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(Time)   Restaurants now seating socially awkward single diners with giant stuffed animals to make them feel less socially awkward   (time.com) divider line 120
    More: Asinine, picture books  
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4366 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Apr 2014 at 8:03 AM (18 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-04-29 01:37:33 AM
The only time I feel awkward when dining alone is when the hostess is trying to get me to sit at the bar even though the place is relatively empty.
 
2014-04-29 01:47:54 AM

DrunkenYodaZen: The only time I feel awkward when dining alone is when the hostess is trying to get me to sit at the bar even though the place is relatively empty.


WTF? The bar is BEST place for dining alone. You can chat with the bartender, get more drinks more quickly; and there might be a few other people at the bar area you speak with.
 
2014-04-29 07:15:25 AM
i236.photobucket.com

Approves.
 
2014-04-29 07:17:59 AM

Eddie Adams from Torrance: [i236.photobucket.com image 480x264]

Approves.


Needs a fern.
 
2014-04-29 08:05:26 AM
Can I bring my own giant stuffed animal to dine with, or is that improper etiquette?
 
2014-04-29 08:05:53 AM
Is it rude to read at the table if you are dining alone?
 
2014-04-29 08:06:23 AM
I always bring a book. A real book, hardcovered and old time-y...not my kindle, because f*ck it... if I'm eating alone I want to look snobby and pretentious like maybe I'm too important to have a dinner date.
 
2014-04-29 08:06:36 AM
To use a phrase highly disliked by Farkers:

Yeah, no.
 
2014-04-29 08:07:41 AM

optikeye: DrunkenYodaZen: The only time I feel awkward when dining alone is when the hostess is trying to get me to sit at the bar even though the place is relatively empty.

WTF? The bar is BEST place for dining alone. You can chat with the bartender, get more drinks more quickly; and there might be a few other people at the bar area you speak with.


Sometimes a person doesn't want to chat.
 
2014-04-29 08:07:55 AM
seat me with this dude and i'll come

heystupid.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-04-29 08:08:13 AM
I dine alone because I'm an unpleasant bastard, not because I'm a quirky individual that is just shy. Get this farking thing away from me if you even want me to come back!
 
2014-04-29 08:09:11 AM

optikeye: DrunkenYodaZen: The only time I feel awkward when dining alone is when the hostess is trying to get me to sit at the bar even though the place is relatively empty.

WTF? The bar is BEST place for dining alone. You can chat with the bartender, get more drinks more quickly; and there might be a few other people at the bar area you speak with.


I agree. A few months ago I was at a Chili's restaurant eating at the bar and this nice guy--about my age, relatively nice--started chatting me up and bought me a couple of margaritas. When we finished eating, we went back to his place and...

You get the idea.

/Still have his number
//Must...call...him...
 
2014-04-29 08:09:20 AM

namegoeshere: Is it rude to read at the table if you are dining alone?


One can't be rude if there's nobody else to offend (or nobody whose opinion you care about, anyway).
 
2014-04-29 08:09:45 AM
Must have worked, this guy brought his two fellow diners home!

picsthatdontsuck.com
 
2014-04-29 08:10:25 AM
There must be a Calvin and Hobbes strip that would fit this thread but hell if I can think of it.
 
2014-04-29 08:10:52 AM

LaurenAguilera: I always bring a book. A real book, hardcovered and old time-y...not my kindle, because f*ck it... if I'm eating alone I want to look snobby and pretentious like maybe I'm too important to have a dinner date.


I sometimes being my tablet and get onto the restaurant's wireless network to watch the news or something. Always considerate, though sqq head phones are a must
 
2014-04-29 08:10:59 AM
"gigantic stuffed animals are seated across the table from solo diners"

Yeah, that'll make you much less conspicuous.  Just get carry-out if you can't deal.
 
2014-04-29 08:11:49 AM

maram500: LaurenAguilera: I always bring a book. A real book, hardcovered and old time-y...not my kindle, because f*ck it... if I'm eating alone I want to look snobby and pretentious like maybe I'm too important to have a dinner date.

I sometimes being my tablet and get onto the restaurant's wireless network to watch the news or something. Always considerate, though sqq head phones are a must


Always considerate, though--headphones are a must.

(Duck autocorrect.)
 
2014-04-29 08:12:52 AM

DrunkenYodaZen: The only time I feel awkward when dining alone is when the hostess is trying to get me to sit at the bar even though the place is relatively empty.


i've never had that happen

i've eaten alone many times...only times i've eaten at the bar (or at a counter, like at waffle house) were totally my choice. and never has my dine-alone time been due to a social awkwardness, either...sometimes it's because my wife is out of town, sometimes it's because i want to eat food that my family won't eat (middle eastern, etc). and even when i was single, i would go out sometimes instead of getting take out, just because.
 
