guy_Rob: Signs you might suck at life:

1.)  You are 30 and have roommates


img.4plebs.org
/Maybe you own a home and rent a room for extra income
//Or you were laid off
///Or went though a nasty divorce
////I doubt any apply to these idiots but that's one of the most idiotic statements I've read on fark all morning
 
2014-05-04 06:44:26 AM
So what's up with all the men who draw dicks on everything?

Do they love the cock?
 
2014-05-04 06:45:44 AM

Creoena: Fark_Guy_Rob: Signs you might suck at life:

1.)  You are 30 and have roommates

[img.4plebs.org image 250x272]
/Maybe you own a home and rent a room for extra income
//Or you were laid off
///Or went though a nasty divorce
////I doubt any apply to these idiots but that's one of the most idiotic statements I've read on fark all morning


Pretty sure going through a nasty divorce is a sign you suck at life
 
2014-05-04 06:45:52 AM

Big Ramifications: MysteryGuest: Yeah, well I bet the marker assault guy won't feel the need do it again. That ain't funny-he gets zero sympathy from me.

Grow up.


Grow up? Really? He could have went full biatch and claimed sexual harassment. As it is, all he did was throw a few punches. Easy-peasy-Japaneasy. Should have ended there. Sometimes actions have consequences. Has this been a woman who had a dick drawn on her face, and said woman beat up the guy, I'm sure reactions would be different.
 
2014-05-04 06:52:39 AM

moothemagiccow: Creoena: Fark_Guy_Rob: Signs you might suck at life:

1.)  You are 30 and have roommates

[img.4plebs.org image 250x272]
/Maybe you own a home and rent a room for extra income
//Or you were laid off
///Or went though a nasty divorce
////I doubt any apply to these idiots but that's one of the most idiotic statements I've read on fark all morning

Pretty sure going through a nasty divorce is a sign you suck at life


So, the soldier who gets deployed to Afghanistan, Iraq, etc and comes back to find his wife divorcing him because he "wasn't around enough" sucks at life?
 
2014-05-04 06:53:16 AM

robohobo: Big Ramifications: MysteryGuest: Yeah, well I bet the marker assault guy won't feel the need do it again. That ain't funny-he gets zero sympathy from me.

Grow up.

Grow up? Really? He could have went full biatch and claimed sexual harassment. As it is, all he did was throw a few punches. Easy-peasy-Japaneasy. Should have ended there. Sometimes actions have consequences. Has this been a woman who had a dick drawn on her face, and said woman beat up the guy, I'm sure reactions would be different.


Learn how to laugh at yourself.

PUNCHING ON???? Breaking someone's nose while they are ASLEEP????

You idiot.
 
2014-05-04 06:56:07 AM

Creoena: moothemagiccow: Creoena: Fark_Guy_Rob: Signs you might suck at life:

1.)  You are 30 and have roommates

[img.4plebs.org image 250x272]
/Maybe you own a home and rent a room for extra income
//Or you were laid off
///Or went though a nasty divorce
////I doubt any apply to these idiots but that's one of the most idiotic statements I've read on fark all morning

Pretty sure going through a nasty divorce is a sign you suck at life

So, the soldier who gets deployed to Afghanistan, Iraq, etc and comes back to find his wife divorcing him because he "wasn't around enough" sucks at life?


No, it just means like most soldier's wives, she's a worthless tramp. Also, he may be in a sitcom.

/also, dicks on faces aren't supposed to be funny because homosexual equality blah blah, but dicks on faces are hilarious. I wouldn't ever draw one myself, but I've laughed m farking ass off seeing it done. Lulz, homos.
 
2014-05-04 06:56:39 AM
Wow, what a dick!
 
2014-05-04 06:58:10 AM

robohobo: Creoena: moothemagiccow: Creoena: Fark_Guy_Rob: Signs you might suck at life:

1.)  You are 30 and have roommates

[img.4plebs.org image 250x272]
/Maybe you own a home and rent a room for extra income
//Or you were laid off
///Or went though a nasty divorce
////I doubt any apply to these idiots but that's one of the most idiotic statements I've read on fark all morning

Pretty sure going through a nasty divorce is a sign you suck at life

So, the soldier who gets deployed to Afghanistan, Iraq, etc and comes back to find his wife divorcing him because he "wasn't around enough" sucks at life?

No


My point exactly.
 
2014-05-04 07:00:37 AM

Big Ramifications: robohobo: Big Ramifications: MysteryGuest: Yeah, well I bet the marker assault guy won't feel the need do it again. That ain't funny-he gets zero sympathy from me.

Grow up.

Grow up? Really? He could have went full biatch and claimed sexual harassment. As it is, all he did was throw a few punches. Easy-peasy-Japaneasy. Should have ended there. Sometimes actions have consequences. Has this been a woman who had a dick drawn on her face, and said woman beat up the guy, I'm sure reactions would be different.

Learn how to laugh at yourself.

PUNCHING ON???? Breaking someone's nose while they are ASLEEP????

You idiot.


Actions have consequences. He was drawn on while asleep. With a farking COCK. Did he go overboard? Maybe, But if you fark with people, don't expect to no be farked with back,  Cause guess what? That's how real life works. This guy clearly knew the victim would take a good deal of offense to having a dick drawn on his face, yet did it anyway. Consequences, biatch.
 
2014-05-04 07:03:08 AM
Cider House Rules?
 
2014-05-04 07:05:42 AM

BenJammin: Cider House Rules?


Wasn't that about an abortionist who huffed ether?
 
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