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11580 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 May 2014 at 9:44 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-05-03 01:50:22 PM  

ArcadianRefugee: "When I use a word," Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, "it means just what I choose it to mean-neither more nor less."


Ooh!  good quote.  I like that.

Reminds me of this from Alice in Wonderland:
"Contrariwise," continued Tweedledee, "if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't. That's logic."
 
2014-05-03 01:57:52 PM  

FizixJunkee: TheWhoppah: Obstructionist asshat.  I'm glad the court ordered him to provide CDs full of digital documents at $1 each.


He's in IT.  Perhaps he's autistic or Aspie and takes things very literally?

Or perhaps he's a moran who's only heard the term "Xerox" instead of "photocopy", and is therefore unfamiliar with the term "photocopy"?


If you read the actual transcript, this is what he ends up claiming. That people in "his generation" know it only as Xerox. His attorney then asks why the other attorney wouldn't just use a more readily understood term like "copy machine".
 
2014-05-03 01:59:21 PM  
this is outstandingly stupid crap
 
2014-05-03 02:34:37 PM  

Gunboat: Q: In those fourteen to fifteen thousand days, did you ever, even once, hear the term "photocopy machine"?
A: I'm sure I have.
Q: And what does that term, "photocopy machine" mean to you?



A) Well, funny you should ask as I have heard that term today and we were just discussing the definition but we never did finish the conversation
 
2014-05-03 03:23:26 PM  
I'm glad others have pointed out that the term is susceptible to broad or specific meanings, and given that this case involved the cost of duplicating documents, specificity in terminology in discussing technology was likely of significant importance. The questioning attorney clearly didn't appreciate that; the other attorney quite obviously did, and even tried to explain to the questioning attorney the different types of technology used in document duplication. The questioning attorney was just too damn dumb to rewrite his depo script in his head and ask the foundational questions that would get him to the answer he wanted.
 
2014-05-03 03:29:52 PM  
Gunboat:
Q: Did you speak English growing up?  Is English your first language.
A: Yes.
Q: How old are you?
A: 45
Q:  So you've been speaking English for more than 40 years, right?
A: I guess so.


www.piscitella.com
 
2014-05-03 03:55:59 PM  

RoyBatty: Cndn Bacon: RoyBatty: I don't know what can or can't be asked in a deposition, but why not ask the guy if he's ever had to copy documents and ask him how he does that, what machines he uses.

I understand wanting to be cautious in a deposition, but this also seemed like a strategy to waste dollars and run out the clock (limited time and expense of a deposition). Since it was a gov employee employing that strategy, I say fark him.

I assume you didn't actually watch the video in the article?

Why would you assume that?

Did you watch the video?

Did the lawyer at any time in the video ask the dude what machine he uses to copy documents when he is at the office?


Wow. That was a very long post for a fairly innocuous question.

But to answer your question - yes. It was the last question in the video, hence my question to you.

Q: Do you have machines there where I can put in a paper document, push a button or two, and out will come copies of that paper document also on paper? Do you have such a machine?

A Yes, sir.

Q: What do you call that machine?

A: Xerox.
 
2014-05-03 04:10:50 PM  

Cndn Bacon: RoyBatty: Cndn Bacon: RoyBatty: I don't know what can or can't be asked in a deposition, but why not ask the guy if he's ever had to copy documents and ask him how he does that, what machines he uses.

I understand wanting to be cautious in a deposition, but this also seemed like a strategy to waste dollars and run out the clock (limited time and expense of a deposition). Since it was a gov employee employing that strategy, I say fark him.

I assume you didn't actually watch the video in the article?

Why would you assume that?

Did you watch the video?

Did the lawyer at any time in the video ask the dude what machine he uses to copy documents when he is at the office?

Wow. That was a very long post for a fairly innocuous question.

But to answer your question - yes. It was the last question in the video, hence my question to you.

Q: Do you have machines there where I can put in a paper document, push a button or two, and out will come copies of that paper document also on paper? Do you have such a machine?

A Yes, sir.

Q: What do you call that machine?