2014-04-29 08:13:41 AM
A stuffed animal really does make you more conspicuous. Obviously, this restaurant needs to buy a real doll for solo diners.
 
2014-04-29 08:14:11 AM
I eat alone 90% of the time. I like to eat out, I'm single, and my friends don't go out period.

Doesn't bother me, I typically just order whatever and read fark or a book on my phone. I don't really care what 'people think'. I'm there to eat.
 
2014-04-29 08:15:21 AM
Because if there is one thing more sad than dining alone it's doing it with a pretend person.
 
2014-04-29 08:16:24 AM
This is why I pay 5 people to follow me around all the time and look interested in what I'm saying.
 
2014-04-29 08:20:44 AM
What if I want to sit with Snufkin?
 
2014-04-29 08:20:45 AM
I used to eat out for every meal and one or two of them was always alone.  Never saw the big deal in it.  Brought a book to read, relaxed, enjoyed myself.  I usually preferred it.
 
2014-04-29 08:21:09 AM
Japan?
 
2014-04-29 08:21:51 AM
Then you get in to a conversation with the stuffed animal. Maybe you make a connection. Maybe there's some chemistry. There's no denying it. This stuffie and you are really connecting. So, you slide your chair around the table so the conversation can get a little more personal. Stre in to those big, button eyes. Order some wine. Maybe touch stuffie's arm. Oh that's soft. Stuffie aint saying "no" and those big button eyes tell you she's just as in to this as you are. "Oh you got something on your cute cheek. Let me get that for you." Fluffy paw upon your chest. Oh my.

So you go in for the kiss and next thing you know, you're in the alley and the bus boys are kicking in your kidneys. You'll be pissing blood for a week, but it was worth it. You try to get to see stuffie again but the maitre d has your number on his shiat list and won't take a reservation from you no matter hard you try. Get a throwaway phone, try an accent "I vould like to get table zee-ix wit zee be-a-uteeful blue bear-a for a zingle." "Harry, you call here again and I'll call the cops. Get help. You need it."

Stuffie! I've thrown a thousand baseballs at a hundred milk bottles. The plush toys I win are nothing compared to you. You understand me! You get me! I wait in the alley every night hoping someone will spill wine on you and the restaurant throws you out. Even with the wine of another upon you, you are still mine as I am yours. My life is just a boring repetition of race car racing, Presidential brain surgeries, spaceship flying and massive wealth gathering without you!
 
2014-04-29 08:22:07 AM

Madison_Smiled: What if I want to sit with Snufkin?


I guess... but that means I get Teddy Ruxpin. Woo! Story with my dinner!
 
2014-04-29 08:22:51 AM

pippi longstocking: I dine alone because I'm an unpleasant bastard, not because I'm a quirky individual that is just shy. Get this farking thing away from me if you even want me to come back!


This.  I dine out alone when I've done a poor job of meal planning, have an urge for some difficult to cook meal, am away from home, and basically when I'm hungry.  I'm content with my solitude.
 
2014-04-29 08:23:42 AM
Is this not Big Bang Theory material? If a person is actually quite socially awkward then this would make them ever more comfortable, certainly. Myself, and probably for most people, it would end up starting conversations.
 
2014-04-29 08:24:11 AM
The success of McDonalds/Starbucks is down in part to that you can eat there alone without feeling weird.
 
2014-04-29 08:26:34 AM

optikeye: DrunkenYodaZen: The only time I feel awkward when dining alone is when the hostess is trying to get me to sit at the bar even though the place is relatively empty.

WTF? The bar is BEST place for dining alone. You can chat with the bartender, get more drinks more quickly; and there might be a few other people at the bar area you speak with.


And usually a couple TVs. A table is where I sit if I have a newspaper or a book, bar is all other times.

/I travel a lot for work
//ate at the bar here in Mexico City last night
 
2014-04-29 08:27:09 AM
By the way, this is the second thread in as many days that suggests that those of us who are Alone and who go to restaurants Alone are supposed to feel BAD about it.  Has it ever occurred to Society In General that there are some people who simply function better when they're not with other people?  We are doing just fine by ourselves and we don't need your shaming or your pity.
 
2014-04-29 08:28:26 AM
Ever feel self-conscious eating out alone?

Add me to the long list of farkers saying "Nope".
 