A: Xerox.


Well you certainly and most definitely got me there, but fwiw, asking if you read the article or watched the video isn't all that innocuous. In my case I'll lay off the responsibility to 3 hours of sleep. But that Xerox question? It should've been his 2nd or 3rd question, and never have taken him 8 minutes to get there.
 
2014-05-03 04:29:00 PM  
Local government troll tries to screw the people and ands up costing the people a lot of money and time.

This is why we can't have nice things.
 
2014-05-03 04:45:11 PM  

FizixJunkee: Not necessarily.  The guy may not be that bright.  The way "Band-aid" is the go-to word for any self-adhesive bandage, "Xerox" is commonly used in place of the word "photocopy."  If everyone in the office uses "Xerox" as the verb, the guy may not have any exposure to the word "photocopy".


Bullshiat. There is not a person who has worked more than a day in any office in this country -- and who has an IQ above 7 -- that doesn't know what a photocopy is.
 
2014-05-03 05:29:42 PM  

gweilo8888: FizixJunkee: Not necessarily.  The guy may not be that bright.  The way "Band-aid" is the go-to word for any self-adhesive bandage, "Xerox" is commonly used in place of the word "photocopy."  If everyone in the office uses "Xerox" as the verb, the guy may not have any exposure to the word "photocopy".

Bullshiat. There is not a person who has worked more than a day in any office in this country -- and who has an IQ above 7 -- that doesn't know what a photocopy is.


This.  The amount of people on the side of the willfully obtuse guy shouldn't be surprising, this is Fark after all, but damn.
 
2014-05-03 07:13:07 PM  
And the court reporter just sits there with a bland expression while screaming internally, "THE BUTLER DID IT?? THE BUTLER?!"

/ :3
 
2014-05-03 07:13:49 PM  

Cheesehead_Dave: [farm4.staticflickr.com image 320x240]


Good lord.  I haven't seen one of those sleeves in decades.
 
2014-05-03 07:15:46 PM  

pheed: I really hope the Times (or anyone) will continue this sort of series. Comedy drawn from real life and every day people and events. It's fantastic.


FTbottomoftheA:
Note to Readers:
This marks the debut of a new series, presented by Op-Docs, that transforms verbatim (word for word) legal transcripts into dramatic, and often comedic, performances. Here you will find re-creations of actual events from the halls of law and government. You, our readers, can help us find material for future episodes. Have you come across court trials, depositions or government hearings that you think are surprising, bizarre or baffling - and lend themselves to performance? We especially seek original, publicly available transcripts, along with details about the source. Email us at o­pi­n­io­n­*vid­eo­[nospam-﹫-backwards]s­emity­n*co­m and include "Verbatim" in the subject line.
- Jason Spingarn-Koff
 
2014-05-03 07:21:23 PM  

freewill: I sent this to my father last week, who sent it to my police officer uncle. He called me crying with tears of laughter, said it reminded him of most his time as a beat cop, both being deposed and trying to talk to suspects.


I briefly sidelined as a video recorder of legal depositions.  Sometimes you'd get someone really smart who would lead the lawyers on merry chases like this, but in a way where it couldn't be conclusively proven they were being obstructionist.  Naturally, these guys were scumbags who were trying to hide their complicity in corporate malfeasance, but I had to admire their adroitness.  It takes quick wit and strong nerves to keep that up under the frustrated glares of a half-dozen opposing lawyers, and the added pressure of a video camera limiting your options to muddy the waters afterwards.
 
2014-05-03 09:11:55 PM  
media.10news.com
 
2014-05-04 03:06:57 AM  
Am I the only one who pronounces it foh-TOH-k'pee? Accent on the 2nd sullable
 
2014-05-04 09:16:54 AM  
Oh my farking god, that is hilarious.
 
2014-05-04 11:34:48 AM  

Thomas Hertl's Playoff Beard: Am I the only one who pronounces it foh-TOH-k'pee? Accent on the 2nd sullable


Um, I'm going to go with yes... Your version sounds like a Klingon weapon or something...
 
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