2014-04-29 08:29:20 AM
Approves:www.coffeecoffeeandmorecoffee.com
 
2014-04-29 08:31:54 AM
oh my gosh. I love the idea!! I would sit with a huge stuffed bear and play with his bowtie. it would be amazing. probably the best date I would ever be on!
 
2014-04-29 08:33:06 AM

FLMountainMan: I used to eat out for every meal and one or two of them was always alone.  Never saw the big deal in it.  Brought a book to read, relaxed, enjoyed myself.  I usually preferred it.


Same here.  I traveled for my job so I've eaten thousands of dinners solo.  I have a book on me wherever I go (smartphones have really made this easier) so being alone for a meal has never been any big deal.
 
2014-04-29 08:33:59 AM
But does the stuffed animal ever pick up the check?!  Noooooo....
 
2014-04-29 08:35:42 AM

DrunkenYodaZen: The only time I feel awkward when dining alone is when the hostess is trying to get me to sit at the bar even though the place is relatively empty.


This.
 
2014-04-29 08:37:48 AM

Pants full of macaroni!!: By the way, this is the second thread in as many days that suggests that those of us who are Alone and who go to restaurants Alone are supposed to feel BAD about it.  Has it ever occurred to Society In General that there are some people who simply function better when they're not with other people?  We are doing just fine by ourselves and we don't need your shaming or your pity.


I think it's that dining alone in public makes many people uncomfortable and they try not to do it. So, when they see someone dining alone they assume that person is uncomfortable too.

The number of people who prefer to dine alone appears to be a small minority so it's not really surprising if those people are not well understood by the majority.

People are also naturally suspicious of loners who shun the company of other humans. As social animals the "loners' are most likely to be the dangerous or insane ones. I am NOT saying all who eat alone are insane or dangerous, but instinct does make some people suspicious around such a person.

Some people enjoy talking to themselves out loud to figure things out. However most people will NOT sit next to that person on the bus given a choice.
 
2014-04-29 08:38:15 AM
I order a table for two.  Two drinks, appetizer and two meals.  Then I tell the waitstaff that my supermodel girlfriend is late.  Probably held up at the Sport Illustrated photo shoot.  Gotta be careful with those thong photos when it comes to SI, you know.  After I eat, I flip open my phone and have an imaginary fight with my imaginary super model girlfriend:  "Your career?!  What about us?! Oh, you say you do but you're not here!  You're probably standing topless with a micro bikini bottom and  your perfect breasts exposed for all the world to see.  You don't care about me!  You don't care about us!"

Then, I either run crying in to the men's room where I climb out a window or, if it's a fancy place like IHOP, I get her meal to go, leave a generous tip and storm out in a huff and sob quietly while waiting for the bus.
 
2014-04-29 08:39:01 AM
eatinginbrowardwithhanna.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-04-29 08:39:50 AM
Pls just post some oppai pics and let's be done w/ this thread.
 
2014-04-29 08:39:58 AM

phaseolus: Ever feel self-conscious eating out alone?

Add me to the long list of farkers saying "Nope".


Also nope. Cripes, you're in a restaurant, not at a school dance alone.

/recall recently reading about robot dance partners
//probably also Japan
 
2014-04-29 08:40:36 AM

Ker_Thwap: I dine out alone when I've done a poor job of meal planning, have an urge for some difficult to cook meal, am away from home, and basically when I'm hungry.  I'm content with my solitude.


Me too.  I have no issue dining alone. Most of the time it's because of that hard to cook/requires pricey ingredients that I will not use all of/I just don't want to make the mess the dish requires thing.

 If I wanted to dine with a giant silent partner, I could always go out to dinner with my ex.
 
2014-04-29 08:44:44 AM
I want hot wings and pasta so badly, I think I will find a bar with some shiatty spaghetti and some glorious wings and order both. For myself.
 
2014-04-29 08:46:41 AM

ltdanman44: seat me with this dude and i'll come

[heystupid.files.wordpress.com image 450x338]



static.comicvine.com
Have this dudette sit on me and I'll come

/2011 Cheetara kicks 80's Cheetara's ass in every way possible
 
2014-04-29 08:46:58 AM
As awkward as a dinner with Kawaii?

www.independent.co.uk
 
2014-04-29 08:47:58 AM
pbs.twimg.com

That's a Hell of a lot of pancakes. Are they turning into Americans?
OH SH*T IT'S A GHOST!
Sorry, I panicked.
 
2014-04-29 08:54:21 AM

MythDragon: /2011 Cheetara kicks 80's Cheetara's ass in every way possible


NO U
www.cheezey.org
 
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